Icha Icha Corruption
Another Hinata-centric one-shot written by me…This might become a NaruHina, like I usually write, but it is mainly just something humorous that popped into my mind. Not even God knows what will happen in this one…unless he read the summary. Let the story start…5…4…3…2…
1337 D15c41m3r: I almost forgot...I don't own Naruto...who thought I did?
----------------------------------------------------------
Naruto's sensei, Jiraiya writes this book. Kakashi is never seen without this book. Kiba reads it when he's bored. And even SHINO reads it…when no one's around. So why don't I try to read it? Hinata thought that it was a good idea…but who knows what she was thinking.
----------------------------------------------------------
December 26, 3:00 PM
Hinata went to the bookstore expecting a good read when she bought it, missing the dirty looks the clerk was giving her; she walked out of the store. The ever popular book was on-sale due to the day. She rushed out with the book in her arms when she bumped into Kurenai.
"A-ano…Kurenai-sensei, I-I was…just getting a book," Hinata stuttered out.
"Ah, what book did you…" Kurenai looked at the book and walked away, chanting to herself, "This is only a nightmare, I will wake up from it soon, Hinata isn't like that…" Hinata wondered what happened and figured Kurenai was late for a mission and didn't have time to talk.
----------------------------------------------------------
December 26, 5:00 PM
Hinata was going to shop for groceries so…It was later that day that she met Naruto buying that same book she was going to read.
"N-Naruto, ano…what are you doing buying that book?" she asked.
"Well," Naruto replied, "Jiraiya-sensei writes this but he never tells me what it's about, only that I need to grow up. Kakashi-sensei is never seen without this book, Kiba reads it when he's bored, and even SHINO reads it, even though he usually does it privately. I want to see what this book is all about that makes people like it."
"T-that's like what I thought when I bought it, maybe we can go to my house later tonight and try to reenact the story…so that we could understand the story better," Hinata said innocently, unknowing of the trouble it could cause.
"Maybe we should try it and…" Naruto looked at the first page and then decided, "On second thought…maybe we shouldn't read this. The content is too…hard." Naruto walked away, his hand was on his head as if he was mentally scarred.
A couple seconds later, outside of the store, Hinata could barely hear Naruto shouting, "SASUKE, WHY THE HECK DO YOU READ THIS STUFF?"
Everyone is acting strange today, Hinata thought, maybe this book has something to do with it…nah, impossible.
----------------------------------------------------------
December 26, 6:00 PM
Hinata was done with her shopping and went home. She decided to go to her room and noticed her new book was missing when Neji came in and decided to talk to her.
"I'm sorry, were you reading this? I just wanted to borrow it, I didn't read this one." Neji was sweating, his hand looked sticky, and his face was reddened. Hinata noticed it but didn't know what that could mean.
As he handed the book back to her, she thanked him and asked for a bottle of milk while she was reading. Neji turned redder and agreed.
-------------------------------------------------------------
December 26, 6:00 PM, 3rd Person Neji's side
After getting her the milk and closing the door behind him to leave Hinata quiet in her room, he suddenly whispered, "BYAKUGAN," in a loud voice. He then retracted it quickly thinking to himself, Dude, she's your cousin. He walked down the hall and saw Hanabi using her Byakugan.
He shouted to her, "SHE'S YOUR SISTER."
Hanabi replied calmly with, "You were doing it to your cousin, and I'm looking through Sasuke's clothes while he's still in front of our house."
Neji walked away disturbed, thinking, Baka…Baka…Baka…
-------------------------------------------------------------
December 26, 8:00 PM, Back to Hinata 3rd person.
Hinata was reading the book, disturbed, while thinking, Is that why Neji's hand is so sticky. I never knew THAT would go THERE. If I ever fell in a river, would Naruto give me CPR and take off all my clothes? If Naruto did IT to me I might actually like it though, but THAT couldn't fit THERE. NOO, WHAT AM I THINKING, the author is probably writing my thoughts right now. That was when she decided to stop thinking and go to sleep.
-------------------------------------------------------------
December 27 (Hinata's Birthday), 7:00 PM
Hinata woke up that morning, her bra unhooked, her panties out of place, her hair messed up, and the sad knowledge that she was the one who did all of it. She put her clothes back on and walked to the dining room, suddenly, "SURPRISE," the rookie 9 and team Gai were there at her birthday party.
Kiba later asked Naruto, "You were supposed to wake her up with a kiss, why couldn't you do that."
"When I walked into her room, she was completely naked, I couldn't wake her up like that," Naruto replied.
Kiba was outraged, "THEN LET ME DO IT. Man…if you let me kiss her, she would have had the time of her life, and if she was naked…
2:00 PM
The party was interrupted by an ambulance. "I feel sorry for Kiba," Hinata said.
Naruto told her, "He died of a massive nosebleed, I'm sure he died happy………too happy…" Naruto mumbled the last part to himself.
----------------------------------------------------------------
December 27, 3:00 PM
Naruto and Hinata decided to take a walk by the river.
"Ano…I'm sorry if I'm t-troubling you," Hinata said. Naruto looked at Hinata and said, "Don't worry, you aren't."
While he was talking, he wasn't looking where he was going so he fell into the ice-cold river and near drowned…
"NARUTO," she screamed, and jumped in with him. She pulled him to the river bank and noticed he wasn't breathing.
I have to do it, he's about to die, this isn't an excuse for me to kiss him. I should also give him a pill to make sure he has energy…maybe push it into his mouth with my tongue and…NOT LIKE THAT.
She laid him down and placed a pill into her mouth. She placed her tongue in his mouth and pushed air into him. Oh no…he's too cold. He'll freeze to death, I'll have to take off his clothes everything that is wet and…his boxers too.
She started to strip him and decided to stay close to him to warm him with her own body heat.
She wouldn't admit to herself, she only did that because that's what happened in Icha Icha Paradise.
Kakashi suddenly passed by and watched as Hinata was hugging a completely naked Naruto.
----------------------------------------------------------------
December 28, 5:00 PM Naruto's side 3rd person
"Dammit," Sasuke said, "Naruto got laid before I did."
"Sasuke," Naruto replied, "What are you talking about?"
"I heard how Hinata was with you naked. I heard that she kissed you and used her tongue too. I need to get laid now. I can't let you surpass me. SAKURA WHERE ARE YOU?"
Naruto was as confused as ever…
----------------------------------------------------------------
December 28, 5:00 PM Hinata again
I have to write in my diary again, she thought.
Dear Diary,
Today I got to see Naruto naked and even kiss him. I hope nobody
saw me. If Naruto ever finds out, I would just die of
embarrassment. I'm glad he was
unconscious.
PS. He's a very big boy…
Strangely, everything she wrote was meant to be innocent, even though it might not be at all.
Hinata walked outside for some fresh air and saw Naruto who instantly screamed out, "SASUKE SAID YOU RAPED ME."
Hinata fainted, Sasuke lied, and Naruto shot me because I wrote this so this is the end of my story.
----------------------------
A/N: Idiocy at its finest. My boredom put this in play too.
I'm replying to my top 10 favorites now.
midnight-angel-of-darkness: Thanks. I can guess you have me on author alert or are lucky. Thanks for being with me since the beginning of my author-ship.
hoyt: Sasuke raped you? He's weird like that.
Hersheys Rock: You almost fell out of your chair, I really did fall out while wirting this.
Pink Ikawa 001: I'm sorry you had to laugh so hard and contain it at the same time. I tried that and hurt my stomach.
nara haruka: My inspiration for Icha Icha Corruption is well...a dream...a really really good dream.
sailorchix: CH. 2; Do you really see me as that much of a pervert? Don't answer that. I'm going to read a little Negima and Love Hina...Ja ne
Chidori vs Rasengan: CH. 2; WHY DO YOU WANT ME TO WRITE A SMUT SCENE...I'M ONLY 14! Well...I...maybe...that's actually a good idea, but I wanna keep this rated T (even if barely).
whatthehellwasithinking: CH. 2; Shino is a pervert. No way around it. He may seem calm but sometimes...I wonder...why does he always keeps his hands in his pockets...in my world...there is a hole in his pocket...that leads to his pants. His thick jacket is just there to hide the shaking.
M Warrior: CH. 2; There is no way I'm making this rated M. This is to educate the children and someday destroy the world with Icha Icha Chaos.
Final Favorite...if you can make it in...I'll post a review for every chapter of every fan fic (even if they are -shudders- SasuHina). Everyone free to try, I like witty comments.