jcbabygurl:Hello once more!Here is another (very,very,very,very)late installment!
Daisuke:(sweatdrop)she doesn't own Saiyuki or anything that mentions here
Yuna:let's see,the Goku-wanting-to-be-Kouryuu's-bride thing is from Flower Child,a ItaSasu doujin,everything else,she just made up from tv
Inuyasha:Gawd,let's just start already!
Warning:Bad metaphors and similes,not really suring if Television exists in the world of Saiyuki,another cup of a nosebleeding Kouryuu,roleplay,fluff,random shit and a Goku..COOKING?!(baaaaaaaaaad feeling,kewl,i made foreshadowing!shit,i just gave it away! . )
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Act seven:I want to be your wife!
"God,I had a really disturbing dream last night..."Kouryuu had this weird habit of thinking things of what happened yesturday,to insure he isn't suffering amensia,ever since one prank when he was eight,he has been doing so ever since..."Ah well,today should be the last day we stay her-",his happy thoughts of the morning was disturbed by a warm,soft something he's laying on.
"OH MY GOD!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"Next thing he knew,he swiftly,and gracelessy crawled away from what he was sleeping on all night to the hard surfaced wall to confirm information that he just slept on his "little" crush all night long."River rat!Shut up already!"Haru was beating the (poor and defenceless)wall with the broomstick that's been conviently sitting in his room all day."It's too early in the morning to hear your obvious billboarded hints that you like Goku!Do this later!"Doing so,he plopped himself back to his nice soft bed he had always missed sleeping in rather than what they slept back in the temple.Kouryuu,having blood rushing through his face,replyed through yelling at the top of his lungs"I DO NOT LIKE GOKU!!"The boy huffed out some anger out of his system,only to hear whimpering a few seconds later...
"Kouryuu doesn'tsnifflelike me..."Sadly,Goku woke up at the wrong time to hear just what his dear friend yelled.
Kouryuu,panicking at at the situation,flailed his arms around,sweatdropping,tried explaining what he meant,only making the situation worst.
Another fabulous day this will turn out to be...
It was a quiet peaceful day,two days before having to finally go back to studying in the temple,much like school except you have to do chores more often...after strangling a merchant since the last chapter,Kagura got a tv in the kitchen.Paying more attention to the show she's watching than the carrots she's chopping,she had five cuts on her hand today...
"YEOUWCH!"
Make that six...everybody else went bug hunting,except Kouryuu,he's sweeping outside,since he hates bugs ever since another incident some years ago that belonged to the so-called 'fellow' monks.Goku,which didn't like bugs right now,was sitting boredly on a chair watching a soap opera show which he didn't give a damn of what was going on opposed to Kagura that cares just every bit of detail of the story.Right now it's showing a scene where a man just got home from something I don't care about and a woman that just walked up to him and hugged the dude and I'm cutting off there cuz I hate soap operas and they're cheesy and stupid...sorry for those who likes it .
"Funato!No!Kaori is just fooling you again!Yes!That's it!Go home with your wife!"Kagura cried out,even though she's aware that she's talking to a tv...Goku,not knowing any shit about relationships and romance,replied with."WHAT IS THAT?!"Being scared and surprised so much,as if she would get a heartattack,Kagura accidentally made her...
"OWUCH!!"
"Ummm,I'll get more bandages..."
seventh cut today...
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A large yawn escaped through his lips.Holding the broom at the tip of the handle at one hand,and another hand on his waist."I'm going to kill Taro and Haru someday,they'll be by the gates of hell someday and shall be six-feet underground with a pickaxe through their heads before they can say "Shit. I have a pickaxe through my head."(I borrowed that line from D.A.R.E. to Feel Good from thy story,"Mishima Family Vaction" without permission!Sorry!!!)
"I'm going around town again since I feel like it!"Kouryuu called out.He heard a faint "okay",that was enough for him to go.
"Kouryuu!"Goku came running to him.Knowing Goku,he would ask if he could come."Sorry,I need time for myself"he replyed.Goku shook hid head in reply."That's not what I was going to say"Out of the blue,Warm lips made contact into Kouryuu's cheeck(if you guys though it was his lips,then quit being pervs,they only about my age . )."Be back safe"
Kagura was in the hallway,the part where she saw Goku kissing Kouryuu's cheeck."Wh-Goku!What are you doing?!"with her strength,she managed to yank Goku away from Kouryuu and kick him out of the house,Literally."Won't you give Kagu-neechan one?"
Kouryuu had his back against the wall of the house,beside the door of course,and traced up to wear Goku just kissed him."What just happened?"
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They were back at the temple,for their week was (finally) over."Riiver rat!get the groceries,and make sure you get it right this time"a monk hollared while he was just sitting under tree.The blonde just sneered at him before setting off."Kouryuu!"
"Sweet mother of god,not now"he thought.Goku came running up to him,like last time."Be back safe again"but this time,he was only grinning at him.Kouryuu looked both ways to see if anyone is looking."The coast is clear"he then leaned over,and left a light kiss on his(not on the lips people)forehead.Goku had a light blush that spread acrossed his face,Kouryuu had a darker blush,since he's the one kissing this time.It seemed like forever until...
"HA!I told you they were gay!You owe me 500,000 yen!"the sudden outburst came from the same monk that betted that they were gay.
Twitch
"yeah daisuke!you owe us all 500,000 yen!!!"more voices started buzzing through the air as more monks started charging into the poor victim for cash.
Twitch
"Me too!"a familiar voice joined the group of monks surrounding the poor monk in which was the only monk that betted them for them not to be gay."Master Sanzo!I did not know you too betted on this!"one of the monks said,buttering him up with sweet words,which of course never worked at the start."I couldn't help it"he chuckled as he placed his palm infront of the unfortunate,bankrupt monk."Pay up please"
Twitch
"Great,they betted on us...even Master Sanzo,has the world gone insane?"Kouryuu just froze there,trying to plot an evil plan into making them beg forgiveness,excluding master sanzo since he's his father figure.Goku waved his hand infront of his face,confused what the blonde is doing and how he is able to stand there that long."Kouryuu?Hello?Yah know,your face will stay like that if you keep it like that too long..."
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The apprentinces were outside in lessons about herbs,Kouryuu usually never pays attention to the only lesson that he stinks at,medical classes.So,he just stares at the sky,wondering what prank his fellow "apprentince friends"will do next.
"Now,you have twenty minutes to come back with one of any of the following"the monk who teaches medical holds up a scroll and settles in on a nearby rock."You may look at the list,if you paid attention in class,you would know where they are located,if you don't find any of the following,you can always recite them in ABC order holding a pole hanging on your shoulders,and if you get one wrong,we will add one bucket of water on each side each time you get it wrong."This was the reason why Kouryuu had a "If I were to kill anyone freely,who would I kill?"list with him on the top ten.He was always too damn strict when it came to studies."You may have up to one partner,and the twenty minutes start...now"by the time he said so,everybody started scrambling around the place for a partner fast and ran for a herb so they won't have to do that punishment.Kouryuu mentally curses at himself as these are one of the times that the monks will laugh at his suffering as he breaks his back so much until the teacher gets so annoyed,he gives up on him and he'll lock like the hunchback of notredame.He was about to go attempt to runaway from this lose-to-lose situation until a glimpse of hope just shined through as he spotted golden orbs staring at him and smiling innocently."saved.."he mentally sighed as he already knew that Goku wanted to be partnered up with him,why is he saved?Because,unlike the blonde future sanzo priest,Goku listens in class so he knows some of how the herbs look like in the list and where to find them in the area."C'mon,let's go!"before the ameyst eyed boy had time to react,the herectic took his hand and started dashing to the forest.
"Let's see,the alangium should be around here..."the blonde mumbled a few minutes of trying to find the herbs location.Right now,Kouryuu is looking for the plant that fits the description according to Goku's memory of the plant he chose to look for.Goku,on the other hand,was relaxing in a meadow of flowers,a meadow where the plant can be found.
"C'mon Goku,you gotta help me on this"
"Kouryuu?"
"hm?"
"I wanna be your wife,nee Kouryuu?"
"..."
The earth child turned to Kouryuu,only to find an empty spot that was once his location a few seconds ago."Awww,and I even did my best to confess..."
Behind a tree in the meadow,Kouryuu was blushing like a madman as heat covered his whole body."MUSTNOTTHINKPERVERTEDTHOUGHTS,MUSTNOTTHINKPERVERTEDTHOUGHTS,MUSTNOTTHINKPERVERTEDTHOUGHTS"as so far and so forth as he mumbled repeatedly.Of course,it hadn't really worked as he thought of he opposite of what he was chanting.For some reason,he mentally thought of Goku in an apron,with a ladle,with a bandana tied in his hair,that day,was the day Kouryuu actually hadn't nosebleed.Good job Kouryuu.
((-Kouryuu nosebleeds in a corner-nvm))
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"Let's see,apple pie...6 cups thinly sliced apples 3/4 cup white sugar -- to 1 cup 1 tablespoon butter or margarine 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon 1 recipe for 2 pie crusts...I already made the two pie crusts.."It was quite early in the morning and everybody was still asleep,except master sanzo,who checks over Goku every now and then to make sure he doesn't set the whole temple on fire.Goku,wanting to be a good little wife to Kouryuu,decides to bake pie.To where he got his idea of pie from,is from Kagura after the first incident before.
"So what'cha gonna bake him for,hm?"the older girl grinned in excitement."What do you mean by the Kagu-neechan?"Innocent eyes looked up at the girl as she squealed in delight.So she's a yaoi fangirl,aren't we?"You should cook something for him,what's his favorite fruit?"Goku pondered through his mind for the answer."I dunno,he doesn't talk about it...though he does eat apples a lot.."
"Try making him something with apples"
"An artwork that is made with apple slices?"
"Err,no..."
"An artwork made of apple sauce?"
"uhh..."
"An Artwork made of apple juice?"
"Errrr..."
"An Artwork made of apple seeds?"
"ummmmm..."
"An Artwork made of apple cores?"
"hmmmmm..."
"An artwork made of apple stems?"
"well..."
"An artwork made of apple pie?"
"That's it!"
"What's it Kagu nee-chan?"The boy,not realizing he just said the answer."Make him apple pie!"she squealed an image in her head,including Goku feeding and Kouryuu being fed,cute no?"But Kagu nee-chan.."Goku tugged onto her sleeve."Yes Goku-chan?"she asked."I don't know how to cook..."
"...bake him apple pie or face the wrath of my witts"Goku,not knowing what the word "witts"meaned,just nodded his head furiously and ran upstairs.He just didn't wanna find out what it mean't...
The heretic shuddered at the thought of Kagura's fury,so he kept working on the apple pie,at a much quicker pace as of though someone was watching over him and if he did'nt heed to their shouts,they'd whip him.Luckily,it was only a bug that only stared at him for a few seconds before flying away and get eaten by a bird.(poor bug)
All was going well for the young saru until,he started mixing...apparently,he was confused between the sugar and the salt,so instead of 3/4 white sugar,he placed 3/4 salt.He also had no idea what cinammon was,so he placed 1 teaspoon of dirt since it said "ground".Then came with the "thinly sliced apples"but instead of "thinly"sliced,they were BIG chunks of them.He also forgot to wash them..so they were kinds dirty..then he didn't know what butter is,and he knew what a migraine was so he added aspirin in there.Now,he hasn't really WATCHED Kagura cook when she made the pie crusts and only watched her get it out so he had no idea what he was doing.And since he could find the whisker,nor the big spoon,he got out the wok and started mixing,but since it was too big,he spinned it around,like how you would do to make clay round and long for a body of a snake.Yeah.he was doing the same action to the handle...Then he just did everything else correct and placed it in the oven and placed it in twenty-minutes.
Bored,he started 'roleplaying',with a frying wok on his head,and a broom in his hand,with lids tied around his body."I'm Gyumao!I will destroy you all!mwahahahahahahahaha!"he stated in a 'realistic'action.Then he ran to another area of the kitchen,this time with a strainer of his head instead of a frying wok."Not if I can help it!"then,he ran to the training grounds and woke up monks that were sleeping with all the pots and pans banging aganist eachother,but,since it was like...3:15 in the morning,they went back to sleep,knowing it's an hour and fifteen minutes too early...when he came back,he brought back the teacher's favorite training dummy,Shang.(this name is actually chinese this time 0)Goku then started dressing 'Shang' up with all the stuff he was wearing a few minutes ago.He turned to the timer to see that only fifteen minutes remained,he turned,and ran back to the spot he was before running out of the halls to get 'Shang'.He picked up the broom and started whacking Shang all over the place,as he whacked each area in place,a large 'BANG' was heard in each whack that rung in his ears,from the lids of course.
"Uhh,Goku?"
He frozed from his spot,and slowly turned his golden eyes to the source of the voice.There stood the reason why he's still up in the morning,rubbing his eyes with his white sleeve,having his violet eyes groggily looking at the weird sight of his object of affection,covered with lids tied together in the poorest excuse of armour,and a frying wok on his head,wielding the cook's favorite broom,which is now covered in scratches,and on the floor was 'Shang'sprawled onto the floor with the same looking riduculous 'armour'and a pot on the dummy's head.And on the tables and sink,was as if the blender gone out of control while drunk,if it could ever get drunk,or so,even exist right now.
"What're are you doing?"
"Uhhhhh,the dummy was possessed from an evil spirit???"which was his first,and only fib he could think up in his pretty little head."Do you want me to help you clean up?"he was almost awake,a little sleepy,and he just wanted to go to sleep,but if it concerned Goku,he's happy.The demon shook his head fast,the frying wok clattering down onto the floor thanks by gravity,and his hazel locks of hair whipping the blond boy's skin.
"You seriously need to cut your hair Goku...they really hurt..."Kouryuu muttered,nursing his skin better by rubbing it."but...but...my head will cut off!"he started whimpering,giving his puppy eyes he learned from Nagami when begging for chocolate from Haru."Must...resist...the cuteness..."Kouryuu was just not the type of guy to be manipulated by cute things,but Goku's eyes were just sooooo cute,you can't help be huggle him until it dies off,then you mourn over the one's death and mourn over it until you die yourself.(what a weird saying 0-o,then again,I always type weird)He tried shielding his eyes by having his right hand cover his face and shut his eyes(you know,like in Saiyuki Reload Gunlock,that episode when Hakkai runs off,in the beginning when Sanzo wakes up and spells the can all over his sanzo robes?Pretty much like that really...).Curious if Goku stopped,he opened one eye to observe the other in the same room.Unfortunately to his disadvantage,Goku's eyes started welling up with tears,looking look he was about to cry(really,he just pinched himself hard to make him sobbish looking),he looked liked a whipped puppy that's lost and in a sea of strangers.(Dear lord,I totally got that from "The Outsiders"...that's a good book -nods-)
"Fine,it'll stay long..."he sighed giving in finally."Yaaaay!"the smaller one's arms encircled the taller,and started hugging,and let the tears flow out of his tears,and of course,stain Kouryuu's robes.He pinched himself too hard."Are you crying Goku?"worry entered the blonde's voice."Yeah,but I pinched myself to look like I was about to cry"his voice was muffled into the taller's robes.The boy only sweatdropped,and sighed,"What am I going to do with you?"he returned the hug,resting his arms onto the smaller boy's shoulder."Better get some sleep before everybody wakes up,it's worst enough that they pester me for dozing off during medical class"he only felt a little movement on his chest,signaling it meant an "okay".He'd want to stay like this until he heard chuckling...
Sadly,it would've been better if they had their moment if they were still collecting herbs,because Goku completely forgot Master Sanzo was still monitering him for baking a pie and not the temple."Boys,boys,don't rush things so fast!"he chuckled again before tip-toeing to scout for awake monks that will complain for not trusting Goku enough to cook.Wait til the others take a gander at this...
Kouryuu,only felt heat covering his face once more,and ran to cover his nose with a tissue.Goku,only stood there confused,he turned to the timer still working,2 minutes until it's time to take it out.
"Nee,Kouryuu?"
He turned to Goku,waiting for his question to shoot at him again."Wanna try the apple pie I'm making?"The older boy's fingers pointed to the oven that was baking the pie,with 1 minute and 38 seconds to go.His only answer was a nod,for the fact that we was pressing the tissue onto his nasals,and his other hand pinching on the canal of his nose.
He started to take off the riduculous outfit and set them back to where they were supposed to be,forgetting to untie them.Then slipped on pot holders and sat next to Kouryuu,who was sitting on corner of the kitchen floor,blushing and silently wishing his Master to be sleeping like everybody else.He started to blush a little more when he felt contact gently brushing against him and when Goku's head rested on the taller's shoulder."I'm I a good wife to you Kouryuu?"shooting another question in his ears.Violet eyes looked at Goku,twiddling around his 'omgah!-it-just-so-happened-to-be-suddenly-and-awesomely'interesting cloth of his acolyte robes.(I always did that when I was younger during boring subjects,now I just draw crappy excuse for anime on my homework)."I think Kagura baa-chan forgetted to tell him one little detail,didn't she?".He mentally sighed to himself,wishing he could just beat some sense into the boy if it weren't for the fact that he was in fact,his 'object of affection'."Goku,you are only a wife once you are married to your spouse.."Goku's golden orbs looked directly at Kouryuu's."Really?I thought I was your wife if we were together for a while..."That earned a mental slap to himself to how idiotic Kagura is."No,no,no,no,that's called being 'best friends',wife is a term you used after being married..."Goku turned to the timer,it was already ringing."Ohhhhhh..."
Kouryuu silently missed the warm feeling from the other when he got up to get the baking pastry in the oven."Now that I think about,since WHEN did we get an oven?"he asked,pondering over his memories of when the oven suddenly appeared in the kitchen.Why,just yesturday it wasn't even there,just blank,empty,unused space...(That,evn I don't know...dude,I just type the stuff...)The other boy placed the pie on a table."I guess I made this pie for nothing then..."the other boy started rushing towards his cooking and started to cut out a piece."No,no,no,no,no,I'll eat it,it would be a shame to make it a waste."he said,taking a piece and then biting a piece out of it.
"Kouryuu?"
The blonde walked away from the kitchen as calmly as he could,when he was positively sure Goku wasn't following him out of sincerity,he started sprinting to the garden as fast as his legs could push him,his face in a sickly green color,and hastily ran behind the nearest bush.He felt his tastebuds literally burning of fire,and started throwing up the remains of the pie.
"Dear lord,it's like hell flavor baked inside,what the hell did Goku add in here?!"
was his last thoughts before he fainted from the horrible taste,missed out on five classes,had to face medical class,and still felt woozy the whole week from there and there on out,formed a fear of pie...
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It was night time,our four 'not-so-noble'heroes decided to camp out for the night in the forest.Hakuryu slept on Hakkai's sleeping bag,Hakkai was mixing the pot for the stew he's making,Gojyo was smoking,fully relaxing on some random log,Sanzo reading his issue of the newspaper,and Goku sat next to him boredly,pondering through memories."Hey Sanzo..."
The blonde monk looked at his saru,showing that he's acknowledging him."Remember that pie I baked ten years ago?"He asked,quietly chuckling at that memory.Sanzo,on the otherhand,just so suddenly froze and turned blue."Goku?"His golden orbs looked at him."Yeah?"
"What ever you do..."
"Yeah..."
"No matter what the cost.."
"uh-huh..."
"Never,I mean NEVER say the word 'pie'again near me,okay?"
"okay..."
"You guys!Stew's done!and look!I bought some pie from the 50 off sale at the morning market!There's as many pie flavors as you would like!there's cherry pie,blueberry pie,rasberry pie,blackberry pie,lemon pie,and then,the last but not least,the apple pie"heard from Hakkai,waving at the others with the cooked stew and packaged pie under the plates and utensils.From the word,Genjyo Sanzo,21st sucessor of the Makai tenjyo(and another one I cannot remember;;),has fallen of defeat of the painful memory that ever tasted in his tastebuds in his lifetime,fainted like a pansy as if he was knocked out by a baseball bat that directly smaked him in the forehead.
"The old bouzu just fainted like a wuss!This is pure blackmail!!"was what Gojyo had tried to say in his laughing fit."Was that pie really that bad?"Goku asked innocently.
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Deleted scene:
"I wonder where Kouryuu left off?"The only person left in the room dusted himself off after all the cooking,finally done cleaning up the once messy kitchen and took the pie that was now one-eighth missing a piece."Oh well,I guess he had to go tinkle."he quietly chuckled at the word 'tinkle'and placed his pie on the table before merrily walking away for some shut eye.
a few minutes later...
"Goku?Kouryuu?Are you guys done in the kitchen yet?"Koumoyou came walking into the kitchen,yawning,he eyed over the home-baked pastry sitting all alone on the table."I wonder if...nah,I guess he would mind if I take a slice.."He got the knife and placed the slice onto a plate.He took a bite and then...
THUMP!
The great Koumoyou Sanzo has fallen!Sprawled onto the floor,green faced,deliroiously,dizzy,mind-numbing unconscious!
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jcbabygurl:and there!finally updated!!!I'm sleepy,lazy,and lost a lot of brain cells from that math TAKS test!
inuyasha:quit whining!
jcbabygurl:oh sure,be mean to the person having a period .
inuyasha:-slowly backs away-
jcbabygurl:sorry if it still sucks ya' guys,I just wanted this updated,now,the lay on the couch dead again until I get another chapter idea before things finally get serious and not all friggin weird like it has in the previous chapters...
yuna:please R&R!