This is a fic I've been working on for a little while now but hadn't perfected yet. It's still not perfect but I don't think that's possible. Anyway, please enjoy and let me know what you think, good or bad. It's based off a book called The Raging Quiet by Sherryl Jordan. If you've never heard of it, look it up. It's really good.
Disclaimer: I do no own Inuyasha or The Raging Quiet
It would be a beautiful wedding, she was sure. Her grandfather had planned everything out that he could manage and there was little for her to worry about. But that didn't stop Kagome from trembling as her mother and friends placed garlands of flowers in her hair and fussed with her outfit. This was not how she had intended for her life to go, how she had planned to find her husband. In truth the young woman hadn't really considered marriage before the lord's son had come to ask for her hand but she knew that this was not how she'd wanted it to happen. The entire situation behind his proposal made it hard for her to believe it was all real but her mother fiddling with an unruly curl near her ear made it obvious to Kagome that nothing about this day was the dream she had hoped it to be.
She'd first met Koga months ago when he'd arrived at his father's grand house after years of wandering and doing business for his father far away. She'd heard about him from the other women who worked in the house, twittering about how handsome and charming he was. Kagome had never met the man herself and when she did she found him slightly arrogant but still as handsome as the women had told her. It had been a fluke really, an accident, that they'd met at all. She had been cleaning out an old weapons room, carefully washing the floors without complaint. She'd been on her hands and knees scrubbing the floor when a shadow fell over her. Whipping around and flying into a defensive stance she found herself face to face with a handsome young man. Glowing blue eyes and a jaunty smile lit his lips, adding to the charm that so many women saw in him. He was perhaps older than her by more than a few years and looked as though he had seen a great many things in his travels. The rumor around town was that all the men in his family had a mean streak in them but she saw none of that in him then. Kagome froze before dropping her hands and dipping into a bow. Koga chuckled softly before telling her to raise her head. "There is no need to bow to me," he told her with a small smile, "I am not your master here." There was something in his eyes that day that made an uneasy shiver run down Kagome's spine.
Their next meeting was more intentional on his part, several weeks later. He searched her out and found where she helped with the tending of the lord's garden during the mornings. Kagome had been surprised to see him come around the corner of the house, a sly grin on his lips as his high dark ponytail swung behind him. "Good morning sir," she'd said in shock, bowing faintly as he approached her. "What brings you to the garden this morning?"
He looked her over, making her slightly uncomfortable with quick caress of his eyes. She stood from where she was kneeling in the dirt, facing him with just enough defiance to make his lips twist in a smirk. "I was hoping, Higurashi-san, that you might grant me the honor of accompanying me to the festival this coming week." Speechless, Kagome stood completely still. Was he really asking her? A lord's son? She was no one special, certainly not anyone to look at twice. Why would he ask her instead of one of the prettier girls, one of her friends even? But he seemed determined to ask her and no one else and so Kagome found herself invited and attending the summer festival with the lord's middle son. Her mother, brother and grandfather had all been excited to know about the honor bestowed upon their family. Her grandfather was nearly in tears over the prospect that she may very well have caught Koga's eye for good.
"To think, my own lovely granddaughter could be married to a lord in no time at all!" he cried in excitement while adjusting his robes. Her mother dressed Kagome and then herself for the festival, helping her younger brother Sota put on his shoes.
"Jii-chan, I'm not ready to get married and certainly not to Ookami-sama's son! He's older than me and I've only met him once before." But the young woman's complaints went unheard in the bustling household. She was ushered out the door and made to wait patiently for the young lord to retrieve her from their front gate. When he did he did so in style, his clothes fine and clean pressed. He had a small bouquet of flowers from his father's garden in his hand and Kagome took them with a blush. The two walked in silence, Kagome subtly deterring the young man when he seemed to be getting a bit too close. Overall she had a good time that night but she couldn't say that Koga's company added anything to the festivities. He was boastful and arrogant, not that Kagome wasn't used to it, but she was more accustomed to the polite young men who came to pay their respects at the shrine her family lived on and found the lord's son slightly irritating. At the end of the night he returned her to her gate where she bowed to him in farewell. Kagome turned to go inside but noticed that Koga was still standing where she'd left him. "Was there something you needed sir?" she inquired with a raised eyebrow, twisting her long dark hair over her shoulder when it fluttered in the breeze. He bit his lip and nodded but said nothing. Curious, Kagome took a step forward but not close enough to be impolite. Needless to say she was startled when he took her hand. For a moment he looked as though he fully intended to kiss her but lifted her hand to his lips instead. She stood wide-eyed as he bowed, turned and left.
Several months passed, the town preparing for winter and the Higurashi family going about their usual business. The only interruption to their days were the occasional visits of the lord's son, and the more frequent arrival of gifts for Kagome from far off places. Her grandfather, brother and mother would fawn over the gifts, often more excited about them than she was herself. Kagome was no fool, she knew what Koga's intentions were, she just had no idea how to turn him away without insulting him and bringing bad things down on her family. The young woman continued to work in the lord's house every week to make extra money for her family and help her grandfather with the shrine the rest of the week. Times were getting harder and fewer families were sending their donations every month. As the alms decreased in number, the Higurashi family funds also dropped. Kagome saw the strain it was bringing upon her mother who knew of no other way to bring in money. Kagome took it upon herself to work more days each week in the lord's house and by default, ran into Koga more often.
He was always glad to see her and she found him a slight comfort in that he seemed to sympathize with her family. He never made her feel poor, or like she didn't belong at his side as they walked through the gardens on her lunch break. He made a good friend in times when she felt as though the life she'd known was slipping out from under her feet. When her grandfather announced that no one had required a blessing or exorcism in over a month Kagome felt a faint desperation fill her. How were they to survive? The answer came on a startling and chilly night, a knock on the door. Sota went to answer it and ushered in Koga. "Ookami-sama, to what do we owe this pleasure?" her Jii-chan asked in wonder. Mama bustled to make tea and the whole family knelt at the table in awed silence while the young lord sipped from his cup.
"It has come to my attention that you have been struggling the last few months." At their silence he continued. "My father will not make it through the winter and my brothers will take his place. I hoped to come offer my assistance to your family while I still had the power to do so."
"But Ookami-sama, I don't know that there is anything you can do," Kagome spoke, ashamed that he had taken it upon himself to aide her family because they had no money when his own father was sick. It was a hard reminder to know that they were poorer than even before and that he knew this was the fact. How could he really find time to come offer them help when he had so much to handle on his own? "We appreciate your offer, but I…"
"There is one thing." Chewing his lower lip in a pensive gesture, Koga sighed before turning his eyes on the head of the house. "Higurashi-san, I have come to take your granddaughter as my wife. Your family will be well taken care of if you agree and you will have one less mouth to feed." The entire Higurashi family gaped at the young man, Kagome white as a sheet in her shock. Turning her eyes to her grandfather, she silently begged him to tell the man no. She wasn't ready to marry, she was only seventeen! Granted, most girls her age had sweethearts or even husbands already, but that didn't mean that she was ready. She was willing to become a miko, like he had always wanted, anything for him to tell Koga to go away. "My father has given me a small piece of valuable land to make my own and I need a lovely young woman such as your granddaughter to make it a home." In a daze she watched her grandfather nod his head solemnly, his eyes glazing over as he gave away his only granddaughter. Kagome wanted to run, to hide, but her legs were frozen and she could do nothing as Koga smiled at her, taking her hands in his and kissing them both. His deep blue eyes glowed with happiness and he obviously thought her stunned silence was her little heart fluttering with giddy excitement.
Now they rode side by side on a wagon seat in the same uncomfortable silence that had pervaded their wedding. Kagome felt a tiny amount of bitterness toward her grandfather for selling her off to this man, for giving her away to save the family. But deep down she understood and she could have put up a fight had she chosen to do so. Her mother had cried for hours that night, holding Kagome as she too cried for the loss of her family. Almost directly after the wedding plans had been made for them to move to the landholding Koga had been left by his father. She didn't have the warm feelings that her mother had told her she would feel when she was married to a man she loved and it didn't surprise her. She didn't love this man, not really. He was pleasant to her and treated her with as much kindness as she could hope for but she felt nothing for him but respect. He had taken her as his wife, a poor shrine guardian's granddaughter, and provided for her family so that they could keep the shrine and eat.
"You are awfully quiet my dear," came a deep voice from her left. Kagome nodded softly but said nothing. "Are you feeling unwell?"
"No. I… I miss my family," she responded. A gently hand was placed on her knee for a moment and she looked up into sympathetic blue eyes. "I will be alright once we reach our new home," she whispered. She didn't believe it and she had a feeling that Koga didn't either. He asked nothing more of her and continued to guide the horses to the town where they would now live. Her new husband had told her very little about the place they would soon call home and Kagome was curious to find out what it was like. Were the people friendly? Was the house nice? Koga had said it was valuable but had said nothing more about the house itself other than it sat in a small cove.
Coming around a bend, the village came into view. It was a small place with quaint houses that looked like they had roughed the sea winds for many years. There were few people around and Kagome wondered why. Her question was answered as she heard people shouting and the unearthly loud slap of someone being whipped. She looked to the sound and found one of the most terrifying things she had ever seen. A boy was tied up, being flogged by a tall burly man with a crowd of townspeople surrounding them both. The people standing around were shouting things like "Get the demon out of him!" and "Make sure he learns his lesson this time!" Appalled and utterly sickened she rose to leap from the wagon and make them stop as the boy continued to endure his pain in a deafening silence.
"Sit down woman, you'll fall from the wagon," Koga snapped, yanking down on her arm roughly. Kagome glanced at him before returning her eyes to where the whipping seemed to have ceased. The boy's back was flayed wide open, the blood seeping from his wounds obvious even at their distance. Tears welled in her eyes as she saw how the villagers left him there, tied to the post with no way to untie himself. Again Kagome fought to jump from the wagon but was restrained by the man at her side. "Kagome, you'll do well to listen to me. The boy's obviously stolen something. Let the villagers dole out their punishment or you'll be next." Though everything in her railed against the idea, Kagome did as told and remained seated. She watched as the poor boy turned to look at them, the deep sorrow on his face stabbing her. 'I'm sorry,' she told him silently, 'I would have stopped them.' Even from there he seemed to understand her look and watched their wagon turn the corner down into the village.
Once in the square, Kagome took in the houses more closely, studying the people as they returned to them. The people were as weathered looking as their homes. It was obvious they would not likely be accepting of her and her new husband if they would do what they had done to the boy. Kagome found herself terrified when Koga told her to stay in the wagon while he went into the local teahouse to pick up some supplies. They only had their lunch from earlier, most of which they hadn't eaten, and the dried rice that would only last them the next few days.
"I'll be right back Love," he murmured, leaning over to place a kiss on her lips but catching her cheek instead when she turned her head at the last moment. He made a sound like he had growled low in his throat but said nothing more before disappearing into the building. Kagome sat stiffly on the seat of the wagon, her heart pounding. They had yet to kiss and the prospect of such a thing with this man she hardly knew scared her more than it should have. Lost in her thoughts, Kagome almost missed the sound of someone approaching her. Tensing in fear, she slowly turned her eyes and met a pair of deep violet irises. They were the most amazing shade she had ever seen and she was shocked to see how close they were.
The face surrounding those eyes was thin and sad yet held a note of strength and defiance. The blood from his back had soaked into what was left of his shirt and his wrists were bruised and bleeding where the ropes had cut into them. Kagome gasped slightly and the boy shrunk back from her. Biting her lip, the young woman slowly lowered herself to the ground beside him, watching him watch her. "Hello," she whispered. Her tone apparently intrigued him because he moved closer but not close enough that she could touch him. She reached into the wagon for the remains of their lunch, only managing to find a couple rice balls in her short search. She offered them to the boy who was watching her from beneath dark unruly bangs. "Here, I made them myself." It was evident he was curious about her but still wary. He was older than she'd first thought, maybe two or three years older than herself. After a moment he took the food from her hands but darted off between two houses. Startled by his rapid departure, she stood and watched the path he'd taken. A few minutes later she noticed footsteps behind her and turned to find Koga striding toward her with several bags slung over his shoulders. He looked ultimately triumphant though in Kagome's opinion, buying some meat, grain and tea was hardly anything to be proud of when you had a lot of money.
"There we are. Come on then," he said, hefting the foodstuffs into the wagon and holding out a hand to help her up into the wagon. The young woman was stubborn and only allowed his help after a few moments of wary staring. She didn't trust him yet and it bothered him more than he thought it would. 'It matters not. She'll be mine in every sense soon enough and all that mistrust will be gone from her eyes.' Taking up the reins Koga led the horses the rest of the way through town and back into the hills on the other side. Kagome took in the beauty that surrounded them, noticing a small Buddhist temple sitting a small ways from the road. Standing in front of the gate with a broom was a monk in long black and purple robes. He offered them a wave in greeting on their way past and Koga saw his little wife smile and wave in response. She was a bit more spirited than he'd realized and while it irritated him to have to control that spirit, he found himself fired up by the prospect of a fiery wife. "Our new home is just ahead."
It wasn't at all what she'd been expecting. There was nothing special about the place aside from the land it sat on. The small house, no bigger than any in town, sat a ways from a small area of beach. The beach was protected by two outcroppings of land and there were trees shading the house from getting too much sun or wind. The house was pretty but even smaller than the one she and her family lived in back at the shrine. "It's a little smaller than I pictured," she admitted when Koga asked her what she thought of it. He huffed but said nothing and began moving their things into the house. Kagome went inside and instantly noticed how filthy it was. "Don't bring any of that in here until I've had a chance to clean!" she cried, stalling Koga from bringing in their chests of clothes. He sighed but put his hand up in defeat and sat on one of the chests. Kagome bustled about, wiping down cobwebs and using the broom her younger brother had made for her to sweep the dust out the door. The hearth was next, sitting in the middle of the floor, and it took a good deal more cleaning than she'd hoped. Once she was done the place looked a little better and she was covered in dirt. "Alright, you can bring it in now," she said with a sigh. Koga's blue eyes sparkled with mirth as he looked down at her but he nodded without saying a word. Kagome took advantage of the small spring she found running to the sea just off in the woods to clean her face and hands.
When she returned Koga had everything in, the futon rolled in the corner farthest from the door, a small table across from that and their clothing chests along the back wall. He had started a small fire in the fire pit and had a pan on so she could make dinner when she returned. She did so without complaint since Koga gave her a pleading look worthy of a small child. The two ate their meal in silence as seemed to have become custom. Kagome felt Koga's eyes on her but couldn't find the courage to look him in the face. His thoughts were as easy to read as if he had laid them out in front of her. 'What makes him so eager to lay with me? We have years ahead of us for that and we've hardly known one another five months.' But no matter what her thoughts or fears on the matter Koga's intentions were planned for that very night and he seemed to have no problem making sure Kagome knew exactly what he was thinking. Needless to say it took the romance out of it.
Once Kagome had finished cleaning their dishes and laying them to dry on a cloth near the window, she found she had nothing left to keep her from the futon. Koga was already in nothing but his sleeping yukata and had unrolled the futon to lie down. His hair was down around his face in an admittedly enticing manner but Kagome found herself shaking in fear. Her whole body, her whole entire being felt wrong. Something about this situation had her heart beating faster in a way that made her want to throw up. "Are you going to stand there all night?" Koga's voice startled her from her fearful ponderings. How was she supposed to put him off? She flashed him a nervous smile, asking him to turn away while she changed. He chuckled softly but did as requested. After that Kagome found him stretched out on his back under the covers and her eyes widened at the look in his eyes. There was something predatory lurking in the depths of his gaze and it sent chills through her body. Turning away she went about saying her prayers for the night, hoping to stall until Koga finally gave up and went to sleep.
Kagome didn't anticipate the way the room felt like it was alive as she silently went through her blessings over her family and the home she now occupied. A growl rumbled behind her and she whipped around. Koga's eyes were closed and he looked as though he were in pain. What on earth was going on? "Koga-sama?"
"It's nothing. Come to bed woman," he hissed. Kagome's eyes remained wide in fear but she finally gave up and did as told. She tried to stay as far to the side as possible but no matter what she did she could feel the warmth of Koga's long form stretched out beside her. Squeaking in fear when he rolled near her caused him to make that noise she thought of as growling once more. "Are you afraid of me Kagome?" he murmured in her ear just before he lay his hand on her bare thigh. Neither one anticipated the shock that would run through his fingertips, driving him back. "Bitch!" he shouted, shooting up off the bed. Kagome stared at him then looked down at herself as if that might tell her what had happened. She'd felt no pain, why had he?
"What was that?" she whispered in horror. Koga's eyes held a faint light she didn't like the look of and his stance was angry as he stood breathing heavily over her. He seemed to have a very good idea of what had happened and seemed to blame her for the painful shock he'd gotten. He continued to huff and growl before crawling back into bed and rolling onto his side away from her. Kagome waited until he was asleep before she finally allowed herself to relax. 'That has to be wrong. That isn't supposed to happen!' But something about Koga touching her had always put her off… just never that strongly. Maybe there was something wrong with her. She'd go to the temple in the morning and ask for help.
So that's the first chapter. Let me know if I should bother posting any more chapters. Thanks for reading!