Disclaimer: Teen Titans are property of DC Comics.

Author's Note: So, it's been a few years since I've even touched this story and the other day I was reading over it and saw all of these mistakes. I decided that if I am going to keep it up on my profile, then Iam going to re-write and edit this shiz. I may add some chapters to it later, who knows; either way, I do love this story – even though it's kind of mean – it always made me laugh while I wrote it.

What I am going to do is take all of the chapters down, and then post them back up once I finish editing and tweaking them a bit. I feel it's less confusing that way and also.

When I first wrote the story, there weren't too many fics out there with the same "purpose"; however, I see that over the years, there have been more added. Actually, I think I started writing this story to get a laugh out of a few of my friends – I think it worked, I can't really remember. So anyway, I hope you enjoy... I hope you get a laugh or two...or three... Feel free to leave me any reviews, those are always nice.

Original Author's Note:

THIS IS A FUNNY FIC…. NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY AT ALL… Please don't give me bad reviews saying it is cliché' and/or it's poorly written and/or whatever excuse you can think of as to why it sucks…. It is supposed to suck, you understand? It's completely satirical. This is a dedication to all those horrible fan fictions out there that don't seem to have an original plot. Cheers to you!

Robin does talk to me in this story because I am crazy; so, to make things easy for you: regular dialogue between characters is going to be in normal font…. Dialogue between Robin and I is bolded and even typed in tacky movie script form… it is pretty simple and really hard to miss.

If you even are reading this, but I can make a bet that someone is going to leave me a weird review because they didn't read this top part to know what is going on…. Let us just hope that doesn't happen or who knows, maybe they will make an appearance in the story. And trust me, it wouldn't be a good thing.

What In The World?

Chapter 1

It was a beautiful day in Jump City. Things had been peaceful for a while and Robin couldn't have woken up any happier.

"Today is the day!" he exclaimed out loud to himself. (AN: Sorry, I hate to break up the flow of this story by shoving an author's note into the middle of it, but...oh shoot! Now I've forgotten what I was going to say.)He had decided that today was the day that he was going to tell Starfire how he felt about her.

The Teen Titan's own fearless leader had been bitten by the love bug; he was bitten hard.

"I just don't know if she feels the same way about me? I know that she hugs me all the time and her happy demeanor increases exponentially whenever I'm around, but," Robin let out a deep sigh, "how do you really know when someone loves you? I just wish that someone had taken me in and trained me on how to decipher non-verbal communication; then maybe this wouldn't be just a problem."

Robin just hoped that he wouldn't lose his nerve and start stuttering like he'd never talked to a girl before – That would just be embarrassing! He silently cursed his chick-shyness. Sure, he was a virgin, but did he really have to make it that obvious?

Robin: HEY!

Me: (giggles)

"Well, it's now or never," Robin said rising out of bed and adjusted his mask. "I better go find Star."

Robin: I don't sleep in my mask.

Me: Yes you do! You never take it off, ever.

Robin: Why would I sleep in my mask?

Me: Robin, I am going to have to ask you to stop interrupting me so much. You are really breaking my flow, here.

When Robin walked out of the bedroom corridor, Beast boy and Cyborg were in the living room fighting over a video game, Raven was in her little dark corner reading a book, and Starfire was nowhere to be seen.

"She must be up on the roof," Robin thought to himself. That would actually be a good thing because then he could escape the common room before Cyborg and Beast Boy had their regular, post video game, tofu-real food wars. Tofu Yuck. How anyone, man or beast boy, could live on that stuff was beyond him.

"Hey are you looking for Starfire?" Cyborg asked, batting his eyes mockingly. "Are you going to find her so you can give her a big ol' kiss?"

"No...of course not... I just need to...give her...this...PEN, yeah this pen, that I borrowed from her earlier and I'm sure that she needs it. I mean you can't go a day without a pen...because...what if you have to...write...something..." Robin pulled on his collar while he turned into a bumbling mess at the pure mention of kissing Starfire. How was he ever going to be able to tell her that he loved her?

Robin: (groan) A pen? Really? Give me a little credit, here. I think that I am a little bit better on my feet than that. Don't you think?

Me: (glare) No.

Robin walked up to the roof and didn't see Starfire up there; he was really beginning to wonder now where she was. Maybe he should ask some of the Titans. He decided to ask Raven first because she is usually the most observant one out of the three.

"Raven have you seen Starfire around?"

"I haven't seen her this morning no. Now leave me alone and let me get back to my book, 'The Inner Demon and You' and my tea."

Robin: "The Inner Demon and You?" Are you kidding me? Is that an actual book title?

He decided that asking Beast Boy or Cyborg would be useless because the twosome were already clanging around pots and pans in the kitchen. As if on cue, he heard Starfire's beautiful, innocent voice walking through the tower doors… she wasn't alone though. She was walking with someone else. It was a guy's voice and it sounded really familiar… it was… SPEEDY'S VOICE?

Robin's eyes nearly popped out of his head. He couldn't believe it. He turned around to see the couple walk through the door. His eyes zoomed in lower and noticed that they were holding hands. HOLDING HANDS?

Robin wasn't going to stand for this. She was HIS Starfire, not Speedy's. Speedy knew this. Why would Speedy do this? He HAD to say something.

"Speedy, what're you doing here, is there a mission?"

He saw a silly grin on Speedy's face and felt like slapping it off. He needs to get that grin off of his face and realize that I mean serious business.

"Well no Robin, actually, I'm here dropping Starfire off from our date."

Robin couldn't believe his ears. A DATE? Starfire went on a DATE with Speedy? Robin squealed and stormed off in a fit of jealousy. He could not believe this! His Starfire…went on a date with Speedy.

Robin: Number one, I would never squeal; I don't squeal!

Me: Hmmm...

Robin: Number two, I'm storming off in a fit of jealousy? What is up with that? Yeah, I like her but I am not going to act like a child. What are you thinking over there? HELLO?

Me: I am thinking that if you found out that Starfire was dating Speedy, then you would storm off in a fit of jealousy. That is why I wrote it.

Robin: Plus, I know she wouldn't date Speedy...just look at him...he shoots arrows for Christ's sakes. His name is Speedy – he can't run fast! Starfire would never be able to wrap her head around that. Not to mention the fact that his uniform is like...the lamest thing ever.

Me: Robin, don't dish out fashion advice, hoookay? You used to wear underwear with feathers on them; they looked like something that Aqualad would wear as a diaper. You are totally jealous over there; just listen to yourself. It doesn't matter though, because this is MY story and you will do and say what I want you to...so no more complaining.

Robin entered his room and heard Starfire calling after him. He tried to ignore it because he really did not want to hear about her awesome date with Speedy. "She probably had a better time with him than she'd ever have with me, anyway," he huffed.

Robin: In no world, time or alternate universe would that statement ever be true. My dates are awesome.

Starfire entered his room.

"Friend Robin, what is wrong? Do you not like Speedy? I thought you and him were friends."

"He's cool Starfire I just don't want him with you." Robin took a deep breath.

"Why not Robin, is he not a good catch? He seemed nice to me? I do not think he would mistreat me." Starfire said in her innocent voice, her emerald eyes glowing with confusion.

It was now or never. "Star, I need to tell you something, but I have to warn you, me saying this may cause you to not want to be my friend any more."

"Robin what is it? Nothing you could say could ever cause that."

"Okay, here it goes, Star, uhm...uh...eee...oooo," he began to sweat profusely and he knew that the stuttering would only get worse. "...aaaa...eeee...iiii...oooo...uuuu..That's right, you!" He yelled, finally finding his voice. "I love you. I have always loved you from the first moment I saw you. I can't bear to see you going on dates with Speedy. It will tear me up inside Star. You are my world!"

"Oh Robin.."

"And if you don't feel the same way about me, the I'm afraid I'm going to have to go and jump off of the roof."

Robin: What?! Come on, I would never... change that.

Me: Why?

Robin: Just change it.

Me: Ugh, fine!

"Oh Robin..."

"And if you don't feel the same way about me, that's okay; I can live with that. Just as long as I know that we can still be friends."

Robin: Much better.

"Robin..."

Robin started to jitter with anticipation.

"I am terribly sorry but I do not enjoy your company in that way," As Robin listened to her speak, tears started to form in his eyes. "I am with Speedy now; we are in love. I am also afraid that you were correct earlier in saying that it would make me not want to be your friend anymore. Goodbye, Robin."

Robin: WAIT...Rewind...what the fuck was that, Rox?

Me: (maniacal laughter) That is my awesome ending.

Robin: No, that's not how it would go and you know damn right! Change it.

Me: I already changed it once for you.

Robin: Change it again.

Me: (frustrated growl) Fine, but this is the last time. From this point on, you only get one change per chapter and that's it. You better use it wisely.

"Robin..."

Robin started to jitter with anticipation.

"I love you too!"

"You do?" Robin sounded very surprised. Starfire? HIS Starfire loved HIM back? He was on cloud nine right now. Starfire loves me back!

"Yes, I always have but have been afraid to tell you also. Like you, I did not want to put our friendship in danger and I didn't know what would become of me and you if I told you."

"So..." Robin twiddled his thumbs. "I guess this means that we should kiss now?"

"I guess so."

Robin: I'm speechless...

Me: Then stop talking.

"Star, you have made me the happiest hero in the world!" Robin picked him up and swung her around in a circle. He put her down on the ground and looked into her big green eyes, before crashing his lips onto hers in a fiery passion. Oh, wait! I almost forgot!

"Star I want to show you something." He abruptly pulled away from the kiss and his gloved fingers tugged at the edge of his mask. "I want you to be able to see me Star. All of me, without my mask on. Is that okay with you?"

Starfire nodded.

Robin continued to take it off revealing his eyes of a clear cerulean blue color. His eyes were truly amazing. Starfire had never seen anything like them. She could easily get lost in those eyes.

"Robin, they are beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you." Robin said leaning in for another kiss. Yes. This was a great day after all.

Robin: Readers, just for the record, I so would not have done it that way. My way would have been much more debonair.

Me: Robin, do not address my readers! Bad Robin!

Robin: That is the cheesiest thing I think I've ever done...er...read that I've done...and me removing my mask to reveal my eyes?

Me: It makes the moment more meaningful if you reveal your eyes to her at the same time.

Robin: My eyes aren't even a big deal... and I'll tell you what else they're not... a clear cerulean blue; they are Sapphire blue, thank you very much. Plus, how can something be clear and blue at the same time?

Me: Well aren't you just the expert on colors now? Robin, this is my ultimate fan fiction. Just play along with it, it won't kill you. (cue Batman grunt)

May as well make this cliché' as well:

PLLLZZZZZ review! I will not upload another chapter until I get ONE HUNDRED signed reviews telling me how much they love me...(cough)...I mean my story.

On a serious note, if you actually made it to the end of this story, thank you. You are a brave soul, indeed.

(AN: Totally joking about the one hundred signed reviews part.)