**Cloud's POV**
"The knife felt hot in my hand. I remember the adrenaline rush, my arms tingling with a strange weightless feeling. Slowly, I crept up the stairs. Every pound of my body felt heavy on the wooden floor as I inched towards her room. Gently, I pushed open the door, careful not to make too much noise. And there she was, lying in bed, asleep.
"She was smiling, her eyes closed, looking like an angel curled up. I gently pressed the blade of the burning knife in my palm and I remember it sliced open my finger, the neatly cut flesh stung, weeping blood. I watched the blood flow, fascinated by the rich red color, this liquid that kept me alive seemed so unimportant in small doses.
"The moonlight shone in through the open window upon her face, gleaming like a pearl in a sea of black waters. My heart pumped faster and faster and I smiled, enjoying the excitement adrenaline brought. Her hair so perfectly lined her face she could have been a doll in a toy store.
"I leaned closer with the knife, letting the tip of the twisted blade rest on her pale cheek, watching it rise and fall with her breathing pattern. The blade glittered silver in contrast with her rich chestnut hair, her almond shaped eyes still closed, still unaware of my presence.
"I'm not quite sure what happened next. I just remember pulling the blade across her cheek feeling the soft resistance of her flesh against my slight pressure applied. Her blood spilled from the red slit in her cheek and ran down the blade, coating it in shiny slippery red gleam.
"She woke up then, feeling the sudden pain, I would imagine. Her brown eyes were wide in shock, staring at me as she put her hand over her face feeling rich warm blood covering it. She opened her mouth to scream as her eyes darted to the bloodied knife I held in my hand. The moment felt great as fear spread across her face and her eyebrows tilted back in appalled shock against my unwanted presence.
"But she didn't scream. She held out her hand shining with blood and her expression changed to begging for mercy. 'Cloud!' She sputtered, her lips and eyes trembling with a thousand unspoken words, waiting to be heard.
"I actually didn't recognize my name. The word seemed foreign to me at the time. I shut my eyes, shaking my head because I think my vision got blurry here or something, I don't remember. I grasped the handle of the knife tighter-it was slippery with blood. 'Cloud!' she screamed again closer, grasping my hand holding the knife, trying to ease it away from me.
"But I couldn't hear her. The moment was too great, I couldn't let her ruin it now. I swung down with the knife, the blood stringing through the air, right through the side of her arm. I could feel the blade rip through the tough muscle, not to deep as to reach bone. Delicious blood tore through the air as she let out a shriek and met me with a sharp punch to my jaw.
"I remember hitting the wooden floor with a crack, my jaw swelling from the hard hit. The knife had fallen from my grasp and everything was blurry and red. Then a blinding light stung my eyes as someone turned on the room's lights. I heard voices and footsteps of people running.
"I was lying on the floor holding my dislocated jaw in pain, looking up through a strange glare of light to see Cid and Barrett around Tifa, talking very fast. She pointed at me, her eyes alone accusing enough in a terrified look of horror and anger.
"I couldn't speak. My voice was lost in the waves of my emotions bubbling within myself. Cid stomped over to me, rage in his voice. 'Little piece of shit!' he growled and punched me right in the face, sending me sprawling backwards onto the floor. A fresh shot of pain ignited through me coupled with the pain hanging in my jaw.
"My eye was aching now as the blood vessels broke around it with the second punch from Cid. I tried to hold up my arms in defense, but found they were too heavy to lift. My right eye had swollen shut and Cid's fist continued battering my face. Seconds passed and my lip was bleeding severely.
"I coughed, swallowing the hot copper taste of my own blood caught in my mouth. Finally I heard Tifa yell something out and Cid went back over to her.
"I lay painfully on the floor, my dislocated jaw, swollen eye, bloody nose and bleeding lip rippled waves of unbearably excruciating pain. I writhed and tried crawling towards them, wanting to yell out, but my jaw wouldn't move.
"Barrett's footsteps echoed heavy in my ears as he walked over and kicked me right in the face sending shooting pain to my freshly broken nose as everything went black. I don't remember any much more than that," I sat back, my story concluded.
"Oh, and then I woke up here. That's it though," I added, my jaw still sore from all the talking. It had healed over the two weeks I had been here, but my face still hurt from Cid's punches.
"Why did you want to harm Tifa in the first place?" The psychiatrist adjusted his glasses; his eyes were warm and welcoming under the lenses.
"It was just such a rush of adrenaline. I...It's really an indescribable feeling. The shiny silver blade of the knife with my fist wrapped around the handle and her sweet unsuspecting face, so eager to be cut. I couldn't have stopped myself if I wanted to," I admitted, smiling when I thought of the weightless sensation I had had.
"But Tifa was very hurt and had to spend a day in the hospital for three thousand stitches on her arm and four hundred stitches on her cheek," he said reading off a piece of paper from the hospital.
"I wish I hadn't done that to her," I replied, thinking of nothing better to say. "I...I don't know what made me do what I did..."
"Well, don't worry. We can help you here. But right now, I'll need to have a nursing assistant escort you back to your room. We'll schedule another appointment soon," he smiled at me in a friendly way and I nodded.
"When can I see Tifa again?" I asked him, wanting to apologize now more than ever for what I did although I can't think of why I did it in the first place...
"She can visit here if she likes, but right now you'll have to go to your room," he smiled, calling on of the nursing assistants over.
The assistant was a big strong guy with a friendly face. I'm sure he could beat the hell out of me if he really wanted to, but his eyes were very friendly.
"Wait, one last thing. We ran a test on a blood sample from you and were you aware that your blood contains both Mako and Jenova?" the doctor squeezed his eyes in puzzlement.
"Yeah, yeah I was aware," I smirked and let the assistant lead me back to my room.
I stared at the sign I passed on the way: Midgar Asylum Level 5B
This always made me laugh because it wasn't in Midgar. It was actually in Junon. Who made up the name anyway? And why name it "Midgar" when it was in Junon? Was it in memory of the old Midgar City? It should be called "Junon Asylum," right?
"Hahahahahaha!!" I let out a long happy laugh that echoed down the corridors. This world I live in has become so stupid! "Midgar!" I shouted and laughed some more thinking about the asylum name.
"That's crazy!" I told the assistant who just nodded and smiled as he led me back into my room. "Junon, not Midgar!" I shouted to him, tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks. The assistant locked the door and left me in my solitude.
But I always preferred solitude anyway...even when I was laughing my ass off over the stupid name of my building. Solitude was always so comforting to me...Alone...
"The knife felt hot in my hand. I remember the adrenaline rush, my arms tingling with a strange weightless feeling. Slowly, I crept up the stairs. Every pound of my body felt heavy on the wooden floor as I inched towards her room. Gently, I pushed open the door, careful not to make too much noise. And there she was, lying in bed, asleep.
"She was smiling, her eyes closed, looking like an angel curled up. I gently pressed the blade of the burning knife in my palm and I remember it sliced open my finger, the neatly cut flesh stung, weeping blood. I watched the blood flow, fascinated by the rich red color, this liquid that kept me alive seemed so unimportant in small doses.
"The moonlight shone in through the open window upon her face, gleaming like a pearl in a sea of black waters. My heart pumped faster and faster and I smiled, enjoying the excitement adrenaline brought. Her hair so perfectly lined her face she could have been a doll in a toy store.
"I leaned closer with the knife, letting the tip of the twisted blade rest on her pale cheek, watching it rise and fall with her breathing pattern. The blade glittered silver in contrast with her rich chestnut hair, her almond shaped eyes still closed, still unaware of my presence.
"I'm not quite sure what happened next. I just remember pulling the blade across her cheek feeling the soft resistance of her flesh against my slight pressure applied. Her blood spilled from the red slit in her cheek and ran down the blade, coating it in shiny slippery red gleam.
"She woke up then, feeling the sudden pain, I would imagine. Her brown eyes were wide in shock, staring at me as she put her hand over her face feeling rich warm blood covering it. She opened her mouth to scream as her eyes darted to the bloodied knife I held in my hand. The moment felt great as fear spread across her face and her eyebrows tilted back in appalled shock against my unwanted presence.
"But she didn't scream. She held out her hand shining with blood and her expression changed to begging for mercy. 'Cloud!' She sputtered, her lips and eyes trembling with a thousand unspoken words, waiting to be heard.
"I actually didn't recognize my name. The word seemed foreign to me at the time. I shut my eyes, shaking my head because I think my vision got blurry here or something, I don't remember. I grasped the handle of the knife tighter-it was slippery with blood. 'Cloud!' she screamed again closer, grasping my hand holding the knife, trying to ease it away from me.
"But I couldn't hear her. The moment was too great, I couldn't let her ruin it now. I swung down with the knife, the blood stringing through the air, right through the side of her arm. I could feel the blade rip through the tough muscle, not to deep as to reach bone. Delicious blood tore through the air as she let out a shriek and met me with a sharp punch to my jaw.
"I remember hitting the wooden floor with a crack, my jaw swelling from the hard hit. The knife had fallen from my grasp and everything was blurry and red. Then a blinding light stung my eyes as someone turned on the room's lights. I heard voices and footsteps of people running.
"I was lying on the floor holding my dislocated jaw in pain, looking up through a strange glare of light to see Cid and Barrett around Tifa, talking very fast. She pointed at me, her eyes alone accusing enough in a terrified look of horror and anger.
"I couldn't speak. My voice was lost in the waves of my emotions bubbling within myself. Cid stomped over to me, rage in his voice. 'Little piece of shit!' he growled and punched me right in the face, sending me sprawling backwards onto the floor. A fresh shot of pain ignited through me coupled with the pain hanging in my jaw.
"My eye was aching now as the blood vessels broke around it with the second punch from Cid. I tried to hold up my arms in defense, but found they were too heavy to lift. My right eye had swollen shut and Cid's fist continued battering my face. Seconds passed and my lip was bleeding severely.
"I coughed, swallowing the hot copper taste of my own blood caught in my mouth. Finally I heard Tifa yell something out and Cid went back over to her.
"I lay painfully on the floor, my dislocated jaw, swollen eye, bloody nose and bleeding lip rippled waves of unbearably excruciating pain. I writhed and tried crawling towards them, wanting to yell out, but my jaw wouldn't move.
"Barrett's footsteps echoed heavy in my ears as he walked over and kicked me right in the face sending shooting pain to my freshly broken nose as everything went black. I don't remember any much more than that," I sat back, my story concluded.
"Oh, and then I woke up here. That's it though," I added, my jaw still sore from all the talking. It had healed over the two weeks I had been here, but my face still hurt from Cid's punches.
"Why did you want to harm Tifa in the first place?" The psychiatrist adjusted his glasses; his eyes were warm and welcoming under the lenses.
"It was just such a rush of adrenaline. I...It's really an indescribable feeling. The shiny silver blade of the knife with my fist wrapped around the handle and her sweet unsuspecting face, so eager to be cut. I couldn't have stopped myself if I wanted to," I admitted, smiling when I thought of the weightless sensation I had had.
"But Tifa was very hurt and had to spend a day in the hospital for three thousand stitches on her arm and four hundred stitches on her cheek," he said reading off a piece of paper from the hospital.
"I wish I hadn't done that to her," I replied, thinking of nothing better to say. "I...I don't know what made me do what I did..."
"Well, don't worry. We can help you here. But right now, I'll need to have a nursing assistant escort you back to your room. We'll schedule another appointment soon," he smiled at me in a friendly way and I nodded.
"When can I see Tifa again?" I asked him, wanting to apologize now more than ever for what I did although I can't think of why I did it in the first place...
"She can visit here if she likes, but right now you'll have to go to your room," he smiled, calling on of the nursing assistants over.
The assistant was a big strong guy with a friendly face. I'm sure he could beat the hell out of me if he really wanted to, but his eyes were very friendly.
"Wait, one last thing. We ran a test on a blood sample from you and were you aware that your blood contains both Mako and Jenova?" the doctor squeezed his eyes in puzzlement.
"Yeah, yeah I was aware," I smirked and let the assistant lead me back to my room.
I stared at the sign I passed on the way: Midgar Asylum Level 5B
This always made me laugh because it wasn't in Midgar. It was actually in Junon. Who made up the name anyway? And why name it "Midgar" when it was in Junon? Was it in memory of the old Midgar City? It should be called "Junon Asylum," right?
"Hahahahahaha!!" I let out a long happy laugh that echoed down the corridors. This world I live in has become so stupid! "Midgar!" I shouted and laughed some more thinking about the asylum name.
"That's crazy!" I told the assistant who just nodded and smiled as he led me back into my room. "Junon, not Midgar!" I shouted to him, tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks. The assistant locked the door and left me in my solitude.
But I always preferred solitude anyway...even when I was laughing my ass off over the stupid name of my building. Solitude was always so comforting to me...Alone...