Omake: (written with Black Dragon's approval and much appreciated help)
"Well, um, basically, I've been in training for the better part of the past three months... and you're my first assignment!" Kasumi raised an eyebrow as Ranma smiled.
"Your first assignment? Really?"
"Well... I think the other one was a dream..."
Asuka Takami was poring over a number of damage reports when her cup of coffee suddenly began to glow. She raised an eyebrow, pushed it to the other side of the desk, and unholstered her sidearm. An arm rose from the glowing cup and was soon followed by a ponytail attached to a head and the rest of the person the appendages belonged to.
"Hello! I'm--" CLICK. "Erk."
The blue-haired police captain smirked as the red-haired girl stared at the tip of a non-standard issue pistol that was resting between her eyes. "Hands on your head," Asuka drawled conversationally. The ponytailed girl nervously did as she was asked.
"So," Asuka said, "what're you trying to do by teleporting into my office?"
"Um," The girl gulped, "I'm here to grant you a wish?"
"A wish. Original," the police captain admitted, not budging her gun. "Okay then, this should be good: make every terrorist on the planet spontaneously combust. Can you do that?"
Ranma's eyes widened. "Whuh? But... I-I can't j-just-"
"Wrong answer." Asuka shook her head and snapped her fingers. "Hunter, escort this girl to the holding cell."
"Bu-but... wha?" The redhead's eyes widened as an armored beast slunk into the room behind her.
"You are hereby under arrest for breaking and entering and unauthorized teleportation." Asuka prodded her sharply in the forehead with the gun. "Let's get moving already!"
"He-hey! Wait! There's no law against teleporting!"
"It's not so much a 'law' as a 'general rule of thumb'. We can't have people suddenly appearing wherever they want without having to use doors. Wouldn't be proper. 'Sides, you caught me on a bad day." Asuka smirked as the redhead's expression fell, then prodded her again. "C'mon, move it!"
'How the hell do I get into these situations!?' Ranma whined pathetically to herself as she was led out of the police captain's office.
Outside, a black-haired, pigtailed man sat up from his comfortable position on the couch and glanced at the redhaired prisoner. He shrugged and settled back down on the couch, then suddenly shot back up. "Hey! Wait a sec'!" His finger shot up and pointed at the girl. "You're--"
"Me?" The redhaired girl had her own finger up and pointed at the pigtailed man. Asuka blinked and glanced at Ranma and the redhead.
"You know her?" Asuka raised an eyebrow at Ranma while waving her pistol in the redhead's face.
"Uhhh... sort of..." Ranma stared dumbly at the redhead for a moment. "Clone? Robot? Mirror copy?"
Asuka frowned as she noticed the strong resemblance between the two Ranmas. "I'm thinking minor plot device, myself."
Before the situation could become even more confusing, two men suddenly rushed down the stairs in a panic.
"Captain! Quick! I need someone expendable right now!" Snake shouted as he hopped down the last dozen steps and landed hard on his feet, Tiro just a few steps behind him.
Asuka blinked. "Yamazaki's standing right behind you."
Tiro would have been quite offended at the statement, but was completely occupied looking over the redhead being held at gunpoint. "Junko? Are you cosplaying as Ranma or something? What's up with the new hairstyle?"
The non-cop Ranma blinked. "Junko? My name isn't Junko."
"So you're not on payroll? Then you'll do," Snake said suddenly, grabbing the redheaded goddess and yanking her from Asuka's grip before pulling her up the stairs.
Before she knew what had happened, she was shoved inside a small, bare room on the second floor of the complex. The door shut behind her, and when she turned around, Snake and Tiro were whispering to each other near the doorway.
"Uh, excuse me... but I'm kind of in the middle of a job, here... can I help you?" Ranma asked politely, as she was really in no hurry to get back to the crazy gun-wielding lady.
Snake turned around, looking very, very serious. "Tiro and I have a bet going: it's my firm belief that if a napalm grenade goes off in a small, enclosed, airtight space with no cover, a target in the space would burn to death before the fire consumed all the oxygen in the room and went out, leaving the target to suffocate instead."
Ranma took a long moment to digest this morbid dilemma, and then nodded slowly. "And you want my opinion?"
Clink! A round, metal object bounced on the floor at Snake's feet, and the weapon expert smiled and waved to the redhead as he exited the room, a grenade pin grasped between his thumb and forefinger. Tiro followed behind him and closed the door behind him, shaking his head and mumbling the whole time about the whole incident being a terrible waste of a fine body.
Ranma's left eye twitched as she stared at the explosive device sitting in front of her. "'You don't want to be a debugger,' they said, 'they get all the tough, painful jobs. The Goddess Relief Office is the way to go!' they said, 'the work's a breeze, trust me!' Godhood bites."
KABOOM!
Notes:
This really should've been part of Chapter 2 (or 1, if you disregard the prologue), but I sorta forgot to add it in, so here it is by itself, right before Chapter 3. ¬_¬
And if you haven't read Black Dragon's stories (Guardian, Millennium, Nexus 2, etc.), you should. I mean, like, now. =P
I'd been planning to upload this Omake at the same time as I uploaded Chapter 3, but after pulling two all-nighters on various other things, I think Chapter 3 can wait a tad bit longer. '