Chapter Three: The Minx Hunt Begins
Hello my peoples! Sorry it took me so long to update! My school holidays started yesterday, so the updates should be more often. Fingers crossed. Anyways, back the dramatic life of Gee Gee…
Your lazy pal,
Stephanie Ridings.
Back in my room10:30 am
Ha! I think Dave the Laugh will think twice before publicly snogging me now. Especially when I already have a boyfriend.
Hang on. I'm not actually going out with Masimo, am I? In fact, he's probably out there snogging Wet Lindsay in some dark alleyway at this very moment! Erlack! I've just given myself a horrible mental image. I'll probably be scarred for life, now. And it's all Dave the Laugh's fault. I don't know how it's his fault, but I'll think of something.
10:40 am
I just sat on my bed, and I landed on something rotten. I have no idea what.
10:45 am
It may have been a potato at some stage, but I can't really tell. It's got an orange fuzz all over it. This really is a madhouse. Why couldn't I have a normal family, with normal sisters and –
The phone is ringing.
"Mutti!" I shouted down the stairs. "The phone to your house is ringing!"
I heard her giggle. It's not right that a woman of her years should giggle. "Georgia, darling, could you get that for me?" More giggling. "I'm a little busy right now."
Oh God. I really, really don't want to know what with.
10:50 am
Stomping downstairs to pick up the phone, and answer a call that will probably be for Mutti, anyway.
I picked up the receiver.
"Hello. Georgia of Loon Central speaking."
"Ah, Sex Kitty, this is Doctor Laugh calling."
I blinked. Why was Dave call now? I had been with him half an hour ago. Maybe he couldn't get enough of me. Ha! Revenge is sweet.
"Kitty Kat?" He was sounding a little worried. "Why aren't you saying anything?"
But I didn't get to answer, before he blurted, rather suddenly, "Why did you do that to me?" He sounded un-Dave the Laugh-ish again. Good grief.
"It was revenge," I said reasonably. "And revenge is a platter best served cold."
He laughed a short, un-laughing laugh. "Georgia, that was far from cold. That was hot."
How dare he say that!
"But I still don't get why you did it. Revenge, you say? Revenge for what? Whatever it is, I should definitely do it more often."
That made me laugh; he is so full of himself.
"You wish, Dave," I said (even though, honestly, I wished, too). "It was revenge for snogging me without permission and tutoring me in the ways of the Horn."
"Ah, I see…" There was a moment of silence. "So, what would you say it was? Cosmic, General or, dare I say, Particular Horn?" I could tell that if he were standing next to me, he would be looking at me in that looking-at-me way, which I hate. But when Dave does it, as I mentioned previously, it makes my red-bottom swell.
"Ha! Dream on, Dave!" I said. "It was just excess-snog energy. I needed to release it, and you provided a suitable outlet by –"
"Excess snog-energy?" Dave asked incredulously. "But isn't that the Horn?"
"Erm… it depends on how you look at it." I was so glad that Mutti and Vatti weren't here, listening to me.
"And looking at it from my point of view, as the helpless victim?"
"Helpless victim? You? Oh, you've got to be joking! You had me pressed up against the tree!" Dave was so ignorant. And frustrating. But a good nip-libbler.
"Then you slammed me up against said tree, which I think makes us about square, yes?"
"No way! I haven't nearly finished my revenge. I still haven't gotten you back for the fish-party incident. Or the time when you were wearing that red nose and you said you loved me. Or the time when –"
"I get the point, Georgia. You just want to snog me some more. I understand. You can't get enough of me."
"No!" He was being outrageous! This was my revenge!
"Then how are you going to get your revenge for the fish-party 'incident' as you so charmingly put it?"
"Well… I - I mean… I could just –"
"Yes? You could just what? You really ought to tell me, you know. Especially seeing as I'm the victim and all."
Maybe now would be a good time to just hang up? That's what I love about the telephone; you can end a conversation whenever you want to, and the other person is bound to get the hint.
But Dave says that boys don't take hints. He says that you have to be really obvious with them.
But what is really obvious? What did I want to say to him? Nothing. Ah well, I've always got my back-up plan.
"Can I eat your shirt?"
"What?" Ha ha! I bet that wasn't what he was expecting. "I can't believe you're using your back-up plan now. I thought it'd have to be a much harder question."
Bugger. He'd caught me out. Maybe this was time for the hang-up.
"Don't hang up on me, Georgia. I know where you live. I'll hunt you down."
Again! What was I supposed to do with that? Maybe I should just answer the question? But I don't have an answer.
"Then I guess you'll have to hunt me down then, Dave. Catch me if you can." And I hung up. He once told me that I'm supposed to play hard to get. I am going to turn everything he ever taught me against him. Let him suffer.
Sunday, 3rd AugustHanging with the Ace Gang
2:00 am
The Ace Gang is back! Yessss! And we're wondering the streets, nobody can stop us now! Yeeha! (I honestly have no idea where that came from. I don't want to be a cowgirl when I grow up, or anything.)
We where all sitting around a table in this new coffee place, all six of us, me, Mabs, Jools, Ellen, Jas and RoRo. The guy who was serving us was kind of hot (not Sex God material, of course), and we were trying to get Mabs to hook up with him.
"Look! There he is! He's at the front counter now," said Jools. "If I weren't with Rollo, I'd probably –"
"Go up there, Mabs," Rosie was the first to come up with a plan. "And ask for some more sugar or something."
"No!" she said. "We've got plenty here already, he'll see!"
"I can fix that," I said. I grabbed all of the little sugar packet things (there were about eight) and tore off all of their tops at the same time, pouring the lot into my cup.
"I don't think that was a very good idea, Gee Gee," said Ellen.
"And why not?"
"It's not going to dissolve. When a liquid reaches its saturation point, it –"
"Shut up, Ellen." I grabbed my spoon and started stirring frantically. I pushed all the empty sugar bags over to Jas so that she could hide them away. She seems very sad. I've no idea why. I haven't asked yet. I hope it's got nothing to do with Hunky. He only came back last night; they couldn't be fighting already.
When she saw the sugar packets, she just stared at them. You can't have a staring contest with sugar packets. They don't even stare back. Surely young Po knows that.
2:10 am
It turns out Ellen was right. Coffee has a saturation point. I mean, who would have thought of that? Coffee is a drinking thing. You're supposed to drink it, not saturate it, or whatever. Who knows what Ellen does in her free time. Who wants to know?
But I don't care, because I have huge lumps of sugar floating around at the bottom of my cup. As long as I remember not to drink it, I should be fine.
Ellen keeps giving me the I-told-you-so look, so I'm not talking to her now. I wonder if she found out about me snogging Dave when they were going out? Maybe that's why she's being so annoying.
2:15 am
Mabs has left upon operation 'get more sugar'. She's talking with Waiter Boy right now. She's gone all ditherspazzy, which is not a good look. She keeps sliding her foot around when she talks. It's really annoying. It's almost as bad as Jas's flicky fringe. But nothing is as bad as Jas's flicky fringe.
2:17 am
Mabs is still talking to the Waiter Boy. I wonder what their talking about?
2:20 am
Nothing interesting, I'd bet.
2:25 am
Good grief, he must really like her. I wonder if she has his number yet…
2:26 am
Ohmigodohmigodohmigod! Dave the Laugh just walked in! He's stalking me! He's hunting me down! Noooo!
With him was Tom, Rollo, Sven and another boy I'd never seen before. They were attacking us!
But this time, I was prepared. I was no longer wearing my telly tubby jim jams. Nope, this time I was all tarted up, complete with boy-entrancers and lippy. My defenses were up. Nobody could get to me now. Not even Dave the so-called Laugh. Let him try. Ha.
2:27 am
The lads walked over to us, Dave was looking extra groovy and Ellen went into ditherspaz mode, her hand fluttering madly about her mouth, as if it was a dying moth or something. Jas didn't even look up from her staring competition with the sugar packets.
When Dave got to us, he stood next to my chair, saying, "Hello, chicklettes, I see we meet again."
Jas looked up again, and when she saw Tom, she jumped out of her seat as if someone had electrocuted her (ouch) and threw her arms around Tom, and then snogged him. In public. With all us innocents watching. Some people are just so selfish. It looked like quite a violent snog, actually.
I tried to look away, but Dave was standing so close to me, I nearly stuck my head into his stomach. Which is not what you want. In fact, it was so not what I wanted, that I nearly fell out of my chair.
As I was straitening myself out again, Dave leant down and whispered in my ear, "Caught ya."
I glared up at him. "Not nearly, Dave," I whispered back. "You only just found me. I'm not yours yet."
"Ah, so I have to make you mine to do my part of the deal?" He was pretending to tie up the shoelace of his Convos. "I knew you wanted me."
"No!" I shouted. Everybody looked at me. Except for Rosie, who was sitting on Sven's lap.
"I know!" shouted Dave, standing up and waving his arms madly around. "And that's exactly what I said to him. I can't go around with a giant fish sticking out of my rucky! Imagine the questions people would ask!"
The Ace Gang went back to doing whatever it is they were doing. Dave was good at this cover-up business. Imagine if they'd heard what we were saying! Especially Ellen. Not that she seemed to care at the moment. She was chatting to that other lad that was with Dave the L..
Dave put his hand on my shoulder. "A word?" He jabbed his thumb over his shoulder at the front door. Imagine if somebody had been standing behind him. He could have poked them in the eye with a jab like that. "Please?"
Ah well, what was there to loose? I still needed revenge. I also happen to be vair vair mad about his 'so I have to make you mine' comment.
I stood up and stomped outside in what I hope was a very angry manner, despite my short skirt.
At the back of the coffee shop
In an alleyway
With the dustbins
Erlack
2:30 am
Ha. This looks like a suitable spot for the loud yelling that I had planned for him. It was an alleyway, and a bit grubby looking at that, but if I have learnt everything from Buddha, it is that you cannot have everything in life.
I turned around and saw Dave coming around the corner.
"That is not what I meant!" I shouted at him.
"About what?" Dave was eyeing the dustbins warily.
"I never mentioned anything about anybody making anybody else theirs! Or anything about a deal. I didn't hear myself mention a deal. Did you hear me mention a deal? Because I don't think I mentioned a –"
"Hey, Sex Kitty. You're babbling." He was leaning against the wall next to me, one foot up against the wall next to his knee, his head turned to face me.
"I am not babbling!" I said, walking over to stand in front of him. I knew my face had probably gone red, but I didn't care. I was in a dark alleyway, for the sake of Our Lord Sandra. How dare Dave be so calm, leaning against the wall in that calm way. Oh, I hate him, I hate him, I hate him.
Dave didn't say anything, he just looked at me in that ironic looking-at-me way.
It really was quite dark in the alleyway, and if it weren't for the dying light bulb above Dave's head, I probably couldn't see anything. But there was a dying light bulb above Dave's head, so I could see something. And that meant that I could see Dave. And Dave was looking almost Sex Goddish under that dying light bulb. Which was bad, because I want to hate him.
"Yes you are," said Dave.
"Am not!" I shouted back.
"Are to." Why wasn't he shouting. I was shouting. In fact, he was grinning at me. His Dave the Laugh grin. How are you supposed to restrain from snogging anybody if they keep grinning at you like that?
"I am not!"
"No, your not anymore. But you were." He crossed his arms in front of his chest. He is so annoying!
"I was not." I stomped my foot to make a point, which turned out to be a very stupid thing to do, as I was wearing high heels. My heel snapped off. That really was the last straw. I couldn't take it anymore. I sat down right where I was standing, in the middle of the alleyway. Another stupid move, as there was something soggy on the ground in the place I sat down. I stood up again, wiping my skirt frantically. I forgot that my heel was broken and tripped, landing on my ankle. That's the second time I've hurt that ankle. The first was when Wet Lindsay hit me with her hockey stick. Ow ow ow and also ow.
Ow.
I started hopping around frantically, looking just like a frantically hopping thing that hops frantically in a frantically hopping bar (i.e. a prat). Eventually my back hit the wall opposite Dave and I stopped hopping frantically to rest, holding my ankle.
Dave cleared his throat, and I realized that, because of the way I was holding my leg, he could see right up my skirt! I dropped my leg like it was a smoldering potato (i.e. a bit like a hot potato, only hotter).
"How dare you look up my skirt!" I shouted. I was mad, now. Not at anybody in particular, just mad in general.
"I guess I'm just the daring type," he said. Grinning again.
Uh oh. My anger was turning into snog energy. I thought I'd gotten rid of it all yesterday! This was really bad. I had to get away.
I tugged the edge of my skirt down, which didn't actually do anything. "Maybe we should go back in now."
"Why?" he said. "Don't you like it out here?" He waved his arms around dramatically, that stupid grin still on his face. "I love the whole grubby, dank and smelly feel of it. How can you not appreciate its obvious state of disrepair?"
"Only if you stop grinning," I said desperately.
"Why? Don't you like my smile?" He was still grinning.
"That's not the point!"
The next thing I knew he was attached to my lips.
After a few seconds of violent nip-libbling, he pulled back, saying, "Then what don't you like?"
Now would be a good time for the hang-up technique. But there was no phone. Hmph.
Ha ha! Now we have her! What should happen next? Should somebody walk around the corner mid-snog? Who should it be? I don't know, but you do. So REVIEW my friends! It's the little purple button at the bottom of the screen!
Your review-dependant buddy,
Stephanie Ridings.