A/N: Yay! Fast update. Sorry if the last two were completely awful; so far I've only gotten one review--usually I have at least three or so. Oh well! Reviews aren't required; I've said that several times, I believe. This one should be more to your liking. Maybe I didn't hear from as many because no one else noticed that I updated? Again--oh well. We haven't seen that much of Winry in this thing, huh? Be prepared to see more. Now.
Ed: Crap. Winry.
Envy: (grins) Poor, pitiful Chibi-san.
Ame: You see her to, you know. I thought that you always read over the script before-hand.
Envy: I was busy reading that Sessh/Inu smut stuff that you wrote. That's like Eddo an' me. Incest! These "Naraku" person interests me…think he'd wanna have a three-some…?
Ed: No way! That guy is cree-py. No way that we're goin' there.
Envy: ….Aw…we never do enough sexually deviant things…
Al: (still stuck on the whole "incest" thing) Yuck. There're stories out there about Ed and me…doing things. Inappropriate things.
Wrath: (bursting into tears) How could you Ally?! Wahhh! I always thought that you and Ed were too close!
Al: (heaving a sigh) I'm not really with Nii-san. Some people just write about it…Ick.
Ame: The two of you together…two Elrics doing stuff that they ought not to be doing…I kinda like that thought….
Everyone: (terrified of what Ame will incorporate into the story next)
Ame: Octopus. DWSOP doesn't have eggplants in her ears. I know; I checked.
Envy: Whew. Glad that she's back in Crazyville. Maybe she'll just forget all about taking my chibi away from me. She better or I'll…. (starts muttering about various torture methods)
Ame: Fullmetal Alchemist does not have any flying pigs. If I owned it, I would fix that. The pigs would also be purple, and Ed would wear less than Envy.
Envy: How much would it cost for her to buy us?
Ed: I don't believe Arakawa-sensei's selling. Thank goodness. I've read that fluffy lingerie idea of hers…
Envy: (wishing he knew where that idea was and where to buy the underwear in question)
Ame: Now, Winry will dance in a chicken suit.
Winry: (coming out of the kitchen with a glass of water) Not even if those purple pigs of yours existed.
Ame: (very upset) They're flying pigs! Flying!
Of Palm Trees and Chibis: Chapter Seventeen: Winry, Without Her Chicken Suit
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Envy was confused. Well, considering strange mortal traditions, this was, more often than not, the case. But this, no matter how many times he puzzled through it, he just could not figure out. Did people normally do things like this? He'd never seen Chibi-san do something so…strange. This Winry person must have some type of demon blood in her veins. The teenager had gone out shopping with them--more like spending all of Ed's money--and something had caught her eye. It, of course neither belonged to Winry nor anyone that she knew. Apparently that gave Winry the right to destr--I mean examine--it.
What did that new model of motorcycle ever do to her? Envy completely agreed with that thought as he observed her dismembering the pitiful vehicle. Grease covered the automail-mechanic's arms and her face had smudges of oil on it. The green-haired homunculus was trying to keep as far away from her as possible; if anyone were too close, they'd be showered with bolts, screws and the occasional splash of mechanical fluids. So what if Chibi-san had told him to "watch her?" That was easier said than done. Sure, homunculi couldn't be killed…but that didn't mean that the pain wasn't…well, painful.
And Chibi could be real pissed and all, but he wasn't going anywhere near that madness of flying wrenches and arms. "Winry! What the hell are you doing to that poor motorcycle?!" Well, looked like it was time to face the music--or whatever sexual pleasures that Ed decided to remove.
"Ed! I've never seen this model before! Isn't it amazing? Now I just have to figure out how to put it back together…" And, because the world hated him, a man ran up to Envy and began to shriek hysterically while pointing at Envy.
"What the hell does she think she's doing?! That's my bike!"
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"Do you know how much it cost for me to replace that bike?! I told you to watch her…you are so sleeping on the couch tonight…"
"Um….Eddo?" Ever since the Winry incident, something had been bothering the Sin. "Are all human females like that? 'Cause, I mean, it's amazing that the human race didn't die out a long time ago…."
"No," the alchemist muttered, rolling his eyes. "Only Winry's like that. Thank goodness….But you can understand why I'd rather be with a guy, right?"
"I thought it was because I was special, amazing in bed, really cute, an awesome killer, sexy, had a great personality…"
Ed smirked. "You may be all those things, but you're still not getting into my pants tonight." Damn, he thought, trying to remember where he put those dirty videotapes of Ed and he engaged in some…interesting activities.
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A/N: So there. I updated. Within two weeks; now I must work on updating the other two stories I have. Your next update will be the Wednesday after next. That means on the second of May. Yup.
Envy: You've actually got a schedule going now?
Ame: Yes. (very smug) Within two weeks, I'll update everything. It's my new saying.
Ed: So you might update before the second; you posted last on a Sunday, and today's Wednessday.
Ame: It depends on the other stories; this one will be updated before them. I'll only update after the other two have updates.
Ed: As in, you won't work on another update until you're done with chapter two of both LS and Unnatural.
Ame: Exactly. So now you know. I'll stop typing now.
Wrath: But...why's that the chapter title?
Ame: Because I'm running out of nifty things to put as chapter titles. Now I will stop typing. Bye-bye!