Honestly Okay

AN: I do not own Card Captor Sakura

Summary: Every girl has her share of problems, school, parents and loneliness. Sometimes the problem goes away, sometimes it stays and sometimes it gets worse. And it is fine; as long as you have friends. In the end everything will be okay.

Chapter 1

Sakura's P.O.V.

Isn't it just typical that your final and most important year of high school is the year you find the most difficult to cope with? I've never been the bright spark of the group. I had to work hard to get the C's and B's that proudly smiled up at me from my report card. My dad accepted that I would never be the straight A student my brother was, and I recon if he is okay with it then so am I. But recently it got worse.

I struggle to grasp any concept of what is being said in Mathematics. Miss Yen explained it to me so many times that I think she dreams about it in her sleep. I even had to ask Meiling's jackass cousin, Xiao-lang Li, to tutor me. He tries his best and he does seem to succeed where others have failed, but I just can't seem to like him or math. Besides, the only reason he agreed to tutor me was to make up for all the other trouble he caused at school.

And then there is science. Honestly, who cares about Newton's law of gravity? As long as my feet stay on the ground and I know a rock will hit Li on the head when I drop it on him, I do not care. Unfortunately my teacher cares. And when he cares, you care. So much for independent thought.

Tomoyo is no help with science what so ever. She does not even have the subject. Meiling is not interested at all and will do absolutely everything and anything to avoid studying and homework. That left me, yet again, with jackass Li. Despite all his behavioural problems he still stayed on of the top academic students' list. How? I do not know and frankly do not care. As long as he helps me pass, I am happy.

The thing is I am just barely passing. I am scraping through like scraping has never been done before. Well, in math at least. Science is way better. I get a fluctuating C for that now. And even though I hate to admit it, it is thanks to Li. He really does know how to explain something so it is understandable and not just a lot of drabble.

So I have a big fat D on my report card for math, a C for science and a load of B's for the rest of my subjects. Not exactly the kind of report card I hoped to give to my father, but such is life. And I predict a long grounded winter holiday for myself. My only contact with life beyond my house will probably be Li, seeing as dad took it upon himself to prearrange tutor lessons for me this holiday.

I know Li won't complain, he gets paid to sit with me for crying out load. But me, I have to sit through the endless torture of working out equations I really don't think I am ever going to use in my life again! Why, oh why is life so unfair? Why couldn't I've been born with super intelligence? Everyone is going to have a grand time outside playing with snowballs and building snowmen and I will have to sit indoors with the jerk and do math.

I sighed as I opened the front door. At least I got a movie and coffee in with Tomoyo and Meiling before my prison sentence starts. Thank you Mrs Thalani for closing the school a little bit earlier so I could have a bit of fun. It is the only good thing she has ever done, I swear. Stupid headmistress.

"I'm home!" I looked around the room expectantly as I pulled off my jacket and big ass boots. "Dad?"

"Down here, honey!" I sighed again. He's in his study in the basement. I swear, he could start his own archaeological dig right in his own study. Some of those books must have been there for ages and some of them existed for even longer. And some of them I just don't like at all, I get this weird feeling whenever I am close to them. Weird I know, maybe it is because they have math in them.

"Here." I pushed my report card into my dad's hands and he opened it. A frown was on his face most of the time. Like I said, my grades aren't exactly the spitting image of Toya's. There is a reason my brother went to study engineering and I will never even consider anything like that. I knew it, I am so grounded.

"Very good, Sakura." Eh? Good? Did he just say good? "You picked up all your marks quite well. Math still needs a bit of work, but that is what the holiday is here for. You can work on math during the day with your tutor and spend the nights and weekends with your friends."

"I'm not grounded?"

"Honey, why on earth would I ground you? You've been working so hard." I looked down at my dad's smiling face. "How about you and I go out for something to eat tonight? To celebrate your good grades."

"Thanks dad!"

Tomoyo's P.O.V.

Good heavens, I just wish they would shut up! They are always yelling at one another. This one did this, that one did that... I've seen more mature fights on a primary school play ground. Oh wait, this is has gone way beyond any form of maturity level along time ago.

Great, now their voices are getting louder. We live in such a fucking huge house, but they have to yell obscenities at one another right in front of my room. Yes, yes I know the drill. Accuse one another and get it over with. We all know who the guilty party is in any case. Why do they even bother?

I turned my music up. Top volume, maybe then it would keep their voices out, or at least dimmed. Loud and over bearing rock is always a soothing sound or mixture there of when you feel down. I shoved the last of my things in my bag.

Now just to find that CD Meiling lent to me…

Someone hammered on my door and I ignored it. I found the CD under a couple of books and also shoved it into my bag before pulling it onto my back. My door opened and my mother stood glaring at me. "Tomoyo, put that music down."

"Why? So I can listen to you and dad scream at each other?" I pushed the off button on the remote and dumped it on my bed. I walked past my mom without saying a word, same with my dad.

"Where do you think you are going, young lady?"

"To Meiling's."

"I don't think so." I turned to look at my father. His blue eyes were that dangerous shade again, but I don't care. It's not like he would give me a hiding this time around. I'm all grown up, or so they like to say. I ignored that warning look of his and walked down the stairs. "Come back here."

"Why?"

"It's a school night."

"School closed today dad. But I suppose you wouldn't know that, since you are at the office 90 of the time and the times you are at home you and mom yell at each other. Now why the hell would I stick around and listen to you killing one other? My report card is on the kitchen table if you are even interested."

I pulled open the door and walked out into the cold air. It was starting to get dark, and snow was slowly falling down from the grey clouds. I didn't bother to respond to my mom and dad's protests. They can go back to biting one another's heads off, but I am not going to stick around and listen to it.

I have better things to do with my time and since school is finished I don't have to worry about any of that crap either. No homework, no assignments and no tests. I've waited a damn long time to able to say that. Best of all there is no choir. I don't even know why I bother going on with it. It is as boring as hell and I hate the teacher.

I suppose I kept going on with it because it is the only thing dad would come to. Competitions. He likes it when I win, then he can brag to his so-called friends about how well I did. He wants physical proof, trophies, medallions and all that other shit. He could care less about me and less about my grades at school.

Fucking straight A's.

Meiling's P.O.V.

Xiao-lang left me alone today when I got home. The girls cheered me up for most of the day. Half day of school kept us busy to some extent and the movie we watched was quite funny. I would have stayed in that coffee shop we went to afterwards the entire day if Sakura hadn't said she should go home and face the music.

The poor girl has been studying her butt off. My dumb ass cousin likes helping her. His conscience caught up with him when he went to university and now he is trying to make up for all the crap he caused at school by tutoring one of my best friends. That and he likes her, period.

That far off look he gets in his eyes when ever he watches her solve a problem is really starting to annoy me. Why doesn't he just tell her that he likes her? Ask her on a date or something, but for heaven's sake, stop staring. Then again, my cousin is a chicken when he really likes a girl. At least he is getting her to pass.

Today, two years ago…

It still hurts to think about it. I really miss them, even Clare. I stared at the photo on my bed side table. Mom and dad with Clare and me. It was taken days before…

Face it Meiling, you will never be able to bring them back, no matter how hard you wish or how many times you cry. They are gone and there is nothing you can do about it. They all died in that car accident and they didn't take you with. You are left here on earth to go on with your life without them.

No more mom, no more dad and no more sister…

All that is left of them is me. Meiling Li, daughter and sister. I still have Aunty and even though I hate to admit it I have Xiao-lang. The jerk can be nice if he wants to and he does try his best most of the time. Especially when I feel down.

And I have Tomoyo and Sakura. They try their best, even when they don't know it. They can make me laugh and make me feel wanted.

Okay.

They make me feel okay. And that's okay. I closed my eyes and listened to the music softly playing in the background. Aunty was playing the piano again. In my mind I could see her slender, aging fingers glide over the keys, striking selected ones to make a particular sound. All the sounds, from all the keys pressed, mix together to form a beautiful song.

My door burst open and Tomoyo stomped in. She closed the door loudly behind her and dumped her bag in the corner of my room before sitting herself down on the corner of my bed. "I'm crashing at your place for a bit."

"It's cool." She was angry again. She's angry a lot these days. Tomoyo is angry, Sakura is stressed out and I feel depressed. How wonderful for the three of us. We must be feeding of each other's emotions to be this happy. "Do you want some hot chocolate?"

"That would be nice." I pushed myself off my bed and lead Tomoyo down to the kitchen. Xiao-lang was there making himself something to eat, as usual. I swear he is a bottomless pit. How Aunty keeps up with the food bills is absolutely beyond me. "You don't eat Li, you devour."

"Whatever Daidouji." She pulled a face at him and I laughed. "Where is that other friend of yours?"

"Don't pretend that you don't know her name." I chimed as I poured milk into mugs.

"Yeah, we know you dream about her all the time." Tomoyo sat down across from him at the counter. "You want her so bad, it should be illegal."

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Yeah right, and that is why your face is so red. Oh Sakura! Your Romeo has dirty thoughts about you, all day long."

"Don't be despicable."

"I'm not, I am truthful. Admit it Li, you dream about her. You want her so bad that your body aches for her." I watched Tomoyo as she tore at my cousin's soul. She has way of getting to your weaknesses and exploiting them so badly that you wonder whether that pretty face of hers is actually hiding the wicked witch of the west. "Oh well, then I just won't give you this photo I took of her the other day."

"What photo?" Way to go Tomoyo.

"Oh, just some photo Tomoyo took of Sakura when we went to stay over at Sakura's house. Remember? That weekend you had to go to Tokyo?"

"Yeah, so?"

"We just thought this was a particularly good photo of her. You know how shy she is in front cameras." I took the photo from Tomoyo and stared at it. It was actually a rather good one of Sakura. You could see the real her. She was sitting at the dining table with her head supported by her hand. The other hand still held the fork and a big plate of pasta was in front of her.

But the best part of the photo was her smile. It's that soft smile when she is listening to what you are saying. That soft smile that really tells you that she cares, no matter what. And the soft light in her green eyes just intensified it.

Tomoyo grabbed the photo from me. "Oh and look, she is wearing that tight blue shirt you bought her Meiling."

"Give me that." We laughed at Xiao-lang as he pulled the photo from Tomoyo's hand. His face turned scarlet. Oh yeah, score one for the girls, zero for Xiao-lang. Sorry Sakura, but this opportunity is just too good to miss.

"What on earth are you looking at Xiao-lang?"

"Nothing." I bit back my laughter when Aunty came up behind Xiao-lang and he hastily tried to hide the photo.

"Nonsense. It can't be nothing." She pulled it from his grasp. "My, Sakura looks lovely in this picture. I hope you frame it." Tomoyo and I burst with laughter. My cousin's face was classic. I have never seen him that red, since forever. "Hello Tomoyo, dear. Will you be joining us for dinner?"

"If it isn't too much trouble, ma'am."

"Not at all, we're going out tonight."

"Cappuccino's, please let it be Cappuccino's." I begged my aunt.

"Cappuccino's is fine. I'm rather in the mood for a good salad, actually."

"YES!"

AN: Hey people! This is my new fic. Rated for language. Please take note that it is subject to irregular updates. I have a life beyond the Internet. Ha ha!

Normal drill, there will be some typos and grammatical errors. I'm a second language English user. I try to edit my work as much as possible, but sometimes small errors slip past me.

Thank you for at least checking it out!

Tella