A/N: First attempt at a Neko!Ed fic. Also, this is RoyxEd yaoi, meaning two men in a sexual relationship, if you don't like you should consider looking for a different story to read. Please do not flame me about how Ed/Roy is not, nor will they ever be gay, because they are and if you don't see you really need to watch the FMA movie and consider just why Roy acts the way he does! Oh and this is a slightly AU fic, seeing as Ed does not have cat ears and a tail in cannon that should be fairly obvious.
Special Thanks: this goes out to Midnight, my kitty-cat, for being the inspiration behind this pointless drabble.
Disclaimer: I keep telling people that FMA is really mine, that I just lent the idea to Hiromu Arakawa, but then the nice doctors gave my a little blue pill and threw me into a padded room.
Scare-dy Cat
He idly turned the page of the magazine that he really was not reading. His stomach was pressed flush to the bed and the long, blonde hair was fanned out across his back. Tawny ears twitched whenever the old house creaked. The matching tail flicked back and forth, the only part of him that displayed his impatience. He was waiting for his black haired lover to get home so that he could yell at the older man. Roy had left that morning without waking the small ball of feline and teenage energy and it angered him to no end. Ed had woken up in the mood for a quickie before Roy went to work, but when he had turned to reach for the sultry alchemist, his hand met nothing except cool sheets. His mood had remained sour through out the day.
When he heard the door slam downstairs, a loud testament to Roy's return home, Ed's tail flicked back and forth several times and his ears flattened to his head for a second before he resumed his calm façade. It took almost all of his concentration to slow the agitated twitch of his tail down to a leisurely speed, no fun in letting Roy know about his mood the moment he walked in the door. His irrational anger at the older man escalated in fury when Roy walked into the bedroom, glanced at the blonde, and then went straight to the bathroom without even saying hello to his young lover. Ed hissed under his breath before jumping off the bed and stalking his way towards the bathroom. Roy was dousing his head in water and still completely ignoring the house's other occupant. When he finished at the sink, he brushed past the teen, again without even saying a word of greeting, and headed downstairs.
Ed just stood where he was, his anger ebbing and being replaced with an emotion that he could not quite place, but it felt suspiciously like fear and despair. When the sound of cupboards banging reached his ears, Ed realized that Roy had had a bad day at work, but that still did not explain or excuse his actions towards his lover. So, with his tail flicking madly behind him and his ears pressed against his head, Ed gathered up all of the anger he had felt earlier and marched downstairs to give the older man a piece of his mind. He turned the corner into the living room and saw the black haired man sitting in his favorite chair. He planted himself in front of the man and crossed his arms. Golden eyes glared at the man that was still ignoring him. He opened his mouth to start yelling when he was interrupted. "I see you still have not vacuumed. You promised me a week ago that you would."
Then the man pushed himself off of the chair, walked past Ed without another word, and got the vacuum out of the closet. Ed watched as his lover plugged the cursed object in and flicked it on. He stood there in bafflement at the man's actions; surely he was not ignoring Ed because of some simple housework! Then the cleaning device started to approach his direction. His eyes went big, ears drooped to the side, and his tail dropped down displaying the teen's irrational fear. It was a fear that he had never shared with anyone, not even the man that he loved. He watched the hideous machine approaching and quickly slinked off in another direction. He hid in the kitchen for a time, but then Roy and his noisy companion came in there as well. Again, Ed ran off.
…..
Roy continued vacuuming after the teen had fled. His residual anger from work had disappeared when he first saw Ed's reaction to the vacuum, now he just continued with the chore while contemplating why some one would act the way Ed just had. It took him a while to convince himself that his initial suspicions were true, the idea was just so ludicrous. To think, Ed was afraid of the vacuum. It made sense after he started to think about it, Ed did not seem to have a problem with cleaning in general. Sure he would put up a fight and delay as much as possible, but the teen would eventually clean things. The only chore that Roy had never seen Ed perform was the vacuuming; usually he just left it to Roy, using some of his undeniable charms to persuade the older man when necessary.
Finishing with the first floor, Roy switched off the device. A mischievous plan had come to him a few minutes ago, it was one that would test his new theory and also end with Ed in a compromising position if all went well. With an evil glint in his eyes, Roy grabbed the hand held Dirt Devil that he kept for small messes. He forced himself to walk up the stairs calmly, knowing that Ed's sensitive ears would be able to hear the deviousness of his lover if he went up the stairs too fast. Hiding the small vacuum behind his back as he entered the room, he approached the teen that was once again lying on the bed and flipping through his magazine. Roy approached as quietly as he could, even though he knew it was useless, Ed already knew he was there. He could tell by the agitated twitch of the tawny tail.
Bringing the vacuum out from behind his back, Roy stepped next to the bed and turned the device on. Ed jumped almost a foot in the air and landed on his back. His eyes were big with fear as he scrambled across the bed, attempting to get as far away as possible. His body shook uncontrollably and he started to make a pathetic mewing sound. Roy shut off the vacuum, completely confused. Ed was not just scarred of the thing, he was absolutely terrified. Guilt rushed through the black haired man, he had never meant to cause his boyfriend this much distress.
As soon as the hideous, noisy device was shut off Ed buried his face in a pillow and attempted to calm himself down. He hated his fear, hated the stupid reason behind his fear. Most of all he hated the fact that Roy was about to ask about it, it was embarrassing. So when the inevitable question of 'why' came, along with a comforting hand on his back, Ed gave a flippant response. "The noise of it hurts my ears." It was not a complete lie, the sound did cause distress to his delicate lobes, it just was not the complete answer. The hand started to make gentle circles, silently letting Ed know that Roy knew he was holding out. Butterfly kisses along his neck persuaded Ed to give the real reason. In a small voice he admitted his deepest secret, "My mom accidentally vacuumed up my tail once, it hurt like hell for a few moments, but mostly the hair was just puffed out in an ugly way. Nothing could get it to look normal again until I shed the offending hairs and grew new ones. All the kids made fun of me and I've never been able to be near a vacuum again."
"I'm sorry." Roy responded, not sure what else to say. He understood the scars of youth to well and knew better than to scoff at Ed's confession. He promised himself then and there to never ask Ed to do the vacuuming again and even went so far as deciding that he would only vacuum when the blonde was out of the house.
"You didn't know." was the soft reply. A pale hand reached out and cupped Roy's cheek, a metal one wrapped around the older man's back and pulled him closer. Sitting up, Ed melded his lips to Roy's. The two soon collapsed onto the bed and Ed got what he had been wanting since he had woken up that morning. Roy also got to see Ed in that compromising position that he had been thinking about earlier.
A/N: The idea for this story came to my last night when I was vacuuming and my cat kept running away from me with a terrified look in his eyes. It got me thinking about why he might be so scarred of the vacuum and poof! a one-shot was born. Of course my cat's tail has never been sucked up by a vacuum so I don't think that he has a very good excuse for being scared.
Wind to thy wings!
-SW