Xavier explained to me that it had been Magneto- or as he called him, Eric- who had lifted me from the tank in the lab; it had been Eric who removed the adamantium from my body. Xavier said that Eric had recognized my desperate need for medical attention, and the day after the flooding of Alkali, he'd brought me to the mutant school.

"Why? I don't understand it, why would Magneto help me? He thinks I'm a traitor, he knows that I'd been helping William all along for years." I said, leaning forward slightly in the chair before his polished oak desk.

"No, Yuriko, Eric had been subjected to Stryker's drugs himself, and he can understand, as well as Kurt and Scott, that you were powerless to stop what happened."

Xavier's words went a long way in comforting me, but I felt that I was treading water in a sea of uncertainty. Logan had killed me, Magneto had saved me, Xavier had sheltered me, Ororo had befriended me…

I felt confused, lost and tired of living off of Xavier's charity. I'd been free for quite some time already, but I hadn't done anything even remotely productive. Paranoia seeped into my mind- everyone at the school probably thought that I was lazy and had nothing to offer to earn my keep.

I wanted to talk to someone, but there was no one to talk to- no one who could understand my feelings. I looked up to Xavier again, and I could see the sympathy in his soft brown eyes. I didn't know who or what I was anymore- a mutant? A killer? Yuriko? Lady Deathstryke?

I stood from the chair and left Xavier's office. He didn't try to stop me; he seemed to understand that I wanted a little time alone to think. The grounds of the school are beautiful- there is a large pond in the center of several flower gardens, and there are majestic trees lining the edges of the property. I didn't want to languish in the gardens where anyone could see me, so I cut across and headed straight for the trunk of the nearest tall tree.

It had been a while since I'd last used my talons, but I extended them now, and felt the thrill in my blood. Over the years, I'd rarely used my claws for a reason other than causing some kind of destruction; the thrill I felt was my mind associating my claws with dangers and excitement.

No, I'm not hurting anyone now, I just want to get away from it all for a little while…

I dug my talons into the bark of the tree and climbed. I didn't go all the way up to the top branches, in fact I stopped about 30 feet above the ground. I had a good view of the school and gardens, and if I turned the other way I could see the sun setting.

"Been up there long?"

I turned so fast that I nearly lost my balance on the branch. Looking down, I saw Logan standing at the base of the tree. A faint whiff of cigar smoke and leather caught my attention, but I didn't know what to say. By now Logan knew everything that had happened to me, and I'm sure that he realized William had meant for him to be in my place all along.

Logan was meant to be the assassin at command, but perhaps it had always been in William's plans to have me at his side in one way or another. I didn't want to think about it.

"I just wanted a little time-"

"I know what you wanted, but I know from experience that if you take too much time alone, it'll drive you crazy. Penny for your thoughts?"

I stared down at him, but I didn't climb down the tree. I didn't know what I should do, but Logan made the decision for me. "If you don't want to come down and talk to me, I'll just climb up there and keep you some company."

Logan tossed the cigar aside and released his claws. I remembered the feel of his claws slicing into my stomach, and when I saw the grimace on his face I felt a pang of sorrow for him that his claws should hurt him so much. He wasted no time in climbing the tree and trapping me on my branch.

"So, say something."

"What do you want me to say? I'm sorry that I assisted William and my father in designing your claws? I'm sorry for having nothing to offer the school?"

I thought he would be angry once he heard me admit to being on the design team, but he didn't bat an eye. "Hey, if we're going to start apologizing for things we couldn't have helped, then I think I should go first. I'm sorry I woke up and attacked all the lab guys, I'm sorry I ran and that Stryker had to use you instead. I'm sorry for almost killing you back at Alkali, and for being a little less than friendly when you woke up here."

I felt the salty sting of tears in the corner of my eyes. "Why are you doing this, Logan? Why are you being so nice to me after all that I've done?"

"Because nothing you did was any of your fault. We both know that you had no control over the years, and I know for a fact that you wouldn't willingly go along with all that happened."

"I didn't want to do anything he made me do…but that's in the past now, and I don't know what to do with myself now that I'm free. I can't go on living here with nothing to do, I don't feel whole…I'm sorry, I know it doesn't make any sense."

Logan shook his head. "No, it makes a little sense. Imagine feeling that way for over 10 years- lost, with nothing and no one to keep you grounded. I can't believe I have to make this speech again…"

"What do you mean?"

"You know that girl, Rogue? She felt like she didn't belong here, either. She got all the way to the train station and was more than ready to just disappear. I caught up with her and somehow managed to convince her to stay. Anyway, I think Xavier knew how you were feeling and he sent me out here."

"Xavier sent you? Why?"

"Well, he had a hunch that you were feeling kind of useless, and he's been working on a special kind of project for you. Scott, he's…well, he's taken some time off, and the students could use a new training teacher. Teach them how to fight, just in case the school is ever attacked again and they might have to fight- only as a last resort, or so Xavier says."

"He wants me to stay here, and be a teacher?" I felt a new joy swell in my chest, almost overwhelming me with its passion.

"Yeah, and there's something else. When the time comes, there's a suit waiting for you in your room."

"He wants me to be one of the X-men?"

Logan shrugged and looked away. "Well, there is an opening," he seemed sad for a moment, but then he looked back at me and smiled for the first time that day. "Besides, if that fight in the lab was any indication, I don't think that we could've chosen a better girl for the job."

I nearly cried with joy when Logan led me to my bedroom and I laid eyes on my own X suit. I was to be a teacher, a warrior for mutants to repair the damage I'd been forced to inflict, I was accepted, I finally felt that I had somewhere to belong…

My name is Yuriko Oyama, and sometimes Lady Deathstryke- and I am finally free.