Question Time – Reload. Part 1
Couples: Bakura, Marik and Seto are pretty much screwing everyone including each other. Apart from that… yeah. Everyone is sleeping with everyone else, just the way it should be.
Reload 1 – In which Honda and Ryou try to go on a date.
Setting – Some expensive restaurant.
Ryou: Well, this is flashy. How are you affording this again? We're on a date and I'm obviously the woman here, so you're paying you know.
Honda: Kaiba's paying.
Ryou: Really? That's nice of him.
Honda: He doesn't know it yet. He has a tab here.
Ryou: That makes more sense. I don't suppose he'll mind too much, and if he does I'm sure he'll just take it out on you and leave me alone because my yami stalks him.
Honda: Yeah…
Ryou: Having a brutally insane other half DOES have its advantages! I knew I'd find one some day.
Honda: Er, right. It's not like this'll even make a dent in Kaiba's huge pile of money anyway.
Ryou: I heard he was going broke.
Honda: Eh? O.o
Ryou: Well, he lives with Marik and my yami. Not by choice, of course, who would? But Bakura seems to have figured out credit cards, so I don't expect Kaiba's huge pile of money will stay intact for long.
Honda: Um… That's bad.
Ryou: Then again, perhaps they'll be responsible. You never know.
(Marik and Bakura ride past the window in a gold plated tank, being chased by at least ten police cars, in what may be the world's slowest police chase. Marik is driving, and Bakura is sitting on top of the gun turret throwing empty beer cans at the lead patrol car and laughing like a maniac.)
Ryou: I didn't think so.
XxXxX
Part 2 – In which Marik, Bakura and Seto discover yaoi doujinshi.
Bakura: Why do none of these books have pictures in! I can't read this stupid language, it's- Ooh, I found one.
Marik: Isn't that me on the cover?
Bakura: Er. How did you get on there?
Marik: Well, I AM famous and evil. Hey, the pharaoh's on there too.
Bakura: Damn him. Why am I not on here? I have ten times the sex appeal of you and that-that royal midget!
Marik: Maybe you're inside?
Bakura: Good point, let me see. Hmm… Oh My Ra! O.o This is- this is-
Marik: It's what?
Bakura: Disgusting, you sick bastard! What the hell is- Oh, that's just wrong.
Marik: What is? Let me see!
Bakura: I have no idea what it says, but you're doing really nasty things to pharaoh's hikari with some monster. One word – tentacles.
Marik: I never did that! Honest!
Bakura: Suuuure. Hey, now you're screwing the pharaoh! You slut!
Marik: I never did anything to him! Maybe it's my hikari? He'll sleep with anyone.
Bakura: It's definitely you. Ech, this one's going on the pile of things I was going to burn later.
Marik: Hey, this one has you on the cover.
Bakura: There's more?
Marik: Yup. Hahaha, you're totally wearing a dress.
Bakura: WHAT?
Marik: Now you're screwing Ryou. Hehee.
Bakura: That… doesn't sound too bad…
Marik: Oooh, now you're getting molested by Malik-hikari's monsters, and three random guys are about to beat you up and do perverted things to you. And you ate glitter.
Bakura: …
Marik: Or it could have been drugs… Ok, I'm keeping this one.
Bakura: Give me that!
Marik: Not likely, you're all uke and pathetic here, I like it!
Seto: What the hell are you idiots doing?
Bakura: I'm about to make this moron eat a fistful of carpet tacks if he doesn't give me back that book.
Seto: What book?
Marik: It has sexy uke Bakura in it. And he gets jumped by practically everyone in the book. And Ryou just kinda stands there while he gets raped.
Bakura: Typical. And GIVE ME THE BOOK, you worthless maggot!
Seto: Where did you even get these? (Looking at huge pile of doujinshi.)
Bakura: Internet. Here's one with you on the cover. Heheh, you look like a woman on here.
Seto: You look like a woman anyway.
Marik: Hah! Ooo, this one is good. You get to screw priesty Seto. And he's all like 'oh! Yes! Give it to me hard!'
Bakura: Gimme that.
Seto: I WILL hurt you.
Marik: Hey, I didn't draw it! Eww, this one says Rishid/Malik.
Bakura: Look inside.
Marik: No fucking way, dude! Are you nuts? That's brain scarring material right there.
Bakura: Pussy. I DARE you.
Seto: Give it here. (Snatch) This isn't so – Oh, that's SO wrong! I need a bucket.
Marik: Don't show me, don't show me - ARGH!
Bakura: I'd gouge out my eyes, but I'm sure there's worse to come.
Marik: Damned right, check this out. Pegasus/Seto.
Seto: WHAT? O.o
Bakura: You know, that eye patch suits him. He should thank me.
Marik: He's too busy doing Seto.
Seto: Give me that! (Burns)
Marik: Hey look, it's part of a series. Awwh, Peggy made little copies of you and made them wear dresses. This is wrong on so many levels.
Bakura: I like it.
Seto: I hate you both.
Marik: Eww, look, Pharaoh and Jounouchi.
Bakura: Saw that one coming.
Seto: I had him first.
Marik: I know, see? You look so evil in this one.
Bakura: Mine.
Marik: Well this one makes no sense.
Seto: I shouldn't ask, but why?
Marik: Well, Jou is wearing a maid dress, and you and pharaoh are fighting over him. Pharaoh screws him, then you screw him, then pharaoh hits you in the face with the puzzle and screws Jou again, then you both screw Jou, then you kill Jou, then he magically comes back to life.
Bakura: Just another day around here…
Seto: None of these things make sense.
Bakura: Yeah, this one has me screwing Mahaado. Was this before or after I killed him with the giant pendulum blades in the temple of Doom?
Seto: You're getting your life mixed up with Indiana Jones movies again.
Bakura: I am? I was sure I did that.
Marik: Haha, you used to wear a skirt.
Bakura: What? When!
Marik: Here, look. Tomb robber skirt.
Bakura: …Shut up. You lived in a hole.
TBC
Remember how the endings to QT used to suck? I'm carrying on the tradition. The book they were talking about the most is one of my favourites, Sennen Gangu. The others were odd bits, except the one with Jounouchi, which is up on Roses, I think.