FOOL'S GOLD

Summary: Love makes people do crazy things and Zhuge Liang and Jiang Wei are about to find that out when they test a special love-at-first-sight concoction on the Three Kingdoms and create havoc.

+Chapter one: Trial and Error+

Zhuge Liang triumphantly pulled out a small brown bag from his robes and flourished it before his protégé who stared at the object with great awe. They were alone in the room of Zhuge Liang. The doors and the windows were left wide open, allowing much sunlight to protrude. Smugly chuckling, Zhuge Liang said to him, "Jiang Wei, do you know what this is? It is a special love concoction that makes one fall madly in love with the first person you see."

With a skeptical look, Jiang Wei slightly tilted his head sideward. "Are you sure it's real, Prime Minister?"

"Actually, I just got it in a store in the city." Zhuge Ling replied, shaking the bag a little, "It's probably just a special mixture that affects certain hormones in the body. It's effect will probably work for about a week or so."

"Well, as long as the Prime Minister thinks it's real, then that's good enough for me!" Jiang Wei merrily chirped, clasping his hands together, "Have you tried it out on anybody yet?"

Shaking his head, Zhuge Liang replied, "Not yet…I'm not really sure how to go about using it."

A sudden sly look seemed to take over Jiang Wei's face at the moment. His lips curled into a grin as he moved closer to Zhuge Liang. He slowly moved closer to the Prime Minister's ear.

But Zhuge Liang remained calm, let alone for a slight blush on his face. He could feel Jiang Wei breathing against his cheek.

Twirling Zhuge Liang's mustache, Jiang Wei whispered into the Sleeping Dragons ear with in a low voice, "Why don't we test it then, Prime Minister?"

"What for?" Zhuge Liang asked. His voice was steady and firm. The tension was so thick Zhuge Liang felt it weighing down on him and wrapping around him.

"Just to see the reaction. It'll be fun and slightly educational. What do you say?"

"That sounds interesting." The Sleeping Dragon remarked as Jiang Wei moved back from him.

"YAY!" Jiang Wei suddenly cheered, throwing his arms in the air, "Oh, Prime Minister, this is going to be so much fun!" He then proceeded to skip around the room like an ecstatic child.

The Shu strategist sighed. What am I getting myself into?

+Fool's Gold+

Jiang Wei peeped into the hollow piece of reed as Zhuge Liang wrapped a pinch of the love concoction into a small ball with some thin cloth they borrowed from Yue Ying's room. The two were seated on the floor of the Shu dining room. There was a long circular wooden table surrounded by chairs in the middle of the room. The walls were adorned with many paintings and decorative swords and spears.

Winking at his mentor, Jiang Wei asked, "Now, who should we try it on first, Prime Minister?"

"Probably the first person we see…" the Sleeping Dragon answered, finishing up with his wrapping. He handed three of the small balls to Jiang Wei and carefully put the rest back into the bag, which he then tied to a sash around his waist.

"P-prime Minister!" Jiang Wei suddenly gasped as he grabbed his mentor's wrist. He then dove under the dining table, dragging Zhuge Ling down with him.

"What is it?" the Shu strategist asked, arching a brow as Jiang Wei clamped his hand on hid mouth.

Jiang Wei pressed his finger to his lips. "Shush. I heard someone by the door."

The two crouched low, keeping their chins pressed against the floor as the door slowly creaked open and Liu Bei came in.

There was a puzzled look on his face. "That's funny…"he remarked to himself, "I thought I heard someone in here."

Quickly, Jiang Wei held the reed to his mouth and blew on it. One of the small balls Zhuge Liang had given him flew out and hit Liu Bei on the back of the head. A small cloud of reddish dust appeared causing Liu Bei to sneeze.

"What are you doing?" Zhuge Liang asked in a hushed voice. He looked rather surprised.

Blinking, Jiang Wei turned his head to Zhuge Liang. "I thought you said we'd try it out on the first person we see?"

"I know, but Lord Lie Bei?" Zhuge Liang snapped, "What if he sees that sad excuse for a human being, Wei Yan?"

Jiang Wei stopped to think for awhile. "Umm…we'll have one butt-ugly empress?" he then said.

Zhuge Liang looked slightly cross. "And that would be a bad thing of course."

Suddenly, Jiang Wei turned and hurriedly pushed another ball into the reed. He then blew it towards the door.

"What're you doing now?" Zhuge Liang barked.

"I heard someone at the door, Prime Minister." Jiang Wei replied, inching towards the direction of the door, "Wait, I'll check who it was."

He has rather good hearing…Zhuge Ling shook his head. "How could you do something so reckless?" he asked, "Well, who is it?"

His protégé only giggled. "You need to see for yourself, Prime Minister."

Arching a brow, Zhuge Liang crawled nearer to Jiang Wei.

They saw Liu Bei staring at Guan Yu blankly.

"Oh gods, no…"Zhuge Liang moaned, slapping his forehead.

Suddenly, Liu Bei's face was slightly flushed in pink. His eyes were sparkling. He spread his arms out and ran towards Guan Yu. "Brother!" he muttered, running into Guan Yu's open arms. The background faded into a swirl of pink flowers and sparkling hearts bursting into colorful fireworks. The faces of Guan Yu and Liu Bei were filled with utter infatuation for each other. The whole world seemed to vanish into a swirl of mist as they stared into each other's eyes.

A sniffle came from Jiang Wei. "Aw, that's so sweet." Zhuge Liang just stared at him, twitching. Apparently he's enjoying this…I'm feeling sickened on the other hand…At least it's not that detestable retard and it'll only last a week…But still!

"This is wrong on so many levels…"Zhuge Liang said, "Men are not supposed to love other men!"

Turning towards Zhuge Liang, Jiang Wei stuck his lower lip out. "What's wrong with a boy loving another boy, Prime Minister? It's love, plain and simple…"

Zhuge Liang slapped his forehead.

The two oath-brothers looked deep into each others eyes with intense passion. "Brother," Guan Yu said, "Let's go somewhere private." Liu Bei smiled and the two f them exited the room.

"I think I'm going to be sick…" Zhuge Liang groaned, covering his mouth to keep himself from throwing up.

A smile was then pressed on Jiang Wei's face. "This is going to be so much fun, Prime Minister!" he exclaimed, "Now, who will be our next target?"

+Fool's Gold+

To Be Continued…