Wow! I don't think I have ever received so many reviews in one chapter. You guys are all great. Thanks so much.

Disclaimer: if I owned it, Addison would be back on her pretty little way to NYC

I walk up to my room in an almost drunk fashion. My eyelids are droopy and my body feels about ready to collapse. I somehow manage to find my bed and rest my head on the oh-so soft, oh-so cushiony pillow, and pull my knees to my chest.

But as tired, and as almost-brain dead as I am as a result of a 48 hour shift, I find myself having trouble falling asleep. Does that ever happen to anyone? Are you ever simply so tired that even when you are lying down with your eyes closed, you can't seem to fall asleep?

Well, it happens to me. Like now for instance. All I can think of is my baby. My baby boy. Dr. Grant asked me to take some time to consider my options, but I know what I'm doing. I'm keeping it. He's mine.

And from what I've figured out, he's also McDreamy's. It hasn't yet struck me how Derek will react when he finds out the news. If he finds out the news. All I can think of is the beautiful little baby, or fetus-almost-baby, growing inside of me. It's funny. I am a doctor, I am a surgeon, I spent seven years in the top medical school on the east coast, and after all I have experienced, nothing could have prepared me for this feeling. I have created life. And although I am being very un-Meredithy right now, I really can't help it, and I really don't care. Maybe it's the hormones, or maybe I'm just excited.

I find myself lying in bed, thinking about why my baby will look like. He will have Derek's hair and smile, his beautiful smile. He will have my eyes. Derek once told me that they remind him of fire. I never really understood that, considering the fact that my eyes are pale to the extent of being grey, kind of like my last name, huh, that's interesting. Derek laughed when I didn't understand.

"Derek, my eyes are blue, grey even. They are not anything special, they are plain, ordinary eyes."

Derek shook his head, brushing back a piece of my honey blonde hair and sighing deeply, looking at me as if we were the only ones on the planet, which of course, is not humanely possible, but even still, it felt that way. "You're eyes remind me of fire, because of the glint you get in them when your lying. They remind me of fire when I see the fury beneath them when you're angry or upset. I see fire shining when you smile, when you get that tiny sparkle, that tiny twinkle that makes me want to rip of your clothes." He gave me one of his heart melting, I-want-sex-now smiles "You're eyes remind me of fire, Meredith."

Thinking of the moment so long ago still sends shivers up my spine and through my body. And then I go back to daydreaming about the little person currently growing inside of me, and then back to fantasizing about Derek. It really is a cycle.

I am just closing my eyes to remember the day when Derek first told me he loved me, when Izzie so rudely enters my room.

"Hey Mere! Christina tells me you're pregnant." Izzie smiles widely and pauses before speaking again. "Who's the father? I mean is it McDreamy? But you haven't been with him for a while now. Oh is it that cute college guy from Joe's? He was adorable Mer, I hope it's him. Oh and how are you doing with everything? Have you gone to the doctor yet? Mere—"

"Izzie!" I say, cutting her off before she manages to set the world record for rambling. "I don't know what you are talking about."

Okay, I lied. Christina obviously figured it out and obviously told Izzie who was obviously beyond excited.

"But," Izzie looks confused. "The baby, you. You're having a baby… right?"

I shake my head slowly.

"But Christina… Christina said—"

"Izzie," I say calmly, "Do I look pregnant?"

Izzie looks at me and thinks for a moment, as if she's trying to figure out how to answer me politely. "Well, I mean, a little bit, kind of, yeah."

I sigh. I'll be showing even more soon so I may as well tell my best friend since my other best friend obviously knows and my other, other best friend will soon know as well.

"Fine," I mumble, "You caught me. I'm pregnant with McDreamy's baby, three months and a few weeks along. I'm having a boy, and Derek has no idea, nor does anyone else," I say, and then add, "And I would like to keep it that way Izz."

Izzie looks at me for a moment and smiles. "It's okay Mer, I've done this before, and it really isn't that bad."

I don't even bother to ask what Izzie was talking about or how she knows what exactly she has done. I just nod and let the tears that have been threatening to fall for days, let loose.

"I'm nervous Izz. I'm nervous and I'm excited and I don't know what to do. McDreamy doesn't know, and I don't think I want him, back just because of this baby. I-I, I don't want to have to leave the intern program, and I know absolutely nothing about b-babies." My tears slowly turn into sobs as Izzie hugs me warmly.

It's strange. I am not known for being a crier. In fact, I am usually one of those, "hold it in until you can't anymore," types. I've pretty much known that I was pregnant for over a month now. But, being me, I've chosen to deny it, and have left myself to deal with the consequences now.

"Hey, hey Mer," Izzie says, pulling back and smiling at me. "Let's think of names."

And so with my eyes dry and Izzie's arm around me in a best-friend sort of way, together, we think of names.

Okay, actually, tonight's episode almost made me cry. Poor George… I love Mer but I can't believe she did that to him. Anyone else feeling a huge bout of sympathy for Georgie?