I am such a freaking liar. How dare I keep writing! How, dare, I! Well I felt like writing and I thought I would wait to have this story all written up, but I decided to let you all read the first part. Now I would like to say that this story was started after Driving Miss Gilmore, and I had not watched the Season Finale yet. So just go with that, and pretend that Partings never happened, but when I'm done with you, you'll be begging for it to have happened! Not really, but I wish I could have you doing that. On with the story!
Disclaimer: I may have lied about retiring, but I am not lying when I say that don't own Gilmore Girls. I also can't afford to buy a Mother's Day card for my wonderful mother, so that's my proof that I don't own Gilmore Girls. Plus, if I did, I would have known what was going to happen in Partings, and I would have changed it so that Lorelai went home at the end of the night, and not to Christopher's.
Chapter 1: Tired and Crying
Lorelai was tired. She was tired of work. She was tired of being up trying to think of ways to avoid Luke the next day. She was tired of not being able to tell him that she wanted to be in April's life. She was just tired of pretending to live the perfect life she had always dreamed of.
"So, will I see you tonight?" Luke asked over the phone. It had been a week since she had lied to him and told him that there was a staff meeting. She was running out of excuses to give him to make him stay away from her.
"Uh…maybe, I'm busy so I might be staying late." she said, avoiding the real truth to why she wouldn't be seeing him.
"Well I don't have to get up early tomorrow, so I could spend the night at you place." he suggested. My place? She thought. Since when has it been my place? He paid for the remodeling, which is supposed to be for both of us. Shouldn't it be our house and not just mine? She asked herself.
"Sure, I guess. You know, looking at the staff now, I think I'll be able to leave on time." she said, covering up her lying. Luke didn't notice a thing.
"Ok, so I'll see you around four or five?" he asked.
"Uh…sure. See you then." she said.
"Ok, bye."
"Bye Luke." she said, just wanting to get the conversation over with.
They both hung up and Lorelai let out a huge sigh that she had unintentionally holding in. she then walked into the kitchen to purge herself of self-loath with a nice warm cup of coffee with just a tad bit of cream.
She wanted to be there for him and April. She normally wouldn't care what Anna thought, but she had hit close to home with the single mom speech and Lorelai knew what that was about, she knew what it was like to have to tiptoe around the people you daughter has in her life just so she doesn't get hurt. Lorelai knew how it worked, how the world revolves around the child, and never around what anyone else wants, so she knew that she would never be truly part of April's life until she married Luke.
That was another point. She was only engaged to Luke, she wasn't married, and there was a difference. Maybe Anna was right. Maybe she wasn't meant to be with Luke. Maybe Luke was just meant to be a father and not a husband. Why did he have to choose? Why, because that's the way the world works, you make choices and sacrifices. But if Luke had to choose between April and Lorelai, Lorelai knew she would be the one being thrown in the discard pile. Luke would pick his daughter over her, which Lorelai found completely wrong. Why should he have to choose? It was Anna's fault from the start that she was a single mother, so why should Luke have to suffer by giving up the one thing he had been working towards for the past ten years? Why couldn't he have his cake and eat it too?
"Lorelai, I brought home food." Luke said as he walked through the front door with a few bags in his hand. He didn't hear a response so he walked into the kitchen. He found Lorelai eating Chinese food at the table. She was wearing her glasses, her pajama bottoms with every imaginable dog breed on them (which she insisted on getting when they got Paul Anka so that he might get acquainted with the appearance of other dogs), and was doing some paper work while trying to fidget with a calculator.
"Ah! Stupid piece of shit!" she yelled as she threw the calculator against the wall. It broke into little pieces as Lorelai started to cry. She obviously didn't notice Luke had just come in.
"Lorelai?" Luke question as he stood in the kitchen door way.
"Oh, hey Luke." she said, drying her eyes quickly and turning around to face him.
"You ok?" he asked.
"Yeah, just a little technical difficulty with the calculator. Our accountant was feeling lazy so I have to add up all these big numbers and do something with the thing and some more numbers, and again with the thing, for last month, and then this month, and then the drains have squirrels in them"
"The drains have squirrels in them?"
"well no, but Sookie was using that phrase earlier to describe something and this seemed like the perfect situation to say that there are squirrels in the drains, and well then I have to figure out how to fire sandy, and then Ray, and the gardener has allegedly been having sex in the closet during work hours with Maria, who I have to fire now, and my day is just…eh!" she said, expressing all of her frustration.
"I'm sorry, do you need anything? I see you've already eaten." he stated, gesturing towards the 4 out of 5 empty Chinese food cartons.
"Oh, yeah, I was hungry and I need to eat in order to think, so I just ordered some food to tide me over until later." she answered.
"Ok, well are you sure you're ok?" he asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine, so tell me about your day." she said, quickly changing the subject.
"Well Anna called, and she's getting over the birthday party thing, and she wants me to watch April for the weekend. I'm thinking I'll take her camping and fishing, and just some other stuff."
"Oh, that sounds fun." Lorelai said, looking down. Was he trying to make up for those 12 or 13 years that he missed? Of course he was.
"Can I tag along?" Lorelai asked unexpectedly.
"Well, I just wanted it to be an April and me thing, and plus the whole Anna thing." he said as he sat down and pulled out the salad he had packed for himself.
"Ok" she answered as she looked back down at her papers.
She thought for a moment. And then looked at Luke.
"Luke?"
"Yeah?" he said, not looking up from his food.
"Do you want to try for a baby?" she asked. She had been thinking about this for the longest time, but she hadn't gotten up the nerve to voice the thought until now.
Luke spit up his food, and then questioned her with "what?"
"Well I was thinking about it and I'm not getting any younger, and a baby would be nice."
"Lorelai, we're not even married yet. And I still haven't gotten used to the whole April situation."
"Luke, you should know that it does take a wedding ring and some ceremony to create a child." she said in a tone of annoyance. How dare he make her wait! How dare he make me think that I am in the wrong yet again!
"Well maybe we can just wait a bit until we are, and then we can provide a stable home for a child. I mean, this is crazy. Where are you getting this from? You know that we aren't ready for a child." he said, in tone that only expressed his feeling that this idea was ridiculous and just plain insane.
"But when Luke? When will we be ready? You say you aren't comfortable with the whole April situation, but when will you be comfortable with it? And how are we not stable enough for a child? We make enough money, we're both financially stable, why can't we have a baby Luke?" she was starting to get emotional over this. She was getting frustrated over this. She was getting annoyed over this. And she was getting upset over this.
"Lorelai, come on, you know as well as I do that it will take some time with April. I've told you that, and that's why you decided to postpone the wedding. And how are we stable for a child? Why can't we wait a while for a baby? You know I want kids with you, but what's wrong with waiting?" he asked. Lorelai stood up and threw her pen on the table. She glared at Luke shortly and then stormed out of the room.
"Lorelai!" Luke yelled after her as she went into the living room. "Lorelai!" he repeated. Lorelai stopped in front of the couch and turned around.
"I'm tired of waiting!" she yelled as three tears cascaded down her cheeks. Luke was stunned. Did she want a baby this bad? No, she couldn't. There must be a reason behind all of this, why was she acting like this?
"Lorelai, what is really going on?" he asked, calmly and compassionately.
"You! I'm tired of waiting for you, Luke! That's what's going on! Now if you don't mind, I have to go grab some things from the store." she said as she walked to the door and went to grab her purse.
"Lorelai, please, talk to me. Tell me why you are acting this way." he asked.
"Luke, you were always able to tell how I was feeling, if I was having bad day, you could always tell from the look on my face, and you were always willing to just go with it, and let me have that 18th cup of coffee without argument, but what now? You don't even notice when I go from ecstatic to disappointment. You loved me before, does that mean that you don't love me anymore?" she asked. She was a foot away from him. She was looking straight into his blue eyes, which were only making it harder for her to keep the tears in.
Luke saw the pain. He saw it all in that one little speech. He grabbed her hard on the arm and pulled her in. her lips crashed into his hard and she was slightly surprised, but once that wore off, she pulled back.
"Luke, I just…I need some time…to think about all of this. I just really need to get that stuff at the store." she said suddenly as she rushed out of the house and out to her jeep. She got in and drove in the direction of New Haven.
Why did she do it? Why did she ask him? She just left him standing there. He was just standing there, slowly trying to let it all sink in. why had all of this happened to them.
Luke had fed Paul Anka, neatened up the kitchen, and slept on the couch because he found it impossible to sleep in the bed after what had happened--it just didn't seem right. He had of course taken her pillow, just so he wouldn't forget her smell.
Lorelai however had driven to Rory's apartment. She had gone up the apartment door, rung the bell, been welcomed in by both Rory and Logan, and then received the couch to sleep on.
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So what do you guys think? Any good? I'm going to try and get some more written (meaning a lot) before I post the next chapter. If you don't like it, or think that I could improve, please just say it and I'll change the story or mistakes, or maybe even dress like a clown and join a circus, your choice. Just let the pretty little Blue button into your heart, and you'll be my hero. Please review, it'll make my writing actually seem worth it.