Bear's Secret Life

A/N: Review. Um…yeah

Disclaimer: I don't own this show, but the owners might leave their jobs after reading this.

The night was young. The bear was black- no actually he was orange but he was wearing black, so who gives. The truth is Bear is really Goth. Bear went to the balcony to talk to Luna.

"Luna, I'm sorry but we must split up. Now that I am doing…you know I can't have you in my way. Everywhere I go, you are always watching," apologized Bear.

"You butt hole!" cried Luna.

"You're the butt munch! I can't believe I ever went out with you! God!" Bear shouted back.

Bear pulled on his black beanie and sulked inside the Big Blue House. Now you understand why it's "Bear in the Big Blue House"! Ya!

Bear locked his door on the way out. He knew what he was doing was wrong, but he was sick of the flippin cameras always following him around in his house. Maybe if he stopped the children…he could stop the cameras. He pulled out his saw. Duh Duh Duuuuuuun. He was ready to stop this once and for all.

He trudged through a swamp, through a valley, and to a gas station where he got gasoline and lunchables. His first victim was Timmy Townsend, his first viewer. He was located on Harper Avenue. When Bear reached Timmy Townsend's house he could hear him being tucked in. Bear kicked open the front door and let out a bear roar.

"RAAA! I AM COMING TO EAT YOOOOOUUU!" Bear shouted

"Mommy my show's on!" Timmy Townsend exclaimed with delight, with no awareness that this bear was about to saw off his head and burn the house down.

Bear walked unsteadily down the hall, swaying drunkenly. "RAAAAAA!"

"I think it is the adult swim Bear in the Big Blue house, Timmy," His mother warned right before the door to Timmy Townsend's room was slammed down.

"RAAAAAA! DIIIE!" Bear shouted.

"I think someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning!" said Timmy's mother, giggling.

Bear turned on the cordless saw and swung it around. He then lunged at Timmy. No more will be said. Just know there was no body for a funeral. Millions of children died that week, from Suzy Stewart, to Courtney Keene. Bear was living large. He had no more cameras following him around his house, and he got back together with Luna. There was just one more child…Jessica Jones.

Bear walked to her house. It was his last victim.

Jessica was swimming in her pool. She didn't even suspect a giant man-or should we say bear-dressed in black breaking open her gate. As Bear climbed on to the diving board, turning on his saw, and laughing maniacally, she screamed in horror. Bear jumped into the water, sending waves crashing into her face. She tried to run away, but she felt a searing pain in her leg, Water around her was turning red. Where was her mother, you ask? She was inside, glued to the TV because a new episode of "Starting Over" was on NBC. Jessica shrieked for her mother, but no answer came. She felt another ripping sensation at her hip. Everything went black. The pain was too much to bear. Get it? Bear! Jessica never found out found out what happened next. So we'll tell you!

After sawing her hip, Bear went for her back. He could taste the blood in his mouth. Funnily enough, it tasted like McDonald's French fries. He turned her around and saw her face. Her expression seemed to be forever molded into the look of pain. And her face was forever molded into his mind.

He took her to the edge of the pool and dried her off. Now, his favorite part: He took out the gasoline and poured it all over her body. Then, he took out the match, and lit it on fire. Lastly, he threw it on her body and watched her go up in flames.

This part of Bear's murder scene was usually Bear's favorite. But the sight of Jessica's face was too much. He felt the guilt of so many children's deaths. He staggered towards the pools edge and fell in. He faded away…never knowing the reaction of the readers that are reading this Fic.