Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Real Love
Chapter 7
It's a quiet night. White eyes stared at the moon above. The Hyuuga district is so peaceful that only the swaying of the humungous trees could be heard.
"Naruto-kun.." Hinata said quietly to herself. She's at the top of the highest tree that you could almost see the whole village. Houses are twinkling with colorful lights, all mixed with the color of the white snow on the ground below. It's a beautiful sight.
She felt like betraying mother nature for feeling the opposite.
She felt the cold air and she hugged her knees closer to herself, her long hair dancing with the wind. Her mind is still on the fox boy.
Naruto always made it a point to visit her whenever he's in a break from his missions or whenever he's having some free time. There never came a day where the both of them would not see each other if their schedules let them to. They never let a day pass.. ever..
Except for this day.
She was expecting him to come and pick her up hours ago, expecting to have a wonderful and eventful day with him. But he did not come. Yes, she knows that he had an important meeting with the Hokage today but surely that meeting wouldn't have lasted for the whole day would it?
She looked at the village of Konoha sadly. She thought about Naruto's meeting. She had a feeling that the meeting is all about Sakura. She had a feeling that Naruto already knows what happened to his former teammate.
And that caused him to forget all about her, doesn't it?
She sighed.
Stop being so selfish, she told herself inwardly.
Selfish? I'm not supposed to be the one to be blamed here, that tiny voice inside her head said.
She closed her eyes and tried to stop herself from feeling so.. so jealous..
Sakura..
Her heart twisted a little at the thought of her. She knows that Sakura is very important to Naruto, knows that Sakura had been his inspiration for a long time coming. She knows that they have shared many experiences and precious moments with each other, together with Kakashi and Sasuke. But hell, you can't blame her for feeling so damn jealous of the attention that the fox boy gives the pink-haired kunoichi can you? That attention that she had fought to obtain for so many, many years that Sakura can get for only a second or a single plea.
She can't help but to think that Sakura would always be the first inside his heart.
And she'd always be only second.
Her eyes start to water. Why does she always have to make things hard for herself?
She thought that when the two of them started going out together, Naruto would strive to give her more attention than he does to Sakura. She thought that she's gonna be the more important one. She thought that everything that he does to Sakura, he would now do to her.
She thought so wrong. Naruto obviously gave her a whole lot of notice compared to their genin days but his care and attention to Sakura, however, did not change and, if possible, it even became more profound.
Don't get her wrong, of course Sakura is her friend and she doesn't mean her any harm. She's not saying that she's wishing Sakura into a bad situation, especially now that she's in jeopardy. It's just that, she had waited so long for this opportunity and still, Naruto's attention is not completely unto hers. Completely selfish, she knows, but isn't it supposed to be that way? They are going out, right?
To add up to the jealousy she's feeling, hadn't Uzumaki Naruto been the biggest admirer of Haruno Sakura especially during their genin days?
What if that 'admiration' is still there and sweet Naruto just needs to realize it before he comes running back to the cherry blossom, seeking her affection like the old times? What is she supposed to do? What's gonna become of her?
Naruto told her that he and Sakura were just friends. But hell, the immediate change of his moods when Sakura is brought up and his constant thoughts about the Haruno girl even if he's with her makes Hinata doubt so much if Naruto's feelings for Sakura is merely just as 'friends' as he calls it.
He always worries about Sakura, always wanted to make sure if she's alright. He doesn't want her to be alone even for just a second! Hinata doesn't understand.. she really doesn't.. she just hopes that someday she can.. how she aches for that day to come..
Of course, she doesn't say these things to him. What if he goes away from her? She doesn't want that surely. She had gone a long way to make him notice her. She'd rather endure this kind of relationship with him, even if it's not completely honest and passionate as she dreamed it would be.
Even if it's killing her.
What is it about Sakura that keeps Naruto going? What does Sakura have that she doesn't? Is it power? No offense but, Hinata's an ANBU when Sakura isn't even one. Is it beauty? Not to brag or anything, but she's beautiful in her own way. Is it personality? If it is, then she's gonna lose this game..
She can't change herself! What if it drives Naruto even farther away from her? If he likes Sakura's personality more than hers, then she can't do anything about it..
Besides, Naruto always tells her that he likes her the way she is. Why would she risk that? She's so scared of change because she's so scared of losing him..
But she can't deny that she always feels complete whenever they're together. A day with Naruto is always full of fun that it makes her forget all about her forbidden jealousy. And at night, she thinks of all the things they have done together and a good night sleep is assured followed with a wonderful morning. Only he can make her feel this way. Only Naruto..
She's willing to do anything for him, just like how Sakura is willing to do anything for Sasuke.
She just wants Naruto to be happy.
It hurts Hinata, knowing that if Naruto ever decided to come back to Sakura, it wouldn't matter to her. Cause all that matters for Sakura is Uchiha Sasuke. Even though Sakura tries to hide it, Hinata can see right through her. She still loves the Uchiha prodigy. Why?
Maybe because she loves him too much, just like how Hinata loves the fox boy.
Both of them are so willing to give anything.
For Hinata, it will always be Naruto. For Sakura, it will always be Sasuke.
But for Naruto and Sasuke.. who the hell knows..
How she wished that all of this would be simple.
She opened her eyes and wiped the tears rolling down her cheeks. It's stupid and immature to mourn about Naruto just because he forgot to pick her up, or so she hopes. She shouldn't have expected that he would always have time for her. She shouldn't have expected anything in the first place anyway.. it will hurt more than it usually does..
Besides, she has to understand Naruto's frail state at the moment. Sakura is one of the most important people in his life. She stood up to him whenever there's trouble and they shared so many moments that even Hinata can't measure up to. Sakura is important for Naruto and she'd have to understand that! Yes it hurts, but seeing Naruto happy will make it all worthwhile..
As she said, she's willing.
She stood up and jumped down to take a walk. A long walk around the village would be nice, she thought.
"Where are you going?" said a familiar voice.
She turned around to see Neji with his hands inside his pockets, face impassive as always. Neji likes his long strolls at night. He says it makes him calm especially when unwanted thoughts are bothering him. Hinata tries to believe him, seeing Neji having his strolls at night always with a face so serious makes her doubt if he really is calm. Hinata tried to fake a smile.
"Just gonna walk around.. you wanna come with me Neji-san?"
A pause. Neji seems to be thinking.
"No.. I'm gonna head home.." he said quietly as he started to walk again.
Phew. Of course she didn't want Neji to come along. She just said it out of respect for him. She wanted to be alone. Besides, walking with Neji is no difference with you walking alone. You don't expect him to strike up a conversation would you? It will only lead you into feeling insecure.
Hinata tried to fake a smile again and looked over the trees surrounding the both of them.
"Be careful and don't be too late.." Neji suddenly said.
Hinata was taken off-guard. She didn't expect him to say that.
"Uhm.. you.. you too.. Neji-san.."
He stopped walking and turned slightly towards her direction. They both looked at each other.
"Hn"
He's walks again.
"Don't let that dobe worry you too much.. it's not worth it.." he said as he rounded a corner and out of sight.
Hinata stared at the direction where Neji went for a few seconds and chuckled.
"Yes.. he had been a great part of our lives.. hadn't he Neji-san.."
She stared at the ground and let her mind drift off again, letting her feet drag her wherever they want to go. Everything is so lively, betraying her feelings, especially when she reached the marketplace.
A few minutes later, she found herself into the gates of Konoha. She sat at the bench as if waiting for someone.
She doesn't know why, but her instincts are telling her to wait. Just wait.
It's getting quite late and the cold air is threatening her sensitive skin. Still, she waited.
Her instincts had been correct.
She felt a presence coming. She turned her head and saw a shocking yellow-colored hair that seems to stand out of the dark and cold surroundings. A black and orange suit.. and electric blue eyes..
Naruto.
She saw a lump at his back.
A bag pack. No.. he can't..
She stood up to meet him, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open.
They came face to face. Naruto stopped a few feet away from her. His face is full of seriousness and exhaustion. They both looked at each other.
"Naruto.. kun.."
You just can't believe her shock.
Naruto had been walking around the village, not really taking any notice of his surroundings. He had just gone from the meeting with the Hokage. It's already 6 PM and the stalls and houses are beginning to open their colorful christmas lights. It took him an awful lot of time to convince the Hokage to look for Sakura himself. He even missed lunch. But he doesn't care. He doesn't feel hungry anyway..
The Fifth, although very much against it, considered Naruto's pleas and at the end, decided to go with it. It took Naruto hours of reasoning and begging just to do so. However, it goes with one condition. He was not to leave the village immediately, he's only allowed to leave when not much people are around so that not much attention would be caused. Only Konoha officials and Teams 7,8,9 and 10 knows about Sakura's disappearance. The Fifth decided that he leaves in at least when the clock says 9 PM. Of course being Naruto, he complained. That's an awful lot of time! Sakura might have no chance of living! He tried to make the Hokage bring the condition back but it stood useless when she slammed her fist at the table and told him that if he's not gonna comply, he might as well don't go. That shut him up for good but you can't say that he's not frustrated. He's wasting too much time.. and he can't afford that! Right now, time is precious.. especially for Sakura..
The Fifth tried to explain her reasons. She said that she also wanted Sakura to be found but she can't afford to cause too much attention or people will bring up too much rumors about Sakura. And, worst of all, people will think that Konoha's ANBU is unreliable. She said that she wanted Sakura to live, who wouldn't, but being Hokage, she can't risk the village for her own selfish reasons. She tried to explain.. but none of it entered Naruto's head..
Naruto tried to seek for his sensei's help but only got an exasperated sigh as an answer. He said that if he really wanted to look for Sakura, might as well agree with the Hokage's condition. He also said that he's lucky that the Hokage even said yes to his offer.
Of course Kakashi would love to come with the fox boy. But that would be asking for too much. It's dangerous, said Tusnade a moment ago when she was trying to convince Naruto not to go. Only one of them can go or else neither will. They can't take the attempt of risking more Konoha officials especially now that many reports from ANBU spies are suspecting that the Sound is preparing to wage a war. Obviously, Naruto won't be expected to be left behind.
Naruto's feet dragged him to the bridge where Team 7 used to meet up. For a moment, he imagined all four of them in this bridge just like the old times. Sasuke would be leaning in that side of the bridge, Sakura would be on the opposite side.. and then he'd come, waving his hand frantically and saying ohayou or whatever.. and then their perverted sensei would puff out of nowhere and he and Sakura would scream the usual as Kakashi tried to explain why he's late again.. those were the old times..
The images seemed so real to Naruto's head that he could almost hear themselves laughing at each other.. then suddenly, the image of Sasuke disappeared into thin air. Naruto's eyes widened a bit. After Sasuke, it was Sakura who came next, her image disappearing together with her sweet laughter. Naruto reached out his hand and took a step forward, trying to prevent her from going. And then Kakashi-sensei followed suit, reminding him that all was just an illusion. He found himself alone yet again with only the cold wind and rustling of leaves as his company.
He sighed as he went to the usual place of Sasuke and looked over the water. He saw his reflection and stared at it until a leaf landed on the exact spot and shook the calm water a bit. It's not the same without them. How he wished that they'd both be back. An image of them flashed inside his head as the wind silently hums a tune in his ears. It's too quiet. Why would they leave him, both of them, here all alone.. in this bridge..
His genin days had been the best years of his life. He wished that it had never ended.
A loud, drunken voice coming from the end of the bridge distracted him.
"Oi! Naruto!"
He looked over the source of the voice.
"Jiraiya.."
The sannin walked over to his student, almost tripping on every step, and gulped down more sake that is being clutched by his left hand. Naruto wished he'd go away. He wanted to be alone.
"What are you doing here all alone boy? You should be having some fun! Hah! Come on its almost Christmas! You should be wasting your time into parties and get togethers! Fooooooorrrr he's a jolly good fellow! He's a jolly good fellow!! For he's a JOLLY GOOD FEEELLLOOOWWW!!!!!"
Jiraiya gulped more sake and sang more Christmas songs, all of them usually out of tune. Naruto furrowed his eyebrows and tried to ignore him, staring at the calm river again with a hostile face. He certainly did not have time to joke around with a drunken Jiraiya.
A few minutes later, Jiraiya gave a hearty sigh and stopped singing as he noticed the fox boy's face. He took down a big last gulp from his sake bottle and kept it. Sober or not, Naruto doesn't know. He doesn't really care..
"Ahhh.. nothing beats sake.." he said in a contented voice.
Naruto saw the reflection of Jiraiya's back leaning on the rail of the bridge. A few minutes of silence passed them by. Just a few more hours and he'll leave this damn of a village to search for Sakura. Just a few more hours..
"You know.. it's not like you to have a face like that.."
He averted his gaze to look at the perverted sannin. Damn it how he wishes that he'd just go away..
"Heard about what happened to Sakura.."
He looked back at the calm water below. Well, guess he's sober enough to start a decent conversation, which is a little awkward for he had just proven himself high on sake just a few minutes ago, waving and singing like a dolt.
The cold winter wind brushed past them and the sky above is starting to lose that calm blue color being replaced by velvet black.
Just a few more hours..
"I'm sorry.." Jiraiya suddenly said.
Naruto could hear the rustling of the leaves at his feet. The hell, sorry for what!
"You don't have to say sorry.. Sakura's not yet.. dead.."
"Naruto.."
"What? It's true right? Sakura-chan isn't.. she's not.. I mean.. she's not d-dead.. Why are you guys always assuming that she is!"
Jiraiya gave him a sympathetic look. Naruto, however, could feel his anger bursting out of him.
"Naru-"
"Will you just leave me alone? I don't wanna talk right now.." he said as he bowed his head down and stared at his reflection again.
Jiraiya sighed.
"If that's what you want.. Naruto.."
He started to walk into the side of the bridge where he came from without looking back. Naruto watched him. It was disrespectful to scream at his sensei like that, but his emotions got the best of him. He knows Jiraiya was just trying to help..
Guess for now he's as helpless as he can be..
"Oi! Naruto!" Jiraiya shouted suddenly.
"Just be careful okay.. I'll see you as soon as you get back here! Hn, now don't die on me boy.. It will be an embarrassment, my one and only student dying on a rescue mission.. girls don't dig that.." Jiraiya said casually, and he was gone.
Naruto chuckled. What a perverted old man that Jiraiya is..
Naruto walked towards his apartment in silence and opened the door. He turned on the lights and immediately went upstairs to pack. He turned on the lights in his room and went for his big, double knobbed cabinet. He got all the things that he thinks is necessary like extra clothes, of course, weapons, bandages, first aid kits and some scrolls. After getting all the things he needed, Naruto walked over his single bed which is adjacent to his big window that is opened, letting the cold wind he had met earlier pass through. He placed all his clothes on his bed and began to fit it all in his bag pack. He wanted to arrange it nicely but he has no time. He just wants to get out of here as soon as possible.
Once all his things are inside the bag pack, he turned to leave. He hoped he's not too late. He turned his head to the clock at his bedside table. It's already 8:55. His eyes then traveled to the old picture frame that he had treasured for so many years just beside his clock. His eyes softened as he stares at it. He could see himself grinning like an idiot.. he could see Kakashi-sensei's smile even behind that mask of his.. he could see Sasuke's serious face.. he chuckled a little.. when will that guy soften up, he thought.. and then he saw Sakura at the middle smiling that cheerful smile of hers..
He could feel his blood boiling.
"I swear.. I swear that I will find you Sakura-chan.. I swear.. I won't give up.. I won't.. so please.. please.. wait for me.." he said quietly, talking to the picture.
He slammed the door shut and headed downstairs.
He went over to his kitchen and grabbed some portable ramen. He might need it, who knows. He took a couple of it, assuming that Sakura might like some too when he finds her. He also took some rice balls and put them in a small container. He put it inside his bag with much difficulty and went to head for the door.
He was about to turn the knob when he suddenly caught eye of something in the living room.
It was in an old but pleasant wooden frame and he could remember clearly what time of the year it was. Beautiful pink cherry blossoms dancing with the wind as their background and genuine smiles plastered upon their faces, it was almost perfect. To add up to it, it was his birthday at that time. He remembered Hinata asking him what kind of birthday present he would like to have and he said to her that it doesn't have to be anything grand. Then she suddenly grabbed him by the arm and dragged him to the park, saying that it's his special day he should be having fun. They spent the whole day together just fooling around the park and taking pleasures to their beautiful surroundings. The cherry blossoms were soothing and had a wonderful scent and the ground was covered in dashing pink petals. The whole day was full of laughter and pleasure. Hinata suddenly had an idea and unexpectedly asked him what he thinks is his most favorite part of the park was. Naruto, not really knowing where this is going, randomly picked a place where a big tree of cherry blossom stood. You could see the pink petals falling from the tree showering the whole park, it was an astonishing site. Hinata squeaked in delight and said in a high-pitched voice the word 'perfect'. When they got to the tree, Hinata took something out from her pocket and it turned out to be a camera. She randomly picked an old but nice looking man then asked him nicely to take a picture of them both. The old man kindly said yes, telling them what a nice couple they are.
Hinata clung to Naruto's right arm and put up a 'peace sign', posing for the camera. Naruto, rather surprised at Hinata's sudden idea of taking a picture of them both, put a sheepish grin with his left hand behind his head and looking rather timid for he had not taken pictures that often. His cheeks are a little reddish, feeling Hinata at a close proximity makes him nervous.
The picture turned out fine, much to Naruto's relief. He did look a little awkward but at least he didn't look like a dolt. It was their first picture together as couples and he remembered Hinata saying how lovely it turned out. The blue sky above them, pink rosy petals showering them instead of rain, and their blissful expressions reflecting what they feel for each other inside, it is indeed, almost perfect. He would never forget that day.
Naruto stared at the picture, taking in every detail of it as he did so often. The picture turned out to be Hinata's present for him that day, saying that she can't think of anything else to give and that ramen seems to be too common already for almost everybody in the village already gave him a whole pack. He treasured it with all his heart..
He looked down and felt his guilt running throughout his body. He should really pay her a visit and explain everything to her, of course including his mission to rescue Sakura but he's running out of precious time and he's quite sure that she will stop him from leaving the village too. It was selfish of him, not thinking about her feelings when he committed himself to her. He knows that it's hurting her every time he worries about his former teammate, every time he talks about her whenever they're together.. but she doesn't understand what Sakura had gone through.. she doesn't know what happened to Sakura's parents.. she doesn't know the anguish that his former teammate feels every time Sasuke is mentioned.. she doesn't know but Naruto does.. Sakura needed him more than ever..
He knows that Hinata is a good person and only if she's fully aware of the sufferings Sakura had gone through, she'd be the most supportive girlfriend anyone can ever have especially for Naruto, and of course for Sakura also.
But he can't tell her. Why? Two things. It's not his place to tell and two; he doesn't have the heart to do so.
And it's supposed to be confidential right?
He turned the knob and walked slowly with his head submerged in endless thoughts until he passed an intersection. He knows that he should be in a hurry but his confused mind is getting the best of him. The east road leads to the Hyuuga's and north leads to the main gate of Konoha. He looked back and forth contemplating on what to do. To be honest, he doesn't really know..
If he goes north, there's a possibility that Hinata might never forgive him again or worse, break their relationship for good..
If he goes east, then Sakura might be dead already by the time he gets to that forbidden forest. He's gonna lose his friend forever, just like how he lost Sasuke..
Oh hell what to do now..
He closed his eyes and took a step forward. He had made his decision and the consequences are inevitable. Sacrifice is needed.. he certainly doesn't want to choose between the both of them.. but..
He picked up his pace towards the north, trying not to think about anything else but his mission to find the missing Haruno Sakura.
Sasuke went out of the bathroom with his hair damp and wet for he had taken another bath. He doesn't quite know how many times he had taken a bath already but running water certainly helps the high temperature of his body decrease a bit. He closed the door and fixed his eyes towards the bed. He found Sakura asleep. He dried his hair with a towel and went to get a chair at the far end corner of the room. He then placed the chair just a few meters away beside Sakura's bed and sat down. He took a deep breath and started at the young girl in front of him. She's sleeping more calmly than her last sleep at least, he thought.
He looked outside the window and saw the storm still ravaging the forest.
'This will take long..'
He sighed and tried to sleep. How will they survive this with no food or water? He felt his dizziness coming back and he closed his eyes tightly.
That's when he heard his name being called.
"Sasuke..?" said the voice quietly.
He opened his eyes and saw Sakura already sitting on the bed. Half of her body is being illuminated by the little light the moon can give them while only half of his face is being lighted by it. They stared at each other. He had been so preoccupied by his dizziness that he hadn't even notice the kunoichi arising from the bed.
But that's when Sakura noticed something.
"Are.. are you alright?"
Her brows furrowed as she attempted to get out of bed and over to the Uchiha.
Something was wrong. From the little light outside the window, she can see his forehead sweating.
Sweating? On this weather? That can't be..
She moved closer so that she was already standing in front of him. Sasuke made no attempt to stop her form whatever she's doing and closed his eyes.
She saw his chest heaving heavily and heard his rapid breaths. She extended out her hand to touch his forehead.
The he suddenly gripped her wrist. Sakura jumped a little by his sudden actions.
He opened his eyes and looked up to her. To be honest, he's already seeing doubles.
No words were exchanged.
Sakura saw his unfocused eyes. Rapid breaths, sweating.. these are symptoms for what..
Sasuke closed his eyes tightly. He felt his head throbbing as nausea begins to surface. He kept his grip on Sakura's wrist unconsciously.
That's when Sakura felt the heat of his hand creeping through her cold arm. Fever.. a high fever already in critical level.. her eyes widened.. unfocused eyes, dizziness, heavy breathings.. everything! The symptoms fit!
'This could be fatal!'
Her being a medic kicked in. She felt as if all the energy she lost suddenly came back to her. She tried not to panic and made a thorough plan of what she's supposed to do at times like this. Her face became serious as she tried to analyze the problem, answering questions like how he had gotten the fever and what could've caused it to be at a dangerous level as this..
She could only think of one answer to her questions. And it's breaking her down with guilt.
'Me..'
She felt his grip slowly loosening and her eyes widened as he begun to tumble in front of her. Sasuke just lost his consciousness. She caught him by the armpit but as his whole weight begins to fall on her, Sakura's knees gave up and her legs buckled. Making the both of them fall painfully on the ground. The chair in which Sasuke was sitting on made a loud noise as it also toppled down to the floor. The sound almost broke Sakura's eardrums into pieces knowing that it hadn't heard as much as a whisper for a long time coming.
"Tch.. kuso.."
Seems like her body still cant afford too much. She just needs to be more careful next time then..
She painstakingly placed Sasuke's limp body on the bed and took a deep breath. She then removed his shirt, seeing that it is already thoroughly wet because of sweat. She ran over his bag pack and searched inside it. She searched frantically that she accidentally cut herself from a shuriken that was hidden behind a bundle of clothes. She ignored it and took out another shirt with the Uchiha symbol on the back. She then put it on Sasuke with much difficulty. She could hear Sasuke's rapid breaths and saw his cheeks becoming redder and redder.
She run over to the bathroom and turned on the yellow light. She grabbed on a towel and washed it. She placed the cold and wet towel on Sasuke's forehead. Sakura's actions were quick and rapid but she was not panicking, she knew better than to do so. She made sure that everything was right.
And then, she prepared herself from what she was about to do next.
Sasuke is terribly weak and out of energy to possibly survive his fever. She's ninety percent sure that if he's not gonna get the energy needed to fight this fever, he's gonna die. But if he's lucky, he can survive.
Luck.. who believes in hell luck!!
It's a risk she's not willing to take, she thought.
She concentrated chakra on her hands until a green light enveloped it and placed them on Sasuke's chest.
She's gonna give some of her energy to him. That way, the possibility of life over death will be much higher.
In oppose to her condition, unfortunately. She put more chakra to her hands. She could feel the heat emanating from it.
There you go again said the little voice inside her head.
She tried to ignore it.
You're not supposed to do this.. you're supposed to feel hatred.. agony.. angst.. towards this guy.. this guy who never gave importance to your feelings.. this guy who hurt you countless of times.. this same guy you vowed to forget, it continued.
She felt her eyes watering. She tried to deny it.. tried so hard but.. the little voice is right.. it's right..
Why can't she seem to do that?
For so many years, she had tried not to be vulnerable anymore. She tried so hard to teach herself not to give up to emotions so easily. She's a damn ninja! Didn't she promised herself that she's gonna put every rule, every saying, every law and regulations by heart?
Ninjas aren't supposed to feel anything. She recalled their mission with Haku during their genin days.. she thought Sasuke died at that time.. and she cried.. feeling helpless and 'always in the way' in missions.. blaming herself for being nothing but such a stupid burden.. she had cried so hard..
And now.. she's crying again because she failed herself once more..
Because she can't prove to herself that she had totally changed.. that she no longer needed anyone by her side..
Because until now.. until now..
Her tears doubled up at her self resignation.
She still loves him..
She choked a little as she looked at Sasuke's face. The face that wont set her free.. the face that will always be remembered no matter how much time, seasons and occasions try to bury it in the past..
Damn it! Damn it all!
She felt her tears coming down to her cheeks and she closed her eyes as her tear-stricken face is being illuminated by the green light her body is giving off. What's the point of denying it? When everything you do is hopeless.. when everything you work for breaks down in just one glance.. change is so hard for her to achieve because when one wants to change herself thoroughly, you have to really set your mind, body and soul to it.. your heart.. you have to have a deep desire to change in order to attain it..
So how can she do that when her heart desires for something much more than change that even contradicts it? Something unattainable and beyond the reach of possibilities.. When her heart, she knows deep down, asks for nothing but recognition to one man? When her heart yearns and longs for him no matter how much she put it aside?
She thought she lived for power and recognition for the village of Konoha.
She thought she can now do anything without any help.
She thought she's not the same Sakura anymore ever since her parents died.
But she just manipulated herself, sad truth..
How she thought wrong.. so wrong.. this tears as solid proof..
She's still that same and weak young girl that Uchiha Sasuke never acknowledged.. deep down inside, she knows she still is.. for her feelings for him never change, more so, it even became stronger than before..
And she'll accept it.. no matter how hard and wrong it is..
She felt her body weakening and the glow of her hands starts to dim. After a few seconds more, the light completely vanished and Sakura, feeling depressed and crestfallen, fell down on the floor in her knees with a loud thud. She cringed a little because of the pain but dismissed it as soon as it came. Now she's the one who's sweating.
She gave almost all of her energy to Sasuke that all the bed rest she just had suddenly became of no use. She was still crying and sobbing as she rests her head at the edge of the bed.
The cabin was cold, dark and eerie, and no sounds were heard but Sakura's hesitant cries.
"Naruto-kun.."
He walked past her. Hinata felt like crying.
"W-wait! Wh-where are you going..?" she said as she whipped around to see his retreating form.
Naruto continues to walk without glancing back. Hinata felt the tears forming inside her eyes. Why is he not acknowledging her?
"Naruto!" she shouted.
Naruto stopped, turned his head a little and looked at her. He could see her pale face and the newly formed tears.
"..Go back home.. Hinata.." he said impassively. He turned his back to her and tried to hide the hurt.
Hinata's eyes widened. Naruto never talks to her like that..
"You.. you haven't told me anything.. about.. about leaving.." Hinata said, looking down at the ground below.
Naruto faced her and looked down in guilt. This is gonna hurt her so much..
"Hinata.. I'm.. I'm sorry.."
Hinata looked at him straight in the face, her tears going down her cheeks continuously. She's not going to let him leave.. no matter how selfish it may sound and even if Sakura's life is in the line.. she's not going to be the 'second place priority' again.. she's so tired of it! It's about time that Naruto's shows her, even just this once, that her opinion also matters and that between Sakura and her, she's more important..
"I wont let you leave" Hinata said seriously.
Naruto looked at her, his eyes looking for understanding. Naruto was shocked by the cold and serious voice of Hinata, knowing that she rarely uses it.
"Hinata-chan.. please.." Naruto begged.
"It's too dangerous Naruto! Please.. the storm is still in critical level.. and.. and.. I mean I know you're worried about Sakura but other ANBU's can do it Naruto! Please don't risk your life for this.. I mean.." Hinata broke down with a sob. This is so wrong.. so wrong.. so selfish..
Naruto walked over to her, looking for something to say.. he doesn't blame her. She has every right to do this.. she has every right to feel this way.. and he knows, deep down, she doesn't mean Sakura any harm but is just really concerned about him more than anything else..
"Naruto please.. if you.. if something bad happens to you.. I just.. I just can't.."
Hinata sat down on the ground and continued sobbing, feeling crestfallen and embarrassed.. she's losing hope now..
Naruto kneeled down in front of her and embraced her. It hurts him to see her like this.. she has done nothing wrong to deserve this.. he is not worthy of her tears, these tears.. he is not creditable enough for the pure love that she gives him.. he can't help but feel that it's his entire fault that she's suffering like this.. it's his fault for not giving her enough attention, for making her feel like she's always the second one, for lacking everything that she wanted him to make her feel..
"Hinata-chan.. I want you to promise something to me.."
Hinata was sobbing on Naruto's chest, clinging on the hem of his shirt. She's not going to let him go, whatever the hell happens.. she'll continue clinging if it's the only thing that will make him stay.. she won't let him go, not this time.. she can't imagine life without him..
"Hinata-chan please.. listen to me.."
Hinata did not answer. She doesn't want anything in the world now but to convince him to stay.. she doesn't want any promises or vows! She just wants him to stay here, at her side..
Naruto did not wait for a response anymore. He's running out of time and Hinata's sobs is making him turn back on his mission.. it's breaking him down with guilt.. it's better to end this as soon as possible before he change his mind about finding Sakura.. he tightened his embrace on her..
"When I go Hinata-chan.. please promise me that you'll wait for me.. please promise me that.." his voice is cracking up as he felt tears form in his eyes.
"Hinata-chan please listen to me.." Naruto said as he raised Hinata's head so that they could look at each other's eyes directly.. but Hinata moved her head away from his hands, refusing.. Naruto felt his tears coming down..
"Please Hinata-chan.. don't make this harder for the both of us.." Naruto said.
After a few seconds, Hinata finally looked up, her eyes pleading for him to stay. She hated to see Naruto crying, mostly now that it's because of her..
"Please promise me Hinata-chan.. that you'll wait for me.. and that.. that you won't ever forget me.. please.."
More tears continued to form inside Hinata's white eyes. The wind is blowing rather gently around them, as if respecting the moment that both of them are having. Hinata's long hair danced with it unhappily..
"Please Hinata-chan.. please say you do.."
Hinata just nodded, not really caring any longer to the situation. She can't seem to argue anymore.. she feels so tired of all this..
Naruto closed his eyes and smiled while he rested his forehead unto hers before saying "And I promise that I will always love you Hinata-chan.. no matter what happens.. you'll be the last girl that I will ever commit myself to.."
"I promise that to you Hinata-chan.. and it's a promise for a lifetime and beyond life itself.." he said quietly.
Hinata sobbed some more. What else can she do to make him stay.. but if it's this that makes him happy, then she's gonna force herself to be willing..
"Naruto-kun.. please be careful.. please.. please come back.."
Naruto didn't say anything but he felt his heart break again. He can't promise that one..
"Hinata-chan.."
"Naruto-kun.. I never regretted anything with you.. and I won't regret this either.. I will stand by your side through and through.."
"Thank you Hinata-chan.."
A pause.
"I.. I love you.."
It was the last words that Hinata heard before she passed out. Naruto stood up and placed her at the bench unwillingly. He can't believe that he had just done what Sasuke had done to Sakura when he left and betrayed Konoha.. it broke him down with guilt. Funny how things turn out sometimes huh? He walked away from the village of Konoha with a heavy heart and strong determination to find the missing Haruno Sakura.