A/N: The awsome team of Goldy and Wolfy is back! In an action packed new chapter of this FICTION! Ok, maybe not 'action packed' but trust me...it's funny. Hope you all enjoy!

"Cannibalism," Doctor Temperance Brennan said as her and her partner got out of the FBI issued black SUV.

"Do I even want to know," Agent Seeley Booth questioned, pulling his coat close against the cold Sierra Nevada mountain air.

"The Donner party was heading to California when they took part in cannibalism after a record snow fall trapped them here in this pass," Brennan explained in a voice that said she had figured everybody knew that piece of history.

"Yeah, okay Bones, I know who the Donners are. They had their little party out here, served finger foods, that sort of thing. What does that have to do with the remains we're here to look at?"

"That was in bad taste Booth, finger foods..." Brennan shook her head as the pair headed down a trail to the crime scene. Booth just rolled his eyes.

"Oh, so now you're going to give me the cold shoulder?"

"You don't think it's odd that remains just suddenly appeared under the plaque on the Donner monument?"

"What I think is weird," Booth commented, "is that people can eat another person."

"Perfectly normal. Evidence has even been found in Chaco Canyon."

"In where?" Booth asked. "Never mind. The point is that it's wrong."

"Booth, just because we have a set of mores that make the devouring of human flesh a taboo does not mean that other cultures share that point of view. Besides, until you're in a situation where consuming flesh is your only option, you can spout whatever you want. The Aztecs believed that by eating the eyes of their enemy, they could absorb their power and knowledge."

"Look, all I'm saying is that if someone wants to turn me into a rump roast or an open faced sandwich, I'd put up a fight, okay?"

"Well, don't you eat the flesh of Jesus during Communion?"

"Hey," Booth said, stopping in his tracks. "What have I told you about leaving Jesus out of it?"

"I'm just saying."

"Just," Booth interrupted. "Just get the Squints on the line."

"Booth, you've got to learn to have an objective conversation without getting so offended," she responded as she pulled out her cell phone. Brennan dialed the Jeffersonian, putting the call on speaker phone once the line was picked up. "Your church believes that they are devouring the flesh and blood of Jesus Christ whenever they have communion. How is that any different than a culture consuming actual flesh?"

"Bren, are you attacking Booth's beliefs again?"

"See?" Booth said. "Angela gets it."

"What I get," the artist said, "is that a pissy Booth is never a good thing."

"Why are we talking about Jesus anyhow?" Cam asked.

"Because we're talking about cannibalism," Brennan explained.

"Cool," Hodgins answered excitedly.

"Cool, nothing," Angela said. "It's creepy."

"Exactly," Booth responded. Brennan sent him a disgruntled look as she stepped under the police caution line Booth lifted for her. "It's creepy, and Catholics are not cannibals."

"Can we get on topic please," Cam asked of the group. Booth looked at the remains laid out underneath an enormous rock with a plaque on it. The remains looked to have been chewed on by something.

"We were merely discussing the fact that it's somewhat ironic that human remains were discovered at the site of the Donner party tragedy," Brennan said as she started her examination.

"How would you figure out who to eat?" Hodgins suddenly asked, earning him a death glare from Angela.

"I would guess whoever was the sickest," Cam answered off handedly.

"But what if no one was sick?"

"The weakest," Brennan answered.

"Are we actually discussing this," Booth asked, looking around to see whether or not any of the state troopers at the scene were listening in.

"But if it was the weakest, then wouldn't they be a bit I don't know....stringy," Angela asked.

"The weakest person does not necessarily mean less body fat. In actuality, you'd want at least a ten percent fat content to make the flesh more palatable."

"Palatable?" Booth repeated.

"Yes," Brennan replied. "Palatable. Which means that you don't have anything to worry about Booth. You would be least likely to be eaten."

"I feel better about that I guess. But if it's a low fat count then how would you be any less tasty than me? You're so thin."

"Thin?" Brennan questioned. "I'm far from thin and you would have to take into account breasts. Making Cam, Angela or myself a good candidate."

"I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with Booth thinking about my breasts," Angela put in.

"Would you rather him think about pie," Hodgins asked, making Booth groan.

"Oh, Booth likes pie," Brennan said, finally able to contribute. "His favorite is cherry pie."

"Sweetie, that's not exactly the type of pie that Hodgins was referring to." Brennan scrunched up her face as she thought about the question.

"Then are you more comfortable with him thinking about pie than breasts?"

"No sweetie, that's not why it makes me uncomfortable," Angela responded. After a brief pause, she began to speak again. "So Booth, who would you eat? Which one of us would be a tasty treat to you?"

Booth sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Can we please just, you know, look at the body?"

"Sure, but that doesn't answer the question," Brennan said, turning her attention to the remains.

"Yeah, Booth," Cam piped in, her voice dripping with half-hidden laughter. "Who would you eat?"

"Well since he's already had Cam that would leave....Ow!" Hodgins never finished the sentence as the resounding smack of Cam's hand to the back of his head sounded over the phone line.

"Pushing the line there Dr. Hodgins."

"I don't see how Booth having a sexual relationship with Cam has anything to do with whom he who eat, or pie for that matter," Brennan said, confusion on her face.

"What he meant, sweetie," Angela began and then thought better of it. "Forget it."

"Did I miss something?" the doctor asked, looking at Booth.

"You missed that it looks like the remains have been burned," Booth pointed out.

"I didn't miss it, I just haven't pointed it out yet."

"Wait," Hodgins interrupted. "The body has been burned? Like roasted?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well maybe they were planning to have baby back ribs, or a weenie roast with toasted buns."

"That's it," Booth said, throwing his hands in the air. "Just text me when you're done." With that he walked away, leaving his partner looking after him.

Later, when the remains were examined and packed for transport, Brennan rejoined Booth at the SUV where he stood bundled against the wind and a petulant look on his face. Neither said a word as they got in the vehicle and headed back toward Reno and their much warmer hotel. As they drove, Brennan turned to look at her partner, a question burning across her mind. After being stared at for over a minute, Booth finally turned to look at Temperance.

"What?"

"So who would you eat?"

XxXxX

Cullen looked at the agent sitting in front of him, a bandage over his left eye and one arm in a sling.

"So that's how my car got wrapped around the tree."

"Ah, well that's... unfortunate Agent Booth. Dr. Brennan is okay I hope."

"Yes, sir, she's fine. Just a small cut."

"You know, Agent Booth, that is an interesting story, but are you sure that's your official statement?"

Booth thought for a moment and then replied, "this large as a cat squirrel ran right out in front of me."

"That's what I thought," Cullen answered. "You may go." Booth stood, gave a nod to his boss and started toward the door.

As his hand touched the knob he heard Cullen ask, "So...who would you eat?" A loud groan filled the office as Booth left the room, shutting the door behind him.