Save Yourself

"I don't know what we did wrong," complained George as his potion blew up in his face. Again.

Fred and George were stuck at Number 12 Grimmauld Place for the summer. They decided that the place needed to be lightened up a bit. So they took advantage of the fact that Mrs. Weasley, Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Hermione were all off shopping to work on a potion to 'liven up' the dreary atmosphere.

"I don't know either, maybe less beetle juice?" suggested Fred.

"Nope, already tried that, remember the holes burnt in my shoes?"

"Oh yeah, how about more bat wings?"

"Maybe. but if we did that you'd have to add lizard liver to balance it out."

They pondered silently for a minute or two.

"What're you trying to make ?" Professor Lupin had just walked into the kitchen and was met with the sight of his two former students completely baffled. He had hardly ever seen them like that.

"Well, we're trying," said Fred

"And he means TRYING"

"Yes, TRYING, to make a potion that gives the drinker dog ears for 24 hours."

"Which should be easy, but we're trying to make sure that it has no odor, taste, or color to it."

Sirius stuck his head in to the room. "Well, Remus here knows all about how to do that one." Said the man, shooting Lupin a rather nasty glare.

"Yep, sure do, only I got it to last for a week," Lupin smirked at Sirius. Theychuckled a bitat the memory.

"So, do you boys want to take a break? I can make some tea and me and Sirius can tell you where you went wrong," Lupin asked.

The boys smiled gratefully.

"That sounds great Professor."

"Thank you, sir"

"You do realize that im not you're teacher don't you?"

"Meh, old habits die hard."

Remus smiled back at the boys and got up to make the tea. Sirius just plopped himself down in a chair.

"Are you sure you want to do dog ears?' he asked thoughtfully "'Cause me and the others gave a rather nasty group of slytherins disgusting, unwashed elephant ears."

"Oh, I remember that." Said lupin. The twins looked up, shocked.

"You were a prankster professor?" asked Fred

"I thought you were a prefect" said George

"Well. . . yes I was,but I was never a very good one.."

"Oh, yes, Remy here was the baddest of the bad."

"Oh, I don't know Sirius, I seem to remember you were the one who got us caught during that prank, I think that's pretty darn bad."

Sirius grinned. "A weeks worth of detentions and Molly out to murder us, was the punishment, was it not."

"Oh, she was so mad at you Siri –," Lupin was cut off.

"BLACK, LUPIN!" Mrs. Weasley her self strode angrily in to the room.

"Yes molly dearest?" answered Sirius weakly, he knew what was coming.

"You had better not be giving my sons ideas." Her voice was dangerously low, not a good sign in the body language of Mrs. Wealsley.

"No molly"

"Never"

She didn't seem satisfied and still looked incredibly suspicious.

"Oh, we weren't that bad Molly." Said Remus indignantly. Fred and George still could not believe that kind, quiet, law abiding professor lupin was a prankster.

"You guys broke the record for most detentions at Hogwarts in your THIRD YEAR, for heavens sake"

"Well, you made sure to get on our case about it," said Sirius with a smile.

"Wait, so it's you're detention record we've been trying to beat all these years?" asked George, Fred nodding in agreement beside him.

"Yes," said Remus "I still have her speech memorized." Lupin sighed, Black laughed.

"Oh, yes Remus my friend, as do I," Sirius screwed up his face, put his hands on his hips, and gave an all around good impression of Mrs. Weasley.

"Now a head girl it is my duty to enforce the rules, and it's rather hard to do that when you 4 (Fred nudged George at the mention of 4 pranksters) keep on ripping the rules set in place for the others safety to SHREADS!"

Mrs. Weasley had a look on her face that was sort of a combination of fury, embarrassment, and annoyance. It was a very comical look. Sirius was laughing too hard at the look to continue, Lupin kindly set his features and finished for Sirius.

"So, you little miscreant creeps, instead of signing all of you're pranks with the words mischief managed, why don't you do the school, no, the world a favor and really manage you're mischief for GOOD!" Lupin crossed his arms and 'humphed'

The twin's mouths were hanging, more like gaping open. "Mischief managed" they whispered to each other, eyes bugging out.

"You could have changed the lecture once in a while, it got rather monotonous." Commented Sirius.

"And we're rather proud of that detention record thank you." added Lupin.

"Well, I meant every word I said" huffed Mrs. Weasley, "It wasn't just that you pranked, it was that you pranked and had the nerve to actually sign you work with your own names."

"We did not," said Sirius

"No, you just used those stupid random nick names, something about worms…"

"MOONY WORMTAIL PADFOOT AND PRONGS!" shouted the twins. They flung themselves to the feet of the last surviving Marauders.

"We bow before you rule breaking greatness, Marauders."

"How could we not have realized."

"Umm…yeah," said Sirius.

"How do you know that?" asked Lupin. He would soon realize that this was a very bad idea.

"You're our IDOLS!" exclaimed George from Lupin's feet. His eyes widened, Sirius winced.

"WE HAVE YOU'RE MAP!" said Fred just as loudly.

"We owe all our success to pranksters to you 4!"

"And we thought WE were good trouble makers - ,"

"We're nothing on YOU!"

"I could get used to this," said Sirius, but his enjoyment was short lived. He looked up and began to join Lupin in shaking and cowering before the mighty, strong, and angry Molly Weasley.

"You have been giving my sons ideas." She said, her voice dangerously low, not a good sign in the body language of Mrs. Weasley.

"No Molly."

"Never."

"You have, and you're old school stuff is making it's way into innocent hands, corrupting them, staining them with the desire to make trouble." Her finger wrapped themselves around a wooden spoon.

"Um, mom, they had nothing to do with that."

"Too right boys, now come on Padfoot, let's not be murdered in many creative ways." Lupin was discreetly inching towards the door.

Mrs. Weasley's free fingers found another spoon on the counter.

"Right you are Professor Moony" Sirius gave a weak chuckle and followed Lupin to the door of the kitchen. "Well, we'll be seeing you two around." And then the two surviving Marauders gave up all hopes of being discreet and ran for their middle aged lives. They were followed by a very angry and protective mother brandishing a wooden spoon in each hand. The twins could here the fight that was playing out in the stairwell.

"GO moony, GO!"

"I CANT MAKE IT PADFOOT, SAVE YOURSELF!"

They heard a thump and figured that the professor fell down.

"BUT MOONY, I CANT LEAVE YOU TO HER!"

"JUST GO!"

Mrs. Weasleys steps got farther from the twins and closer to the men on the stairs.

"RIGHT, LEAVING NOW!"

There was a short pause, the twins wondered if it was over already.

"OW! Molly is this really nessasa- OW! Ok ok ok, I get it, OW, good lord woman, RUN PADFOOT, WHILE YOU STILL CAN- OOOWWW!"

"I'LL MISS YOU MOONYKINS!"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT- ow! Mollyyyyyyyy"

"DON'T DIE, wait,… heh heh, what are you going to do with that."

The foot steps quickened

"GAH, SHE'S GOT ME, HELP, OW, AHHHHHHHH!"

The boys couldnt hear lupin anymore and wonderd what had become of him.

"Stop screaming man you sound like a woman."

"AHHHH-

"I said stop."

"AHHHHH-,"

There was a clunking noise and everything went quiet.

"… do you think they lived? Asked Fred after a minute.

"Poor guys, never stood a chance."

"What do you say brother, should we avenge their heroic deaths." George asked, while pouring some of the potion Lupin helped them with into a glass.

"I say, great idea George, HEY MOM, WANT SOME TEA?"

Poor twins, they never stood a chance.

This is my first fanfiction, so I would love a review. Thank you for reading and have a nice day.

polka dotted penguin number two

YAY! I figured out how to edit, and man did this story need it.