Heehee, look who finally updated. Before I delve into the chapter I must thank romanma32, Duddley111, Judeh05, xTamarax, thatgirlyoucanttrust, VilandraofAntar and Tommy4eva. Have I mentioned that I love you guys? Because I totally do. I hope you like the new chapter, I promise for juiciness...soon. hehe

Chapter 4

So Says I

He had heard all the reasons. All the things that were wrong with him, why he was bad for her, why he couldn't find the capacity to love, why he could never care about anyone more than himself. He had known the man for long enough to know that he could barely keep a goldfish alive let alone maintain an intimate relationship.

But as Kwest stirred the deeply dark liquid, clanging the metal spoon against the stained glass, he couldn't help but think that Jude could take care of herself if she were up against Tommy. And now that the inevitable was finally being faced, he wondered if Jude was just as bad for him as he was for her. She was in a position to turn him away, to send him packing with his head between his legs. She held the power to break him so viciously that he could never be repaired. Sure he had run, more than enough times to break a girl's will, but she picked herself up. There were people who wanted to help her, people who wanted to see her happy and vibrant again.

And every time she dusted herself off from the blows that he had blasted at her, an outstanding will grew firmer and an exterior formed that Kwest could only call jaded. She was jaded, world-weary and slightly cynical. But still soft, with an edge that made her irresistible to the public and various, faceless boys who thought they could fill the void that was visible for miles.

Running a hand through his hair distractedly he thought of how long it had taken for Jude to recover from Tommy's most recent fall from grace. He had left and taken so much of her with him that everyone could see the pieces missing and if he still looked hard enough, Kwest could still see the irreplaceable pieces leaving their holes behind. He silently wondered if Tommy would be able to see them.

Letting his hand fall against the table with a clattering thud, sending the silverware flying a few inches only to fall again, he sighed heavily. Silently compiling the last year in his mind, Kwest absently wondered if Jude had yet to pick herself up. Maybe she had just been crouching and fooling everyone around her.

.o.O.o.

The December sunshine shone against his sunglasses as the dirtied snow crunched under his feet while he walked inconspicuously down the sidewalk. He found himself in front of the small café that had been the home of his obsessive ritual of mp3s, Billboard and a dopio espresso as he had told Sadie once. He watched Kwest, from one of the outdoor tables, scrolling through his cell with a furrowed brow, mug and saucer in front of him and his feet crossed tightly at his ankles beneath the table.

Closing the distance to the door, he couldn't help but wonder who he was calling. Shaking himself lightly, expelling his thoughts, Tommy smiled to himself before pushing on the door; he was greeted with the soft tinkle of a bell that alerted Kwest.

The two gazes locked from a moment, despite the cover of Tom's glasses, before they broke into grins. Kwest got up from the table, cradling his phone in one hand and clapping Tommy on the back with the other. "Hey T." He greeted lightly as Tommy smiled in response.

Joining him at the table Tommy shifted, waiting for Kwest to ask. He had rehearsed what he was going to tell Jude, all begging and excuses laid out in his head while he had no idea what to tell his best friend. "Wanna tell me where you were man?" Kwest posed lightly as if he had been asking what Tommy decided to name his cat. "Look man, I didn't want to leave. But I needed to. I had to." He started, immediately putting up his defense. "I'm not accusing you of anything. But what could possibly make you up and leave like that, without a goodbye. And telling Jude that you wouldn't be coming back?"

Tommy sighed; he had figured as much that Jude would confide in someone. He silently thanked anyone who was listening that she hadn't gone to Portia. Or Sadie. And without thinking past the need for an ally, he bit the bullet. "I have a daughter man." Tommy ground out, his fingers reaching out to fidget with the tassel at the edge of the tablecloth. Kwest's sputters registered softly in his head but the clanging of the glass of his cup made him look up. Eyes wide with shock and incomprehension, Kwest's jaw sank as coffee spilled from his lips. "Pick up you jaw man." Tommy called lightly, watching as his friend shock his head a few times before placing his palms face down against the table. "Did I hear you right?" "What did you hear?" "That you have a daughter." "You didn't hear wrong."

.o.O.o.

He knocked against the old wood of the door, waiting for Jude to open it. He raised his hand to knock again, a jitter of nerves swirling, untamed, in his stomach. He didn't know why he was feeling apprehensive but a shot of adrenaline pumped through his pounded veins as the door opened.

Her hand still on the doorknob, she gasped deeply, sending chills down his spine and whirl of cold breath into the wintry air. Releasing her grip on the brass knob she paced forward, her small steps rocking his balance as a hand reached out to graze his cheek. "What happened?" She breathed in a whisper. He let out a soft grunt, scoffing at the memory. "You should see the other guy." He told her, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close.

Huddling in his warmth, she raised a brow and cocked her head at the mention of someone else. She didn't really think he had fought a wall or fallen out of a tree, but she expected a lame excuse. "What other guy." "I think you might know him." He told her softly, pushing his lips to hers tenderly. She broke away, her lips motionless, her eyes blazing. "Who is he?" She almost demanded, but stopped her interrogation short as a car door slammed from her driveway. A bluntly blue tint reflecting against the pure snow made a soft gasp hitch in her throat. "Tommy?" She questioned absently as Colin pulled away from her to see.