Dear Diary,

I am a changed woman man thing! Tohshroom has shown me the error of my ways using her kind words and oversized tears. Even as I was attempting to give the little hussy a bald spot, she continued to say how she'd miss me when I died, and that so would everyone else. It was truly a touching scene.

My favorite part was punching Yuki and Shigure. I hope they get big fat bruises on their girly chests; they rumpled my favorite kimono. POUT.

In all honesty though, nothing has really changed, except that the tramp is probably going to stick around forever now. Geez. But...she is growing on me. Like how a fungus grows on the side of a magnificent tree...or how a tape worm grows in the intestines.

On another weird note, I noticed that Yuki left his lip gloss; probably dropped it in his rush to glomp me the perv. And, after slathering it all over my luscious lips, I headed out to give it to him....and they were all moving in slow motion. Let me repeat this; they, the freaks that just ruined my day, were moving in slow motion, like in the matrix.

..........it was one of the weirdest things I've ever seen. And then they just froze in place! I mean, what the heck?! So I just backed up slowly and closed the door.

Still have the lip gloss. It tastes like cherries and homoerotic tension, which, by the way, makes my lips tingle.

Hm...something feels very final about this. Almost as if it's the last episode in a series or something. How depressing. I should probably go on my LiveJournal and complain about it and wait for people to comment on how I'm totally sweet and wonderful and then they'll give me cyber hugs then never talk to me again. It'll be AWESOME.

Well my darling diary, this may be the end of our epic adventures together. You've been here for me through Tootyfruity's first appearance, the girl rumors, the weird cat eating lady, my realization that I WAS a girl, and now this...whatever the crap this is. Perhaps someday I shall return and write more of my thoughts and adventures within your pages. But for now, I am going to retire to causing drama, making others uncomfortable, and playing the newest Poke'mon game. I just gotta catch 'em all. Adieu, my dear diary. Adieu.

Sure hope this doesn't end up on the internet.

-The Head of the Sohma Family: Akito Sohma-