Echoes
by RubyD
Characters: Axel and Roxas
Summary: A moment in the life of a Nobody, as he ponders what it means to feel nothing.
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They walk down the streets of the World That Never Was.
Roxas wonders if he shouldn't be adding "That Never Was" to every thing else, too. In the World That Never Was, walking through the Streets That Never Were, they looked into the Stores That Aren't and breathed the Air That Wasn't Supposed To Be. Yet they're here, and they're now, and he can't deny that it just is.
"What do you want?" Axel asks as he peers into a darkened window. This was a perfectly formed, empty city with all its lights and homes and businesses. If they wanted they could fall asleep in a new room every night and probably not go through them all in their lifetime.
"What I want?" he repeats. Want. A form of desire. Similar to need, but not quite – needs are essential. The goal of a want is to achieve happiness in the end. What will make you happy, Roxas thinks is what the question really means. He doesn't know but he answers, still, "Lets get something to eat."
"Here?" Axel scoffs. "You know that everything tastes dead."
"No, not here… not the castle either."
"Right, those guys don't know an egg from a spoon." And they laugh a little.
He thinks the laughter feels real and that the air bubbling from his lungs and throat isn't just a physical memory of what it is to be happy: he thinks he's happy, but the logical part of his mind knows he's not. Maybe he doesn't want emotions to be just a remembered ached, or the lingering beats of a phantom limb. Something tells him that the feel of holding on to a friend should be warm, hot, or even fiery.
"Lets go away from here," he says suddenly. "Just the two of us."
"What, were you expecting company?" Axel smiles and raises a brow, his head cocked to the side. Every bit the perfect imitation of amusement but, like the city around them - Roxas realizes - maybe it wasn't real. What made a city were the people inside, and what made a person was…
"No," Roxas says, his mouth suddenly dry. "I mean, away from all of this."
Axel's look suddenly grows dark, and Roxas wonders if he can take back what he said. He doesn't like the expression on the flame-welder's face at all.
"You mean, from Organization XIII?" And suddenly the air is tense. Axel's loyalty to the Organization, and whatever drives him, is complete.
"No…" Roxas repeats after a moment. He smiles then, and tries not to stumble over his words. "Just kidding. Lets just go to another world to eat." Axel still watches him, so he keeps trying, "I heard Demyx talking about some place run by a bunch of ducks."
The red-head nods slowly, and considers this. "I think I've been there. Three of them, I think – ducks, that is. Don't ask for anything with chicken, though."
"Hmm, I don't think I will."
"Geez, Roxas, don't scare me like that," he says while cuffing him on the head. "I was worried for a moment."
Were you, he wonders. But Roxas smiles again, and he thinks it feels easier this time. With a wave of his hand, a dark corridor opens up to bring them to a place where there are people, and in a city not just full of darkness.
"I'll race you there," Axel says with a silly grin. "The loser buys dinner, what do you say?"
"I say stop talking and start -- running." He dashes by, shorter legs working hard to compensate for when Axel catches up in his longer strides. Roxas thinks, Yes, this is what I want. Maybe. He forgets his worries – for who needs to remember what was never felt – and thinks about ordering turkey instead. They're laughing again, the both of them, a sound that echoes after the portal has closed and leaving nothing behind but shadows of what used to be.
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End