Okay, this story is going to be kind of weird. Some chapters might be really short, and some might be longer, but I'll explain more at the end.
Danny Fenton sat on his front steps of his house reading a valentine and laughing his but off. The more he read the harder he laughed, and he managed to stop just as his friend Sam Manson walked up with something behind her back.
"Happy Valentines Day Danny!" she said. Sam noticed the valentine in Danny's hand and carefully hid a depressed look. Then she put whatever was behind her back into her pocket. "Who did you get a valentine from? Valerie?" She couldn't stop the scorn that came with that name.
"No, and what put you in such a bad mood? Oh that's right you hate human emotion and Valentines Day celebrates that. Here, read this, it should cheer you up. It worked for me." He handed the valentine to Sam.
My dearest Madeline,
Roses are red, my heart is blue,
Because I'm spending Valentine's Day without you,
When I see your smiling face,
My heart always beats faster by a pace,
So please leave Jack, come stay with me!
Because I so very much love thee.
Sincerely, Vladimir Masters.
"Isn't that the mushiest valentine you've read?" Danny asked.
Sam blushed embarrassedly. "Uh, sure. Why were you reading your mother's valentines anyway?"
Danny smirked. "I was expecting Vlad to send something like this. And look," He held up three more valentines in various shapes. "They're all from him just in case my mom didn't get the message the first time.
"You mean the fact that he loves her?" Sam asked.
"No, the message that Vlad is one seriously crazed up fruitloop. He's been after my mom ever since he first met her!" Sam almost said something as she remembered being in the same situation as Vlad.
"I bet he's lonely, all by himself in that big castle." She said after a long pause.
Danny laughed. "Then he should take my advice and get a cat. Sam, he's over forty years old! Don't you think it's time he moved on?"
"Maybe he's having trouble moving on, and he's just too proud to ask for help."
"Help…" Danny smirked evilly. "You're right Sam; we should help him move on to other women."
Sam was unnerved by Danny's grin. "I don't think I like the sound of this…"
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A few minutes later they were on Danny's computer. "Danny, I don't like where this is going." Sam said.
Danny only smiled. He opened up a paint program he had been working on and opened up a picture of Vlad that he had used in his ghost files. Then he erased the mouth and began working.
"What are you doing?" Sam said looking over Danny's shoulder.
Danny finished working on the picture, and it made Vlad look like someone had put his mouth on upside down when he was frowning… turning it into a weird sort of smile. "Everyone looks better when they smile." Danny told Sam. "And old cheese head is going to need a profile picture."
Sam gasped. "You're not honestly thinking what I think you're thinking."
"We'll see." was all that he said. Danny quickly saved the picture and logged on to the Internet. From there he typed in a website name. It'sCupidStupid .com. Sam said, "Now I know that you were doing what I thought you were doing. You can't give Vlad a profile on that thing!"
"Why not Sam? You said yourself that he needed help, and all of those Valentines prove it. A little romance will be good for the old V-man." He started typing.
After a few minutes he said, "There! The main profile's done."
"Wait, don't you need a validation email for these sorts of things? How did you get Vlad's?" Sam watched as Danny grinned.
"Sam, I don't think he would validate this do you? I used my own, that way we can monitor all of his dates, and see what kind of ladies he attracts."
"You're not regretting this one bit, are you." Sam said crossing her arms.
"Nope. Not in the slightest." Sam pushed him aside and read the profile. The screen name was 1crzdupFL
"Yeah that's going to bring in the dates." Sam said sarcastically. Danny said nothing and she continued to read.
The profile said, "Hi, I'm a 40 year old man who lives by himself in a big old castle. I like the Packers, hitting on other people's wives, plotting, trying to convince someone else's son to be mine, denying I want a cat, and the Packers. Sometimes I swear out loud, including words like Cheeselogs and Butter biscuits. I'm also crazy, although I never admit it when certain people tell me I am. My high points are the fact that I'm rich and not much else. My low points are everything else in this profile."
Sam glared at Danny. "Danny, that's not very nice. I know Vlad is your archenemy, but we are trying to help him."
Danny rolled his eyes. "Fine Sam. Move over."
Sam got out of his seat and Danny began to type again. This time the profile read:
"Hi, I'm a 40 year old man who lives by himself in a big old castle. I'm a Packers Fanatic, but I have no other real bad habits. I don't swear. Instead I say food names such as Cheeselogs and Butter biscuits. I am a multimillionaire. If you feel like dating me please contact me first."
"That's still not great, but it's definitely better than the last one." Sam said.
"Good, let's submit it." Danny said as he clicked the submit button. He turned around to face Sam.
"Anything else Cupid?" Sam said. Danny's smile was just as wicked as ever.
"Sam, Vlad is a halfa. Don't you think he should have ghostly dates along with human ones?"
"Danny…"
"Listen Sam, one quick trip into the ghost zone to see if they have a dating service or something. Maybe they even have the internet!" His blue eyes flashed green as thoughts of revenge on Vlad filled his head. This was going to be fun.
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As it turned out, ghosts were connected to the human internet. Danny asked around and found out that they more often then not simply use the same websites that humans used. Danny was extremely happy that it was so easy.
Sam and Danny went back to the Fenton house, and Danny instantly started up another account on This time the username was 1seriouslycrzdupFL. Danny didn't even bother to change the profile. He just used a picture of Vlad's ghost form instead of his human form.
Sam went home later and Danny passed the rest of the day chasing the Box Ghost. When he got home he went to bed he laid on it and said quietly, "Happy Valentines Day Vlad."
Okay, if you like it review, if not don't. One review will make the story continue, (or more of course. :) ) but none will make it come to a screeching halt. It'sCupidStupid .com is my own creation. Don't bother looking for it. You won't find Vlad on there. Okay, so all of the next chapters will be Vlad's dates, except maybe some of the second one because Danny and Sam need to look at all of the replies they get for Vlad…