Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. Seriously, I don't even own ONE COPY of the stupid books! I'm poor!

Once Upon a Friday…Gone Terribly Wrong

Summary: A party goes horribly awry, Ichigo and Rukia get locked in a closet, Uryu dons another cape, and all-around insanity ensues. Not much of a summary, eh? You'll have to read to find out what happens…keh heh heh.

Brought to you by KingdomRaindrops

A humorous…albeit weird…story to waste your time reading.

Like the above subtitle says, it was 7:14 PM on an ordinary Friday night. Ichigo sat on his couch, watching a court show on TV.

If you haven't' guessed by that 'court show' implication, he was bored.

Ichigo had thought it would be somewhat peaceful with his father and sisters gone on a camping trip. He'd somehow got out of it last-minute by saying he had some stuff to study for. Which wasn't REALLY lying, since he did have to train, and, well, that's kind of studying, right?

Suddenly, the phone rang. Ichigo grabbed it without looking and pressed the 'talk' button.

"Kurosaki…ah, whatever. Who is it and what do you want?" Ichigo, as usual, wasted no time on proper greetings.

"Hey hey hey, it's Ichigo, my main man!" came the voice from the other end.

Filled with horror, Ichigo realized too late who was on the other end. "K-Keigo?"

"Hey, you got it right on the first try!" Keigo was once again acting high.

Ichigo sighed. "What do you want?"

"Well, I'd like-"

"I'm here too, Ichigo!" came the voice of Mizurio, cutting Keigo off.

"Heeeeeeeeeeeey." Keigo's whining could be heard from the background.

"Ichigo, your dad's gone for the weekend, right?" Mizurio, unlike Keigo, got straight to the point.

"Uh-huh." Ichigo did not like where this was going.

Just as he feared. "Let's have a party at your place!" That, of course, was Keigo.

"NO!"

"Awwwwwwwwww," whined Keigo. "Why not?"

"Because the last thing I need is for the police to come to my house," said Ichigo flatly.

"You're so mean!" sobbed Keigo.

Suddenly, there was a loud clatter as someone ran down the stairs. Was it a burglar? Ronald McDonald? Or Keigo, using his magical teleportation powers? And…which one is scarier?

Thank goodness, Ichigo did not have to find out. For it was none of those horrors. No, it was a different horror altogether.

"Ichigo, are you on the phone? It's Keigo, isn't it? I can hear his whining all the way from here. Is there anything to eat in this house, anyway? Ichigo, I'M HUNGRY."

Yes. It was Rukia! DUN DUN DUNNNN!

Hearing the doorbell ring, Ichigo dragged himself off the couch and shot Rukia a 'look'. By 'look', I mean, 'a look intended to cause the receiver pain or ultimately death'.

"I saw that, Ichigo." Rukia didn't miss a beat. "It's not my fault you have weak principles and can't stand your ground."

Ichigo could hear Rukia snickering as he walked slowly, slowly, slowly, to the door.

"ICHIGO! LET US IIIIIIIN!" came Keigo's whine.

"Ichigo, we're COLD out here!" sniffled Mizurio.

"Plus, we brought some friends!"

"Yoo-hoooooo!"

Orihime!

Ichigo was sure if Orihime was there, Tatsuki and Chad were, too. And he was right. But when he opened the door, one extra visitor was standing there.

"…Uryu…?" Ichigo squinted at the clearly irritated person.

"Yes, Kurosaki, it's me. But don't get any ideas, okay? I was practically kidnapped." Uryu pushed his glasses up.

"Aw man, Ichigo, let us in!" Keigo bowled Ichigo over. The rest followed him inside.

A very surprised-looking Rukia sat on the couch. "What are they-"

"Ah, the ever lovely Rukia!" Keigo sang. "We're having a party!"

"…party?" This came from Ichigo.

"Why of course, Ichigo, you sly dog. Don't play dumb!" Keigo bounced around the room. "I even brought sodas! And popcorn! And a scary movie! And a boom-box! And loud CDs! And-"

Ichigo shut Keigo up by smacking him in the face. Mizurio gave Ichigo a thumbs-up.

"I love parties!" Orihime sighed, sparkling. "With the clowns…and the face-paint…and the wild animals…oh, but what if there was a space-man too! And he could be fighting an alien! Oh, run, alien, run!" The she started humming 'It's a Small World'.

The room grew awkwardly silent, except for that humming.

Tatsuki coughed. "Yeah, well, I'm hungry. Who's buying the pizza?"

Rukia perked up at this word. She LOVED pizza. "Ichigo's buying!" she sang, shoving the phone at him.

"I'm what?" Ichigo was bewildered. He had no clue what was going on at the present moment.

"Good boy, Ichigo!" laughed Keigo. "What a gentleman! Buying pizza for his good friends! We appreciate it, and I'd say we'd pay you back, but…the truth is, we wouldn't." Still laughing, he walked into the kitchen to put the soda in the refrigerator.