Spring Showers
Chapter One: Just Another Day Over the Hedge
"Come on, move it, move it!" RJ commanded the others as the burst forth from the Johnson's home, carrying with them the fruits of a very successful raid. They had easily evaded the security system, Hammy using his speed and agility (and RJ with his handy laser pointer) to slip easily into the home and deactivate the system.
Everything moved like clockwork. They moved just as smoothly as they had done on the past hundred raids or so. Since last year when RJ had officially joined the family, they had worked out their raid routine down to the smallest detail, ensuring that they always brought back what they would need (or want, truth be told) while making sure minimal damage was done to the homes of their human "benefactors."
Even then, they couldn't help messing around with any of the suburbanite's heads once in a while.
"Hey Verne, you got what you wanted?" RJ yelled back, seeing Verne carrying out two or three boxes full of low-fat, no preservatives food alternatives to the otherwise "junk" food that the family had a tendency to favor.
"Yeah! This should be good for the triplets and me!" Verne said happily. Said triplets were dragging out bags of assorted chocolate bars, six packs of soda, and bags of flavored potato and tortilla chips. Thankfully, Penny and Lou were helping out Verne carry out a few more bags of assorted healthy foods for them and their kids.
"Let's go Tiger! We've got what we wanted!" Stella dashed out, tossing a few more packages of food onto the red wagon Tiger was hitched to.
"Did you forget anything, Stella dear?" Tiger asked, looking over the haul, as well as Stella herself, with a smile.
"Nope, I'm sure that's everything we wanted and then some." As soon as Stella jumped onto his back, he took off, blazing past the rest of the Hedgies, beating them to the hedge and disappearing into the thick foliage.
"Come on everybody, Ozzie can't hold them off for long!" RJ reminded them. Ozzie, and his backup, his loving daughter Heather, were keeping the human idiots busy out in front of the home. They had started the raid when the humans left, but apparently, they had returned after a quick trip to supermarket… a block away. "Lazy humans." RJ half sighed, half chuckled to himself.
"Okay RJ, let's get out of here!" Ozzie called to RJ, Heather tailing right behind him before the two of them dove into the greenery. RJ mentally checked off who had already escaped and realized one member of his family was missing. "Hammy!"
He quickly ran through the backyard, finding Hammy struggling to pull out a huge bag of cookies through an otherwise tiny opening.
"Come on Hammy, just leave it, we'll get more!" RJ tried to convince the young squirrel to ditch the bag of chocolate chip cookies.
"I can't leave them!" Hammy futily pulled at the bag. "I like the cookies!" RJ pulled him away from the bag and looked straight at him.
"Hammy, I promise you we'll get more cookies!" He pleaded with Hammy. RJ pulled one of Hammy's hands and firmly tugged, trying to urge the squirrel to ditch the cookies, as hard as he knew it would be. The squirrel turned and, looking at the urgency on his best friend's face, nodded and let go of his remaining grip around the bag, trusting the raccoon's promise. They ditched the bag of cookies and quickly sprinted off into the hedge, disappearing as the voices of the human's came into earshot.
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"WAHOO!" Quillo, Bucky, and Spike dashed back and forth between anything that stood in their way, working off the sugar and caffeine from the carbonated beverages they had just consumed, running with speed rivaling Hammy's around and into everything from trees and bushes to parents…
"OOF!" Penny and Lou caught Quillo and Bucky, while Spike continued his sugar charged reign of terror.
"WHEEEEEEEEEE!" The little blur of spikes circled everyone, laughing raucously, enjoying the sugar rush.
"WHOA THERE!" Stella jumped from the way of the running ball of spikes. "Whoever said never to run around with scissors never dealt with the sugar-crazed porcupine!" Stella said.
"That's a good one, my lovely ebony goddess." Tiger chuckled. Stella eventually realized that she was in the arms of her lover, being carried bridal style, and blushed.
"Uh, thanks Tiger." Stella replied simply as she hopped down from his arms, one of the few times she was at a loss for words. "You did really well today." She added. She
had to admit, she was impressed at his show of strength over the past few raids, being able to carry more and run so much faster than before. "But still…" She returned to her senses. "You're not doing well enough. If I had tossed in one more bag of marshmallows, I bet you couldn't move an inch!" Stella smiled at him.
"Then I'll work to become stronger and faster, mon cherie." Tiger flexed his arms and listened to Stella's giggle… and inevitable remark.
"Showoff."
Still, he loved the admiring looks he would get from her when she looked at him while she thought he wasn't looking. Then again, she was the inspiration for him to get off of his fat butt and get some exercise into his routine.
But she still has yet to get him to swim yet.
"WATCH IT!" Verne yelled out to the others, hoping to dear heavens that no one would run into the sprinting ball of thorns.
"Yeesh!" RJ dodged Spike and ran directly into Ozzie and Heather. "I'm starting to regret introducing soda to the kids." RJ sighed as he shook his head.
"Well, they were bound to get to it someday." Ozzie said.
"Too bad they can't really control themselves when they get their hands on some soda. Just a little and they go all cuckoo." Heather added, hiding the fact that she had a Super Mega Ultra Gulp behind her back.
"Yeah, well, they're kids after all." RJ chuckled as he strained to keep track of the grey, spiky blur, getting ready to jump again if he should come back that way.
"Hey RJ…" Heather started. "You did a really great job today." She commended him. "Thanks for guiding us, like you always do." A slight blush formed on her cheeks and looked away from RJ. Part of her was hoping that he would notice how much she had grown up over the years he had been with them; just to garner a little attention from the handsome raccoon.
"You should really thank your dad, Heather." RJ put his hand on Ozzie's shoulder and smiled to him. "Without such a great thespian as your father, who knows where we'd be." RJ thanked him, to which Ozzie returned with a bow.
"You're very much welcome my dear director." Ozzie replied, feeling proud of the recognition being bestowed upon him.
"Dad!" Heather rolled her eyes, embarrassed by her father when she was trying to get RJ's attention. Some things never do change.
"GOTCHA!" A yell caught everyone's attention. When everyone turned and looked, they saw a red blur catch up to the grey, spiky blur and bring down the sugar hopped up porcupine into an uncontrollable giggle. Spike may have been fast, but no one was faster than Hammy, no matter how much sugar or caffeine they consumed.
"Great job Hamsquad!" RJ ran up to the squirrel and helped him up.
"Oh, thank you so much Hamilton." Penny said as she gathered Spike into her arms. "I swear, I'm going to really have to watch what you and your brothers are eating or drinking."
"Yeah, the last thing we want is for you or anyone else to get hurt when you go on another spree." Lou warned the brothers sternly. "So no soda for a week." He added. Quickly, the three brothers began to protest their father's decision. But soon, their protests were hushed as they crashed from their sugar highs.
"You okay, Hammy?" RJ asked, wondering if he had gotten any quills into his skin. "Did you get poked anywhere?"
"Nope, I'm okay RJ." Hammy quickly stood up and smiled up to the raccoon.
"You didn't drink any soda or one of those newfangled super caffeinated energy drinks, did you?" Verne asked cautiously.
"Don't need it Verne." Hammy replied, much to Verne's relief.
"Hey Hammy, why don't you come with me for a second?" RJ said, pulling him away from Verne and the others. RJ quickly winked at Verne, to which Verne just nodded,
understanding that RJ just wanted Hammy to follow him.
"Okay! Where are we going?" Hammy quickly asked.
"Just over there. I want to show you something." RJ said with a sly smile growing on his face.
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"Hey Hammy, are you okay?" RJ asked as they walked through the undergrowth, heading towards some secretive place only RJ seemed to know about.
"Um, yeah, I am." Hammy said, though a noticeable frown was plastered over the young squirrel's face.
"Still wishing that you were able to bring that bag of cookies home, huh?" RJ looked to him, sympathetic of how the squirrel must be feeling. After all, he had left one
container or two of Spuddies before.
"They were chocolate chip cookies!" Hammy whined, regretting how much he had to leave them behind. "And it was such a big bag!"
"Hey, hey, Hamsquad." RJ stopped and made Hammy look to him. "I did promise that we'd get more cookies, right?'
"Well, yeah." Hammy said, somewhat nervously. RJ's smile grew wider as he pulled away from him.
"Just stay there for a second." RJ continued to move backwards until he was by a short, large bush.
"What are you…" Hammy stopped in the middle of his query when he saw RJ push aside some of the branches and reveal to him…
"The Chocolate Lover's Pure Delight Cookies, Warehouse-Size." RJ smiled proudly. "25 pounds of chocolate, caramel, walnuts, almonds, and mint, packed into cookies as large as manholes." He continued to explain. "And it's all yours."
"Whoa!" Hammy was in awe, staring up at the huge bag of cookies that towered over him and RJ. "RJ, how? Where?" Hammy turned his attention to RJ, leaning against the bag with a wide grin.
"Go on, dive in!" RJ chuckled. Immediately, Hammy disappeared into a blur. RJ was about to turn to the bag to watch Hammy rip it open and dive in when…
"Thanks, RJ." Hammy appeared in front of him. Immediately, Hammy gave him a big hug, holding him tight and murring ever so softly.
"Uh, you're very welcome, Hammy." RJ took a second to let the situation register in his head before deciding how to respond. He returned the hug with earnest. "You deserve it, buddy." RJ whispered to him. They stayed together for a little while, just letting Hammy hug himself out.
Truth be told, he kinda liked it when the red squirrel gave him hugs. It never failed to make him feel happier, no matter how good or bad his day would be. And Hammy always did seem to know when a hug would do him best. But sometimes, he wondered why it had such an effect on him.
"Hey, come on, Hammy! Don't keep those delicious cookies waiting for you!" RJ shook them out of the tender moment.
"Okay!" Hammy broke the hug and perked up. He dashed up to the top of the huge bag and started tearing it open. In a few seconds, cookie crumbs began to shower from above.
"Hey Hammy! Not so fast! You'll give yourself a stomachache!" RJ warned him.
"RJ, try some! These cookies are absolutely, positively, awesomely great!" Hammy held up a fourth of one of the huge cookies before tossing it down.
"Whoa! Thanks Hammy! Looks delicious." RJ chuckled.
"Do you think the others would like some?" Hammy poked out of the bag again, cheeks full of nuts and caramel.
"Sure, I think they'd love to have some!" RJ said.
"So let's bring it to them!" Hammy scampered down. "But they only get to have one cookie!" Hammy stated.
"I'm sure one cookie will be enough for everyone." RJ stated as a matter of factly. One cookie was as big as a manhole after all. The two set off, dragging along the huge bag, as heavy as it was, to the rest of the family.
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If you have any advice or suggestions, please feel free to review me. All flames will be ignored.
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