The Alpha and The Omega

Disclaimer: Nah, I'm still not JK!

A/N My sequel to Love Lost and Found, my K-rated story. This story can be read independently, but there are clear references to the previous one, which would make far more sense if you read that first. This story is rated M, because of some mature scenes later and some mature references. Nothing explicit, purely relevant to the plot, I promise! As the story goes on, you will notice what I think of as 'missing scenes'. These are things the characters talk about, but you won't see. If you would like a particular missing scene written as a one shot proper story, then please tell me when you review, mentioning which particular piece of story. Please read and review.

CHAPTER ONE: ON THE RUN

Lily Potter sat in her living room and tried to focus on the words of the book she was attempting to read. Her head was spinning from yet another day of being cooped up in the tiny flat she lived in with her husband and son.

A shriek of childish laughter cut through Lily's head like a knife. She looked up from her book and glared at her husband. 'James, will you stop swinging Harry around like that! I've only just fed him, if he's sick again I'll…..' but Lily's voice was cut off as her baby son paled before he burped and deposited half of his recently digested meal on his father's shirt. James Potter pulled a face as his son started to whimper fretfully. 'It's all right son, better out than in eh?' he said, pulling the baby close to him as he waved his wand to get rid of the stain the sick had made on his shirt, and wiping the baby's mouth clean. The baby fretted before chuckling again as his father held him close and tickled him gently. 'You were enjoying yourself weren't you son, pretending to be on Daddy's broom', and then he raised Harry above his head again and swung around, drawing a delighted laugh from the child, and a roar from his mother, 'JAMES!' Lily bellowed, rising to her feet.

James Potter instantly stopped what he was doing. He sighed and looked at Lily who had gone red in the face. He tried to smile nonchalantly. 'Oh come on love, he's having a good time! A little bit of baby sick doesn't matter, I've cleaned it up and….' Lily glared furiously. 'James it does matter! That's the third time this week he's thrown up over you, I'm sick of it!' Lily's emerald eyes were shining with temper.

James lowered Harry down again and held him in his arms. The baby started to whimper softly at the sound of his mother's raised voice. James looked at his wife and frowned, 'Lily, would you just calm down, honestly, it's just a bit of baby sick, in the scheme of things it hardly matters, does it?' he could feel himself getting irritated. He knew any minute now, if something didn't happen, he would be having a full scale argument with his wife – again. Lily's eyes narrowed angrily. 'Oh no, of course it doesn't matter! It doesn't matter one bit that I spend ages feeding Harry just for you to turn around and start throwing him in the air like he's a bloody Quaffle, and then having him throw up yet again on one of your shirts, which, coincidentally, I wash!'.

James Potter groaned in irritation. 'Oh for God's sake Lily, I've cleaned the stain, just calm down, you're making far too much out of this!' He felt his own anger rising. He took a deep breath. He didn't want another fight. 'Come on love, just relax. You're getting yourself all worked up over nothing' he said reasonably, trying to soothe her.

Lily glared again, 'Oh that's right, I'm getting worked up over nothing! We're cooped up in this grotty place day in and day out, hardly seeing anyone, and never doing anything except worry and jump out of our skins at the slightest noise, and you say I'm getting worked up over nothing! She laughed derisively. James shook his head, finally getting annoyed. 'Lily you know very well I was talking about the bloody shirt! He yelled as his temper reached boiling point. 'You know why we're stuck here. You know damned well, if I could do anything about it I would!' James shook with indignation as he spoke.

Lily laughed scornfully again, her face twisted in fury. 'Of course you would, that's why we've nearly died three times! You've been so bloody good at looking out for us that we're living in this filthy dump, shut up in here, waiting for the day when that madman finds us and kills us, or kills Harry! Sometimes I wish to God I'd never…..' Lily Potter realised instantly that she had gone too far. She shut her mouth before she could say anymore. She looked at James who had gone deathly white. Lily clamped her hand over her mouth as her eyes filled with tears. 'James…..love….I' she tried to form a sentence. The defeated look on his face stopped her. He moved quickly towards her and handed their son to her, who was now crying, scared by the atmosphere in the small room. 'Just forget it Lily, forget it' James whispered, as he turned out of the room and slammed the door.

Lily watched James leave the room and shuddered as he slammed the door behind him. She held Harry to her and stroked his back to comfort him, tears leaking from her own eyes as she soothed his sobs. 'It's all right, Mummy's here, it's all right sweetheart' she soothed. 'Mummy's not cross with you…..she's not even cross with Daddy really….'

Harry Potter looked up at his mother. Lily sighed heavily and tried to smile into the green eyes of her son. Lily felt the familiar rush of love for him. She looked at the face that was so like his father, they had the same black hair, even down to the way it would never lie flat. They had the same features, except his eyes, which mirrored Lily's exactly, almond shaped emerald green eyes. Harry looked at his crying mother and tilted his head as if to wonder what was wrong. Lily smiled at him and stroked his cheek lovingly. He giggled softly, 'Mama!' he cried suddenly. Lily smiled, 'Yes Harry, Mummy loves you too sweetheart….and Daddy loves you, Daddy loves Mummy and Harry very much' Lily said, talking to herself as much as her baby son.

Lily hugged her baby to her as she ran her free hand through her dark red hair. She wiped her tears away and sighed. 'Oh Harry, what are we going to do?' she asked. Harry cooed babyishly. Lily sighed again. 'I've upset Daddy again Harry, why can't I just learn to control my temper? I just hate it, stuck in here day in and day out, not being able to do all the things we wanted to do…all because Voldemort won't leave us alone…..but it isn't Daddy's fault Harry. He's doing everything he can to keep us safe, me and you darling. We're all he's got you see, me and you….and the Marauders of course' she said, smiling softly. 'But Harry, Daddy is doing everything he can, trying so hard to make sure we live, and stay together….and then I go and upset him again!' Lily sighed heavily. Her mind went over the last year, all the trivial arguments she and James had fought, usually started by something stupid, like a spilled drink or anything else that was equally unimportant, considering their lives were in danger. Lily hated fighting with James, but some days the strain they were both under became too much and they ended up taking it out on each other.

Guilt began to flow through Lily. 'Come on darling, Mummy needs to go and say sorry to Daddy while you have your afternoon nap'. For response, Harry yawned sleepily and began to chant 'Daddaddaddadaddadad' as Lily opened the living room door and went to find her husband.

Lily put Harry down in his cot for his nap. She sighed as she remembered the beautiful nursery she and James had prepared at their home in Godric's Hollow, before Harry was born. She vividly remembered how she had spent hours designing the room, and then getting James to paint the walls the Muggle way. She remembered how he had argued that it would have been quicker to do it magically, but he still did as she asked, purely because it was what she wanted.

Lily smiled sadly as she remembered James and his best friend Sirius Black lifting nursery furniture around numerous times, until Lily was happy with the room. She thought of how Sirius had complained every time she changed her mind over where she wanted things, only for James to laugh and say, 'Padfoot, never argue with a pregnant woman. Believe me, for the sake of a quiet life, it's easier to do as you're told'. Then he pulled Lily into his arms and kissed her, saying, 'Whatever makes you happy love, I don't care about anything as long as you're happy'. Sirius growled at that, until Lily hugged him and said she was happy with where everything was now, and he didn't have to lift any more. Sirius beamed at Lily, and hugged her back, saying, 'Good, but I don't care really Lils. Nothing is too much trouble for my Godchild'. Lily knew that was true. Sirius Black, James's longest standing and closest friend doted on Harry as much as James and Lily did themselves.

Now Lily left Harry sleeping peacefully in the tiny room they now used as a nursery, and went through to the room she shared with James.

Lily found her husband sitting on their bed. He had his back to her as she went into the room. Lily quietly closed the bedroom door as she went inside. She walked into the room and went and stood beside James as he sat on his own side of the bed. As he sat, Lily looked down on him and her heart ached.

James Potter was now 21, the same age as Lily. They met at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry; they were in the same house, Gryffindor. James had pestered Lily while they were at school, constantly asking her to go out with him. In their third year he practically stalked her. Lily fought with James almost constantly, refusing his appeals to her, telling him he was 'an arrogant bullying toe-rag' and dismissing him as nothing more than a prankster who thought he could get what he wanted just by asking for it and turning on the charm. The two went on like this until their 7th and final year at Hogwarts.

Two things happened that year that changed Lily's life. James was made Head Boy, despite never having been a prefect, and Lily was Head Girl. Even now Sirius insisted that Dumbledore, the school's Headmaster, was trying to play matchmaker. Then in the November of the 7th year James's parents were murdered by Voldemort's followers, the Deatheaters. Lily still shuddered at the memory of those times. James, who had previously been an outgoing, confident, if arrogant young man, became a mere shadow of himself. He withdrew from virtually everything, refusing to eat and speak to people, unless he was provoked, and then he would just yell and scream at whoever had aggravated his rage. Eventually Lily offered comfort to him and over time the two became friends, and then something more, and were engaged on their very last day at school.

A year later they were married. Then Dumbledore asked James and Lily if they would join the Order of the Phoenix, a group directly involved in the fight against Voldemort, the darkest wizard who ever lived.

Lily looked back now and could hardly believe they could have been so happy and so deeply in love. In those early days, even being in the Order seemed romantic. They both realised the danger they were in, but they were facing it together. Lily knew they felt invincible, that the mere fact that they had each other could get them through anything. Now the danger seemed like a weight, pressing down on both of them. Lily knew James still adored her, as she did him, but their lives had been overtaken by events, which, Lily realised, made them both live in a constant state of fear of losing everything they cherished.

Lily still couldn't believe that an event in their lives that brought them such joy could've led to the danger they now faced. Her mind focused on those times for the millionth time, in a futile attempt to make it make sense…….

When the Potters had been married a few months, Lily discovered she was pregnant. She and James had been so excited, and though it was sooner than they planned, couldn't wait to be parents. Then James and Lily found themselves being directly pursued by Voldemort. At first they thought it was due to their involvement with the Order. On three occasions James and Lily found themselves literally fighting for their lives, only narrowly escaping death. Eventually Harry was born and then the Potter's world changed forever.

Dumbledore contacted the couple to tell them he had heard about a prophecy, which said that a child born at the end of July would be the one who had the power to vanquish the Dark Lord. The prophecy indicated that the child would be born to people who had defied Voldemort three times. James and Lily knew of two children born at the end of July that year. One was Neville Longbottom, born to Alice and Frank Longbottom, who the Potter's knew from school. The other was their son, Harry. Both the Potters and the Longbottoms were in the Order, and both couples had defied Voldemort three times.

Dumbledore said he believed Voldemort seemed sure the prophecy was about Harry and as a result the child was in terrible danger. Voldemort would stop at nothing to get rid of a threat, even if that threat was just a tiny baby. James and Lily had of course tried to convince themselves that the prophecy didn't refer to Harry at all, but that didn't change anything. They both knew that while Voldemort perceived Harry as a threat, he was in danger.

Dumbledore advised James and Lily to give up the training for their careers. Lily was a trainee Healer and James a trainee Auror and then he told them Harry would be safer if they went on the run. The couple did so, believing they would be safe. In time Dumbledore heard rumours that Voldemort had found out where the Potters were and they had to move on again, even further from their own home and the life they had known. Just as they settled in a new place it happened again, which led them to living in this tiny flat that Lily detested with every fibre of her being. Harry was now nearly 15 months old and the danger was still present.

Now Lily looked down on James again. It suddenly struck her that he looked older than his 21 years. He still had the same black hair which stuck up at the back in spite of the many attempts Lily had made to tame it. He still wore his glasses. But the hazel eyes, which used to look like they danced in his head when he found something funny, looked distant. He looked tired and careworn. He looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. Lily's heart ached for him. She quietly knelt at his side and touched his leg. James looked up quickly, startled out of his thoughts by the sudden contact. Lily felt him flinch under her hand. 'James, it's all right, it's just me' she said quietly. Lily watched as he sighed and his shoulders drooped. He stared ahead of himself again, not making eye contact with his wife.

Lily shuddered with shame at the memory of her earlier words to him. She was disgusted with herself for how much she must have hurt him. She cleared her throat before attempting to speak. 'James I'm sorry….I'm so sorry!' in spite of herself Lily started to cry softly. James Potter looked at his wife and shrugged despondently. 'It's all right Lily, you've probably done me a favour, reminding me how useless I am'. His voice was cold and calm, too calm.

Lily's tears continued to fall. She moved so that while she was still on her knees, she was directly in front of James, so he had to look at her. Lily reached out and grasped his hands, which, to her surprise, he didn't pull away. She took that as a good sign. 'James you're not useless, you're a wonderful father and a great husband and I….' but then James did pull his hands out of Lily's. He looked down on her and swallowed hard. Lily could see he was struggling to hold his emotions back. He sighed heavily before speaking again, his voice rising with every word he uttered. 'No, you were right before, I'm useless! I tried to be the big man, getting us wrapped up in the Order, trying to stop Voldemort killing any more people, like he killed Mum and Dad. Then I went and got you pregnant, knowing what a terrible world this is to bring up a child in! I should've stood up to Voldemort better, been more prepared when he tried to kill us, but oh no, I just kept running didn't I? I should've done something then, but I was too bloody scared!' James laughed derisively at himself, shrugging again, as Lily sat and listened, tears still flowing down her face, whilst she shook her head, trying to convince him he was wrong.

James went on, his voice lower and full of pain. 'I wasn't scared of Voldemort Lily. No, the thing that terrified me, that still terrifies me more than anything is the thought of losing you, you and Harry, so I ran. I kept running, thinking that if we got far enough away you'd be all right, but it hasn't worked has it? You're still in danger, Harry's still a defenceless baby, and I'm still terrified, terrified and useless!'

Lily Potter wept as her husband spoke. She could see his handsome features consumed by the pain and fear he felt. She reached out for his hands again and felt him shaking under her touch. 'James, you are not useless. You didn't drag me into the Order! I got involved because I chose to. I made the choice James. I told you when Dumbledore asked us, I wasn't going to sit at home and do nothing while you joined! James, I told you there was no way I was going to let you put yourself in danger if I wasn't with you!' Lily became increasingly desperate to convince James that she had been wrong to be so cruel to him. She went on, her voice becoming firmer. 'You didn't force me to have Harry, it just happened, and I know how much he means to you. I knew from the moment you first held him in your arms James. I know you'd do anything for him, for both of us'. Lily looked James in the eye now, holding his gaze firmly. 'You didn't run James, we both did. We ran because if we hadn't Voldemort would've found us, and then we would've either all been killed or he would've killed Harry, and we both know we just can't lose our baby James, we just can't'.

James Potter met his wife's gaze. 'That's why I was having fun with him Lily. I play around with him because it might be the closest I'll get to teaching him to fly and showing him how to play Quidditch. The thing is Harry needs you at this stage in his life. You feed him, change his nappy and do all the things he needs, and I can't help it if I feel that I might never get a chance to do things with him that fathers do with their sons when they get older. I might never see him on a broom; I might never watch him play Quidditch. He's going to be built like a Seeker Lily, I can tell, and it scares the hell out of me to think that I might not see it….and then there's you….' James hesitated, looking at Lily with anguish in his eyes.

Lily continued to look into James's agonised face. 'What about me James?' she asked softly. James Potter sighed heavily. 'Did you know that sometimes I wake up in the night and just lie there and watch you sleep?' Lily shook her head as James went on, she could see he needed to tell her how he felt. 'I lie and listen to you breathing just so I know you're still there. Each time Voldemort tried to kill us, and damned near succeeded, I was scared out of my mind. Lily when I think of how close he got, how he could've easily taken you away from me, I…..' James's voice broke off as his eyes filled with tears. He swallowed hard before he could go on. 'I'm just trying to do the best I can Lily, and I'm sorry I've let you down so badly. I know it isn't much consolation, but I do love you. I know you probably regret ever laying eyes on me. I know you probably wish you'd run a mile when I asked you to marry me, but I can't help it, I love you, I always will.'

Lily Potter couldn't hold back any more. She flung herself into her husband's arms. He hesitated for an instant before he crushed her to himself. 'Oh James, I don't regret any of the time we've spent together' she said urgently, holding him close. 'I don't regret marrying you James, I never will, I love you! When I think of what I said to you…James I'm so sorry!' Lily wept again as James held her as tightly as she was holding him. 'It's all right, it doesn't matter. It's just this situation' James sighed, trying to comfort Lily. 'We are stuck in this place, and it is terrible, it's no wonder we're getting edgy with one another. I swear to you love, if there was anything I could do to change it, I'd do it in a flash'.

Lily suddenly eased out of James's arms a little. 'James I want to go home to Godric's Hollow' she said simply. James closed his eyes and sighed. 'I know you do love, but we can't. Lily you know as well as I do, if we went home Harry would be in danger. I just can't put him or you in danger like that Lily.' Lily looked back into her husband's eyes. 'There has to be something we can do James, we can't go on forever living like this. We hate it, but it isn't good for Harry either. We can't stay on the run forever, can we?' James shook his head, 'No, but I don't know what choice we have, if Voldemort finds Harry…' he shuddered at the thought.

Then something made James think. He thought about Harry and what kind of life he would have if they remained on the run. He met Lily's gaze again, pulling her back into his arms. 'Lily, do you really want to go home?' he asked. Lily nodded, 'Yes, if we can find a way of keeping Harry safe, I want to go home'. James Potter sighed, 'Right, we'd better speak to Dumbledore, he'll know if there is anything we can do'. Lily didn't reply, she just tilted her head up and kissed her husband firmly on the lips.