a/n: its a complete fluke that the abbreviated form of this fic is LSD but I found it amusing anyway
Lazy Summer days
"Mmm"
"Yeah"
"Double mmm"
"What he said"
"Moony, you make excellent strawberry daiquiris. Ever considered a career as a bartender? I hear the Hogs Head is hiring," said Sirius languidly from his lawn chair.
"I'd rather not, my passion lays with cooking," replies Remus
"You're cooking tonight then, last night was a disaster. I still can't believe James set the kitchen on fire while washing the dishes," stated Sirius.
"Yeah…that surprised even me, I didn't think it was possible. But then again that's me, always doing the impossible" mumbles James.
"Now remind me why we're sun tanning like teenage girls?" questioned Sirius.
"'Cos we're all as white as sheep and you know that" retorted James
"But were the Speedos really necessary?" said Remus unconvinced.
"Do you really want a farmer's tan? Those are so messed up. Plus, we have nothing better to do," piped up Peter from his lawn chair.
"Well we could be swimming in the pool instead of sitting by it like nancy boys," complained Sirius.
"I feel like a slow roasting turkey," said Remus
"And you smell like one too, now turn over its time to tan the back," replied James
Oh, they complained, but they complied.
The four sixth year boys who normally call themselves the marauders, who were known for being mischievious, handsome, clever boys were indeed sun tanning. They were all spending two weeks at the Potter's house. James' parents were on vacation in Switzerland, or was it France? Frankly, no one remembers. It might have been Belgium actually. You should ask James.
The four boys had to fend for themselves. Cooking, not getting arrested, keeping themselves entertained, trying not to destroy the house and keeping it remotely clean. Well no, not that last one, although Remus would wish it were otherwise.
Suddenly, a shrill scream was heard that seemed to go on….and on and on. Seriously
"Peter, shut up!" Sirius said as he threw a foam pool toy at the offending blonde boy
"I'm melting! AAAHHH! It burns!" said Peter as he hopped up from his chair and was jumping about trying to fend off the sun's rays.
"You didn't put sunscreen on your back you tit!" laughed Sirius, pulling up his sunglasses to get a better view of Peter's misery.
"I am NOT a breast accessory!" yelled Peter in between his jumping about.
"Hah, an accessory? It's much more than that Pete, now get inside and put a t-shirt on. You skin looks like its bubbling," added James.
Peter runs into the house still screaming. A couple more minutes passed in silence.
"Y'know, I'm bronzing rather nicely. I'm going to look like some kind of…bronze god," said Sirius as he was admiring his new tan.
"Pah!" exclaimed Remus as he looked as his tan, "You always get everything done right. Look at me, I'm turning red! I look like a lobster!"
"Life sucks and then you die Moony, get over it. You look fine to me, although your nose suddenly looks abnormally large" chimed in James.
"My nose? What's wrong with my nose?" exclaimed Remus, feeling his nose up self-consciously, "It's always been this size!"
"Oh…well then, my mistake," answered James.
"I can't believe this! My nose IS abnormally large!" exclaimed Remus yet again. He seems to be exclaiming a lot, it must be because he's a lobster, I mean, 'werewolf'.
"Don't worry Moony, Prongsie here is just being an idiot. Your lobster nose looks fine to me" chuckled Sirius knowing this was the wrong thing to say.
"You two are such gits, why do I even bother with the two of you?" replied Remus annoyed.
"'Cos you looooove us, and you have to cook for us or we wont survive?" questioned James lightly.
Remus narrowed his eyes at them in this evil glare that he thinks is menacing but just sets his mates off into fits of laughter.
"Oh stuff it, and let me tan red in peace," mumbled Remus and sets about trying to ignore his friends
"Pads'?" calls James quietly over Remus' head
"Yeah, mate?" replies Sirius just as quietly looking over at James over Remus' head
After which James mimes throwing their sulking friend into the pool to which Sirius quickly agrees. They get up out of their lawn chairs and sneak up to Remus who is turned on his stomach and doesn't see them coming.
They look at each other over Remus' head (they seem to be doing a whole lot over his head), grin like maniacs and pick Remus up chair and all and throwing him into the pool. A small squawk is heard from Remus before he hits the water and then all sound is lost and he is submerged.
The chair floats to the surface and bobs silently but Remus doesn't come up. James and Sirius look at each other worriedly. They can see their friend stuck at the bottom of the pool and get more and more worried. James finally decides to dive in and help.
Underwater James makes his way to Remus, he couldn't miss him really, the red beacon that he was and the only thing in the pool. When he gets to Remus he discovers that his lobster friend has got his Speedo stuck on the drain, somehow. Trying to hold his grin back James pulls Remus free and pulls him to the surface with him.
They both emerge gasping for air with Sirius looking on, holding towels out for the two of them.
"You idiots almost killed me with your larking about…again!" sputtered a very annoyed Remus.
"Look Moony, we're sorry! We never try to kill you on purpose, really!" James offered a smile.
"But it happens anyway! When I couldn't get my damn Speedo off that drain I thought I was a goner and that my last words had been 'let me tan in peace'" glared Remus.
Sirius couldn't help laughing.
"You're Speedo was stuck on the drain?" he got out between guffaws. James started a slow smile but stopped when he saw Remus huffily pull himself out of the pool and into the house, slamming the door.
"Oh bugger, he's going to get wet marks all over the place until he finds himself a towel," complained James, still in the pool. As if on cue Remus storms out again, pulls the towel out of Sirius' hands and storms back into the house, slamming the door again.
"Oh bugger, so this means he's probably not cooking for us tonight?" asked Sirius sadly. James shook his head in reply and got out of the pool. Making his way to the house, he tried the door and found that it was locked
"Oh bugger," said James despondently
To be continued...What will happen to our two heroes stranded in the backyard? Who will cook dinner now? What colour is the shirt that Peter finally put on? Where did Remus learn to make such good strawberry daiquiris? Does it matter? Tune in next time to find out...
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