Title: Just Add Water

Characters: Hitsugaya, Matsumoto, Renji, Zaraki, Byakuya and Hitsugaya's bottle of shampoo.

A/N: Don't read if you like your sanity. Worksafe, spoilersafe, unless you don't know those characters. THANK YOU kisuke for beta-ing! 333.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything here, except for the shampoo. :D

Steam rose from behind the bathroom door, where a certain Hitsugaya Toushirou happened to be taking a bath after a long day of slaughtering what seemed like half a million Hollows. His white hair had practically been immersed with the blood of the Hollows that came spurting out when Hyourinmaru pierced them. Once he had drenched himself, he instinctively reached out for his trusty shampoo he had always used since forever. It was the very essence of Hitsugaya's hair. His hair would be nothing without it's usual daily dose of the stuff.

Unknown to most people, Hitsugaya took pride and cared deeply about his hair, so you can imagine his anguish when his hand grasped thin air and found that his bottle of shampoo was gone. How would he ever get the Hollow blood out without his precious, precious hair? Some suicidal person had taken his shampoo from him. And there was only one person who had a similar respect for her hair and had enough guts to do so. Hitsugaya poked his head from behind the bathroom door as the temperature fell drastically.

"MATSUMOTO!"

Matsumoto was happily ignorant of her imminent death as she walked to the female's bathrooms. Her hands were full of her assorted toiletries, and within the pile nestled her captain's oh-so-valuable shampoo. Not only was it the perfect way to anger him, his shampoo actually was one of those that actually worked, and who wouldn't want to use it? She couldn't help but break into a (cunning) smile at the thought of the captain's face when he would find out his shampoo was gone. Sweet revenge for the ten piles of papers he had dumped on her yesterday.

Then-

"Ah, Rangiku-san! Let me help you carry your things to the bathroom!" Renji exclaimed somewhat a little too enthusiastically, suddenly appearing from out of nowhere.

Matsumoto raised one eyebrow, figured there was nothing wrong in handing her pile to Renji, and did so.

Big mistake.

Renji had dropped it the moment she handed it to him and had taken off at lightning speed. Dumbfounded, Matsumoto stared at the mess on the floor. The shampoo was missing. Hitsugaya was definitely murdering her brutally.

Wait, did that mean that Renji actually gave a hoot about his hair? And to think of all the claims that he had made about not caring at all-

"Renji! You know I'm selling this information to Kusajishi-fukutaichou!" Matsumoto yelled to the fast-retreating form of the other vice-captain.

Renji pulled into an alleyway on one of the winding streets where he was running and leaned against one of the walls there to catch his breath. The full moon illuminated the bottle of shampoo that he had just nicked from Matsumoto, that gullible sucker. She should have taken care to hide it deeper within the pile, it was sticking out in a painfully obvious manner.

Renji chuckled. He had had a hard day trying to gain his bankai, and the shampoo, which he knew Matsumoto had taken from her captain (he was the only one who had it) was just what he needed to get the grime out of his precious locks. Who knew the thugs were vain.

Anyway, while Renji was admiring the bottle (again), guess who should happen to come along but Zaraki Kenpachi. The Zaraki - I'll - kill - your - entire - division's – ass - Kenpachi. Well, to Renji, Zaraki just happened to be a dark mass walking down the alley, because if he had known who it really was, he would have stalled his reflex to throw the bottle right into Zaraki's chest. Not like it made a dent anyway.

Renji saw the figure pick up his bottle. Watched it analyse the bottle. And suddenly saw the head of Zaraki Kenpachi in the moonlight.

Crap.

Of course, Renji who thought Kenpachi was going to hang him by his toes because of the bottle, was surprised to hear him go,

"Hey, thanks Abarai. Just what I need to get the bells out of my hair," Zaraki said, cue trademark glinting-teeth.

Right. Now he had to get it back from Zaraki-taichou. Alive.

Just as he was trying to formulate something that would get him the bottle back and not cost him his life, the huff-huff of Matsumoto caused Renji to turn around.

"Found ya, asswipe! Give. Me. The. Bottle." Matsumoto had her right hand stretched out and her other was on Haineko.

Renji could only point in Zaraki's direction. Matsumoto's jaw dropped at the sight of the humungous shinigami admiring the innocent bottle in his hands. They had barely time to think when they felt a familiar temperature drop to see an infuriated Hitsugaya rounding the corner of the alley yelling,

"DAI GUREN-"

Kuchiki Byakuya closed the open door behind him as he entered his room.

If you were there you could see that he was slightly breathless, and one special bottle of shampoo was lying right next to Senbonzakura on the tatami mats. All this while chaos erupted in one of the nearby alleys. Apparently, those involved had forgotten the cause of the ruckus.

Byakuya wasn't a shyunpo master for nothing.

End.

A/N: I LOVE BLEACH SO MUCH. Thank you for reading this piece of crap! Read and review please! (x