I do not own 'ER'...just borrow it's wonderful characters on occasion. Enjoy a different version of Baby Joe's beginnings. For Abby's POV of these events...read 'Postdiluvian' by Bel Vezer.

Abby had dozed off again but opened her eyes immediately when I opened the door to her room. Neela was right behind me with a wheelchair. Wordlessly I unfastened the catheter bag from the bed rail and laid it gently in her lap. I frowned when Abby picked it up and checked the out put.

"Stop treating yourself..." I scolded and she grinned. I contemplated how to do it without hurting her for a second and then she lifted her arms to my neck. She didn't make a sound as I lifted her carefully from the bed and settled her gently in the wheel chair. Neela slipped the catheter bag out of sight and then tucked the bed sheet blanket around Abby in the chair. She walked beside us as I pushed the wheelchair toward NICU. Abby's face was white and her eyes huge as we pushed the chair into the NICU 'box' and rolled the chair to the sink. I turned the water on and soaped up my hands and turned to her. I carefully rubbed her hands with soap, rinsed and dried them with paper towels. Neela helped her into a disposable gown and tucked it around her in the chair.

"Go and meet your son," she said quietly and stepped back. Abby nodded gratefully and waited while I put on a fresh gown and then wheeled her toward the incubator that held Josef. Dr. Raab was waiting for us there.

"Hello, Abby," she said with a smile. "I understand that there is a patient that you wanted to see?" I pushed her chair close to the incubator and then sat down in the rocker next to her. I gripped her hand and watched her as she studied our son for the very first time.

"He's so small..." she said finally.

"He's perfect," I said and kissed forehead. She drew her hand from mine and folded her arms across her chest and leaned in closer to the glass. I put a hand inside and rubbed the bottom of a tiny foot. Josef responded by curling his miniscule toes. I smiled and leaned my forehead against the glass. Abby listened wordlessly as Dr. Raab gave her a run down of Joe's condition. She asked a few questions and then leaned back in the chair carefully. Dr. Rabb studied Abby's face for a moment and then sighed.

'Well, I will leave you two alone with Joe for a while." And then she was gone. Abby glanced around NICU at the other babies and families and then back at me.

"He's too small, Luka," she said finally. I shook my head.

"He has everything," I said softly. "Ten fingers...ten toes...ears...nose...eyes..."

"A possible heart murmur...jaundice...a chance of cerebral palsy...apnea...if he lives." she added.

"He has a fighting chance." I said. "He has two parents who love him and will know how to take care of him. Right?" Her eyes met mine and she nodded slowly. We turned back to the incubator and she hugged her arms closer to her chest for a moment.

"I think I need to go back to my room now," she said quietly.

"Okay." I stood up and turned the wheelchair away. I glanced back at the incubator and leaned down to the opening and whispered to the baby inside.

"I know it's a bit early son," I said in soft Croatian. "But I am glad you are here." I rubbed the glass of the incubator and then wheeled Abby out of NICU and back to her room. She was silent as I smoothed the sheets and then carefully lifted her back into her bed. She watched me as I straightened the bed sheets around her and fastened the foley bag back on the bed rail.

"What happened to me, Luka?" she asked quietly. It was the question I was afraid of. The question that I had thought about how to answer and wasn't really prepared to. I took a deep breath and picked up her hand.

"You went into DIC...you were right about that," I said. She nodded slowly, her huge eyes never leaving my face. She looked so small...vulnerable...in that bed. I wasn't used to seeing her like that. Abby was tough.

"Janet had trouble getting the bleeding under control so she...uh...had to do a hysterectomy," I said finally. She frowned and her hand clenched mine tighter. "She had to remove your uterus but everything else is still in place. With your ovaries, you will still be able to nurse him." Abby's eyes closed and she turned her face away from me. She pulled her hand carefully from mine and slipped it under the sheets to feel the dressing that covered her belly. I put my hands on the sides of her face and turned it toward me. I kissed her closed eyes and her nose.

"I almost lost you again, Abby," I said softly as the realization suddenly set in for me. "This time it would have been forever. I almost lost you." She hesitated and then nodded slowly. Her eyes opened and she looked into mine. Her lips quivered and then she reached up and caressed my cheek. I buried my face against the curve of her neck and began to cry. I wrapped my arms around her and held her as all the pent up feelings began to overwhelm me. All the feelings and fears and frustrations from the past hours...the sense of loss...the joy of seeing our son... frightened as he struggled to breathe and to live...seeing her blood flowing everywhere ...white faced and in pain...trapped on that gurney myself as I knew what was happening...feeling like I was going to lose them both...knowing that I would want my own life to be over if that happened...again.

"It's okay, Luka," she whispered in my ear. "It's really okay." I pulled back and was lost in the brown eyes that held mine. Beautiful eyes that I loved so very much. She smiled slightly and kissed me softly.

"I think I want to go back to sleep for a little while," she said as her fingers gently wiped away the tears on my face. I nodded and leaned in to kiss her.

"I need to go check on things in the ER," I said. "But I will be back soon." She nodded and sighed as she closed her eyes and relaxed. As I reached for the chain that controlled the light over her bed, her eyes opened again.

"Luka..." she said. I stopped and smiled.

"Right here." Her eyes searched mine in a panic and then she took a deep breath.

"I need a breast pump," she said quietly. "Can you tell them that for me?" My grin broadened and I kissed her carefully again.

"I'll tell them before I leave," I whispered. She blushed a bit as she studied my face, smiled and then sighed as her eyes drooped shut. I watched as she slipped back into an exhausted sleep. I reached up, again, to switch off the glaring light over the bed and left the room.