Disclaimers: they are not my characters. They belong to other people.

I let you drive my car today. Feigning tiredness I throw you the keys to my beloved car. Threats of violence are not necessary. Brother or not you know what will happen if my car is damaged.

I know you want to talk as we drive towards our next hunt. Towards the next thing that may lead us to dad or get us killed. I don't want a conversation, so I shut my eyes in the patience of sleep. I can hear the thoughts in your head Sammy. A lot of them are for Jess and dad. Then there is the concern you have for me. Concern is something I don't want or need. Concern for a relative only kills you that much quicker. It's why dad and I work so well together. He values me as a follow hunter, but he doesn't care for me. He has no real concern for me. The only person he has ever loved, other than mom is you. Me, I'm just a secondary thought. I'm only there to protect you and dad. I don't mind being the protector, never have. I just have these moments when I ant to be the one who is so well protected.

One thought I van hear from you, the one which I never believed is the thought of love. You love me, but not as a brother. As a brother you have no love for me. No you love me as a partner, as someone you can spend a lifetime with. I guess I never really thought about how you loved me until hearing that particular thought. Thing is Sammy, you love the Dean of four years ago. The Dean who not been the bringer of so much death. The dean who had not been so jaded life. The dean you love doesn't exist, he hasn't for a while. You have no idea what I am capable of Sammy. You don't know me and the lengths I am willing to go to, just to keep you safe. To protect you from harm. The lengths I have already gone to.

You don't love me Sammy. You love Jess, but me, you don't love me.