Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. But I do own your souls. That's enough in my opinion.

I am SO SO very sorry for not updating this sooner! I have just been procrastinating and procrastinating and procrastinating, over and over, again and again (do you see my point?). I just never got around to finishing up this chapter, which (for the record) has been scrapped and re-written a grand total of 4 times.

And now my laziness has officially pushed this story to a year without an update. Hurrah.

But all in all... BUWAHAHAHAHA!!! SHE LIVES!!! IT IS COMPLETE!!!

Get up, come on get down with the Fic-ness!

Chapter 3

"The Kyuubi has taken Naruto's body. Bring him back alive. If he resists, well, you know what to do." Tsunade said grimly, dismissing the twenty ANBU she had summoned. They all saluted, then blurred out of sight. Tsunade sighed and sat down, shaking her head. How could I let this happen?, she thought to her self.

"Come now, this can't be all for little ol' me?" Came a voice from behind her. She jumped up and turned around to face the person behind her. There was Naruto, standing in the window, looking at her coolly. At least, it looked like Naruto.

"Demon…" She growled, clenching her fists. How dare he show his face to her!

"Now, now… baa-chan, I believe the kit called you?"

"Don't ever say that to me!" She spat. Tsunade took a menacing step forward.

"You wouldn't want me to drop little Sakura here, now, would you?" Tsunade froze at that, just realizing that he was holding the pink-haired girl in his arms.

"Bastard…" Tsunade mumbled. Blood started oozing itself out from between her clenched fists from squeezing so hard. A tear formed in her eye.

" Now will you hear me out?" The Kyuubi asked, sitting down on the window ledge, setting Sakura gently onto his lap. Sakura unconsciously snuggled up to him, gripping his shirt in her sleep. The Kyuubi smiled softly at this, stroking her hair lovingly.

"Don't ever leave me…" She mumbled in her sleep. A tear squeezed itself out, and ran down her face. He quickly wiped it away, and pulled her closer.

"Do not worry, little one, I and the kit shall never leave you again." He said, still smiling gently.

Tsunade, awed by this display of affection from the Nine Tailed Fox, just stood there, her mouth slightly ajar. She quickly grew angry. She walked over to the window, and slapped Kyuubi in the face, making his head turn.

"Don't touch her!" She screamed. Kyuubi turned his head, glaring at her. A small trickle of blood ran from the corner of his mouth. A few drops dribbled down his chin, landing on Sakura's head, making her flinch a bit.

She squeezed her eyes shut, then slowly began to open them. The face of what looked like an angry Naruto greeted her eyes, and she was startled.

"Naruto…? What am I doing here? I thought you were… OH!" She yelled, remembering what had happened before she passed out. She pushed herself away, recognizing him not as Naruto, but as the Kyuubi. She screamed, still pushing, when he let go of her. She fell to the floor, scrambled back to her feet, and ran behind Tsunade, tears in her eyes.

"What have you done with Naruto?!" She yelled at him, looking out from behind the Hokage.

"Naruto… is dead." The Kyuubi said, disappointment showing in his eyes at having Sakura react that way to him.

"Then why aren't you?" Tsunade asked him angrily.

"Even I do not know. Part of me is with Naruto in the spirit world, though. I can still communicate with him, though he's 'asleep' right now." How you can do that when your dead, I don't know, Kyuubi thought to himself after finishing his sentence.

"What do you mean 'he's asleep'?"

"I mean exactly what I say. He is sleeping right now."

They all just stood there for a second, waiting patiently for the others to say something.

"Tsunade-sensei? Is everything all right? I heard screaming." Shizune said, walking through the door. She caught sight of the Kyuubi-possessed Naruto, screamed herself, then fainted. Everyone sweatdropped.

"You!" She said, pointing to the Kyuubi, "Stay there. I'm going to make sure Shizune is okay."

Back in the spirit world…

Naruto woke up. He stared groggily at the blurry orange and white form sitting next to him, trying to remember where he was, and who was the person sitting next to him. He sat up, rubbing his eyes with his hands. He looked up, seeing an unfamiliar landscape, with an odd purplish-pink sky hanging above it. He looked behind him, seeing a stranger forest, full of twisted, gnarled, and other kinds of deformed trunks, with strangely blue leaves.

How much did I drink last night?, he thought, scratching is head. It didn't hit him, until he looked at the person next to him, that he wasn't in an alcohol induced stupor, but was actually dead.

"Ah!" Naruto said jumping up. Kyuubi's eyes snapped open, looked around, then glared at Naruto.

"What is it, Kit? I'm kind of busy at the moment." He growled.

"You… just… scared me, that's all. What are you doing anyway? It looked to me like your were just sitting on your furry ass doing nothing." Naruto said, calming down. He sat down across from the Kyuubi, crossing his legs and resting his elbows on his knees.

The Kyuubi sighed. "If you must know, I was talking to Tsunade and Sakura."

"WHAT?!" Naruto shouted, jumping back up onto his feet.

"Quiet down! Any louder, and you'll wake the dead." The Kyuubi said. Then realizing what he had said, he began to chuckle. Wake the dead… we're in the spirit world!!

"What's so funny?" Naruto asked, sitting back down. Jeeze, the stress of our situation must be getting to him.

"I-I made a joke! Me, of all people!" Kyuubi said, still chuckling.

"What were you doing talking to Tsunade?" Naruto asked, bringing the conversation back onto track.

"I went there to explain to her that I had a way to bring you back to life."

"Oh… WHAT!!!" Naruto screamed. He stared at the Kyuubi, eyes wide in shock.

"Then Sakura woke up, panicked, and hid behind Tsunade. Then that one girl with the pig came in…" Kyuubi kept rambling on, not realizing that his former host was staring at him.

"Y-y-you have a plan to bring me back to life?!?!"

"Yeah, didn't I tell you? There's a clan of ninja that serve as shepherds for the spirit world, gathering wandering souls and ghosts, and bringing them back to the spirit world via a large spirit gate. I thought I told you that?"

"No, you didn't. When did you discover thi…" He was interrupted by the Kyuubi holding up his palm.

"Hang on a second, I have to concentrate." He said, closing his eyes.

"What's going on?"

"I said shut up!" He growled, bringing his focus back to the human world.

You know where…

The squad of ANBU had just returned, four coming through the windows, two through the skylight, one through Tsunade's personal elevator, six up an escalator that led to Tsunade's personal casino, and seven more through the doorway.

They all gathered around Tsunade, paying no attention to the fact that she was patching up Shizune, who had a gash on the back of her head, or that Naruto and Sakura were standing in the corner. A familiar silver-haired jonin with a mask covering the lower half of his face stepped forward.

"We couldn't find him anywhere, Tsunade-sama." Kakashi stated, saluting.

"Hey Kakashi-sensei!" Kyuubi yelled loudly, imitating Naruto's grin, and waving wildly with both hands.

"Oh, hey Naruto." Kakashi said, his eye curving in a smiling greeting, He turned back to Tsunade.

"N-n-Naruto!" He spluttered, performing a double-take as all of the other ANBU whipped around to face the Kyuubi.

"Ciao!" The Kyuubi said, still grinning. He jumped up on the window ledge, and leapt out the window. They all stared after him for a few seconds as he jumped.

"Get 'im!" someone yelled. They drew all types of pointy objects out of their various vests and sheaths, from kunai to scythes, and followed him out the window.

The Kyuubi appeared back in the room, next to Sakura. "I can't believe I fooled them with a simple genjutsu." He sighed. The quality of the ANBU-nins just wasn't what it used to be.

"You didn't." came a grim reply from behind him. The Kyuubi looked up, realizing he was dead center in the middle of a circle of angry ANBU. He gave a sheepish grin, and then did something that no one would have expected an evil, humorless, twisted, ancient demon would ever do.

"Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" Twenty Kyuto's appeared around the room, they all ran towards the circle.

"OIROKE NO JUTSU!!!!" They all shouted. Yes, the Kyuubi used Naruto's patented 'Ninja Harem' technique. Twenty naked girls latched onto twenty grown men. In a spray of blood, the entire ANBU squad had been disarmed.

"Ummm… how much has Naruto affected your brain?" Tsunade asked worriedly, looking at her fallen warriors. Kyuubi transformed back into Naruto.

"Too much." He sighed. He never would have thought that he, of all people, would sink so low as to use one of Naruto's prank jutsus. It was kind of embarrassing, actually.

What's going on?, came Naruto's question, now that he wasn't focusing so much on the situation in front of him.

Back in the Spirit Realm…

Naruto had been poking and prodding the Kyuubi's still form for a while now, as he attempted to gain the kitsune's attention. But alas, to no avail was he able to get the fox to notice him. Sitting down in a huff, he waited for the Kyuubi to awaken.

Staring around, he realized just how different the Spirit World was… besides the funny sky color and the creepy trees. The native creatures were strange too. Well… at least the ones that weren't the spirits of normal earthen-bound creatures, such as that strange squirrel with the antlers hopping from gnarled branch to gnarled branch. Or that funny looking thing that looked like an odd cross between a bunch of candles and a dog.

Suddenly, the form next to him stirred, drawing Naruto's attention to the dormant fox. The kitsune's eyes opened slightly, and then suddenly they were alert, staring into Naruto's cerulean depths.

"Aaaagh!" Kyuubi screamed, jumping backwards. Few things could startle the demon, but it just so happened that shoving your face in his when he isn't expecting it is one of the few things that does.

"Did… did I… did I just scare you?" Naruto asked with barely contained laughter as he stared in shock at the glaring demon. Naruto now had multiple claims to fame… Student of the famed Jiraiya of the Sannin, Container of the fearsome Kyubbi, returning Sasuke from Orochimaru's clutches, and now scaring the mighty Kyuubi no Youko out of his wits… if he wasn't afraid of death (not that you can kill the dead), he would be busting a gut.

"No… you just caught me… off guard." He muttered, looking away in embarrassment because though he denies otherwise, the great and mighty Nine-Tailed Demon Fox, the powerful Kyuubi no Youko, destroyer of villages and crusher of mountains, had indeed been absolutely terrified by Naruto's little "shove my face in yours" thingy… Hadn't that kid ever heard of personal space?

"Oh? So you'd rather be 'caught off guard', as you put it, than a bit startled? Sounds as if that's more damaging to your reputation than being a little bit spooked by something." Naruto said, sitting down cross-legged in front of the kitsune, grinning smugly.

"Shut it, brat." The Kyuubi barked, regaining his composure. "Now, what is it that you wanted?"

That effectively changed the subject as Naruto paused to think for a second. What was it he was going to ask again? Ummm…… Oh yeah!

"What's happening down there? You're the only one who can do anything, and all I get is hearsay!" He shouted, both frustrated and angry. Naruto really wanted to do something other than sit around and wait for the Kyuubi to get off his furry tush while he was talking to all of Naruto's still-living friends.

"Well, the ANBU squad returned, and attempted to capture me. I used your…. I mean, I handled them swiftly, and…" The Kyuubi was suddenly cut off by Naruto waving his hand, telling him to "Hang on a sec".

"You were about to say something, that you used something of mine… what was it?" Naruto asked, a mischievous glint in his eyes. The Kyuubi began to sweat under his fur, not wanting to admit to having sunk that low.

"It was nothing, just an old trick you used to pull…" The Kyuubi muttered, averting his eyes from Naruto's, not wanting to see that irritatingly wide smile that the boy had.

"An old trick of mine, eh? It wouldn't happen to be the one I pulled on Iruka-sensei and the Closet-perv, right?" Naruto said slyly, fairly confident in his guess. There was only one thing that would ever make the Kyuubi truly embarrassed, and Naruto hadn't found it out until after he and Jiraiya left on their trip. Naruto knew his guess was head-on when he saw Kyuubi flinch.

"Grrrr… no." The Kyuubi growled defensively, huffing embarrassedly. Naruto's grin only got wider.

"Oh, but au contraire, I do believe that somebody is lying!" Naruto cackled, his enjoyment suddenly coming to an end when he saw Kyuubi looking at him, wicked merriment in the kitsune's eyes.

"Naruto, if you don't drop the subject… I'll sell your body for sex. And don't say that I'd be the one feeling it, 'cause all I have to do is remove my consciousness from your body, and then you'll just be a limp little noodle, who'll have a bad limp the next morning!" The fox said evilly, a wicked grin of his own splitting his face. Naruto sat there, flabbergasted at the Kyuubi's words.

"W-w-what?!!" He spluttered, staring at the Kyuubi in horror. How could he even contemplate such evil thoughts? It was his body, dammit!

"Then drop the subject!"

"Sore loser…" Naruto muttered, glaring at his companion. Stupid fox, controlling his body…

Real World, Las Vegas! (just kidding)

Sakura suddenly felt a pang in her head. For the last couple of minutes, the Kyuubi had just standing there, doing nothing, his eyes closed. And for the same amount of time, she had been having this weird twingy feeling in the back of her head, somewhat like a muscle spasm.

A rush of emotions suddenly came over her, and she had no idea where they were coming from. She first felt a sense of smugness… then surprise, horror, and then followed by anger… and with each emotion, she could feel little words and thoughts entering her mind… and none of them were hers.

Then what came to her had most definitely not originated from her. First of all, because it was a man's voice in her head, and not her angry side. Second of all, she had heard the voice before, which was right before she saw…

Sore loser… you never let me have any fun!

…

What do you mean by 'If someone were to know that I had had the upper hand in a battle of wits'?

…

Stupid fox.

Naruto.

(err… well, Kyuubi in Naruto's body.)

Well… I hate myself for ending it like that, but I just wanted to get it finished and put up. If you can't tell, I don't follow a schedule when I write my stories, nor do I work on them regularly. I'm actually pretty slow with them after the first couple chapters or so (as shown by this… or even worse, Sarutobi High).

It's not the problem of having too many stories to work on, never that. It's just the problem of having them, and not having time to work on them (nor the motivation). Fortunately, I hope to get the fourth chapter of this up within in the year, and I'm most definitely going to try to update every story I have before Christmas or New Year.

Lol, I really do want to get all of these worked on…

-ChickenDeNoodleyNoodle the Third