A/N: This is just an idea that struck me this afternoon, so I thought I might as well write it....it's in letter format, a letter of apology to Grizabella from one of the Jellicles, you'll have to read to find out which one. Oh, as always, I own nothing, ALW, RUG and T.S. Eliot own Cats. This is dedicated to Kate.
I waited too long, I know. I shut you out, pushed you away.....we all did, I guess, but I shouldn't have. I should have treated you differently. We were best friends, as close as sisters, but I still shunned you just like they did. I was angry, Bella. I guess a part of me still will always be upset over what you did, but the malice has faded lately. I'm finally ready to say 'I'm sorry.'
All this time, I've been blaming you for deserting me, deserting the Jellicles, but I think I've finally begun to realize that you weren't the only one who did the deserting. I left you alone when I should have been trying to talk to you. I ran away from your troubles instead of trying to solve them. I hurt you by not trying to help you. In a way, I blame myself for your departure, because maybe if I had tried to keep you here....I didn't want you then, though, I was too blinded by my own tears to realize that I needed your friendship, no matter how rocky it had become.
None of that really matters now, I suppose. I've held on to my own stubborn pride for so long, I've almost begun to condone my bitter actions, as well as the tribe's. When you left, they felt betrayed. Cheated. You were our belle, our flower, and no one wanted to let you go. They missed you almost as much as I did, and they didn't really know what to do about that. So I made them hate you. Yes, I freely admit it to you now. I regret doing so, but I made them hate you. It was I who told them bitter, hateful stories, who spread rumors and lies against you, turning your memory into a painful subject that was rarely discussed. Perhaps you did betray us, Bella. But I betrayed you, as well.
I have nothing left to say to you, except one last plea: forgive me, Grizabella, for all that I've done to you. I know I hurt you, and while I can't ever forgive myself for that, I need you to forgive me.
Your old friend,
Jennyanydots
A/N: I know that the ages don't seem to work for this, but I think it's reasonable that Grizabella's way of life caused her to age considerably faster, so she could be just a little bit older than Jenny.
I waited too long, I know. I shut you out, pushed you away.....we all did, I guess, but I shouldn't have. I should have treated you differently. We were best friends, as close as sisters, but I still shunned you just like they did. I was angry, Bella. I guess a part of me still will always be upset over what you did, but the malice has faded lately. I'm finally ready to say 'I'm sorry.'
All this time, I've been blaming you for deserting me, deserting the Jellicles, but I think I've finally begun to realize that you weren't the only one who did the deserting. I left you alone when I should have been trying to talk to you. I ran away from your troubles instead of trying to solve them. I hurt you by not trying to help you. In a way, I blame myself for your departure, because maybe if I had tried to keep you here....I didn't want you then, though, I was too blinded by my own tears to realize that I needed your friendship, no matter how rocky it had become.
None of that really matters now, I suppose. I've held on to my own stubborn pride for so long, I've almost begun to condone my bitter actions, as well as the tribe's. When you left, they felt betrayed. Cheated. You were our belle, our flower, and no one wanted to let you go. They missed you almost as much as I did, and they didn't really know what to do about that. So I made them hate you. Yes, I freely admit it to you now. I regret doing so, but I made them hate you. It was I who told them bitter, hateful stories, who spread rumors and lies against you, turning your memory into a painful subject that was rarely discussed. Perhaps you did betray us, Bella. But I betrayed you, as well.
I have nothing left to say to you, except one last plea: forgive me, Grizabella, for all that I've done to you. I know I hurt you, and while I can't ever forgive myself for that, I need you to forgive me.
Your old friend,
Jennyanydots
A/N: I know that the ages don't seem to work for this, but I think it's reasonable that Grizabella's way of life caused her to age considerably faster, so she could be just a little bit older than Jenny.