Playing House

By Kara

Rating: K+

Spoilers: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe movie and book

Summary: What happened in Narnia stayed in Narnia

She couldn't remember when they'd decided that what happened in Narnia stayed in Narnia. It might've been the argument when Edmund was fourteen, and giving some of the female satyrs at court the eye, when he accused her and Peter both of trying to still act like they were Mum and Dad. Playing house, he called it, as if a king in his own right should have to answer to his older siblings, much less his parents. Peter, being occasionally less than magnificent, had exploded back at him and yelled until Lucy had to come and make peace between the two.

She could see, sometimes, how the memories of their past life had faded from her siblings' memories. Even Peter was almost convinced that they'd grown up here and had always lived at Cair Paravel. They talked some nights about England and about how the possibility of going home was getting slimmer and slimmer. The others didn't seem to mind too much, throwing themselves into the live of governing a country as if they were born to it. But she still felt forced sometimes, as if someone was trying to shove her round self into a square hole, and her body refused to give.

Life wasn't all courtly intrigue. Just last week Peter and Edmund had routed some renegades out of the Lantern Wastes. Edmund came back with a rather impressive cut over his right eye that he thought made him look rakish. Susan thought he just looked ridiculous, swaggering about as if he was older than fifteen years old. And then, just this afternoon, there had been another fight, this time over Lucy, and whether or not they should take some of the offers for her hand seriously, especially after Peter had to duel one particularly interested Prince to first blood.

"It still feels like play," she said to Peter that night, leaning back against him as he untangled her hair from the golden crown on her head.

He pushed her forward, unwinding her long braids from around her head. This had become their habit, since her hair was too long to undo herself, and even after five years, the thought of maids and ladies in waiting still frightened her somewhat. She tolerated her maid in the morning, helping her dress, but at night, she wanted to be herself and leave off the mantle of Queen Susan the Gentle.

"It will feel like play for a while, I expect," he said. His voice had finally deepened, where Edmund's still had the habit of cracking. She had yet to get used to the golden-brown mustache and beard Peter was starting to grow, though she had to admit that it looked handsome on his face.

His fingers were soothing as they unbraided her hair. "Maybe it is time to consider things like that," he continued. "There have been offers for your hand as well."

Susan looked at him over her shoulder, eyebrow arched. "And you've taken these offers seriously?"

"Of course not!" For a moment, King Peter faded and became just Peter Pevensie again. "But if this is our home now…"

There were few native humans to Narnia, but there was a flourishing royal house in both Calormen and Archenland. Both countries had eligible daughters and sons—and nieces and nephews—but none of them appealed to her in the slightest. "I don't like anybody," she said finally, leaning in again to Peter's comforting touch. "I don't want to lose you."

Peter's arms wrapped around her, holding her against his chest. "You won't lose me. Or Edmund or Lu," he added hastily, pressing his scruffy cheek against hers. He turned his head, kissing her temple gently. "No matter what happens here, we'll always be together."

She turned, looking up at him. His blue eyes were still the eyes of her brother, the one who had always protected her even when she didn't ask it of him. "We're growing up, and I don't know if I want to." To her surprise, her voice cracked. She could feel tears welling up in her eyes.

It wasn't just the weight of a country and the well-being of the youngest two. They had advisers plenty, and the presence of Aslan when they most needed it. But there were times when she felt so lost, and just wanted to be at home with Mum and Dad again…

Peter hugged her close, his fingers tangled up in her hair. "We'll get through it together," he repeated over and over. "We'll get through it. I promise."

She rested in his arms for a little while, trying to wriggle closer and closer to his warmth until she almost couldn't tell where she ended and he began. "Better now?" Peter asked when she finally pushed back from him. He wore that silly little smile on his face.

She nodded, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. She smiled back. "Better."

He leaned in and kissed her mouth, the closed-lip kiss that he'd been using more and more lately. She tried to convince herself that it was just comfort, but knew somewhere that a seventeen and eighteen year old shouldn't need that kind of comfort from each other. "Want me to tuck you in?"

On impulse, she clung to his hand, pulling him towards the bed with her. "Only if you promise to stay." This wasn't unusual. Those first few months, he'd fallen asleep beside her more than a few times after they tucked the younger ones in.

He helped her out of her overdress, draping it over the chair next to her bed. His low house boots were pushed under the chair, his sword belt leaned against the wardrobe in the corner. It was comforting to feel his weight next to her in the large bed, even if there was a part of her heart that pointed out that it was all kinds of wrong.

"So we're to stop pretending we're the Mummy and Daddy?" she asked, trying to keep her voice light.

A laugh rumbled deep in Peter's chest. "I suppose we are." He wrapped his arm around her, spooning up against her back. He kissed her by her ear.

"Then what are we?" She didn't quite keep the tremble out of her voice.

"I dunno, Su" was his answer, quieter this time. "We just take it and see, one day at a time."

They both clung to the promise that what happened here wouldn't affect whatever happened when they got home. And while Peter might deny it, Susan knew that this as somewhat of a fairyland that didn't quite matter in the scope of the real world. While in Narnia, they would always be, in a sense, playing house. And with that in mind, she'd try not to let whatever this was bother her too much.