That Time

Disclaimer: Let's see... Am I rich? No... Famous? No... Do I own Xena? I think I'm beginning see a pattern here.
Rated- PG
Violence- There's a mighty vicious attack. The squeamish should turn away now.
Sex- Nope.
Language- Nothing to worry about.
oh, in case anyone's wondering, i set this after xena and ares have worked out a sort of relationship in the shipper seasons. grin


Xena woke up knowing that it was going to be one of those days. She was having cramps, her leathers were going to smell like blood for days, and Gabrielle had a headache. She loved Gabrielle dearly: she'd be the first to assert that, but a miserable and cranky Gabrielle meant a miserable, cranky everyone else, and a miserable, cranky day.

Gabrielle burned breakfast.

They walked down a road barely wide enough for a small cart, planning to stop at the next town for some supplies. The leftover rabbit wasn't sitting very well in Xena's stomach.

"It's too hot. My hair feels like it's being slow-roasted in my sweat."

"Walk in the shade by the side of the road, Gabrielle."

"There are swarms of mosquitoes there," Gabrielle groused. "You know I hate it when they get into my mouth."

"Don't open your mouth, then."

"Why don't I just crouch down and lick the mud off of your boots, too, your great warrior princessness?"

"Don't be offended, Gabrielle. I didn't mean it that way."

A sigh. "I know. I'm sorry. Gods, the water in the skins is disgusting."


A small child of indeterminate sex approached them when they neared the town, his--it appeared to be a him--eyes huge and panicked.

"Are you Xena?" Without waiting for an answer, he stuttered, "You got to help Prissa! You got to!"

Ignoring the nausea rolling around inside her, Xena followed the child as he took off at a dead run.

Prissa turned out to be up a tree.

"A dog?" Xena asked. "A dog is stuck in a tree?"

"Yes! You got to help her!"

Xena gave the dog the evilest glare that she could manage through a haze of dull pain. "Xena, warrior princess," she grumbled, "dog fetcher."

She took a running leap and caught hold of the branch upon which the dog sat. It whimpered as she unhooked its claws from the bark and lowered it unceremoniously into the waiting grasp of the child.

It was then that she saw the squirrel. It was small; it was black; it was standing over a nest that contained two tiny balls of fluff.

"Oh, fu--"


Xena sat on the riverbank, the rush of the cold water butting at her bare feet and glittering in the wan light of the moon. She unrolled the bandage from around her hand and stared mournfully at the bite marks. No signs of infection, at least.

She felt him before he appeared.

"I'm in pain, and I smell," she growled. "Don't laugh at me."

Ares raised his hands innocently. "Vicious things, squirrels," he said.

She glowered.

"One minute they're all cute and fluffy, the next, they're ripping your hair out to line their nests."

"It had teeth like pins!"

"Oh yes, all the better for battling those terrible nuts."

Ares surfaced, spluttering, a moment later. They glared at each other warily, carefully. Violence humming through every tense nerve and muscle, they sized up the enemy, assessed every position, every point of possible vulnerability.

He started it.

Xena covered her face with one hand to ward off the splash of water he sent her way, and with the other hand, slapped the surface of the river. Within moments, nothing could be seen but flying sprays of water.

It was over as quickly as it began. When the wet projectiles settled, Ares had Xena pinned to the grass, and both were laughing uncontrollably. She tugged on his vest and pulled him down, and when she kissed him, she could taste the coldness of the water on his lips.

"Mm. You're being human for me, again."

"Hmm?"

"You're still wet."

A thick blanket appeared over their bodies.

"Yes," he said. "Cold?"

"A bit."

As they slowly warmed up, Xena closed her eyes and enjoyed the calmness.

"So, did it suddenly grow fangs?"

"Shut up, Ares."

"Glowing eyes?"