"Running"
Author: Katie
He knew if he was going to do this, it would have to be in the night. When no one could see him.
He knew he was being a coward taking off. And he wasn't supposed to be a coward, he was supposed to be the leader. The go-to guy. But he was tired of it. He knew everyone had been through a lot and they have had time to deal with their messed-up situation. But he hasn't. He hasn't had the chance to deal with the fact that they are on this island, or that his dad died, or there are others.
It was the only way.
So he went to the person he knew wouldn't stop him.
"I need to talk to you." He said forcefully.
"Gee, doc, with a tone like that I just am dying to hear what you have to say." He shot back, the sarcasm evident in his voice.
"Look, we've been on this island for 2 months and I have been feeling like-" Jack began but not through a first sentence before Sawyer cut him off.
"Can we cut to the chase? I need sleep to catch up on."
Jack nodded, looking away in anger before reaching into his pocket. Pulling out two bottles of medicine, he tossed them to Sawyer.
"You'll need these." He said. Confused, Sawyer stared at the medicine before it hit him what Jack was doing.
"How long you gonna be gone?" Sawyer asked, rolling the medicine in his hands.
"I don't know." He answered honestly. And with that he turned to walk away before Sawyer's voice stopped him.
"You gonna tell her?" He asked. Jack sighed. He knew she would be upset, but she would understand. After all, she was always on the run.
"I'm not good at saying goodbye." He said, thinking about her words to him just a few weeks ago. And with that, Jack disappeared into the night.
"Has anyone seen Jack?" Claire asked worriedly. Kate looked at the terrified mother and tried to calm her down.
"I haven't seen him. Why?" She asked calmly.
"I had some questions about the baby and no one has seen him." She said, nervously twirling her hair.
"I'll find Jack." Kate promised. Seeing Sawyer walking up to them, she tried to hide her disgust. But he might know when Jack is so she had to talk to him.
"Have you seen Jack?" She asked, clearly wanting to get over with the conversation. She hasn't forgiven him since he conned her and the camp.
"Well, what a nice way to greet a man, Freckles.."
"HAVE YOU SEEN JACK?" She said louder, her eyes fierce and annoyed.
"Calm down. St. Jack took off last night." He bit out, angry now as well. She froze, the anger erasing from her face and being replaced with worry.
"What did you say?" And Sawyer flashed back to when Jack was trapped in the cave-in, the whole conversation seemed like that one. The way she dropped everything from her mind to concentrate on the great doctor.
"Got tired of leading, decided to take a break." Sawyer said and walked away, popping a medicine. Watching this and seeeing the medicine, Kate realized for once, he was telling the truth.
He walked through the jungle. He knew the way he was going. Some may think he was going after Michael, a part of him still was going to look for Michael but another part was looking for himself.
He knew he should have said good-bye. If something happened to him, he knew she wouldn't forgive him or herself. But he had to do this.
"You can't go by yourself!" Claire protested and Kate stuffed things into a backpack.
"He's going to get himself killed out there." She said, half-worried and half-angry at him.
"I'm going with you." Claire said, suddenly sounding bold.
"Claire, you can't leave Aaron. You know that."
"I'll leave him with Sun. You're not going alone." Claire said firmly. Kate sighed, knowing she wasn't going to wear Claire down nor did she have the time to.
"Fine. Get your stuff, we have to go."
The two were walking in silence for a good half hour before either one of them spoke.
"You care a lot for him." She stated in a matter-of-fact tone. Kate didn't answer and continued walking, almost as if trying to ignore her.
"Do you even know where we're going?" Claire asked again, almost sounding annoyed.
"No, I don't." She said, ignoring the impatience in Claire's tone. Claire, who had been walking behind her, ran a little to catch up with her.
"You didn't answer my first question." She said. Kate ignored her once again.
"If you thought we were going to go on this adventure type thing without doing the whole girl talk thing, you're crazy." Claire said, trying to joke with her. Annoyed, Kate stopped and looked at her.
"Look, Claire, it was nice of you to come with but I don't do the girl talk thing, especially in this situation. We need to find Jack. That's all that matters." She bit at her. Claire grinned at her.
"What?" Kate asked, sighing.
"You do care about him." Claire laughed, giddiness in her tone. Kate tried to bite back a smile but looking at Claire's joyous face caused her to crack up.
"We kissed." She said, in between laughs. Claire stopped, her blues eyes filled with shock.
"Oh my god. Really? How was it? He looks like a soulful kisser!" She said, grabbing onto Kate's arm. Kate became serious, hesitating. She had planned on keeping to herself but she couldn't say no to the giddy little face bouncing up and down next to her.
"It was amazing." She admitted, feeling too girly for her taste. Next thing she knew, she might as well put her hair in pigtails and wear head-to-toe pink.
"What happened after?" Claire pried.
"I ran." She whispered softly before repeating it again. The look of happiness once on Claire's face immediatly faded away and Kate turned away because she knew the look in Claire's eyes. The look of sorrow mixed with pity.
"I ran." She whispered again softly.
He heard the voices. He heard them. Spinning around in circles, he tried to figure out where they were coming from.
"The left. I'm going to find you." He whispered and ran through the jungles before stumbling upon her.
"Sarah? I don't understand." He whispered, torn. What the hell..she left him. He didn't understand this. And with that, she turned and walked away. Just like his dad did. Just like Kate did.
He grew tired, feeling ill. He couldn't do this anymore. The burden. The weight of the world. It was too much. He fell to his kness, attempting to keep himself up but the world around him faded to black.
"What if we don't find them?" Kate asked. It was going to be dark soon and she hadn't even picked up a trail. What if she was going the wrong way? What if he was dead? What if the others happened?
She shouldn't have ran. She should have stayed with him and kissed him again. But she couldn't help it. Her fear controlled her.
"We will." Claire said firmly as if reading her thoughts. Kate looked at her, pain in her eyes.
"He won't forgive me. I hurt him too bad." She said softly.
"Kate, I doubt that. It's you. The two of you have had this connection since the plane crash. Neither of you will really be over one another. You'll always go back to one another." She said comfortingly.Kate looked away.
"I keep running." She said, half to Claire and half to herself. Claire grew silent and reached to her.
" This is going to sound corny but maybe instead of running from him, you should run to him. Look at how many people we lost already. Could you forgive yourself if you lost him without him knowing how you feel?" She said. Kate studied her, thinking about her offer. Maybe she should try it..Maybe..
It began to rain as if on cue, something it does a lot on this island when something bad is about to happen. And Kate couldn't help but feel sick by the rain but she knew what she had to do - she had to keep going. It was still light out so they were able to see. And she realized why she was starting to feel sick.
He was on the ground, face-first in the mud.
"Jack!" She ran over to him, forgetting that she was with Claire and rolled him over so his face wasn't buried in the ground.
"No, no, no. Jack, wake up. Please wake up." She said frantically, the tears falling down her face.
"He has a pulse." Claire announced. Kate smiled in relief and grabbed his face in her hands.
"Jack, wake up. Wake up now." She pleaded. She saw his eyes start to flutter open and he looked startled to see her.
"Kate?" He whispered incredously.
"Don't move. We don't know what happened to you." She instructed, putting her arm around his back to keep him up.
"I saw her." He whispered, still in shock.
"Saw who?"
"Sarah." He whispered before closing his eyes again. Kate stared in shock. Sarah? Who was that?
They were a mile from camp when they saw Sayid who ran to them. The two tiny girls struggling to carry a heavy guy was quite a sight.
"I got him." Sayid said, putting his arm around Jack and putting him in the tent. Exhausted, Kate plopped herself next to him. Before she knew it, she fell asleep.
She began to wake up slowly when she heard his voice.
"So we're sharing a tent now?" He was joking as he was still laying next to her. She smiled sheepishly.
"I was tired." She said softly.
"I can imagine. I'm no Charlie." He said, still smiling. Kate laughed and looked down.
"Who was she, Jack?" She asked. Confused, he didn't know how to respond.
"Sarah."
Any smile on his face fell at the mention of her name and he rolled onto his back.
"How did you-"
"You said you saw her in the jungle."
"She was my wife...She left me. She ran from me." He said, the loneliness evident in his voice. He didn't know what compelled him to tell her this. Guilt overcoming her, she sat up.
"Jack..."
"Let me finish. You ran Kate. Again. But this time you ran to him. And something inside of me snapped. I just hated it." He said bitterly.
"You were jealous." She said, slightly happy at this fact. Hearing the happiness in her voice, he stared at her.
"You're kidding. You enjoy that I was jealous?" He asked incredously.
"Well..yeah." She said sheepishly.
"I'm tired of the running, Kate." He said in a serious tone.
"Jack..I just can't stop running." She replied and she knew that comment hurt him.
"But I can try to. It just won't be easy."
"Oh because everything with you has been?" He said, smiling. Kate laughed, still feeling a tad insecure about their situation.
"You have to promise me something as well." Kate said sternly.
"Okay."
"No more of this taking off on your own. I can't lose you, Jack." She whispered softly. He looked down and took her hand.
"No more." He said, meeting her eyes. And he stood up, pulling her with him.
"What are you doing?" She asked bewildered.
"Taking it slow." He said, a boyish grin on his face and the two began to walk, hand-in-hand.
THE END.