A/N- Hi! Hope everyone had a nice summer. Sorry I've been on hiatus for a while, but I'm back now, and school has started, so I'll be busy again! But anyway, I've written a little one-shot… it's quite sad, really, but please R&R read & review! Thanks :-) Promise
By The Silver Phoenix
Summary: It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love, especially when you know that that person might never come back again. But she gave him courage… and then she did what was right, because she loved him.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans.
He didn't have a choice, really. He had to go. Bruce had called for him, and he knew from the moment he received that message that he couldn't refuse it. This was his big chance to prove himself. The chance of a lifetime. And there was nothing stopping him from leaving now and never looking back.
Except… his friends. He couldn't tell them because they'd never let him go—especially not Starfire. They would never let him sacrifice himself, no matter how much good it brought to the people of Gotham. Because the truth of it was, he might never come back. Robin knew that perfectly well, of course; and he was prepared to face that. But the Teen Titans wouldn't accept it. That was why he had to steal away in the middle of the night on his R-Cycle, when the city was sleeping, so he'd be far away—too late for them to stop him—by the time everyone woke up.
Well, that had been the plan anyway.
As Robin stowed his briefcase away in the storage compartment of the R-Cycle, he turned around… and saw Starfire, standing in the dark doorway to the garage, her delicate features bathed in the pale moonlight that filtered through two small windows. So she found out… she'd guessed… He couldn't face her now. Robin stood with his back half-turned to her, and said nothing.
Starfire watched him for a few seconds, then broke the tense silence that hung between them. Stepping closer, she whispered, "Robin," her voice a sigh in the darkness. A voice he had come to love dearly, like the person it belonged to. A voice he might never hear again.
He said nothing.
She moved even closer to him still. "Robin, why must you go?"
"I have to, Starfire," he said awkwardly, turning to face her, but he kept his head bowed, as if in shame.
"I do not see the necessity," she retorted. "Besides, you will not come back," she accused.
"I'm coming back, I promise," he insisted, although his own voice sounded hollow even to himself. And, in a sudden, bold move, as if to prove the truth of his words, he leaned a little closer to her, and ever so gently, kissed her cheek. "I love you, Starfire," he whispered. "Always and forever. Promise me you won't ever forget that." They had actually already confessed their love for each other last year—but they had decided that a love like theirs would have to be a forbidden one, for as long as they remained superheroes. Now, however… there was no need to conceal their passion, for just these few moments.
As Robin's lips brushed gently against Starfire's skin, he realised, half astonished, that her cheek was wet with tears—tears unseen in the dimness. And then he looked up into her face, and saw that her eyes, red-rimmed with crying, were shining still with unshed tears, but were still blazing a bright emerald-green, brighter than he had ever seen them before. And Robin thought that he had never seen the Tamaranian princess look more beautiful than she did now, her sorrow painted so clearly on her proud, lovely face, yet with her eyes blazing with such fierce passion, gazing at him with such a smouldering look, that he knew instantly his heart was hers, and would remain hers, forever.
But he turned away. Robin knew that if he looked upon her adoring face again, if he gazed upon her flawless beauty a second longer, his self-control would surely snap, and he would surely give in to the temptations, the fiery passion that was aching to be satisfied. But he was on a mission—and Starfire was not part of the plan. He had to leave, before… before what? Before he broke her heart? But her heart had already shattered when she found out he was leaving…
Just then, Robin felt a warm hand on top of his glove. Starfire took his hand in hers, and placed her other hand on his cold cheek, and then moved her own face so close to his that he could feel her breathing, and he could smell the warm rose scent of her skin, the sweet fragrance of her hair. "I love you too, Robin," she said breathlessly, looking deep into his masked eyes, and in one swift movement she brought her lips to his, with all the urgency and passion of a first kiss. The Boy Wonder felt a fiery passion coursing fervently through his veins, and his whole body was on fire, as he returned her kiss eagerly. All of their passion, kept suppressed for two and a half years, was poured into a few seconds of pure bliss. It was as if someone was pouring all of the waters of the Pacific Ocean into a tiny cup; Robin felt like his heart was bursting and overflowing with love. Reacting on instinct, he brought his free hand to the back of Starfire's neck, feeling the silky crimson tresses cascade over his fingers.
Slowly, she pulled away, slightly reluctantly, and Robin slowly felt the warmth of her kiss ebbing away. He let his hands fall back to his sides as she stepped away. But the fiery passion that her kiss had ignited within his heart was still alight, a flame that would blaze until his dying day. He watched her reach for the motorcycle helmet that lay on the shelf, which she handed to him, silently.
And in that moment, a profound understanding passed between them, and he knew what she was doing. Robin realised, then, that Starfire was not stopping him from leaving—for, if that had been her intention, she would have accomplished it by now—indeed, she was here to say one final farewell, before he left. They say that if you love enough, you will be happy just to see them happy, he thought. But am I really happy?
"On my planet," the Tamaranian princess said quietly, "We believe that a person's life is governed by his or her destiny. Fate is the driving force in our lives. The stars we are born under determine everything—although the story of our lives was written long before we are born. Fate has brought us together, Robin, and if Fate separates us now, then so be it. I can only hope that she will be kind and return you to me, someday."
Robin thought he had never loved Starfire more, at that moment. She was being extremely brave, and he knew she'd want him to be brave—for both their sakes. Starfire flung herself at him, wrapping her arms firmly around him, and he responded by putting his arms around her, drawing her into a tight hug. It wasn't a lung-crushing hug, but a hug filled with friendly warmth, and the urgency to hold a loved one close for one last time. Starfire's tearstained cheek was buried in Robin's shoulder, and he felt her frail form shaking with sobs as he pulled her close to his heart, and he thought of everything she meant to him: she was his team-mate, his best friend in the whole world, the only girl he'd ever loved, and, he knew with a persistent certainty, the only one he could ever love.
Now, he was throwing all of that away. Was that what he really wanted? This was the perfect chance of a lifetime; surely this was what he'd always wanted? A small part of him wanted to stay with the girl of his dreams, to live happily ever after… but a louder voice in his head was telling him, Yes. It's what I've always wanted to do, since my parents died. I have to do this. Think of the shame that will haunt you for life if you don't go. If I make it home, I'll stay with Starfire forever. And if I don't make it back… then she will be proud of me.
Managing a clumsy smile, Robin took the helmet from her hands. He felt like someone receiving a coveted medal of honour or bravery from his Queen. For the first time since his parents' death, he found that he had to bite his lip hard to fight back the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. Starfire herself was crying freely.
Robin put the helmet on slowly, solemnly, and mounted his R-Cycle. He felt like a doomed soldier going to war. Part of him wished, foolishly, that she would come with him. But it was his duty to go alone, and he could only hope he would come back home again, one day, for he knew she would be waiting, night and day, until he returned. All Starfire had was a token of his promise that he would return; it was not much—a hasty kiss, a final embrace—but it meant all the world to her, for it was a token of his love. Starfire knew that as long as Robin lived, he would love her. And Robin knew that he had her love forever.
And that, for both of them, was more than enough.
"I hold it true, whatever befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
—Lord Alfred Tennyson
A/N- Well, how did you like it? Please, please, PLEASE review, people! What did you like & dislike? What score would you give the story out of 10 (10 being the best)? You know the rules—constructive criticism much appreciated, but no flames!
-The Silver Phoenix