This is the result of a comic that was making fun of Yu-gi-oh, since a card game does determine the 'fate of the world'. The joke was that it was a surprise any government would allow the game to be played, or at least not call in air strikes every time it is played. And so, an idea was born…

Brief Interviews with Best Friends
To: The Federal Bureau of Investigation
From: Office of Naval Intelligence
Re: Yuugi Mutou Interviews Enclosed

Sirs, I'll make this brief. All transcripts of the interviews are attached, but the Office of Naval Intelligence has determined these children pose no threat to national security or will hurt our relations with the nation of Japan. The children have since been released from our custody and have settled under the protection of Seto Kaiba, head of the international company Kaiba Corporations and will return to Japan soon.

Attachment: Transcript

0500 Hours, August 11, 1998
USS Autumn, Office of Naval Intelligence
Atlantic Ocean off the coast of New York
Re: Katsuya Jounouchi, Age 17

Q: How long have you known Yuugi Mutou?

Ummm…I'm not really sure. He's been in my class since junior high, so…almost six years? Yeah, almost six years.

Q: What would you say your relationship is with him?

Uh? Oh, oh, you mean 'friendship'! Sorry, your translator said something else…but, we're best friends! Yup! Me an' Yuug'! Team Jounouchi, us! Okay, maybe team Yuug', but that's us! Yeah…hey, do you have anything to eat? I'm starving.

Q: What are Yuugi Mutou's interests? What does he like to do?

Ha! Girls and games. And I have every reason to believe it ain't in that order, but he loves 'em both though, I'll tell you that much. And he's a genius at games, never lost one! Ever! But he's not so much a genius at girls, though they all think he's cute. I never really understood that, but my friend Mai said it was because he was 'sweet, innocent, and fun to make blush'. I never told her Yuug's anything but innocent, heh heh, if you know what I mean…

Sorry.

Q. How would you describe Yuugi Mutou?

Err…kind of quiet, I guess. Always kind of keeps to himself. Calm. Which I suppose is good, because we've all had a rough year lately. With everything so hectic, it's kind of nice to know Yuug' is always there, and not panicking with the rest of us. Just don't piss him off, because well…he can get kind of…mean. No, no, not evil. Just…yeah, don't piss him off. And, please, do NOT challenge him to a game when he's pissed. This is good advice, buddy, so write that down too.

By the way, can I have another sandwich?

Q: How did you two become friends?

Heh heh, well, you see, that's a long, long story. Well, yeah, I know we have all day, but the details aren't important! We're friends now, that's all that matters. Best friends! Yuug' and me are going to be best friends forever, too! Come on, next question!

(0515 Hours, August 11, 1998)

Okay, okay, okay! Alright, fine. Me an' my friend Honda used to…bully Yuug' a lot. He was the weird kid in class, the short guy, and he always sat in the back of class playing with little games instead of talkin' with anyone. It was weird, y'know? And I always thought he was a wimp and no one ever really paid him any attention but Anzu.

When I noticed him talking to Anzu one day, he had this box. Well, not a box…maybe a chest? Anyway, it looked like real gold, had a funky eye on it and those little funky Egyptian drawings on it. Whaddya' call 'em? Right, right, hieroglyphics. So, he's talking to Anzu, and since I'm kinda intrigued by the box, I get Honda with me to walk over to him.

You really don't need to know all the details, but I took the box, and when Yuug' begged to have it back, his treasure, I got kind of annoyed. What guys begs for anything? So, I told Yuug' I was goin' to teach how to be a man! Kind of…kind of how I thought I was at the time. And I gave Yuug' back his box, but not after I got a peek inside. There was all these puzzle pieces inside, and I remember thinking how could this be anyone's treasure? But, it was a gold color, and I took one piece before giving it back to Yuug'. Showed it to Honda, and we both determined it wasn't real gold, and chucked it into the pool.

Yeah, yeah, I know I'm an awful person. The worst part was I don't think Yuug' ever knew. I never told him, and I'm sure Honda hasn't either, but do you want to know the truly awful part of all this? Despite how we treated him, Yuug' went out of his way to stop another bully, Hall Monitor Ushio, from beating me an' Honda up! Can you believe it? At first, I thought Yuugi got the guy to come after us, and damn, did it hurt, but then he runs up, five foot against this guy who's like monstrously huge and bordering six feet, and yells, "They were just trying to teach me to be a man!"

And, god, the guy beat the shit out of him. Pardon my language, but he did. And I swear, Yuug' never made a sound. Not once. And he was beaten up pretty badly, all for Honda an' me. Can you believe that? Would you protect the two people who bully you?

Anyway, I felt awful, afterwards, and I…went and got his puzzle piece from the bottom of the pool. Couldn't face him, though, so I gave it to his grandfather…Spent the night wallowing around on my bed, wondering how the hell I was going to say 'thanks' to Yuug'. And how I was going to tell him I didn't mind bein' his friend. Finally, I figured it out. I knew Yuug' liked games, so I made up a riddle for him to solve!

Things that we can see but we can't see! See, it's a riddle! Can you guess what it is?

Okay, okay! It's friendship. Geez.

But, me and Yuug' have been best friends ever since! Team Yuug'!

Q: Tell us about Duel Monsters. What is it?

It's a card game.

Q: Is that all?

It's…a really good card game?

/END TRANSCRIPT/