Crisscross
By: Stained In Negativity
Epilogue: Darkest Corners
In reality, there is no dark corner. There is no door through which we can enter another person's heart. On that illusory door, there is not a lock for with which we can keep ourselves safe from intruders.
There is no safe place.
There are only ways of scarring others. There are ways to find out what makes a person who they are. There are ways of getting under someone's skin.
Take for example, the sun-kissed girl.
There are crisscrosses. There are scars that fade and remain just as if they haven't healed once before. There are rips in souls, just as there are holes in fences and spaces between rusty metal bars. There was the persistence of memory, of love and hate, of what could have been, of what will never be and what shouldn't have been. There are blades with their owners' names on them like gravestones. There are winds that carry whispers of words left unsaid.
There was the sound of music and the gift of silence. There was the reward of life and death, of unstable or self destructive ways, of laughs and smiles. There was the ear piercing sound of glass shattering on the floor. There was the heart shattering way of saying good-bye before saying hello.
There are people to think about in the sun-kissed girl's history:
There was a blond who took the sun-kissed girl out of this world, who got under her skin. Without hesitance he told her everything about him, things that he never even knew about himself. It was he that gave her the harmony in her auburn eyes; it was he who cherished her as if she were a fragile doll.
There was the girl the blond turned to when the sun-kissed girl broke him. Her name was Cynthia. The blond was knocked unconscious, and ever since that exact moment in time the sun kissed girl has never seen him the same. It was just a walking corpse. It was just a blue-eyed star gazer needing to be loved, turning to the closest thing with a beating heart. Only, he should have reconsidered, because Cynthia most certainly does not have a heart. There is not much to say about her. She was a traitor, a deserter. A liar.
In her heart, the sun-kissed girl hopes her rival does not drain the blond.
There was the 'I'm sorry' that the blond rejected from the sun-kissed girl. There are the hateful stares. There is the silent 'I loved you' and 'I trusted you' that lived in those glances. There was burning of past kisses, there was bleeding and crying, but never did death take its toll.
Of course, maybe being with the blond was a mistake. The sun-kissed girl didn't know what she was feeling. She just wanted to be loved by someone. Perhaps, somewhere within her that she didn't know existed, she loves him more than anything or anyone.
There was the chocolate eyed one who made the sun-kissed girl new. He made her capable of love, as she did him. There were kisses; there were embraces that touched the soul. There was the break-up, the time when she didn't know what she wanted and where he couldn't recognize himself anymore. There was the apology, new kisses and hugs, their last night together where they saw and felt each other without the layers of clothes in the way, where they saw what was in one another's hearts and minds. When it was just faultless skin on top of flawless skin.
It will be true love until the end.
Until the end - the one that came much too soon.
The sun-kissed girl has a father. One that isn't as perfect as she once thought of him to be. Built strong, he never thought his weakest moment was deceiving the love of his life, the mother of his only child.
The sun kissed girl has a mother. Weakened by a life of being alone, she wouldn't accept it when the truth was murmured. She gave her husband an ultimatum. He would both leave the other woman and take her and their only daughter along to wherever his career demanded him to be, or he could stay with the other woman and never hear of or see his daughter or her for the rest of his days.
The answer, of course, was obvious. Later, the choice would disturb the sun-kissed girl, for she finds out the only reason her father picked that was because he didn't want to lose his daughter. She could never learn to return the love her father offered.
There's the present time to consider:
There are boxes in which she has packed everything. Absolutely everything, except for the one thing that matters. The tears can't stay, words can't be taken back, glances can't be exchanged, and the ending cannot be changed. Perhaps in her mind, it can be altered, but she's never had the chance to live nor dream so it is impossible to decipher reality from fantasy.
It's so simple, yet complicated.
As much as she wants to hide in that dark corner of her room, she can't. The mirror shattered. Bloody Mary can't hurt her anymore, but the memories of her can.
He, the one with chocolate eyes, stands on the curb, the sheen in his eyes replaced with the gloss of tears. The sun-kissed girl can see his heart shattering; she can feel her own throbbing with unbearable pain. She thinks of opening the car door and running to him, but she has gone numb to the fingertips.
The car slowly springs forward. Tai's eyes widen in fear. She can suddenly feel and waves her last good-bye, which he returns with a weary gesture of his own. She hoped that her father would change his mind and stop the car, but everything that he planned seems to be going right. Her only company now is the hot tears that drip down her cheeks, staining her beautiful face. There's a sting of hope for a moment when Tai runs after her in the middle of the street, but he soon tires out and stops, helpless, staring in defeat.
'I'll wait for you' seems to be reflected in his distressed eyes. She mouths an 'I love you' as the car turns the corner.
Against their wishes and dreams, that's the last they see of each other. Soon after, Tai's family moves too, and the sun-kissed girl's father does not tell her when the boy calls. He never tells his daughter when she receives letters from Tai. His name is never spoken again in the Takenouchi household.
Perhaps one day they'll bump into each other in the city streets; perhaps one day they will find each other when it's too late.
There is a raw way to say good-bye before saying hello.
In reality, there is no dark corner, nor is there anything else but it.
There is a way to remain silent yet scream.
Perhaps in her mind the ending can be altered, but the crisscrosses will fade, only to somehow remain engraved in her skin as though they never healed.
A sigh. Close those auburn eyes. Don't cry. Don't tell anyone of the sun-kissed girl's comatose heart.
I am Sora Takenouchi, and my life has fallen apart.
/Fin/
Author's notes: the end. This is the longest story I've written. Thanks for reading! If you like these kinds of stories from me, you'll be glad to know I'm writing another story - it's not as dark, but still has traces of it. You can request couples, too. For now, please review. I'd like to hear your honest opinion about the overall story. Thanks again!