Chapter Forty-Seven: Apologies and Invites

Seth stood at the kitchen counter, staring down at his coffee mug. He took a quick swig and stared around the room as he swallowed the burning liquid. The house was completely silent, and if he hadn't passed his parents room and heard them snoring on the way down the stairs, he would think the house was completely empty, too. He inhaled deeply, swishing his tongue around and trying to get rid of the unpleasant mixed taste of caffeine and morning breathe. He slunk down into one of the stools surrounding the island, twisting his body back and forth so the swivel chair swung with him. He pouted his lips and made noise with his mouth, bopping back and forth like an extremely bored elementary schooler. His fingers tapped the marble surface of the counter, and he began to make an off beat tempo with his mouth and hands.

"Seth, what are you doing, son?" Sandy asked, standing in the doorway of the kitchen. He had his normal shirt and tie on, with the morning newspaper under his arm. Seth was startled by his sudden presence and stopped his one man band act. "Uh, nothing." he said, swiveling naturally toward his father. He crossed his hands and put on an embarrassed smile. Sandy crossed the kitchen, walking passed his son to pour himself a cup of coffee. Seth watched him, then looked back toward the kitchen's entrance. "Where's mom?" he asked, realizing his parents hadn't come down together as usual. "Still in bed." Sandy answered, taking a sip of his black drink. "I have to get to the office early today…so I should probably get going soon." He patted Seth on the back and rounded the island, suddenly feeling the same overwhelming silence Seth had felt before.

"Where's Ryan?" Seth's face tightened in anguish at the question. Sandy sighed and tossed the newspaper onto the top in front of him, leaning over it with his hands. "What did you do now?" he asked. Seth let his hands rest on his lap, his fingers intertwined. "I kind of told Marissa something Ryan didn't want her to know." Seth sunk back into his seat, crossing his arms in preparation for a lecture. "Well, your mouth always did bring out the worst in you." Sandy said with a shake of his head. Seth nodded, mimicking his father. "I don't know what to do…I don't want Ryan to be mad at me." Sandy turned toward the back door, looking at the pool house through the glass. He saw no movement and turned back to Seth. "Did you talk to him about it?" Seth shook his head no. "Well then how do you know he'll be mad?" Seth sat up for further emphasis.

"Dad, it's Ryan." he pointed out. "I made Marissa storm out on him after their first real date being back together …trust me, he's mad." Seth sat, stirring in regret. "I don't know what to do." He looked down at his hands, pondering all possible ways to grovel for forgiveness. "Talk to him." Sandy ordered. "Tell him you're sorry and stupid and you didn't mean to cause any trouble." Seth wasn't enthused. "We'll see how well that works out." he said, his natural sarcasm engulfing the statement. Sandy lifted his wrist, checking the time on his Rolex. "I gotta go…look, it's worth a try. I'll see you tonight. You better get moving for school, too." Seth acknowledged his father's last words, watching him hurry out the front door. He stayed put momentarily, dreading the upcoming encounter with the current pool house occupant.

He finally built up enough courage to get out of his seat and walk to the back doors. He stood watching the pool house, thinking up every horrible way the next few minutes of his life could go. He finally opened one of the doors and moseyed excruciatingly slowly to the steps of the pool house. He paused a few inches away, feeling his heart beat quicken. Ryan had been mad before, but Seth had really screwed up this time. Seth hated when people were mad at him, and to have his best friend furious wouldn't be the best of sights. He gently knocked and waited to here Ryan's yell to go away, but he heard nothing. After a second knock and another round of silence, Seth opened the door, peeking his head in to see if Ryan was inside. The room was empty.

"Greeaat." Seth mumbled to himself, stepping all the way in. With Ryan nowhere in sight, he sighed loudly and looked around. The bathroom door opened. Ryan walked out, fully dressed, rubbing his wet head with a towel. Seth was momentarily startled, and his nerves returned with the sudden appearance. "Oh, good, you're here." he stuttered, clapping his hands together firmly. Ryan furrowed his eyebrows and nodded, giving his hair one last rub before tossing the towel onto his bed. Seth took a step forward. "Alright, look man." he started. "I'm really, really sorry about what happened last night. It's just that you were upstairs and Marissa was there and that just seemed like a good topic to converse about and-"

"Seth, it's okay." Ryan interrupted. Seth paused in surprise. "Wait, you're not mad?" Ryan shook his head and walked down the few stairs to the main floor. "I was, but you're not the one I should be mad at." he said. "You didn't know that I hadn't told her about my dreams, and it was me who screwed up." Seth smiled and sighed with relief. Ryan shoved a text book into his backpack and zipped it up. "I'm sure it would have come up sooner or later…so at least you got her mad at me sooner." he finished. Seth got out of Ryan's way so he could pass and pick up the button down shirt off the chair to their side. He swung it around himself, pulling his arms through the sleeves. "I think I have a way to get you out of the dog house." Seth propositioned. Ryan's eyes grew bright as he finished the last few buttons, leaving the top of his wife beater showing.

"Prom is coming up." Seth said. "Plan a big romantic gesture, apologize, and ask her to go." Ryan walked passed Seth again and stopped in front of the small mirror by the doors to straighten out his hair. "I thought the big romantic gesture was your thing." he said, using his fingers as a comb. Seth crossed his arms and tilt head nodded, in his mind thinking of how slick he was when it came to public apologies. "I'll let you carry the trend." Ryan finished up. "I don't think so. I'll just talk to her at school. There are other ways to apologize than standing on top of some kind of food cart and belting out to the whole school how sorry you are and how much you love a girl." He grabbed his book bag and gave Seth a look before walking out the door. "Hey, my tactics are golden!" he confirmed following behind.

"Come on, Coop!" Summer yelled as they walked up the stairs of Harbor High School. "Senior Prom is going to be awesome!" Marissa looked down at her feet, absent mindedly listening to her friend's excited blabber. Summer continued to rattle Marissa's ear off as they entered the halls of the school. "I don't know, Sum." Marissa grumbled. "I was all excited for prom, but now…I'm not so sure. I probably won't even have a date." They stopped at Marissa's locker, and she let out a sigh as she fiddled with the combination. Summer gawked at her. "You honestly think because of what happened Ryan won't ask you to prom?" Marissa shrugged as she pulled her locker door open and pushed it again the other closed ones. "You should have seen his face." she said, taking a few books out of her bag and resting them inside.

"Marissa, I already told you that everything is gonna be fine." Summer insisted. "I promise you…you two will work this out, have hot make-up sex, and then the four of us will have a kick ass prom night." Marissa's mouth dropped open, then morphed into a smile as she playfully swatted at Summer's arm. Summer laughed. "You see?" she said. "You're already feeling better." In the corner of her eye, Marissa saw the boys walking up the stairs of the school. "Not for long." she said, hiding her face behind her locker door. Summer tugged at her elbow as they approached. Marissa reappeared as they formed a circle. "Hey guys." Summer greeted. Ryan and Marissa both looked down awkwardly. Seth said good morning and they all grew silent, looking back and forth from one to the other. Summer's eyes darted from Ryan and Marissa and then landed on Seth. "Come on, Cohen. Walk me to Bio." she said, figuring ordering Seth to leave would give Ryan and Marissa some alone time. She linked there arms together and gave a wave. "See ya later, Coop."

Before Marissa could object Seth and Summer had walked away leaving her alone with Ryan. She finally met his eyes as he took a step closer. "Hi." he said, swallowing the lump in his throat. "Hi." she said back. Ryan leaned against the wall and motioned to say something, but his words were cut off by the sound of the bell. They both let out frustrated sighs. Marissa grabbed a pen out of her locker before slamming it shut. "We'll talk later?" she asked, waiting for his nod before hurrying away in the opposite direction. He watched her disappear around a corridor, then turned to get to his own first period. He would have to wait until lunch to get out what he had to say.

When fourth period finally let out, Ryan shuffled his way to the quad, stopping at his locker to trade text books. He walked around the front of the school, seeing if Marissa had the same idea he had, but when she was nowhere to be found he walked around back to the lunch tables. He didn't see her standing in any food line and pushed his way through the cliques of students until he spotted her at a table with Summer. He stood watching her from afar. She seemed so down in the dumps. Ryan wanted nothing more than to see her smile again. He'd have to find some magic to work. He approached the table and rested his hand atop the metal surface. "Hey." he said, breaking their quiet conversation. The girls looked up. He looked at Marissa. "Will you take a walk with me?" Marissa nodded, leaving Summer as Seth set down a tray of food and handed her a salad. They watched Ryan and Marissa walk off toward the parking lot.

The noise lessoned a few octaves as they slowly strolled down the stairs toward Ryan's car. "I figured this would be easier if it was quiet." he said, giving her a nervous smile. She nodded in agreement. He opened the passenger door for her and let her settle in while he rounded into the driver's. The seats were especially warm in the morning sun. Ryan shifted in his seat to face her better. He took a deep breath, searching for words. "Look Marissa…I don't know how to explain to you how sorry I am." he started. "But…like I told you…I just got scared. I didn't know what I was seeing meant and I let my conscience get the better of me." Marissa listened intently, appreciating his words and being somewhat impressed. In all the time they had dated she had never heard him confess something so honestly.

"I don't want you to ever think that you can't talk to me." she said, looking into his sad blue eyes. "I don't think that." he said. He played with her hands, intertwining their fingers and sliding them up and down. "In this situation…I just didn't know what to do. I didn't want to tell you and have you freak out and be nervous with me. I just figured that if anything were to really happen…I would know how to stop it…and I could save you." He looked down as his hand remained still. She held it with both of hers. "You don't have to save me, Ryan." she whispered. "You only have to be with me…be there for me…isn't that what you want?" He nodded and rubbed her palm with his thumb. "Of course it is."

"Then stop fighting this." she pleaded. "Stop worrying. You'll only make yourself wonder if what you see in your dreams means more than what it looks like." He grew frustrated. "I can't just sit here…and not wonder, Marissa." he said, breaking their contact. "You know me better than that." He sat up, beginning to speak with his hands. "I always- I always have to fix things. I always have to be there when you're in trouble." He sighed in defeat, but kept searching for words to throw emphasis on his point. "I just…I don't want to see you get hurt. I mean…what if-"

"What if?" she mimicked, interrupting. "That's just it, Ryan. Every single day of our lives is what if. That's what life is about." He sat back, relaxing to listen to what she had to say. "What if I win the lottery today? Or what if I get hit by a bus on the way to school?" she continued. "That's just life. It's about taking chances and waiting for things to happen. You walk outside…do you go left or go right? You can take one step closer to your destiny or one step further away. Nobody wakes up in the morning knowing exactly what's going to happen." She took his hand again, pausing to finish her inspiring monologue. "Your job is not to save the world, Ryan." He looked up at her again. "It's to be eighteen years old…and be with me." Her hand went up his forearm and back down again to touch his fingers. "Stop worrying." she whispered. "The world will find a way to fix itself. You'll see." She gave him a half smile that he returned reluctantly.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." he said, whole heartedly. "But I don't know…you really can't expect me to suddenly be fine with this." She shook her head and leaned closer to him. "I don't expect that at all." she defended. "I just don't want this to come between us…and make you keep things from me anymore." She tilted her head to lean against the head rest. They gave each other puppy dog eyes. Ryan glanced out the glass of the windshield, a brightly colored banner catching his field of vision. "Alright, I'll tell you what…" he spoke, turning back to her again. "I will be completely honest…from this day forward…about everything…dreams or no dreams…if you agree to go to prom with me." He flashed her a half smile and held a hand out to her like a perfect gentleman.

Her eyes brightened with the invitation. "Really?" she asked, not yet getting her hopes up with the knowledge of Ryan's past prom escapes. He put his hand down and straightened himself out in the seat. "Hey, if you don't want to go…" She urged to grab his hand back. "No!" she almost yelled. "No, no I, um, I'd love…to go to prom with you." She smiled widely at him as he leaned into her. He put a palm to her cheek, pulling her into a delicate kiss. Her hands found his face, too, as they made up in the front seat of the Range Rover. Ryan pulled away, opening his door. "We should get back before lunch ends." he said, pointing toward the back of the cafeteria. "All of this mushiness makes me hungry." Marissa followed suit, getting out of the car and walking with Ryan back toward the school. She clutched his arm, then slid her hand down to his, gripping it softly.

Seth and Summer sat at the table, leaned back in their chairs with rolled up napkins strewn around their food. They both looked up as Ryan and Marissa walked toward them. Summer gave Marissa a grin, seeing her hand wrapped inside Ryan's. Marissa let go and went to see by Summer again. "Hey man." Ryan said in Seth's direction. "Come get food with me." Seth gave Summer's hand a squeeze before getting up from his seat to follow Ryan. Seth waited to speak until the girls were out of hearing range. He looked back at the table where the girls staring to laugh and talk. "So, uh, is everything good now?" he asked. Ryan nodded, picking up an empty tray. "Everything's fine." Ryan replied. "We talked and we're fine." Seth grabbed Ryan's arm, hanging from it like a monkey. "Brrr, it suddenly got cold out here." he gasped. Ryan shook Seth off him.

"What are you talking about?" Seth shrugged as they stopped in the food line. "Hell has frozen over." he informed. "You and Marissa actually talked about your feelings." Ryan rolled his eyes and pretended to laugh. "Yeah, that's…that's really funny." Seth nodded and patted himself on the shoulder. "I really thought it was." They moved forward in the line. Seth looked back at the girls. "So what now?" he asked on a more serious note, wondering if Ryan and Marissa had really gotten some closure on the dream issue. Ryan looked at Marissa sitting at the table, then back at Seth with wondering eyes. "We have to make plans fro prom night."

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