Rated: PG-13
Language: English
Categories: Humor/None
Title: Kyo the Temporary Store Dummy
Summary: AyaRit. Ayame has designed a few dresses for Ritsu. The only problem is he needs someone to try them on for him. With Kyo the only one present close to Ritsu's size, he's been volunteered as the dummy...Maybe they should've gotten Yuki to be the test rat instead.

Kyo the Temporary Store Dummy

---

Roy made me try on a couple of the dresses my sister was lending him for a date a couple of weeks ago before he'd wear them since they're about the same size. Roy acts exactly like Ritsu and the funny thing is he didn't even know who Ritsu was until I showed him. Riley, meanwhile, acts like Shigure while I (at the moment) was in the mood set of Kyo. I did not want to try on those dang dresses. I'm much taller than him and I really am bigger around the middle than Roy is! Although Ayame's dating Ritsu in this fic, my sister Danie was acting the part of him. Also, I'm not good with French at all so I'm hoping the one phrase I used was correct.

With a window broken, dresses thrown all over the place, and sewing materials scattered on the ground almost everywhere, Ayame's shop was an absolute mess.

"I've got you now!" laughed Aya, arms gripping Kyo firmly about the waist from behind as the cat thrashed violently for freedom.

"I'M NOT DOIN' IT, DAMN YOU!" Kyo snarled, struggling more fiercely than before and clawing at the counter where Mine sat giggling behind her palm like a mad woman.

"Oh, please do it, Kyo! It would mean everything to us and, besides, you're the only other one around here that's anywhere close to my dear Monkey-san's size!"

"I don't give a damn, ya stupid snake, I'm not doin' it!"

Ayame paused, eyes closing behind long lashes as he thought quietly for a moment. Just when Kyo was beginning to suspect that the silver-haired man had given up and was about to release him, Aya whispered into his ear, "Please don't force me to call up Yuki to force you to cooperate."

Kyo froze. "But he's sleepin'!"

Giving the teen a mischievous smile, Aya replied, "I know. And my dear little brother is so much stronger when half asleep, and will not appreciate being woken up because you won't cooperate."

"Fine, fine! I'll try on the damn dresses! But nobody better find out about this or so help me, I'll get Tohru to hug you and then I'll cook you alive!"

Ayame let out an audible gasp at this. "You would never!"

"Try me! I heard people in America like eatin' snake!"

"Yes well dear Kyo don't forget that cat is quite a delectable treat to some countries as well. I believe your dear Haru agrees?"

A few minutes later...

Kyo stood facing a mirror, eyes wide and his jaw dropped as far as it was possible to go, staring at the image of himself in the dress looking back at him. The low-cut v neck of the autumn brown dress gave a teasing view of his flat chest but clung tightly to his form, no sleeves sewn on but that were, instead, replaced with spaghetti straps which were made to intentionally fall from the shoulders. What mostly caught his attention was the annoying lack of fabric used in its making. For crying out loud, the bottom hem of the dress came up to roughly six inches above the knee, maybe six and a half.

Turning around to face the three spectators, he could see Ritsu staring levely at his legs with his face bright red. Apparently he had the same opinion of its lack of fabric as Kyo himself did, while Mine stood in the background with her hands clasped at her lap, looking to the ceiling innocently. A blush adorned her face as well, but he had a feeling it was more because she had something to do with the making of the dress than the shortness of it. Ayame, however,–

"Why that suits you perfectly Kyo!" Aya cried happily, grinning, hands on his hips as he proudly inspected the dress.

Kyo sighed to himself. "Good. Then I can take this thing off and get back into my clothes." he muttered, beginning to pull the dress off and reaching for his own clothes.

Quickly the yellow-eyed man extended one arm and grasped Kyo's wrist gently within his hand. Moving it away from the pile of clothes, he cooed, "Oh, but that would never work for my dear Ritschan-san! You simply MUST try the other on as well."

Kyo stared at him blankly before asking in a deadpan voice, "...Why don't you make HIM try it on? For God sakes I'M BIGGER AROUND THAN HIM!"

"Ah but our dear Monkey-san doesn't feel comfortable enough to try them on in front of us!"

"...SO SEND HIM TO A DAMN DRESSING ROOM, YA DAMN SNAKE!"

"But this way we can see how it looks and, me being excellent with judging sizes and colours of dresses on others, I can judge whether or not it would look good enough on him! Besides..." Aya wound one arm around the monkey's waist possessively, hand resting on Ritsu's hip gently. "You know how he dislikes being subjected to the possibility of looking badly to others." He looked down to his lover, rubbing their noses together. "As if it were ever possible for him to look bad in anything!"

Ritsu flushed brightly as he turned to face Kyo again, tapping the edgesof his pointer fingers together nervously. "I'm sorry! If- if this is too much trouble for you, please, don't do it on my account...I don't want to be anymore of a burden than I already am!"

Peeking up from behind Ayame's shoulder, Shigure smiled with his eyes closed as he held up one finger and said in a sing-song voice, "You're always a burden! And, Kyo, I didn't know you were the receiver in your relationship! Although with such a violent partner I should have known-"

Kyo shouted, fists shaking, "WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM, YA DAMN MUTT!"

"Mine let me in, and- oh, dear. Now, Kyo, you mustn't hit your elders!"

Shigure zipped off, followed closely by Kyo, leaving Ritsu and Ayame to watch as they raced around the shop in a dangerous game of Tag You're Dead while Mine sweatdropped at the sight.

A few minutes later, more of the shop was in ruins and there wasn't a single window left unbroken. Shigure had disappeared out the door for his own safety with the help of Ritsu while Kyo was tearing at a dressing room stall to get in and see if the older Sohma was hiding inside.

"Damn Shigure! What the hell was he doin' here anyway?"

"I'm not sure, but perhaps it had to do with your being late for work today? You know, being late your second day isn't a good idea. It certainly isn't a good way to start off!"

"Damnit they're gonna fire me!" Kyo cried, pointing an accusing finger at the clock. "I'M SO LATE!"

"Now, now, Kyo-Kyo! Let's not jump to conclusions. I shall simply use my charisma to make them understand your tardiness and your job will be safe. It's the very least that I can do!"

"I- I can help, too!" Ritsu chimed in timidly, forcing himself to smile through his nervousness.

"Ah! My dear Monkey-san, you're becoming more like me every day! You've become much more confident in yourself, mon cheri!"

"I guess I owe you a thank you then.." Kyo mumbled, glaring down at the floor.

"Not at all, Kyon-kichi! After all," Aya replied, placing one hand on Kyo's shoulder as he held out a piece of paper with numbers and a few words scrawled on it in his handwriting, "If you don't have a job how else shall you pay for the repairs needed to my shop because of your rampages?"
-End-