Hikari: ((cries)) It's almost over! Just this last chapter!
Yawi: There, there...
Leon: You're comforting her?
Yawi: No, I'm telling the delivery man where to put the party stuff!
Leon: Oh. ((comforts Hikari instead))
Hikari: ((sniffs)) Well, if anyone wants a little more Holidays by Bakura fun, Moments Before Holidays is a collection of sidestories to this! I love you all! Especially the reviewers, the twenty-three people who have this on alert or favourites, the five dears who have it on both alert and favourites, and the two "godfathers" of this fic, my brother Yoshi and my Beta Phish, Largo!
Hikari: This is the last disclaimer! I, Hikari of the Moon, do solemnly swear that I do NOT own Yugioh, nor am I making any money off of this fanfiction. Now, go enjoy the final chapter! It's longer than normal, just for you!
On March 31st, the town of Domino was buzzing with activity. But the atmosphere felt...tense. As if this was the eye of the storm. The false calm during a tornado.
The activity was everyone making sure they had everything they needed to survive work, school, or vacation the next day. For the next day would be the final showdown between two feuding forces.
...Yes, this is still Holidays by Bakura! You haven't hit a wrong link! Just give me a minute to explain!
The feuding forces, in this case, were the hikaris and the yamis. All the anger and retaliation they'd been through over the past three or so months had reached its head. So, they had come to an agreement: Whoever pranked the other side the most and the best on April Fool's Day would be the winner in this impromptu war. And since using only the hikaris and yamis that were feuding would leave just two on each side, they were allowed a maximum of two other people to join their side.
The hikaris drafted Yami, who had incentive help them, and Yugi, who was a fellow hikari and would show them the light of reason incase they got too wrapped up in the war.
The yamis had chosen their friend Mokuba, and Shawn. They proclaimed that the lighter was practically a separate person, and besides, they only needed those three to beat the hikaris.
And so, the stage was set. In order to save some face, Ryou slept over at Malik's house and Marik at Ryou's apartment with Bakura, so that there would be no unofficial pranking in the night.
The rules were as follows: Time limit: Midnight to midnight, April Fool's Day. No extremely mean pranks, like putting hair-removal cream in a shampoo bottle. All pranks were to be listed, so that any un-triggered ones could be removed after the day was up. No stealing the other team's list of pranks. No adding team members, however, you could get one other person's help only for one prank.
Beyond that, it was all systems full throttle.
T-minus three hours and counting.
----
Bakura, Marik, and Mokuba were spending those last few hours plotting. The first two were on a speaker phone, and talking to their younger partner. "So, girly--"
"I AM NOT A GIRL!"
Bakura snickered. "It's more fun that way, though."
"Don't we need to be serious now?"
Marik nodded.
"...Marik says yes."
Marik blinked. "What-- OH! Sorry Mokuba! I forgot you weren't here in person!"
Mokuba laughed. "It's fine, stupid. Now come on, do you guys have the plans or what?"
Bakura nodded and said, "Yup." He pulled a notepad out from his pocket and consulted it. "We have at least ten different pranks for tomorrow."
"But," Marik added, "We can't use all of them. So we'll have to choose some now. You sure this is a secure line?"
"Where did he learn how to say that?"
Bakura chuckled. "He's been watching spy movies."
Marik laughed. Mokuba smiled on his end. "Figures. But yeah, this line's secure. It's actually my brother's."
"So it's definitely secure! Alright! Time for business!"
Bakura nodded. "Marik's right, time to get to work. The first prank on the list is..."
----
Around the same time that the scheming trio was making their final decisions on their pranks, the 'good' quartet was also on the phone. Only, they weren't plotting their pranks. Being the smart ones, they'd already done that. No, they were doing something much more important.
Playing three different video games and talking about all of them at once.
...For the sake of all of our sanities, let's not listen in on that. Just know that they were mentally preparing for the battle.
----
The clock chimed midnight.
The alarm clock in the Mutou family's living room and the clock on the computer in Bakura's room rang out twelve loud chimes.
The two teams smirked. It was now officially April Fool's Day. And the day of the greatest prank war in the history of the city of Domino.
----
Yami cautiously climbed out of bed. Then, he slid on a bar of soap, fell forward, and landed face first in a tub of hair-gel.
A note fluttered down from the ceiling. Yugi, who had looked before he got up and avoided a similar fate by whipped cream, plucked it from Yami's hair and read it aloud.
"Dear Pharaoh, thought you might need more hair-gel, since you use so much daily. We're winning, in case you're wondering. Yours, Bakura, Marik, and Mokuba." Yugi grabbed the phone and gripped it tightly. Which caused it to fly out of his hands and land on the floor.
"P.S," Yami read off the back of the note, "In case you try to call our hikaris, we greased the phone."
----
Bakura and Marik woke up nervous. Well, not exactly nervous. More like, curious. Wondering what the hikaris had managed to do, especially to the apartment, in the four hours they were actually sleeping.
Bakura smiled as he stood up. "I'll check the living room, you check the bathroom."
Marik nodded and headed off.
Bakura slunk down the stairs like a jungle cat, looking around every corner and watching where he stepped. He was not going to be pranked by the likes of them!
"COLD!"
Bakura blinked and looked back up the stairs. Marik came racing out of the bathroom, soaking wet. "What'd you get?" Bakura asked.
Marik glared, "Bucket of water over the door!"
Bakura stared at his partner. "That? I thought only little kids got hit by those! Aren't you smarter than that?"
"Apparently NOT!" He yelled. His voice suddenly lost its anger as he made a request. "Now, can I borrow some clothes?"
Bakura nodded. "Sure, and throw water on all Ryou's clothing, okay?"
"Alright!"
Bakura then left his partner to his own devices and continued checking the living room for booby traps.
----
Precisely one hour, three shirt changes-- all Marik's-- , two foiled pranks, and one very angry, and very mustard covered neighbor later, the phone rang.
Bakura ran his fingers over it, checking it for grease or other such substances, then, when he found it was untampered with, picked it up. "Hello?"
"B? It's YM."
Bakura groaned mentally. Didn't he already tell Marik no codenames? "Mo-...YM, what's the codenames?"
"I'm using a payphone."
A third voice asked, "They still have those?"
Mokuba blinked. "Who's that?"
Bakura looked upstairs. Marik leaned out of Bakura's room, waving the upstairs phone. "Oh," Bakura said, "It's just...OM on the upstairs phone." He shuddered at using the stupid codenames.
"Well," Mokuba continued with a snigger, "the porcupines fell for both the hair-gel and the greased phone. H-porcupine, however, didn't fall for the whipped cream."
Bakura nodded. "Excellent. We still got most of them."
"Have you fallen for anything yet, Mokuba?"
"Negative, OM."
"...Huh?"
"No."
"Oh!"
Bakura shook his head. "Alright, let's meet up outside OM's house ASAP."
"Roger that, over and out."
Mokuba hung up. Marik and Bakura did the same, the first of which came running down the stairs. "Bakura? How are we going to prank them this early?"
Bakura smiled, "Start walking and I'll tell you."
The yamis quickly put on some shoes and made the trip to Marik's house in record time. Mokuba was already there, waiting.
"There you two are!" He yelled.
Bakura shushed him quickly.
Mokuba blushed slightly. "Right, sorry. So, how're we going to prank them in the middle of the morning?"
"I just asked that!" Marik announced.
Bakura smiled. "Simple. They'll probably be on the phone with the porcupine-heads about now, so it'll be easy to pull the wool over their eyes."
Marik blinked. "Bakura, we didn't bring any wool. Just some rolls of paper, duct tape, and markers."
Mokuba held up the bucket that was sitting beside him. "And these golf balls."
Bakura sighed. "That's just an expression, Marik. Look, here's what we're going to do..."
----
"Then you two need to learn to look before you do anything!" Malik snapped.
Ryou nodded. "Yeah, you two have to learn."
Yugi glared at Yami, since he couldn't glare at either of the two he was mad at, and Yami just sighed. "Boys, you know this is just a game, right?"
Yugi moved the phone away from his ear.
"IT'S NOT JUST A GAME!" Ryou and Malik screamed, "THIS IS REVENGE!"
Meanwhile, outside...
Marik blinked. "Why're they yelling that?"
Bakura shrugged and ripped off a piece of tape. "Don't know, but it means they won't be listening! Mokuba, the balls!"
Back with the hikari's phone conversation...
Yugi moved the phone back to his ear. Yami winced in pain. "My ear! It bleeds!"
Yugi playfully smacked Yami. "Shush, this is a business call." He turned his attention back to the phone. "I know this is your twisted version of revenge. Yami just had a momentary lapse of all common sense. So, have you guys been pranked yet?"
"No. Haven't even had to disable one yet!" Ryou chuckled. "It's like they aren't even trying."
Yugi smirked. "Well, don't get too cocky. You never know when you'll get hit by a prank."
Malik nodded. "Sure, Yugi. Sure. Just leave this to the professionals."
"Whatever. Call us if you need us."
"See ya."
Malik and Ryou hung up their phones. They smirked and headed outside to see the yamis and set up a few more pranks.
If only they'd heard the three hushed whispers of, "Hurry, hide!".
They opened the door. And got hit by a shower of golf balls. Mainly Malik, since he was the actually the one who opened it, but Ryou got pelted by his fair share.
They looked up at the door frame. Someone, or should I say three someones, had taped paper across it to hold hundred of golf balls against the door. When the door opened, they had followed.
Written the paper was a message: "Strike three. You clowns are out. Bakura, Marik, and Mokuba."
Ryou scowled. Malik spat out a golf ball and snarled, "We'll show them!"
Ryou stared at the mocking words on the paper, unable to believe they had been pranked like this without their noticing. "But how?"
"Oh, we can do it. They have a glaring weakness on their team. And, if you're willing to break the rules a little, we can take advantage of it."
Ryou paused for a moment and then replied. "Should we call the Mutous?"
"Nah, let's just meet with them." Malik paced across the floor. "They'll help. Once we destroy the weakness, they'll be weak enough to take out one by one."
"So, what is the weakness?" He finally tore his gaze away from the paper in the doorway and looked at his fellow hikari.
"Marik. And that thing he has against blackberry jam."
"How do we take advantange of that?"
"Quite easily." Malik smacked down the paper and kicked a few golf balls away. "Now, let's meet with those Mutous and get this working. We'll show them!"
----
While the recently pranked duo plotted revenge, the pranking trio was halfway down the street, laughing their heads off at the successful trick. "That was worth the time-crunch!"
Marik agreed with Mokuba quickly, stumbling over a raised part of the sidewalk.
Even Bakura was enjoying himself. For once, he wasn't worried about retaliation today. He truly believed they couldn't beat that, not with the rules they'd set up.
Funny. The theif obeys the rules while his foes are, at that very moment, planning to break them for the victory.
Then Mokuba tripped. Which actually was funny.
----
"...And that's the plan," Malik said with a flourish.
Yami stop humming abruptly. "Isn't that breaking at least one of the rules?"
"Actually," Ryou said, "it's breaking two, since it won't be on the official list."
Yami looked away. "Breaking the rules to win? Are we really going to stoop to their level?"
"...Ummm, yeah."
"That's the plan."
"Sounds like it to me."
He sighed. "Fine, if you hikaris really want to do it like this, count me in." He blinked, then quickly covered his ears to save them from the--
"YES!"
The screams of joy from the hikaris.
"AAAH!"
And the screams of shock when their happy dance landed them in that tub of hair-gel Yami had forgotten to clean out.
"Ah, sweet karma."
----
The two teams met in the park: Ryou and Malik on one side, Bakura, Marik, and Mokuba on the other. It was noon. The sun beat down on the teams as they met, face-to-face, for the first time that day. None of the three on the other team noticed Yugi and Yami weren't there.
"Hey, where are the spike heads?"
...Okay, so Marik noticed.
Malik shrugged. "Getting food."
Bakura accepted it and continued. "How's the morning been?"
"Great, except that Yami landed head-first in hair-gel, Yugi's phone was greased, and we got pelted by golf balls when we tried to leave the house. How'd you get those set up?"
Bakura smirked and patted Mokuba on the head. "Our little Mokuba unlocked your skylight for the first two, and the last, we did it while you were on the phone."
Malik nodded. "Smart. So, how many did you fall for so far?"
"Well, I disabled at least five," Bakura started.
"And...And I fell for one," Marik admitted. "That bucket over the bathroom door."
Ryou and Malik looked at each other for a fleeting second, then burst out laughing. "Who falls for that?" Ryou said between laughs.
"Me." Marik said, blushing through his natural tan. "I wasn't looking!"
Mokuba blinked. "Why's it taking so long for Yugi and Yami to get food?"
Malik held in a smirk. "Oh, I think I see them coming."
Bakura smiled. "Great. They getting anything for us?"
Ryou nodded. "Yeah, they've got something for you..."
Bakura's smile fell off his face. Something about this didn't feel right all of a sudden. He focused on Ryou's line of sight, and noticed he was looking behind them. He turned around, a second too late.
Yugi and Yami had already moved forward and, while Bakura watched, dumped a bucket of something dark and sticky on to Marik.
Mokuba dipped a finger in the goo and licked it. "Hmm...Blackberry."
Marik's whole body clenched. He knew what this was. "Get it off," he commanded through clenched teeth, his eyes growing wide.
Bakura walked around Marik and put a hand on Mokuba's shoulder. "Kid, get him cleaned off fast. I'll explain later."
Mokuba nodded, confused, but dragged a shellshocked Marik away.
Bakura watched after them. Then, when they were out of sight, he changed. He glared viciously at his four opponents. "Did ANY of you remember that little rule, 'Don't do overly-cruel pranks'! Because it doesn't look like you did!"
Malik smirked. "We remembered it."
"We just didn't listen!" Yugi exclaimed.
Bakura turned his focus to Yugi and Yami. "And I thought you two would object. Especially you, Yami. Aren't you the symbol of truth and justice or something like that?"
He shook his head. "You know what, forget it? I'm pulling out the stops. You four are going down! I'm going to hit you where it hurts most.
I've got twelve hours to make your lives miserable! And I'm going to do it!" Bakura glared and, with a swish of a cape that I could've sworn he wasn't wearing before, he stormed off after his teammates.
He ran as fast as he could after his friends. He found them standing in front of someone's house, Mokuba setting down a hose and Marik sopping wet with a dark puddle under him. Marik leapt out of it. "Did it have to be cold water?"
Mokuba shrugged. "Bakura said to do it fast and I couldn't figure out the temperature control."
"And you did nice work Mokuba," Bakura said. He slung an arm around his best friend. "How you feeling?"
Marik smiled sheepishly. "A lot better now that that...stuff is off me. But..."
"But?"
"I'M WET!"
Bakura chuckled. "Well, let's get you dried off. We have some plans to make."
"Plans?" Mokuba asked.
"Yup. We've got about three hours to figure out how to hurt those hikaris and Yami the most, and nine to put those into action."
----
The brainstorming took a little while. Partly because Marik kept changing his clothing during the meeting, and partly because Mokuba had to remind them that, no, throwing them in the lake with cement shoes is not a viable option.
They'd finally gotten their act together, though. Mokuba called his brother for help, which wasn't cheating at all, since they remembered they could get one person to help with a prank. Seto had instantly agreed once he'd heard he'd be helping to get Yami.
Bakura had allowed Marik to codename the acts of evil they were about to commit. You know, to help him feel better after the trauma of getting that horrid stuff dumped on him.
Operation: REVENGE! COLD BLOODED REVENGE! was ready.
----
Step One: Get Yugi and Yami
The above-mentioned duo was sitting in their living room. All was normal until...
"Yugi. Spirit-Guy."
They looked up. Seto Kaiba was standing in their living room, the Kaiba-brand smirk planted firmly on his face. "Need something?" Yami asked.
Seto just kept on smirking and stepped to one side, revealing Mokuba burning their deck boxes.
That got their attention. "OUR CARDS!"
Seto touched the logo on his cloak. The one that doubled as a communicator. "B? This is S and YM. Phase one complete." And then, Mokuba and he ran for their lives.
----
Bakura nodded. He was standing in an alley, waiting. "Roger that, S. Phase two beginning." He stepped out of the alley, right in the path of Ryou. "Hey hikari. Guess what?"
Ryou blinked. He opened his mouth and--
Got bound up by magic chains, courtesy of the Millennium Ring and a duel monsters card.
"You're about to get a makeover." Bakura said, not feeling silly in the slightest. He walked around Ryou and toyed with his hair. "Let's see...How about a hair cut?" He pulled a pair of scissors out of his pocket. "About shoulder length good for you?" He waited a second like he expected a response from the gagged boy. "Great!"
A few snips later, white hair littered the sidewalk and Bakura was walking away, talking into his radio. "OM? This is B. Phase two complete. Begin phase three." With a wave of his hand, he released Ryou and broke out into a run.
----
"Okay, B! If you say so!" Marik put away his radio and counted. "Three...two...one..."
"AAAHHH!"
Marik laughed, but held it in. That was the sound of Malik getting soaked. Now he just had to wait.
Five minutes later, Malik walked out of his house. Marik stood up and smiled at him. "Hey Malik! I like the skirt!"
Malik was fuming. Thanks to Marik, his pants were all gone and the only thing left in his closet was a lavender mini-skirt. "I'm going to get you!"
Marik "eep"ed and ran from Malik, who only stopped to kick the men who didn't recognize him. Those would be the ones making cat-calls and wolf whistles.
While running, he pulled his radio back out. "B! S! This is OM! My target is chasing me fast! Head to the dump destination?"
"This is S. That's where YM and I are. Can you guys hurry? YM can't hold them off much longer!"
"B here. My target's almost there!"
Marik said, "Okay!" He looked back and sped up. "We'll be there soon!"
----
Bakura and Marik ran into the same clearing in the park they'd been at a few hours ago, Ryou and Malik on their tails. They ran straight at each other, but at the last second, they swerved. The hikaris, however, didn't.
"OW!"
"HEY!"
Bakura and Marik walked back to Mokuba. Seto stood off to the side. Yugi and Yami stopped chasing Mokuba and knelt down next to Ryou and Malik.
"So, we meet again. This time, without the ambush." Bakura smirked.
Marik smirked too. "Nice hair, Ryou."
Mokuba nodded. "And I just adore that skirt, Malik!"
Yugi stared. "Malik...why are you wearing that?"
In return, Malik smacked him. "He stole all my pants!"
"Actually," Marik said, "I just put them in Ishizu's room."
Yami crossed his arms and glared. "So, why'd you burn our decks?"
Mokuba wagged his finger. "Nuh uh! We burn your deck boxes. Your decks are still in your room."
"Oh."
"Yeah, 'oh' is right!" Bakura snapped. "You hurt one of ours, we hurt all of yours!"
Seto scoffed. "So, when is this going to end?"
They all looked at him. "This isn't any of your business," Malik snapped.
Seto looked at Malik, but quickly looked away. "Oh, shut up and stand up! At this angle, I can see up your skirt! Couldn't you have picked something longer?"
Malik shot up like a rocket. "KAIBA!"
Seto ignored him and continued lecturing. "You morons are going to just keep fighting until someone gets hurt fatally, aren't you? Why don't you just end this?"
"This...was supposed to end it," Mokuba said.
Seto laughed dryly. "Sure. Why don't you just work out an agreement? I'll even help you. Yamis, and Mokuba, no more lighting stuff on fire, getting kids to beat someone up, or otherwise inflicting pain and suffering! Hikaris, and Yami, give them a little break, will you? They're idiots who on't know better."
He glared at both sides. "Now shake on it! Or I'll be the one making your lives miserable!"
Everyone immediately stepped up and starting shaking hands. Yugi even shook his own hand once when no one else had a free one.
And so, it draws to a close. It being a year of pranks, laughs, stupidness, screaming, skirts, and fire. A fun year, a sad year, but certainly a crazy year.
Wait, aren't we forgetting someone?
Bakura smiled brightly, pulled out Shawn, and burned a tree to the ground in celebration of the truce.
...Now we aren't!
The End!
Hikari: Well, this is it. Yawi's already starting the "We've Finally Finished A Fanfiction" party, so I guess I should hurry. Please review this final chapter, check out the sidestories if that tickles your fancy, and I hope you've enjoyed this ride as much as I have this past year! We've gotten exactly seventy-five reviews and around three thousand hits! Again, I really love you all! Thank you everyone and good bye! ((disappears in a puff of grey smoke...then goes to her party))