This is not meant to be a serious work of fiction. It is a parody of all the ZoLu and other pairings out there. I set out to write an interesting fic about the worst pairings imaginable. I know some of you will think it's cute and adorable, and not funny in the least. Nevertheless, read, review, and enjoy.

Naughty, Naughty Chopper

One day, Chopper got annoyed at his crew. Zoro and Luffy liked each other. Zoro and Sanji liked each other. Sanji and Nami, Zoro and Robin, Nami and Luffy, even Usopp got a little action. And where was Chopper in all of this? "After all, I'm a human too," he thought to himself. Then, Chopper got a brilliant idea. "I'll make a love potion!" he said. He stirred it in with the food when Sanji wasn't looking. "Now for some fun time," he said.

Zoro was outside training. Chopper walked up to him. "Zoro," he said, "where did you get that enormous… dumbbell?"

"I really don't know. I guess I forgot." Zoro saw Chopper standing there, all cute and stuff. Do you want to help me work out?"

"Thanks, Zoro! What do I do?"

"Just sit on my back and I'll do push-ups." The tiny Chopper did as he was asked, happy to help. Zoro's back was sweaty, so Chopper slipped. Out of reflex, Chopper grew large as he fell. "Oompf," Zoro grunted as he was pinned to the floor.

Chopper quickly scrambled off of Zoro, expecting him to be angry. But Zoro was laughing. Chopper laughed too.

Chopper was walking through the kitchen, getting a snack, when Sanji walked in. "Hi, Chopper," he said. "Do you want me? Uh, to cook you something?"

"Sure, Sanji! You're awesome!" Sanji made a plate of sandwiches and placed them in the center of the table.

"There, you go! Enjoy your lunch," said Sanji.

"Why don't you have some, too?"

"All right." They both reached for the same sandwich, and their hands met. As they looked into each other's eyes, they blushed.

Nami walked up to Chopper. "Hi, Chopper," she said. "You look pretty cute today."

"Wow, thanks, Nami! You don't look so bad yourself!" Chopper was embarrassed.

"Do you really think so, Chopper?" Nami winked at him. "I think these clothes are getting a little old. Why don't you come into my room and help me pick out some new ones?" Chopper was ready for his new adventure.

Usopp wanted some fun. "Hey, Chopper! You want to have a staring contest?"

"Okay, Usopp. How do you play?"

"Well, you stare in to each other's eyes, like this…" Their faces grew closer until Usopp's long nose touched Chopper's blue one. Then they embraced in a passionate kiss.

Robin sat up in bed. "Chopper, baby, aren't you coming?"

"In one second! I need to take a rumble ball first." He chomped down on one.

"But Chopper, those only last for three minutes," said Robin, disappointed.

"It's okay, honey. I've got enough to last ALL…NIGHT…LONG!" He shoveled about fifty rumble balls down his throat. "Target point!"

Luffy and Chopper were sitting on the bough, watching the sunset. Luffy looked over at Chopper lustily. "Chopper," he said, "you look…yummy."

"Then eat me up, lover," Chopper replied, batting his eyelashes. Luffy did.

fin.

Thanks to Kanthia for giving me the idea for this. I'd really like your opinions on this, so please review.