OK, so this is incredibly AU, It's based from "Through with you" from Maroon 5. Back story, Hermione and Snape have been having an affair, and Hermione's been getting attached, she's tired of his shit, and thinks he needs a wake-up call!
HG/SS obviously!
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
Can you see me
Floating above your head
As you lay in bed
Thinking about everything
That you did not do
Cause saying I love you
Has nothing to do with meaning it
Laying here thinking about it, I don't know how I could be so stupid. Honestly, he's a teacher, an ex-death eater, and old enough to be my father. I look at the clock and read 12:56 a.m. Great. And I'm supposed to graduate tomorrow. Knowing my luck I would go to give my speech and fall flat n my face asleep. So what's on my mind? None other than Severus Snape. It started at around a month before Christmas this school year. We were working on potions after class and it just sort of happened. I know that sounds so lame and horrible, but I'm not sure how to say it otherwise. And tonight he had the nerve to tell me he loved me? He has no idea; he doesn't know the meaning of love. I love him. But his love is something completely different. Let me start from the beginning.
And I don't trust you
Cause every time you're here
Your intentions are unclear
I spend every hour waiting for a phone call
That I know will never come
I used to think that you were the one
Now I'm sick of thinking anything at all
We were working in the lab again. How amazing he looks there bent over a cauldron with sweat beading on his forehead. He's so, dark. All those buttons, all that clothing, he's always so covered. And it's all black. How is he so attractive to me? In the worldly way of things he is by no means handsome, but I find him so irresistible.
I turn back to my potion clearing my head of such thoughts. Suddenly I feel him behind me. I can hear his breath. With his height he towers over me.
"Ms. Granger"
I did not dare turn around. "Yes, professor?"
He took a bit of my hair and smelled it inhaling the scent deeply. "I find that despite your age, your status, your being muggle born, and you being my student, that I am more than slightly attracted to you. In fact, I can't stop thinking about you. You are all that's on my mind day and night, every minute of my existence. I can understand that you would find these sentiments to be less than pleasing, but if, in any way, you are in as much pain as I am, could we not ease the suffering?"
I turned around and looked in his dark endless eyes and saw nothing but burning passion and lust. I put my hand on his cheek and began to caress his jaw. He leaned in and led me into the most incredible, breathtaking, and mind numbing kiss I have ever experienced, I had had lovers before, but they were the teenagers and adolescents that were available in moments of weakness. As he lifted me onto the table I was next to I shifted and my hands rested on his chest. We removed each others clothing as if un-wrapping a present. He stopped just before entering me "Are you a virgin?" I blushed and shook my head no. I was so scared he was going to stop and run, but to my delight and thrill he continued. The table legs were scratching against the floor and the side was crashing into the other tables, but none of it mattered. That was the first night we joined and "eased the suffering"
Of course the next day in class everything was the same as always. What else did I expect? That he would declare to the world that we were, what, having sex? That's all it was, there were no words of love, only of desire, lust, and attraction.
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
The nights continued this way, during the day he was my cold and distant professor, during the nights he was my one love. I foolishly held my self exclusively for him. He was not like the other neighborhood boys I had been with, they had all wound up following me or pinning after me, this was exactly what I had always wanted, complication free sex. But then why do I feel so wrong and unfulfilled?
Our sex was always amazing; we played out each others fantasies and tamed the demons inside. It was some miracle that we were never caught. We even sometimes made quickies in the broom closet late at night. And sometimes he would floo into my head girl rooms and leave before the sun rose. Needless to say many birth control potions were used.
Do you remember
The way we used to melt
Do you remember how it felt
When I touched you, oh
Cause I remember very well
It got to the point where he was always on my mind. I always wanted him to be there. He confessed one night that he was the same. Around that time the floo-ing into my room increased as he admitted he couldn't sleep without seeing me. Surely this was blossoming into love. Wasn't it?
This whole time I was hoping and praying that he would say it one day just admit it. He must love me if he's seeing me this much, right? If he keeps coming back, it has to mean something.
And how long has it been
Since someone you let in
Has given what I gave to you
And at night when you sleep
Do you dream I would be there
Just for a minute or two, do you?
The truth is, I was the one that got attached. Foolish I know, but when you get so close to someone, can you help but fall for them? Now, looking back, I realize how foolish I was, he simply said that he needed me, and wanted me, he never said he loved me, and in my mind I was so convinced that was what he meant. I remember quite clearly the time I realized it. It was after Easter Holidays. I came back to school; we had spent over a week apart from each other. Would he still want me?
Sure enough he came into my room. I tried to stop him so we could talk, but he was on a war path. He eased all my worries in a hurried sort of matter. Assuring me that I was beautiful and desirable, but always being sarcastic. I more wanted to talk, maybe establish a meaningful connection. I got close to him and that was my mistake. He grabbed my hips and pushed into me violently. There was nothing passionate about this night. It was him satisfying his need. It was over quickly and he redressed and was gone. I cried after he left, feeling I was betrayed and confused.
But being the idiot I am, I still went back to him, how can I resist something so dark and mysterious?
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
He almost became colder to me, even to the point that when I spoke to him he would call me a child and snap at me. I was so hopelessly gone though. Merlin I was a fool for that man. I was convinced that the more he pushed me away the more he really wanted me. What on earth was I thinking? I started to dream of us being married was little dark children. Would he want one or more? How could I have been so stupid?
Heartache, heartache, I just have so much
A simple love with a complex touch
There is nothing you can say or do
I called to let you know I'm through with you
So, now its graduation. The ceremony went off without a hitch. Except Severus was grinning at me. We had promised each other the fucking of a lifetime tonight, to celebrate, as he put it. He had broached the subject of continuing the relationship after I graduated; now it was clear what I must do. I had to give up what I loved, to achieve what I wanted. He would do nothing but hold me to this life, keep me feeling like a teen all the years of my life, I would always be a child, a student. He would always be the grown up, my teacher.
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
I knocked on the door to the lab, I was in a short black skirt and red lace thigh highs and my black robe of course. He answered in a button up black silk shirt and black pants. He looked at my cloak and frowned. I just smirked and made my way to his chambers. Once there I took of my cloak. He followed in, coming in after I had taken off my cloak. He grinned and captured me in another one of his kisses. He bent me over his bed and spanked me hard 7 times (1 for each year) He knew it was one of my kink things. He came in from behind (not anal or anything) he bit my ear and my neck, kissed my shoulder and showered me with such things. We wasted away a night in his chambers. I awoke before he did and reached into my cloak. I pulled out a letter I had written him. I placed it on his bed side table and left silently.
Heartache, heartache, I just have so much
A simple love with a complex touch
There is nothing you can say or do
I called to let you know I'm through,
Called to let you know I'm through,
I called to let you know I'm through with you
Severus-
How can I describe to you how much being with you has meant to me? You have been everything to me, my one constant in life. I have been pleased and thrilled to share your bed, you tables, your desk, your shower, my bed, and my shower. That is why this is hard for me. You are everything I have ever wanted and ever hoped for in a man. You are so damn perfect. Do you remember when you said you loved me? Probably not, it was only once and right after you had came. I have been holding out the hope that, no matter how much you push me away, you would love me as I have loved you. I cannot continue this affair, for reasons I am sure you can understand.
I will always love you, and always believe in you. If you ever need a fried I am here, if you ever need more, I am certain I could never refuse you a thing.
Put simply, I love you, but I can't wait forever, I have to try and find something, see if there is anything else out there for me. Who knows what will happen if we see each other again. You can forget me if you'd like, but I will always love you as my eternal partner.
Love Always
Hermione
I ain't ever coming back to you
So, what did you think? I know it's just sort of, I don't know, there I guess. It's really turned out to be a personal sort of story for me. Let's just say you have to know the situation to write the story.
To the readers of my other stories, I will hopefully be posting something soon. I know it's been a while, but circumstances were beyond my control.
Let me know what you think and if you want a follow up or a version from Severus' POV.
LFJ