Hi all!
A quick note to let you know this chapter is RATED M! This ended up being a very mature chapter, if you think you might be offended, please don't read!
Thank you,
Failte
It was after two in the morning before Tonks returned to her flat. She did what she could to help sort out what had happened, getting help to the injured, and helping to secure the perimeter of the school.
After leaving the hospital, she hadn't seen Remus again that night. She didn't know where he had gone or what he was doing. Her nerves were raw with worry. Was he angry with her? Had she embarrassed and upset him? Would he ever talk to her again?
She sighed as she opened the door to the building that housed her flat. Starting up the stairs to her third floor home, she decided to stop worrying about it. She had acted impulsively, but she said what she needed to say and would not regret it. Everything was totally out in the open now and if he regretted it or was embarrassed, that was his problem.
Tonks stopped short, her heart in her throat as she approached her door. There, sitting on the floor, his knees bent and his forehead resting on them, was Remus. He didn't look up when she stopped in front of him and so Tonks lowered herself down to sit beside him.
For several long moments, neither one of them spoke. They didn't touch, they didn't acknowledge each other.
Finally, Remus lifted his head and looked at her with red eyes. No words were needed as they fell into each other's arms. It was then that Tonks allowed the tears to fall. Wrapped tightly in his embrace, her face pressed to his shoulder, she sobbed quietly. Remus didn't say anything, he didn't need to. He simply stroked her back and held her.
When the tears stopped and she trusted her legs to be strong enough to hold her, Tonks released him and rose to her feet. She unlocked and opened her door, stepping aside to allow him entrance. She slid her robe off and turned to ask him if he would like some tea. But the words never left her as he took her face in his hands and kissed her so gently, so longingly, she felt her knees weaken and the robe slipped from her hands to land in a pile on the floor.
"I'm sorry," he whispered hoarsely when he broke the kiss, still holding her face in his hands. "I'm sorry for worrying you, for hurting you, for…everything."
She nodded slowly, unable to find her voice.
"I—I've been an old fool, I've been pushing away what I need the most. I do need you, Nymphadora, I shouldn't, it's irresponsible of me, I have no right to ask you to join me in this life of mine, but I do. I can't stop thinking about you or worrying about you. When…when everything was over tonight, I could only think of you and my need to be with you, I sat outside your front door for over two hours waiting for you. I—I feel like I've been waiting my entire life for you."
She pulled away from him, swiping at her wet eyes with the back of her hand. "Don't call me Nymphadora."
"Tonks."
"What…what changed your mind?"
"I've lost so many people, I didn't want to lose you. I realized how close I was to that."
"What if I said it was too late?"
"I wouldn't listen to you."
The corner of her mouth quirked up as she lifted her eyes to his. "I thought you'd hate me for what I said earlier."
"I could never hate you."
"But I embarrassed you."
"Yes. But it was the kick in the arse I needed."
Tonks slid her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. When he slipped his arms around her waist, she whispered. "Will you let me love you?"
After a moment's hesitation, Remus nodded.
She stepped back and studied him a moment. He looked broken and worn. Lifting her hand, she gently brushed aside the hair that fell over his forehead and stroked her hand down his cheek. Her heart swelled, she honestly didn't think it was possible to love someone as much as she loved Remus Lupin.
Tonks took his hand and led him down the hall to her bedroom. Neither of them spoke as she unclipped his robes and pushed them off his shoulders. Beneath he wore a short sleeved shirt that had once been white, but was now graying with age. His brown slacks were patched and the cuffs were beginning to fray above his ancient loafers.
Her need to touch him was overwhelming as she ran her hands up and down his bare arms and over his chest as she stood on her toes and kissed him.
Remus' touch was hesitant as he ran his hands over her back. When Tonks pulled his shirt out of the waistband of his pants, he slid his hands under the Puddlemere United shirt she wore. Her skin was cool and soft beneath his hands.
His touch was driving her insane. She took his hands and led him around the clutter to the bed. When he tried to touch her, she gently pushed his hands away.
"Just…just let me touch you," she said quietly, undoing the buttons of his shirt.
At a loss as to what to do, Remus stood awkwardly, fisting his hands at his sides.
Tonks pushed the shirt off his shoulders and there was an uncomfortable moment where they wrestled to get it off him.
Remus had to fight hard to not cover himself as he fidgeted under her gaze. His torso was thin, his ribs visible, and scars, some old, some new, crossed his body. He felt exposed and vulnerable.
"You're beautiful," she whispered, running her hands over his body.
Her words only made him feel more uncomfortable and he raised his arms to cover himself.
Tonks grabbed his arms and held them down as she pressed gentle kisses to his skin. It was warm and soft beneath her lips. He tasted earthy and salty, his scent was that of man and beast. She felt him tremble and only wanted to soothe him, but her own needs were beginning to overwhelm her. She needed more of him.
He let his head fall back as she kissed her way up his chest to his throat, leaving a trail of fire over his skin. "Release me," he growled.
She dropped his arms and slid her hands over his stomach and chest as he gripped the hem of her shirt, surprising her as he yanked it sharply up over her head. He tossed it aside and pulled her tightly against him. Fisting his hand in her hair, he tilted her head back and pressed his lips to hers. His other hand slid up her back and fumbled with the clasp of her bra. Feeling impatient, he gave it a hard yank, tearing it apart.
Tonks gasped, surprised at his behavior.
"Did I hurt you?" He murmured against her lips.
"No."
He grunted and dipped his head, capturing a nipple between his lips.
She groaned quietly and wove her fingers into his hair, holding him to her.
His nervousness seemed to disappear as he explored her body. He fell to his knees as his lips moved from her breast down her stomach and the waistband of her jeans. Her knees weakened as he stroked her over her jeans. She gripped his shoulders, trying to keep her balance.
He unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans, pushing them down her legs. She lost her balance and fell back onto the bed. Remus chuckled as he grabbed her legs to still her.
"Allow me," he teased.
Pulling off her boots, he tossed them aside, followed quickly by her jeans. He climbed up on top of her, stretching his body over hers, relishing in the feel of her hot flesh pressed against his own. She hooked her leg around his waist, grinding her hips against him, feeling his erection grow against the constraints of his slacks.
She ran her hands up and down his back as he kissed his way up her throat to her mouth. Her lips parted and their tongues met. A growl came from deep within him as she continued to move against him. He slid his hand between them and rubbed it over her knickers, feeling them dampen. She arched against him, throwing her head back as he slipped a finger inside her. He lifted his head and watched as she closed her eyes and writhed beneath him.
She cried out his name as she rose up and over the crest.
Remus couldn't help but smile as she went limp beneath him.
She slowly opened her eyes and looked up at him. "You look like the cat who ate the canary."
"You're so beautiful."
Tonks startled Remus with her strength as she rolled him off her. "Oh, we're just getting started, darling."
He groaned and his hips arched as she stroked him gently through the material of his slacks. "Oh, Merlin, Tonks, you're killing me."
She unhooked and unzipped his pants, torturing him with her slow movements.
"I want you inside me," she whispered, running her tongue along his jaw.
Unable to speak, he jerked upward into her hand as she stroked him.
"I love you, so much."
Remus groaned and closed his eyes.
"Do you want me?"
"More than you could ever know," he groaned.
"Tell me," she murmured, wiggling out of her knickers, rubbing her body against his.
"I want you more than I need to take my next breath."
She gripped the waistband of his underwear. "There's no going back, Remus."
"I don't want to. Ever."
His underwear joined hers on the floor.
She kissed him hard before whispering against his lips. "Make love to me."
Remus rolled her over underneath him. She spread her legs so he was nestled between them. With his face pressed into her throat, he entered her.
They both froze, stunned by the sensations and emotions that filled them. Remus lifted his head and looked down at her. She nodded, a tear rolled from her eye.
"Are you hurt?" He asked, his voice strangled.
"No, not hurt…I don't know what, but it's…it's wonderful."
He leaned down, capturing her lips with his own as he began to slowly move his hips. It had been so long since he had been with a woman, a women he cared so much for. A woman he wanted and needed.
He forced himself to go slowly, he wanted her to enjoy this as much as he did. Sliding his hand between them, down her stomach, damp with sweat, he found the small bundle of nerves at the top of her folds. She gasped and arched up against him, crying his name as she came a second time.
Remus froze, trying to rein himself in, not wanting it to end too quickly.
Tonks wrapped her arms and legs around him, rolling across the bed and reversing their positions. She smiled down at him. "Your turn."
She sat up, riding him with a vengeance. Remus closed his eyes, trying to keep up with her, but afraid it would kill him if he tried. He opened his eyes again when she took his hands and placed them on her breasts. He tried to be gentle, massaging.
"I won't break," she assured him, leaning forward to kiss him.
He groaned loudly, meeting her thrust for thrust, his hands raced over her, touching as much of her as he could. He knew he was being rough, he knew he was bruising her, but judging by her reaction, she didn't seem to mind at all.
Tonks braced herself over him, placing a hand on either side of his head and grinding herself against him.
Remus gripped her waist tightly and thrust up, emptying himself inside her. She shuddered and collapsed on top of him.
It was an amazing feeling, he realized. Lying in bed with the most amazing woman he had ever known, covered in a fine sheen of sweat, enjoying the incredible afterglow of having made love with someone he truly cared for.
"I stand corrected," she murmured against his skin. "I think you did break me."
He smiled and lifted her arm, watching it fall again, limp. "Is that really a bad thing?"
"Nope, not at all. Actually, I'm hoping you'll break me at least a million more times."
He turned his head to press a kiss to the top of hers. "Tonks."
"Hm?"
"You're hair."
"Hm?"
"It's pink."
She lifted her head and looked at him. "What?"
He touched the shoulder length hair. "It's pink."
Tonks disentangled herself from him and crossed to the mirror above her bureau. "It is!"
If Remus wasn't so exhausted, the sight of her tight, naked body would have had him tackling her back onto the bed. As it was, he just enjoyed the sight in front of him, allowing his mind to wander about how it would feel to slowly explore and taste every inch of her.
Tonks squeezed up her face and her hair turned a dark green and fell to her waist. A moment later it was shoulder length, curly and red. Her nose changed from long and straight to short and upturned to pig like. She giggled as she tested her abilities, thrilled to have them back. With her hair short, spiked and pink, her eyes large and lavender, she turned and jumped on the bed, kissing him with gusto.
"I'm me again!"
He grinned at her. "Yes, you are."
She cuddled down next to him, her head on his shoulder and her arm thrown across his chest.
Remus pulled the quilt up over them and wrapped his arms tightly around her. "Can I ask you something?"
"Mm hm."
"Was it the, uh, the sex that brought your metamorphmagizing abilities back?"
She lifted her head and smiled. "It was good, but not that good. But…"
"But what?"
Color rose to her cheeks as she adverted her gaze from his, embarrassed. "Well, you see, I've, uh…in the past, while, um, while in the throes of passion…"
Remus chuckled.
"Sometimes, I can't control the changes."
"Hm, so you're saying moments of heightened sexual excitement can lead to your image changing?"
"Always the professor, huh?" She asked, laying her head on his shoulder. "No, it doesn't change my appearance completely, but it has caused my hair to change before. I think my abilities came back when you came to me, when you told me how you felt. It wasn't the sex, although that helped, I think it comes from knowing you're mine."
"I'm yours?"
"As much as I'm yours."
She's mine. The idea warmed him and he kissed the top of her head. "I never knew that about metamorphmagizing."
"How much do you know about it?"
"I've read a thing or two since I met someone."
"Really? 'Cause I've been reading a few things about werewolves. I wonder if there's a correlation."
"I wonder," he murmured, stroking her back.
……………………………………………………………
The sun was streaming through the window when Tonks opened her eyes. She felt a bit sore and bruised, but fulfilled and happy. Then the memories of all that had happened the night before crashed down upon her, the battle, Dumbledore. With a heavy heart, she rolled over and found an empty bed.
She lifted her head and looked around the room. There was no sign of Remus at all. Pain and anger coursed through her. It seemed as though every time she needed him, he disappeared.
"So you're just walking out again?" She grumbled angrily, pushing back the quilt. "Are you that big a of coward, Remus Lupin? Or are you that big of a jerk?" She picked up her bathrobe that had been tossed over a chair.
Tears welled up in her eyes and she felt like a colossal fool for allowing him to waltz in here and take advantage of her after a horrible night. She hadn't been thinking straight, her emotions had been all churned up and she had just fallen into his arms like some helpless damsel in distress. Well, never again! She was done playing these games with him!
Entering her living room, she stopped short, surprised to see him sitting at the dining table, his head bent over a piece of parchment, quill scratching.
She crossed her arms over her chest and fought to keep her bottom lip from trembling. "At least you have the courtesy to write a note before slinking off."
He raised his head. "Excuse me?"
"Did you think you could just sneak out this morning and I wouldn't say anything? After what we…what we shared last night, you were just going to leave and not say anything? What kind of heartless, self-absorbed prat are you?"
Remus furrowed his brow in confusion. "What are you talking about?"
Tonks stomped across the room, stumbling a bit over an upturned edge of her throw rug. "I'm talking about you leaving."
"I'm right here."
She snatched the parchment off the table. "Writing a 'Dear Jane' letter to blow me off? Going to waltz out of my life again?"
"It isn't what you think," he said, his voice lowering, warningly.
Feeling angry and frustrated, as well as relieved that he was still there, Tonks felt like a keg of emotions that were ready to explode. Her hand shook slightly as she looked down at the parchment. Tears welled up again in her eyes as she read it and felt like an even bigger fool.
Dear Tabitha,
It is with deep regret that I must inform you of the passing of your sister, Selena. I know this must come as a shock to you, as it did to me. I considered your sister a good friend and I hope you will find comfort in knowing that she did have friends and people who cared for her. I hope to someday be able to tell you more about what happened, but am unable to right now, just know that she passed fighting the good fight and died a hero.
I think she would like you to know that she loved her nieces and nephew, even though they had never met, and I hope you'll find it in your heart to tell them about their aunt and what a kind, good person she was, despite the lifestyle she was forced to live.
Yours Truly,
Remus J. Lupin
Tonks laid a hand on his shoulder as guilt washed over her. "I'm sorry."
"I felt it my duty to contact her family," he murmured.
"Oh, Remus."
"Then I was going to surprise you with breakfast in bed."
"I didn't know she had died."
"I saw another werewolf last night, he told me. I went back to the commune and…and found her."
Tonks set the letter back on the table and slid her arms around his neck, resting her cheek on top of his head. "I am so sorry, Remus. I…I didn't know. I woke up and you were gone, I guess I just thought the worst."
He patted her arm and then removed her arms from around his neck, standing to face her. "I won't pretend that it didn't hurt that you thought that of me, but I deserved it. I have given you no reason to trust me or to believe that I won't leave you."
"Well, you don't exactly have a good track record."
"I meant it when I told you that I never wanted to hurt you," he told her, quietly. "I will do whatever I need to to gain your trust."
"Don't leave me," she said simply.
"I won't."
"I want to believe, really I do, but…"
He nodded slowly.
She swiped the sleeve of her bathrobe over her eyes. "Damnit, Remus! I don't know what to think! We had an incredible night and falling asleep in your arms was…was all I ever wanted. Then I woke up and you were gone. How many more times are you going to leave me?"
He stepped closer, taking her hands in his. "Tonks, you are the most important person in the world to me, you have been for a long time. I can't stop thinking of you, how much you mean to me. I know I've been a…a heartless, self-absorbed prat, but I'll make it up to you, I promise. I can only ask that you give me the chance to prove myself, to allow my actions to speak for me." He cupped her chin in his hand and lifted her face to his. "I didn't really leave this morning, did I?"
She shook her head, biting her lip to keep it from trembling.
"I swear to you that I will do everything in my power to prove myself to you, even if it takes the rest of my life."
Tonks pulled herself free of him and, after a second's hesitation, slipped her arms around him, pulling him close. "Were you really going to make me breakfast in bed?" She asked, her voice shaking.
He hugged her to him. "Yes I was."
"I really am sorry about Selena."
"So am I."
She rubbed her face against the front of his shirt, mumbling something into his chest.
"What was that?"
She tilted her head back to look at him. "I'm glad you were here when I got home last night, I didn't want to be alone."
He leaned down and rested his forehead against hers. "I didn't want to be alone either, Nymphadora."
Tonks wrinkled her nose. "Don't call me that."
Remus thought a moment, he didn't like calling her Tonks, it just didn't seem intimate enough. "Nymph?"
She shook her head. "Sirius was the only one who ever called me that."
"Dora?"
She opened her mouth to disagree then snapped it shut. Lifting her head, she tilted it to the side and studied him. "Say that again."
"Dora." He kissed her gently. "My Dora."
"I like that."
"I like you."
Rising up on her toes, Tonks pressed her lips to his. "Will you stay with me?"
Remus hesitated a moment, contemplating his response. He wanted to be with her, but he was afraid that they were moving too quickly.
They both jumped when they heard a tapping noise. Whirling around, she saw an owl sitting on the window ledge, tapping on the glass with its beak.
"I'll get it," Remus said, crossing the room to open the window.
The owl flew in and landed on the table, holding its leg out to Remus. Before he could shut the window, another owl flew in and landing near the first, holding its leg out to Tonks.
She untied the parchment and unrolled it while he did the same. Tonks looked over his shoulder and saw that his was the exact same short note.
Professor Dumbledore will be laid to rest on the grounds of Hogwarts in two days time. I wanted you all to know before it was printed in the Prophet.
Minerva
"She must have sent these to all the members of the Order," said Remus quietly.
"I wonder if there is anything we can do."
Remus felt a strange flutter at her casual use of the pronoun 'we'. "Maybe we can go to Hogwarts this afternoon and ask. I'd like to see Harry as well."
She nodded, folding the parchment and shoving it in to the pocket of her robe. "I'm going to go get dressed."
"I'll put water on for tea."
Tonks stopped at the hallway and turned to him. "Remus?"
He shut the window behind the two owls. "Yes?"
"You didn't answer my question."
"What?"
"Will you stay?"
He rubbed the back of his neck. "For now."
"What does that mean?"
"That means that I would love to stay with you, but we're at war and I may be needed somewhere. I am still working for the Order, if they need me to go somewhere, I will."
"Oh." Tonks toyed with the tie of her robe and looked at the floor.
He crossed to her, taking her by the shoulders. "But I do want to be with you and I promise you that if I need to go somewhere, I will come back."
She nodded.
"I promise."
"The commune isn't safe any more," she said quietly. "Both Randolph and Selena were killed there. I don't want you going back."
He bit his lip and looked down into her worried, young face. "We'll take it one day at a time, Dora. I'm not going back to the commune, at least not now. But I need to do my job, just like you do. And I can't be here at the full moon." He held up his hand to stop her from arguing. "That is not up for discussion. I have places to go and I will go there. But, for now, I want to be with you, I want to spend time with you, get to know you better."
"So you'll stay?"
Remus nodded.
"Good." She turned and walked down the hall toward the bathroom, calling out over her shoulder. "I haven't had a good meal since I left Grimmuald Place."
He stood rooted to the spot for a moment, caught off guard by her comment. "Glad I can be of some use."
"So am I," she replied, snapping the door shut behind her.
Remus shook his head and smiled as he turned to the kitchen. What have I gotten myself in to?
Continued in "Unlikely Soulmates"...
AN: Thank you all so much for your amazing reviews and support and for reading my story. I loved writing this because they are such amazing characters (Thank you J.K. Rowling!) I'm not sure where my muse will take me next, if I'll write another HP story or something else, we'll just have to wait and see.
Thank you all for everything!