Title: You were there
Author: Gaudicia
E-mail: [email protected]
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Roswell characters, the poem is mine.
Rating: PG-13
Category: UC
Summary: Read and find out, it involves character's death, but have faith in me, please!
Distribution: Just ask.
Author's note: I want to thank, Rainydayinapril(April) again and Julie for just being there and encouraging me!!!
Author's note 1: Any tips, suggestions are welcomed! Sorry, for the grammar mistakes!
Feedback: It's always welcomed! Please tell me what you think!
You were there
Liz sat in the balcony, she was dressed in black, she has her journal in her hand, and she couldn't bring herself to open it. It held too many memories; the balcony itself held memories, memories that haunted her.
"Liz, are you okay? You know you don't have to go to the funeral, right?" Her worried father's voice came through.
Liz looked at her father sadness and regret shinning in her eyes. "I know, daddy, I know. But I have to." Liz turned her attention back to her journal effectively dismissing her father.
Her journal fell off her hands, landing opened on the floor. Liz picked up the journal, and she couldn't hold her tears, they slowly began to slide down her cheek, she couldn't help but read the poem out loud.
centerEvery time I cried,
You were there.
Every time I need you,
You were there.
You were there,
In my toughest times.
You were there,
When I was alone.
You were there;
To wrap yours arms around me,
As I cried.
You were there,
To offer comfort,
When I need it the most.
You were there,
When I just needed someone to listen.
You were there,
When I needed a shoulder to lean on.
When I went to you,
You were always there,
Never pushing me away.
You just wrap your arms around me
And it's like the world doesn't exist.
It just slips away.
You are there,
To show me I'm never alone.
You were there,
Even in my happiest days.
You were the reason for it,
Yet I didn't see it.
You were there,
When I needed someone to love me.
The day you told me you loved me was
The most happiest day of my life.
It gave me my biggest joy,
Yet I didn't know it.
I just laughed when you told me.
I told you I loved you,
But like the good friend you were.
I never knew how wrong I was.
Now I know what I've lost.
Now I know what I was to blind to see.
Now I cry for the lost of a love so pure and gentle,
And now there are no pair of arms to be wrap around me.
Yet I have joy,
Because I have been loved and I have love.
And even though you are now gone,
I know you are there.
Because you are there were it counts the most,
In my heart.
Now I know you'll always be there,
Because you left me the sweet memory of who
You are and that one you were mine.
And even now,
You are there./center
Sobs left her throat once she finished reading, she hadn't read that poem in years, she had stopped writing in her journal a long time ago. The poem was meant for the love of her life, it was meant for that impossible love that never had a chance. After a few minutes she was able to calm down. Her memories taking her at the one time she was truly happy. Liz looked through her journal, finding what she was looking for; she smiled a sad smile. There he was the love of her life, the only man she ever loved the only man that made her happy, and couldn't be there with her. He had left some years ago, no one knew why, but she knew, and it was her fault, and now she was paying for it. She had many regrets, but not going with him when he asked her to was the thing she regretted the most, he had offered her a chance at happiness, at truly being loved, and she left it all go to waist…because of duty. No one knew of her secret love, and it had stayed that way not even Max, even though they had connected many times, there still was a part of her that he wasn't able to touch, and that part held all her deepest secrets.
Liz looked at the date of her last entry; it was the day before her wedding. When she wrote in it that day, she had known it would be the last day she would ever write again for she had a feeling that her soul would die, and it would be as if she were living in hell. She had been right, the first few months of their marriage had been easy to live with, she didn't know when it started, but it came to the point where she couldn't pretended to be the happy wife, where just his mere touch repulsed her. Max began to notice and their sweet, innocent relationship, turned into a sad, bitter, hateful one, even their friendship vanished, and then hell began. The only thing we had in common was that when people was around they chose to pretend they were still the happy and completely in love couple, to everyone we were still in the bliss that a newly wed would be. We ended up sleeping in different rooms; I even began to visit my parents more frequently. Even through all the hard times we were going through, even though it was so obvious that there wasn't any love between us, that even our friendship had lost it's spark, Max still continued to pretend, he wanted to believe everything was okay between us. Now she was out of that hell, but now will another one begin?
Liz closed her journal as in that moment her mother came in. "Liz, sweetie, its time to go."
Liz looked at her mother and said, "I'll be down in a second."
Mrs. Parker stood observing her daughter after a few seconds she nodded and left.
Once her mother was gone Liz took the picture and put it inside the journal again. Liz sighed and put the journal on the desk and with one last look at her room she left.
When Liz got downstairs everyone was there as soon as they saw her; they were immediately hugging her and offering her their condolences.
Liz knew they were waiting for her to say that they should get going so she did, and they were on their way to the cemetery.
Once they got there the services immediately began, Liz looked around, and noticed there weren't many people, and most of them were immediately family, but she knew that's what he would have wanted. Everyone was looking at her with pity in their eyes. She wanted to run and scream that they shouldn't pity her, than even though she was left all alone, she would be happy, that she would finally be at peace, that her hell had ended. She was sad that he had died, but maybe finally she would be able to move on. She felt dirty for thinking that, but some place in her heart she finally felt at peace.
The wind suddenly blew making her shiver with cold and the hairs stood up, and when she looked behind there he was, in all his glory. The only thing she could do was stare and like a ghost, he disappeared.
She felt someone tugging her shoulder and when she looked to see who it was she saw Maria.
"Come on, chica, it's over," Maria said, quietly.
Liz nodded and silently followed, when she was getting inside the car she looked back hoping to see him again, but he wasn't there.
They returned to the Crashdown and stayed a while, offering Liz support. Around 9:00 p.m. they started to leave. Liz told her parents that they should go to sleep, when they insisted on helping, she told them she could handle it that she needed something to help her take her mind off things.
Liz was making sure the door was closed, a habit she couldn't break. She almost fainted when she saw him again; slowly she began to walk towards the door, she silently opened the door letting him in.
He entered just as quietly as Liz had opened the door, they couldn't only stare at each other not daring to speak fearing that if they did one of them would disappear, not being able to stay in silence any longer he asked, "How are you, Liz?"
Liz looked at him not knowing how to answer; she said the first thing that came to mind. "He's dead, Michael, he's dead."
Michael seeing she was about to lose control immediately rushed to her side, bringing her into his arms. "I know, Liz, I'm sorry." Michael kept whispering those words until she calmed down. Even after she was already calmed, he still kept holding her.
Liz breathed in his familiar scent, she felt at peace in his arm and she could hear her soul singing. "I missed you so much."
"I missed you too. I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner.." Michael said, as her rocked her back and forth.
"You have nothing to be sorry about, you have always been there with me when it counted and you are here now. I'm the one that should me sorry, and I am so sorry, Michael, so sorry. It's my fault, if I had just listened to you. If I hadn't been so stubborn, if I hadn't been so unselfish, if I hadn't had a sense of duty this wouldn't have happened. If I had just-"
Michael cut her off by putting his index finger on her lips. "Shhh. Liz, stop with the ifs. What's done is done, and we can't change anything about it. We have to learn to live with our mistakes, and it's not your fault Max died."
Liz stared into Michael's eyes, letting his words sink in, and she saw the change in him. Liz removed herself from Michael's embrace, and asked, "Do you want some coffee?"
"Yes, with milk, please," Michael answered as he followed her. He noticed the tension that seemed to have taken place, but he didn't mention it.
"I thought you liked black coffee," Liz mindlessly said.
"I've change, so has my taste in coffee."
Suddenly an uncomfortable silence took over, and neither of them did anything to break it. Only did the whistle announcing the coffee relieved it for a moment, but they still stayed silent.
Liz served him his coffee, and then began to stare at hers. 'Is there a chance for us? He has change so much. I saw it when I looked into his eyes. His soul is alive and warm, and mine is dead and cold.'
"Since when do you like black coffee?" Michael asked the same question she moments ago asked him.
Without lifting her gaze from her cup, she answered, "Since you left. You aren't the only that's change."
"We won't be able to pick up where we left of, will we?" Liz asked out of the blue.
"We're too different now for that to happen…we have to take things slow, get to know each other again."
"Since when are you so wise, and level headed?" Liz joked trying to brake the tension.
"It took a while…after I got over my anger when you told me you wouldn't come with me, I started to see things differently."
"Oh. You know? I regret not going with you. But I was and still am a coward. My telling you I had to stay, because I owe it to Max was an excuse. I was scared, I couldn't keep lying, I couldn't tell the truth, and I couldn't run away, I was trapped. I created my own little hell, and I took Max with me. If I hadn't been so scare Max would still be alive…you know I'm still scared, I'm more scared than ever now. I'm all alone," Liz confessed.
Michael put his coffee on the counter, and drew her towards him in a tight embrace. "Liz, you are not alone, I'm here with you."
"But for how long will that be?" Liz asked in a small voice full of wonder.
"As long as you want me too." Seeing Liz was falling asleep, he asked, "Where are you staying?"
"In my old room, Mom and Dad didn't want me to stay by myself, and frankly I didn't want to stay at my house either."
Michael picked Liz up, and took her to her room. When he had her tucked in he got up from the bed, but was stopped by Liz's hands.
"Please, don't go. Stay." Seeing he was about to protest, she added, "I just want you to hold me." Liz scudded over, and made room for Michael.
Once Michael got comfortable, Liz dropped her head to his chest, and wrapped her arm around his waist, and whispered, "No matter, how much you and I have change I know something that hasn't." At Michael's questioning look she said, "My love for you, Michael, my love for you."
"I love you too, Liz. Now you better go to sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long day."
Liz snuggled closer to Michael, and fell asleep with one thought in mind. 'My hell is over and my heaven is just beginning.'
Tomorrow will be another day, but she knows she can handle it, she has her love besides her.
The end!!!
Author: Gaudicia
E-mail: [email protected]
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Roswell characters, the poem is mine.
Rating: PG-13
Category: UC
Summary: Read and find out, it involves character's death, but have faith in me, please!
Distribution: Just ask.
Author's note: I want to thank, Rainydayinapril(April) again and Julie for just being there and encouraging me!!!
Author's note 1: Any tips, suggestions are welcomed! Sorry, for the grammar mistakes!
Feedback: It's always welcomed! Please tell me what you think!
You were there
Liz sat in the balcony, she was dressed in black, she has her journal in her hand, and she couldn't bring herself to open it. It held too many memories; the balcony itself held memories, memories that haunted her.
"Liz, are you okay? You know you don't have to go to the funeral, right?" Her worried father's voice came through.
Liz looked at her father sadness and regret shinning in her eyes. "I know, daddy, I know. But I have to." Liz turned her attention back to her journal effectively dismissing her father.
Her journal fell off her hands, landing opened on the floor. Liz picked up the journal, and she couldn't hold her tears, they slowly began to slide down her cheek, she couldn't help but read the poem out loud.
centerEvery time I cried,
You were there.
Every time I need you,
You were there.
You were there,
In my toughest times.
You were there,
When I was alone.
You were there;
To wrap yours arms around me,
As I cried.
You were there,
To offer comfort,
When I need it the most.
You were there,
When I just needed someone to listen.
You were there,
When I needed a shoulder to lean on.
When I went to you,
You were always there,
Never pushing me away.
You just wrap your arms around me
And it's like the world doesn't exist.
It just slips away.
You are there,
To show me I'm never alone.
You were there,
Even in my happiest days.
You were the reason for it,
Yet I didn't see it.
You were there,
When I needed someone to love me.
The day you told me you loved me was
The most happiest day of my life.
It gave me my biggest joy,
Yet I didn't know it.
I just laughed when you told me.
I told you I loved you,
But like the good friend you were.
I never knew how wrong I was.
Now I know what I've lost.
Now I know what I was to blind to see.
Now I cry for the lost of a love so pure and gentle,
And now there are no pair of arms to be wrap around me.
Yet I have joy,
Because I have been loved and I have love.
And even though you are now gone,
I know you are there.
Because you are there were it counts the most,
In my heart.
Now I know you'll always be there,
Because you left me the sweet memory of who
You are and that one you were mine.
And even now,
You are there./center
Sobs left her throat once she finished reading, she hadn't read that poem in years, she had stopped writing in her journal a long time ago. The poem was meant for the love of her life, it was meant for that impossible love that never had a chance. After a few minutes she was able to calm down. Her memories taking her at the one time she was truly happy. Liz looked through her journal, finding what she was looking for; she smiled a sad smile. There he was the love of her life, the only man she ever loved the only man that made her happy, and couldn't be there with her. He had left some years ago, no one knew why, but she knew, and it was her fault, and now she was paying for it. She had many regrets, but not going with him when he asked her to was the thing she regretted the most, he had offered her a chance at happiness, at truly being loved, and she left it all go to waist…because of duty. No one knew of her secret love, and it had stayed that way not even Max, even though they had connected many times, there still was a part of her that he wasn't able to touch, and that part held all her deepest secrets.
Liz looked at the date of her last entry; it was the day before her wedding. When she wrote in it that day, she had known it would be the last day she would ever write again for she had a feeling that her soul would die, and it would be as if she were living in hell. She had been right, the first few months of their marriage had been easy to live with, she didn't know when it started, but it came to the point where she couldn't pretended to be the happy wife, where just his mere touch repulsed her. Max began to notice and their sweet, innocent relationship, turned into a sad, bitter, hateful one, even their friendship vanished, and then hell began. The only thing we had in common was that when people was around they chose to pretend they were still the happy and completely in love couple, to everyone we were still in the bliss that a newly wed would be. We ended up sleeping in different rooms; I even began to visit my parents more frequently. Even through all the hard times we were going through, even though it was so obvious that there wasn't any love between us, that even our friendship had lost it's spark, Max still continued to pretend, he wanted to believe everything was okay between us. Now she was out of that hell, but now will another one begin?
Liz closed her journal as in that moment her mother came in. "Liz, sweetie, its time to go."
Liz looked at her mother and said, "I'll be down in a second."
Mrs. Parker stood observing her daughter after a few seconds she nodded and left.
Once her mother was gone Liz took the picture and put it inside the journal again. Liz sighed and put the journal on the desk and with one last look at her room she left.
When Liz got downstairs everyone was there as soon as they saw her; they were immediately hugging her and offering her their condolences.
Liz knew they were waiting for her to say that they should get going so she did, and they were on their way to the cemetery.
Once they got there the services immediately began, Liz looked around, and noticed there weren't many people, and most of them were immediately family, but she knew that's what he would have wanted. Everyone was looking at her with pity in their eyes. She wanted to run and scream that they shouldn't pity her, than even though she was left all alone, she would be happy, that she would finally be at peace, that her hell had ended. She was sad that he had died, but maybe finally she would be able to move on. She felt dirty for thinking that, but some place in her heart she finally felt at peace.
The wind suddenly blew making her shiver with cold and the hairs stood up, and when she looked behind there he was, in all his glory. The only thing she could do was stare and like a ghost, he disappeared.
She felt someone tugging her shoulder and when she looked to see who it was she saw Maria.
"Come on, chica, it's over," Maria said, quietly.
Liz nodded and silently followed, when she was getting inside the car she looked back hoping to see him again, but he wasn't there.
They returned to the Crashdown and stayed a while, offering Liz support. Around 9:00 p.m. they started to leave. Liz told her parents that they should go to sleep, when they insisted on helping, she told them she could handle it that she needed something to help her take her mind off things.
Liz was making sure the door was closed, a habit she couldn't break. She almost fainted when she saw him again; slowly she began to walk towards the door, she silently opened the door letting him in.
He entered just as quietly as Liz had opened the door, they couldn't only stare at each other not daring to speak fearing that if they did one of them would disappear, not being able to stay in silence any longer he asked, "How are you, Liz?"
Liz looked at him not knowing how to answer; she said the first thing that came to mind. "He's dead, Michael, he's dead."
Michael seeing she was about to lose control immediately rushed to her side, bringing her into his arms. "I know, Liz, I'm sorry." Michael kept whispering those words until she calmed down. Even after she was already calmed, he still kept holding her.
Liz breathed in his familiar scent, she felt at peace in his arm and she could hear her soul singing. "I missed you so much."
"I missed you too. I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner.." Michael said, as her rocked her back and forth.
"You have nothing to be sorry about, you have always been there with me when it counted and you are here now. I'm the one that should me sorry, and I am so sorry, Michael, so sorry. It's my fault, if I had just listened to you. If I hadn't been so stubborn, if I hadn't been so unselfish, if I hadn't had a sense of duty this wouldn't have happened. If I had just-"
Michael cut her off by putting his index finger on her lips. "Shhh. Liz, stop with the ifs. What's done is done, and we can't change anything about it. We have to learn to live with our mistakes, and it's not your fault Max died."
Liz stared into Michael's eyes, letting his words sink in, and she saw the change in him. Liz removed herself from Michael's embrace, and asked, "Do you want some coffee?"
"Yes, with milk, please," Michael answered as he followed her. He noticed the tension that seemed to have taken place, but he didn't mention it.
"I thought you liked black coffee," Liz mindlessly said.
"I've change, so has my taste in coffee."
Suddenly an uncomfortable silence took over, and neither of them did anything to break it. Only did the whistle announcing the coffee relieved it for a moment, but they still stayed silent.
Liz served him his coffee, and then began to stare at hers. 'Is there a chance for us? He has change so much. I saw it when I looked into his eyes. His soul is alive and warm, and mine is dead and cold.'
"Since when do you like black coffee?" Michael asked the same question she moments ago asked him.
Without lifting her gaze from her cup, she answered, "Since you left. You aren't the only that's change."
"We won't be able to pick up where we left of, will we?" Liz asked out of the blue.
"We're too different now for that to happen…we have to take things slow, get to know each other again."
"Since when are you so wise, and level headed?" Liz joked trying to brake the tension.
"It took a while…after I got over my anger when you told me you wouldn't come with me, I started to see things differently."
"Oh. You know? I regret not going with you. But I was and still am a coward. My telling you I had to stay, because I owe it to Max was an excuse. I was scared, I couldn't keep lying, I couldn't tell the truth, and I couldn't run away, I was trapped. I created my own little hell, and I took Max with me. If I hadn't been so scare Max would still be alive…you know I'm still scared, I'm more scared than ever now. I'm all alone," Liz confessed.
Michael put his coffee on the counter, and drew her towards him in a tight embrace. "Liz, you are not alone, I'm here with you."
"But for how long will that be?" Liz asked in a small voice full of wonder.
"As long as you want me too." Seeing Liz was falling asleep, he asked, "Where are you staying?"
"In my old room, Mom and Dad didn't want me to stay by myself, and frankly I didn't want to stay at my house either."
Michael picked Liz up, and took her to her room. When he had her tucked in he got up from the bed, but was stopped by Liz's hands.
"Please, don't go. Stay." Seeing he was about to protest, she added, "I just want you to hold me." Liz scudded over, and made room for Michael.
Once Michael got comfortable, Liz dropped her head to his chest, and wrapped her arm around his waist, and whispered, "No matter, how much you and I have change I know something that hasn't." At Michael's questioning look she said, "My love for you, Michael, my love for you."
"I love you too, Liz. Now you better go to sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long day."
Liz snuggled closer to Michael, and fell asleep with one thought in mind. 'My hell is over and my heaven is just beginning.'
Tomorrow will be another day, but she knows she can handle it, she has her love besides her.
The end!!!