This is what some people would consider a 'prologue' to a Loveless-based Digimon fic. However, while this scene is written out in my mind and has been driving me crazy since I picked up the Loveless manga two weeks ago. If you don't know anything about Loveless, there are just three things you need to know to understand this fic: 1) everyone in the world is born with cat ears and a tail, which they loose the moment they've lost their 'innocence' (wink wink). 2) to compete in magical battles, the two sides must both be made of two people, a Fighter Unit, who casts spells using his words, and a Sacrifice, who gives his power to his partner. And finally, 3) Septiminal Moon is a mysterious organization from the manga. I have no idea who they are either, which is why I'm stopping here for now, and may continue this little midnight sleep avoidance once I get a better handle on this world's main villains.
WARNINGS: This thingy contains assisted self-mutilation, lots of angst, and what may very well be Koukou shonen-ai, though it could also be extremely devoted brotherly affection, depending on how you interrupt it. So…be warned, and don't flame. Eikichi collects them, and nobody wants to know what he does with them…
Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon, nor do I own anything to do with 'Loveless'. I'm just obsessed with both, and this scene is driving me crazy…
Balance
The rain was pouring down outside the window, but neither of the boys inside the small, shadowed room seemed to take any notice. The room itself had almost nothing in it, save two futons and a few boxes, packed and ready for an impending move. The boys were crouched on a sheet they had spread over the ground, very close to each other but far from anything else in the room, save the soft glow of the streetlight outside shifting in through the window despite the storm.
The shorter-haired of the two boys, older than his twin by mere minutes, bit his lip anxiously as he gazed at his brother across the sheet. The black cat-ears perched amidst his short, dark hair twitched anxiously, the long black tail curled around his ankles in a nervous manner. "Are…Are you sure about this, Kouji?"
"You don't want to do it?" His brother asked, slipping his ponytail behind his shoulder. Behind him, an identical black tail was twitching just a little with every crash of thunder.
"I…I don't want to…h-hurt…"
"Nii-san, it's all right." Kouji looked at his twin kindly, putting a hand over the clutched fist resting near his right knee. "If you can't do it, it's all right. There's bound to be another way, somehow. Maybe I'll find another person with our name who'd be willing…"
Kouichi looked up at him, his eyes watering. "You know…I couldn't bear that, Kouji."
Kouji smiled gently. "I know. Neither could I."
Kouichi smiled softly, but his eyes still held a hesitant expression. "But Kouji…are you sure this is the only way to do it? I mean…do I have to…"
"Kouichi." Kouji's features were serious and a bit harsh, but he tried his very hardest to keep a kind gaze in his eyes as he leaned closer to his brother. "Yes, I'm sure. You're not built for battling, you wouldn't survive being the Fighter Unit. It has to be me."
"B-But I…" Kouichi looked back down at his hand, still covered by his brother's. "I don't want to hurt you. I don't…"
"You won't." Kouji squeezed the top of his brother's hand once more. "But you have to do this, Kouichi. You want to find out what happened to mom, right?"
"Of course I do…"
"And we've both agreed this is the right way." Kouji stressed, releasing his brother's hand. "You'll be the Sacrifice, I'll be your Fighter Unit. You have to Mark me to make the contract work."
He turned away from his older brother for a moment, reaching down to nimbly pull the thin blue shirt over his head. He tossed it away, watching it flutter off into the darkness before turning back around. Kouichi was fingering the scalpel anxiously, its silver blade flashing in the moonlight. The elder brother's fingers were hesitant as it checked the sharpness of the blade, taking care not to cut himself as he did.
His dark eyes turned to scan over Kouji's bare arms, shoulders and chest. "Where…Where should it go?"
Kouji slid a bit closer and offered the upper part of his left arm. "It'll be easy to reach, and easier to hide."
"All right…"
Kouichi reached out and took his brother's wrist, stretching the arm out as he lowered the hand to the sheet. The skin on the arm stretched to its most taunt, especially where the muscles rippled on the upper arm.
"Okay…" The elder twin took a deep breath, reaching out with the scalpel still clutched in his hand. His arm shook a bit, but he tried to hold it steady as it got closer to his brother's skin. "Here it goes…"
Kouji suddenly reached up with his free hand and seized his brother's wrist. Kouichi's took in a sharp gasp and froze, afraid he might have hurt him already.
"If you don't open your eyes, you're going to make a mistake."
"O-oh…"
Kouichi forced his eyes open, his gaze meeting that of his brother. Kouji smile and nodded, his cat-ears perked in a normal, calm position as his tail curled around Kouichi's other wrist comfortingly. The elder brother had his ears pressed against the top of his head, biting his lip as his tail swished back and forth uneasily.
"O-Okay then…" He gulped, forcing his eyes to stay open as he leaned in again, Kouji's hand steadying his shaking wrist. "H-Here it goes…"
The skin gave way rather easily under the sharp knife, and soon the blood began to flow. Kouji didn't said a word, but his brother began sobbing quietly, tears rolling down his cheeks even as he added more and more strokes to their 'art'.
"B…"
Careful positioning, another few slices, working into jagged corners and ragged, blocky letters of gooey red blood.
"A…"
Kouichi choked out another sob as the blood rolled down his brother's arm, dripping onto the sheet below them. He paused a moment to wipe the tears away on his sleeve, then continued with the grisly work.
"L…A…"
Kouji kept his breathing firm and even, trying to keep on a calm front for his nervous brother, but the stinging pain of each new slice was starting to get to him. His long, black tail twitched anxiously, waiting for it to be over.
"N…C…"
Kouichi could hardly see what he had done for all the blood now, the smeared, sticky red that was now flowing freely and dripping in a painful, measured rhythm. His tears flowed freely as well, joining the blood to stain the previously-white sheet as he finished the last letter.
"E…"
A long slash underlined the finished word and the scalpel was thrown to the ground. Kouichi dove for a towel and wrapped it around his brother's arm desperately. "We've got to…We've got to stop the bleeding!" He sobbed, tightening the towel like a tourniquet.
"Kouichi…"
"I'm sorry!" Sobbed the slightly-older boy, gripping the towel tightly, soaking up his brother's blood. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm…"
Kouji reached out with his free hand, the one belonging to the undamaged arm, and cupped his brother's chin in the crook of his thumb. He leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on the other boy's cheek, a warm and gentle expression of devotion and love.
Kouichi gasped and snapped his eyes open, his breathing short and hesitant, gulping in air as his hands relaxed over the inflicted wound. Kouji's mild smirk turned into a loving smile as he pulled back, gently stroking the cheek he had kissed with his fingers.
"I'm yours, big brother." He whispered, his tail wrapping warmly around the other's ankle. "Now and forever. Nobody can separate us, not now, and not ever."
Kouichi sniffed lightly, his ears twitching, leaning closer to see his brother's face in the pale moonlight. "You promise?"
"Promise."
Kouji let go of his brother's face and wrapped his arms around the other's shoulders instead, pulling Kouichi close so that the older brother's head against his chest. Kouichi took the invitation and snuggled closer, his own black tail curling around the two boys. The blood, slowed to a mild trickle that could barely move down the now-sticky skin.
"Forever, for never." Kouji whispered again, running a hand through his brother's hair and gently scratching behind one of the black kitty-ears. "I'll be here for you, whenever you need me. Forever."
"Me too." Kouichi whispered, pulling himself just a little bit close. "Forever."
And outside the window, the rain kept pouring down.
Owari
Okay, yeah…That's what happens when Gemini Star doesn't get enough sleep…or gets too much…or something. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it in all its stupidly complicated-ness.