Disclaimer: Power Rangers and all related logos are property of Saban and/or Disney Entertainment. I am using them without permission, but I do not intend to make a profit. If I do happen to make a profit, I promise to donate mine share to their kids that you can sponsor for seventy-five cents a day. I will, I mean it.
A/N: This takes place some time before Turbo, but after the movie. Also, check out the video for it, the link can be found on the main page.
What hurts the most
It was strange being back home. It had been close to two years since she'd be gone, and somehow, she expected things to be different. The Youth Center was the same, Ernie's Juice Bar was still the same, and his strawberry smoothies were still the best she'd ever had. She sat at the bar sipping her smoothie, reminiscing on how much time she spent there with her friends. The Youth Center was her home away from home; if they weren't out fighting one of Rita's monsters or at school, they were at the Youth Center.
'I wonder how no one ever figured out we were the power rangers,' she chuckled to herself. After all, the six of them always hung out together, always wore their respective colors, and as soon as there was an attack of some kind, the six of them disappeared at the exact moment the power rangers showed up. Thinking back on it, it should have been obvious, but the good people of Angel Grove never seemed to put two and two together.
Being a ranger was a part of her life she'd never forget, and walking away from that was the hardest thing… 'No wait, one of the hardest,' she thought to herself. While going to the pan globals was a difficult decision for her to make, writing Tommy that letter had to be the hardest thing she'd ever done. Being in the Olympics, training to go for the gold left her with very little time, so trying to pursue a long distance relationship with him would have been close to impossible. Writing that letter was hard, but even now, she knew it was for the best. She was sure that Tommy would have gotten over her, moved on with his life, maybe even found someone else.
When she arrived in town, she was shocked to hear from Tommy so quickly. She figured he was still busy being a ranger. They never discussed it in their letters; keeping his secret identity would have difficult if someone had come across those letters, so all the letters they were wrote were rather vague. They never discussed his private life, though he did mention finding his long lost brother. It pleased her that he'd found someone from his family, someone he could connect to. Still, in all their letters, there was never a mention of anyone he may have been dating.
That left her with hope.
"Another one Kim?" Ernie asked, breaking her train of thought.
"Huh?" she looked up, realizing her smoothie was just about gone. "Oh, yeah sure. Thanks Ernie."
"Its really good to see you again Kim," he handed her another smoothie. "The place just hasn't been the same without you," he told her.
She reached over, grabbing his hand slightly. "Thanks Ernie."
"Are you meeting your friends here?"
"Yeah, Tommy and I are meeting here. I have something to talk to him about," she said.
Even without saying it, Ernie knew what she was talking about. He'd been in the Juice Bar long enough to know there was something special between the two of them. He simply smiled slightly.
"Well, good luck," he said, walking away.
"Yeah, I'm going to need luck," Tommy sighed as he stood in front of the mirror, trying to pick out something to wear.
Normally, finding something to put on wasn't that difficult. He'd throw on a pair of jeans, maybe a red shirt, and he was finished. Ironically enough, there was still plenty of green and white in his closet as well.
"Have you ever considered something in basic black?" Adam asked him as he leaned up against the wall, folding his arms.
"Black was never my color."
"I don't know why you're so nervous, this is Kim we're talking about," he reminded him.
"I know, but a lot has happened since the last time I we had a chance to talk. Aw man, I don't know what to do," he sighed.
"Well, do you still have feelings for her?"
"Of course I have feelings for him. I wouldn't have come all the way back if I didn't," Kim groaned, finishing off the last of her smoothie.
"Oh, silly of me to think you'd come back just to visit old friends," Trini sighed, putting her elbows on the counter.
Even after all this time, Trini had the same innocent smile, the same personable look in her eyes. Of all her friends, Trini was probably the easiest to talk to. When she was coming back into town, Trini was the first person she called. The two of them had remained rather close since she went off to the pan globals, writing to one another. Trini told her all about the time she had during the peace conference, and Kim explained to her what her training schedule was like for the Olympics. Trini had only been in town a few weeks herself, and though it had been a few years since they'd seen one another, the two of them were able to pick up right where they left off like it was old times.
If only she had the same luck with Tommy.
"Oh Trini, you know what I mean. Its just that Tommy and I have a history together," she sighed. "We go back years."
"I know you do."
"Have you kept in touch with Tommy or any of the others?" Kim asked.
"Not really. The peace conference kept us pretty busy, but I know Jason and Tommy wrote to each other once in a while. When you wrote him that letter, he was devastated," she said.
"Devastated isn't even the word for it, I was crushed," Tommy sighed.
Adam remembered reading the letter to Tommy when he first got it. It was too personal for him to finish, so he gave it to Tommy to read privately. He recalled how hurt Tommy was, how long it took him to finally get over it.
"Yeah, but you moved on, and so did she. You two are just friends, catching up on old times, right?" he asked.
"You're right, but…"
"But what? I understand what you two had was something special, but that was high school. That was a long time ago, you're both very different people now. I'm sure shes with someone else, or at the very least over what you two had," he said.
"You're probably right."
"I know I'm right. If you still have feelings for him, you should at least tell him how you feel. It was a long ago, but the feelings were real. You two were a great couple," Trini told her.
"We were a couple of shy kids who didn't know what we were feeling. I carried such a torch for him, but the furthest it ever got was a few kisses here and there. I have no idea if he was ever really serious about me. Its not like we ever talked about our feelings," she brought up.
"Of course he was serious. He was from the moment you two met. I envied what you two had."
"Really?"
"Yeah really. Richie never worked up the nerve to say anything to me, Billy was way into his gadgets to ever pay any real attention to me. It wasn't until we went off to that peace conference that Zack and I started dating. I never would have…"
"Wait a sec, you and Zack?" Kim asked.
"Yeah, for about a year now. Its funny; while we were here I never even noticed him, but when we went half way around the world, I think I saw him for the first time," she said.
"That's so sweet. I always thought you two would be cute together," she said.
"Really?"
"Yes really. I think you should just go, talk to her, catch up on old times. I'm sure the two of you have a lot to talk about. After all, she did try to throw you into a pit of lava and turn you evil," Adam brought up.
"Oh come on, she was under a spell. Besides, she snapped out of it."
"Seems to me like all your girlfriends are evil at some point," he mentioned.
Tommy shrugged his shoulders. "What can I say? I have the best luck when it comes to women," he turned around, facing Adam. "Well, how do I look?"
"You look fine. Just go, talk to her, see what happens."
"You're right."
"Aren't I always?" he paused. "So, do you want me to go with you?"
"No, I can handle it. I'll call you later, tell you how it goes."
"Alright man, good luck," Adam said.
"I'm just going to tell him. When he gets here, I'm going to tell him," Kim insisted.
"Good for you. It'll be good for the two of you to finally be together again. I hope it all works out for you," she said.
"Oh, I hope so too. I've missed him so much. I thought about him everyday," she said.
"But what about the other guy?"
"What other guy?"
"Jason said Tommy told him you'd met someone else, that you were happy," Trini brought up.
"There was never anyone else. I told Tommy that so he would be able to move on. I thought it would be easier for him if he hated me," she said.
"What? How?"
"If I'd broken up with him, he would have come running to Switzerland to find me, to try to win me back. It would have distracted him from being a ranger, and I didn't want that to happen to him. He needed to stay focused, and so did I," she said.
"But Kim, I think he deserved to know the truth," Trini said.
"I know, it was stupid. I was young, I didn't know any better. But when he gets here I'm going to tell him everything. I have to," she said.
Trini glanced up as Tommy walked into the Juice Bar. She smiled slightly, reaching over and grabbing Kim's hand. "Good luck," she said.
She stood up, walking towards the door. She hugged Tommy slightly; kissing him warmly on the cheek, then politely excused her.
Tommy walked over to the bar slowly, unsure of what to expect. It would be the first time they'd been alone in years, and there were things he had to say to her, things he was sure she wanted to say to him. His heart was pounding, and his palms were sweating, but he was determined to get through it.
"Hey there beautiful," he said.
Kim turned around slowly, staring up at him. The moment she looked into his eyes, it all came rushing back to her. All the times they spent in the park, all the stolen moments they shared, all the things she wanted to say to him but couldn't.
"Is it really you?" she sighed.
"In the flesh," she said, playing along with her.
She stood up, wrapping her arms around him. She took a few extra seconds to simply hold him. She'd forgotten what it was like to be in his arms. It was the only times she felt safe, secure. It warmed her heart to be there with him again, it was almost as if she'd never left.
"Aw man, you look great," he said, taking a step back and getting a look at her.
She spun around slightly. "Thanks, you too. I see your hair is longer," she said.
"Yeah, a little."
"I'm glad you called, I've been meaning to talk to you," she said.
"Good, I wanted to talk to you too," he paused. "How were the pan globals?" Tommy asked.
"Two gold and a silver," she bragged.
"Congratulations."
"Thanks."
There was an awkward pause, a moment of indecision between them.
"I have something to tell you!" they said in unison.
"You first," Kim said.
"No, you first."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, really."
She took a deep breath. "Tommy, I…" she paused. "I wanted to let you know…" she tried to swallow the lump in her throat. "I thought you should know… there was never anyone else," she said.
"What? Huh?"
"In the letter, the one where I… I thought you'd want to know. There was never anyone else. I just thought that it was best to we moved on, you know? I was training, you were doing other things. It seemed like the right thing to do," Kim told him.
"But why didn't you just tell me?"
"I needed you to focus on what you were doing, not worry about me all the time," she said.
"But I wouldn't have…"
"Yes you would have Tommy, its in your nature. You were always there for me, to protect me, to keep me safe. I knew you'd come after me, and you couldn't do that. As much as I needed you, the city needed you more. The world needed you," she explained.
"But Kim, I…"
"I'm sorry I hurt you Tommy, I am. But the pan globals are over, and I'm here. I'm back," she said.
He paused. "What do you mean back?"
"Zordon told me that when I came back I'd be an even more effective power ranger. Well, I'm back. I'm ready to come back, to be a ranger again, to be with you," she told him.
"With me?" he sighed.
"I love you Tommy, I've always loved you. I never stopped loving you. I'm home now, and I'm ready to be with you. We can finally be together again Tommy," she said, wrapping her arms around him again.
Tommy paused slightly as a tear formed in his eye. For as long as he could remember, he'd waited for Kim to come back, to tell him exactly what she just said, to confess that she was still in love with him. He imagined what it would be like. He'd step down as a ranger, maybe go to college and get a degree of some kind, maybe go into teaching. It was more than he could have ever hoped for, but there was some major problem.
"Kim, I…"
She backed away. "I know I hurt you, and I know it'll take a while for us to go back to the way things were, but I'm sure that we will. I'm back, and I promise I'll never leave you again," she assured him.
"But Kim…" he paused. "There's something you should know."
"Whatever it is Tommy, it doesn't matter. I'm willing to try to work it out with you," Kim said.
"But Kimberly, I need to tell you…" he was interrupted as Katherine walked into the room, making her way towards them.
"Kim, its so good to see you again," she said, wrapping her arms around her.
"Sorry about that incident on the island, I…"
"I understand, you weren't yourself," Kim said.
"So how long are you back for?"
"I'm here to stay now," she told her.
"Good," she turned to Tommy, kissing him gently on the lips. "Sorry I'm late, my shift at the hospital ran a little long," Kat said.
"Its okay."
At that moment, it was as if time stopped for Kim. She could feel her heart drop into her stomach and her eyes began to water. It never once occurred to her that Tommy and Katherine were… together.
"So…" she tried to regain some composure. "Have long have you two been…"
"A little over a year now, around the same time you…" she paused, stopping herself before she said anything else. "It's been a while," she sighed.
"Oh, I see," Kim sighed, looking down awkwardly.
Kat looked at Tommy, over at Kim, then back at Tommy. "I'll head home. Call me later, okay?"
"I will."
She turned to Kim. "It really was great to see you again Kim," she said.
Kat wanted to lean in and kiss Tommy goodbye, but the moment was awkward enough. She simply touched his face gently, then made her way out the room.
"So… you and Kat," Kim sighed.
Tommy put his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, for a while now."
"I… I didn't know. I mean, you never mentioned it."
"I know, I wanted to, but I didn't think you'd be interested. I mean, you had your new boyfriend. You never really mentioned him either," he brought up.
She paused. "So, you two are serious about each other?" she asked.
He nodded. "Kim, I love her," Tommy told her.
"But what about me? What about us?"
"I'm sorry Kim, but you broke up with me. You moved on with you life, and so did I," he said.
A single tear rolled down her face. "But I still love you," she confessed.
"I love you too. I'll always love you, but that was a long time ago. We were kids in high school, we're older now. We're adults," Tommy said.
She nodded slightly. "I just thought that…"
He put his hand on her shoulder. "You don't know how long I waited for you to tell me you still loved me, but we're different now. I'm different now. Kat and I are happy together. We've been talking about getting an apartment together soon," he said.
"Well," she paused. "I hope the two of you are happy together. You deserve it," Kim said with tears in her eyes.
She turned to walk away, but Tommy reached out, grabbing her hand.
"Kim, I never meant to hurt you."
"I know you didn't. It's my fault really. All those letters you wrote, all the times you asked me to take you back. If I had listened to my heart, maybe things would have been different for us. Coming here was a bad idea, I'm sorry," she sighed.
Tommy watched as Kim walked away. He wanted to follow after her, to try to comfort her. But to say what? Was there anything he really could say to make her feel better? After confessing her feelings to him, after revealing years of feelings she'd kept to herself, he rejected her. He turned her away. Kimberly Hart. THE Kimberly Hart. She was his first love, his first real relationship, and he sent her away.
As much as it hurt to watch her go, he knew it was the right thing to do.
"Goodbye Kim," Tommy sighed.