Gone Astray – chapter 9

After a year (almost), I am alive again!

What took me so long? Ahh, yes, I am a daigakusei. College sure is hell as much as it is heaven (yes, I am living quite independently, in a dorm). And yes, I'll add 'I am lazy' to the list. I hope someone would still read this. But anyway…

At last! Here comes the climax chapter! Hope it's worthy to be called such!

Sanzo and his group finally met up with Goku in the forest battling demons. What will this confrontation lead to? Will Sanzo be able to say what he has to say? Or will he bottle it up all again and end up making things for the worse? And will Goku listen to Sanzo or kill him before the monk does?

And what's taking Homura so long?

-----------------------------------------

IX. Human

Goku was initially surprised. "Sa-Sanzo?"

Sanzo stood there before him. What Goku wanted to find was there before him. He might have drawn attention on the village when he was engaging on the youkai that followed him. Sanzo might have heard from the villagers. Sanzo then proceeded there to see him.

The seeker was the one who was found.

But that wasn't a bad thing at all. In fact, it was a very good outcome, seeing that his target went all the way for him. It might make his job easier.

It just might.

After a few more gunshots and a few dead youkai turning into dust, Goku faced the monk and glared at him.

"Heh, so you're here," said Goku, "Looks like my job's—"

"Disappear."

Goku was taken aback at Sanzo's word. Eh? What was that for? He then noticed the Maten Kyoumon start to move. Oh no! He's going to use the Maten Kyoumon! But as he was about to make a run for it, the scroll came rushing toward him. His reaction was too slow. The scroll was much faster than him. He closed his eyes as he waited for what he thought of as his doom.

Then came shouts from behind him.

W-what just happened? Goku thought. He then slowly opened his eyes, preparing for whatever it was to be unveiled before his eyes.

Surrounding him was the Maten Kyoumon. But it didn't even touch him one bit. It just passed by him. And behind him were the demons he forgot he was fighting a while ago. One by one, they all fell down as the power of the scroll killed them.

After this, Sanzo withdrew the scroll and started walking toward Goku. Goku was way surprised by the turn of events. And as Sanzo drew near him, he found himself stepping back. He didn't know what to do now. Why was Sanzo acting this way? Just a while ago, he knew he gathered more than enough strength to face and fight Sanzo. But why was he cowering now? What was in Sanzo that changed?

He tried to face Sanzo. In doing so, their eyes met once again. And to Goku, Sanzo's purple eyes burned with determination. Determination…in what?

"Why are you backing away?" Sanzo, at last, asked Goku, "Aren't you here for this?" He held one end of the scroll, which was lying gently on his shoulders.

Ah, that's right! thought Goku, The scroll! I promised Homura I'd get it for sure! With this in mind, he got back a bit of his strength. He summoned his nyoibou once more and said, "Thanks for reminding me that, Genjou Sanzo. That's right, I am here to take the Maten Kyoumon no matter what!"

"Uh? And I thought you decided to return to us, baka-saru. We were all waiting for you, you know."

Goku knew that voice. "Sha Gojyo…" As he said this, Gojyo appeared behind Sanzo, smiling at him. "'Sha Gojyo'? Since when have you called me by my whole name? What happened to the 'horny water monster' thing, huh?"

"Shut up," muttered Goku. "This is not a time to discuss such things. Just die." In saying this, he took his nyoibou and ran toward his former companions. He was about to strike Sanzo, but a shadow appeared before him and deflected his attack. "What—"

"Hey, Goku. Long time no see," Hakkai said, shielding him and Sanzo with his chi-made barrier. "You don't look very happy and healthy."

"And now you care," muttered Goku, "I thought you wanted to kill me."

Hakkai smiled. What! The bastard still smiled? thought Goku, He must be serious about the 'killing' thing now. Then Hakkai replied, "No, that was just a misunderstanding on both sides. We'd be happy to explain everything to you. Just don't retaliate, please. We wouldn't want to hurt you, much less kill you, Goku."

Goku became angrier. "Didn't I tell you before that it was too late for apologies? So just shut the fuck up!" He tried hard to break Hakkai's barrier, forgetting the redhead earlier. He was too focused on the barrier that he failed to notice Gojyo sneak from behind. The moment he realized, however, Gojyo had already hit him on the side with the shakujo, sending him away from Hakkai and Sanzo, who was reloading his gun.

Sanzo spoke again. "You won't go with us peacefully?"

"I'll never go with you again!" shouted Goku, clutching his side in pain. "I've got promises to keep! I'll never give up and I swear I'll get that scroll from you!" With that he raced toward Sanzo, nyoibou in hand. He also braced himself once again in case Gojyo and Hakkai interfere.

Which did not happen.

Gojyo and Hakkai parted, giving him way toward the monk. He was, of course, surprised. Why would they do that? Did they know they were no match for him? Or did they purposely give him the way to Sanzo?

And then he realized that Sanzo's gun was aimed at him.

Sanzo pulled the trigger. Goku wasn't fast enough to dodge the bullet.

It went straight through his left chest, just missing the heart.

Goku fell, blood gushing out of his wound. It was very painful. This was the first, and maybe the last, time he was shot with Sanzo's gun, the bullet not just grazing him, it might kill him any minute now. He wanted to scream, but the pain wouldn't even let him do that. He could only lie there, aware of his sudden defeat. He looked up at Sanzo, and saw something that he could not believe he would be seeing in the monk's eyes.

It was a look of sadness, a look asking for forgiveness.

He wondered if he was just hallucinating. Sanzo had never looked at him that way before. He was about to lose consciousness, but before he did, his doubts were sealed when he heard Sanzo's words.

"Goku, I'm sorry…"

Nothingness followed soon after.

—0—

Sanzo, Gojyo and Hakkai circled around Goku's body. Hakkai knelt and picked the unconscious boy up. "We should hurry up and take him to the doctor in town, before he really dies from the gunshot." With that said, Hakuryuu transformed into a jeep, and Hakkai placed Goku on the backseat.

Gojyo and Sanzo walked toward Hakuryuu. Gojyo told Sanzo, "Ne, Sanzo, the bullet you shot at Goku…"

"It wasn't the spirit-banishing kind. Just an ordinary bullet. I keep it in case I need it to control Goku or simply to make him behave. Who would've thought that theory would be put to practice…"

"I thought so…" Gojyo smiled. As they were boarding, he suggested something to Sanzo. "Hey, want to switch places this time?"

Sanzo replied. "I don't mind."

With that, they went back to the town, Gojyo beside Hakkai in front, and Sanzo with Goku, the monk holding the boy carefully not to injure him more.

—0—

Homura, Zenon, and Shien later arrived at the scene. They found where Goku must have fought. But no Goku was on sight.

"Ne, Homura," asked Zenon, "did the boy get killed?"

Homura surveyed the surroundings more. He then saw a dried pool of blood. He knelt before it. He didn't know how, but he was certain it was Goku's.

"The boy's?" Zenon asked again, looking at what Homura found.

"Probably," answered Homura. So Konzen found him.

Shien said, "The town is nearby. Should we look for him there?"

Homura stood up and replied, "The sun is still up. We would wait here for him. I expect he'll be back by nighttime."

"May I ask how sure are you about that, Homura?" questioned Shien.

"Very." Homura smiled. "He still has promises to keep."

—0—

Sanzo was seated beside Goku's bed in the clinic ward. The boy had been asleep for hours. He really didn't expect his plan to work.

(Flashback)

"What! You'll try to shoot Goku with your gun?" Gojyo yelled at the monk.

"Yes," Sanzo replied calmly, "Knowing Goku, it would be hard to persuade him. We might as well consider putting him down."

Hakkai's face was etched with worry. "But Sanzo, you're not really planning on killing Goku, now, are you?"

"I'll take care of that, just do as I say." The look on Gojyo's and Hakkai's face told him they weren't convinced. He sighed and told them, "Don't worry, it won't kill him. He won't die."

Gojyo smiled. "Hearing the words 'don't worry' from Sanzo's mouth is kinda rare. Okay, I'm in."

Hakkai also gave a smile. "Fine, we'll have it your way."

(end flashback)

When they arrived back at the village and into the doctor's clinic, the doctor was surprised to see them immediately. After seeing the reason why, he then checked on Goku, only to notice that he was doing quite well healing himself. Still, he removed the bullet inside the boy's body and cleaned the wound for it not to be infected. He assumed Goku might wake up later, judging by his rapid healing.

"He's one hell of a person," Sanzo remembered the doctor say.

Hakkai had a comment to that, telling the doctor, "He's always the first one to recover among us, how grave his wounds might be. It's like his 'gift'."

Yeah, if not for that 'gift', he would be dead by now even though I didn't use a banishing bullet, thought Sanzo.

Now all he needed to do was wait for Goku to wake up. He still had some explaining to do.

The door opened. Sanzo heard it, and when he glanced at it, he saw Hakkai enter. He had a mug of coffee held on each hand and placed them on the drawer beside the bed, then pulled a chair beside Sanzo and sat on it. "Waiting for him to wake up?"

Sanzo just nodded as a reply. Hakkai smiled and continued, "It may take quite some time. I brought coffee, seeing that it'll be a long day for you."

"And the other one?"

"That's for me, obviously. I can stay up as late as I want. In case you feel tired—"

"That won't be necessary. I'll be able to wait."

Hakkai was a bit surprised to hear that from Sanzo. Nonetheless, he was glad to hear it. "Whatever you say, Sanzo. Okay, I'll just accompany you for a while."

—0—

It was nearing nighttime. The sun was about to set any time now. After an hour of waiting, Hakkai excused himself and went out, carrying the now empty mugs outside. Sanzo was now alone with Goku once again. The monk wondered when Goku would wake up. Was the doctor wrong in assuming that he'd wake up today?

He was about to think so until he saw Goku stir up a bit.

—0—

Goku opened his eyes.

The room he was in was bathed in red-orange light, so it must mean it was almost evening. He was on a bed. I'm still alive, he thought, Why? I'm sure Sanzo shot me with the banishing gun.

"Looks like you're awake."

The voice startled Goku. He immediately sat up, wincing at the pain from his wound. That voice could only be from one man he thought he knew very well. And as he turned to the voice's owner, he saw the one he expected to see.

"Sanzo." Goku's voice wasn't with disgust, or with anger. It was full of uncertainty. Even his eyes showed this, and it didn't escape Sanzo.

Sanzo sighed. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why won't you go back?"

Goku, after hearing the question, said, his voice more cutting, "'Why'? You told me to go away. I did. And what? Now you want me back? I thought you didn't want me. I thought you were happier with me gone. Were you not?"

Sanzo kept silent, not knowing where to start, or what to reply.

"Oh, so now you can't even answer me." Goku smirked. "This all started with you. You should know that."

Still hearing nothing from Sanzo, Goku averted his gaze from Sanzo to the sheets covering him, clenching his fists on it, and went on with all the sentiments he kept up inside of him until now.

"I know I am indebted to you for freeing me from that mountain prison I was kept in. You took me in, you fed, clothed, housed me. I was thankful for that. I wanted to repay you somewhat. But then, I didn't know how because I didn't know you that much. You were always so alone, so distant. All I knew then was that you were my savior, my sun.

"Then I observed that no one wanted to be near you. The monks were afraid of you for some reason I wasn't aware of then. Even you, most of the time, kept to yourself.

"Maybe because of those things I saw, I wanted you to know that there was someone who cared for you, who wanted to keep you safe, even though you didn't need one. I wanted to be that one. That was why I clung on to you, tried to make you happy, and protected you when there came a time you couldn't do it yourself. Heck, I even considered being a servant for you!" At that sentence, he raised his voice and again looked at Sanzo, the expression in his face clearly showed anger.

Sanzo flinched. He had already expected this kind of treatment from Goku, yet he was still caught unprepared.

Goku continued, eyes still fixed on the monk. "But then even though I've shown you that I cared, you thought nothing of it. You never thought of anyone at all. You treated everyone around you as trash—not worthy of any significance, or even a mere remembrance.

"You showed me I was unimportant, for far too many times now. I thought that was just okay, and believed that someday you'd appreciate me. But I expected too much. Now I think about it, why the hell did you free me? My guess is that you wanted someone to persecute, and damn, was I the unlucky one. Tell me, was I ever of any worth to you, even for a tiny bit?"

"Yes, you are." answered Sanzo immediately, ever so seriously.

"Don't fucking joke with me."

"Yes you are damnit!" shouted Sanzo. Hearing this made Goku a bit surprised. Sanzo continued. "If you're finished, then it's my time to talk now."

"My master told me once that I would hear a voice. That I should listen to it, and maybe it would change my life. Of course, I remembered it; the one who told me was my master, after all. But everything changed since he died. The only one who cared for me was gone. I was unwanted then. Everyone, they were jealous of me because I was Master Komyou's favorite, and was given the title of Sanzo. I went to the outside world not knowing a thing about it. I experienced every worst thing that could happen. And because of that, I threw my feelings away. There was no good keeping them, anyway."

He looked squarely at Goku, who seemed intent on listening even though his face was still etched with anger, and now mixed with confusion.

"You are right, I never cared for anyone since Master Komyou. I forced myself to throw everything away except my memories of him. But then, I heard the voice my master talked about before.

"To tell you the truth, it was annoying. It kept calling out to me. It seemed like I have no choice but to find the source and make it stop calling. I found you, and for a moment, the voice stopped. But when I took you, you began chattering again to no end. Initially I thought it was really a mistake to have taken you out of there."

Goku asked vaguely. "Then why did you?"

"Because… there was something telling me I needed to. It was as if I was the one really indebted to you. For what reason, I still do not know. There was something… something in you that told me I knew you even before I saw you, or heard your voice. I needed to know.

"I want to know what it is. But I wouldn't be able to if you're not here. I know you wouldn't believe this, but I have to admit…

"…You were able to grow on me, you know."

Silence. Both took time to absorb everything they just told each other. Sanzo couldn't believe he'd be able to talk for that long. It was the first time, he thought, he did that.

Goku couldn't believe Sanzo telling him something like that. Did Sanzo really think of it like that? Then why didn't he show this up in the first place? Why did he keep on lying to himself?

Then an answer dawned on him. Sanzo told him himself.

He threw away his emotions long ago.

Sanzo didn't show any signs of soft emotions. He thought they would destroy him. He thought they were unnecessary. That was why he never showed he cared, even though he did.

But now Sanzo was opening himself to him, telling him that somehow he truly cared. And he remembered Sanzo's words a while ago before he fainted.

He told him he was sorry.

"Goku."

Goku's thoughts were cut off when he heard Sanzo's voice.

"I'm sorry. Next time, just don't mind everything I say when it rains." Sanzo looked serious when he said that.

Hearing that from him, Goku's anger disappeared. He could see that Sanzo was truly serious about the 'sorry' thing. But it was hard to just throw away everything that occurred before.

He really is sorry, Goku thought, right now I can forgive him. But…

…I never break my promises.

Goku tried to stand up. He was sure of what to do now. If there was some thing he was sure he could do, it was to fulfill every promise he made.

He had to do some of them immediately.

Sanzo also stood up when Goku did. "Come with us, will you?"

"I'm sorry, Sanzo."

"For what?"

"…For this!" And as Goku said that, he gave Sanzo a hard punch on the abdomen. This made Sanzo double over in pain and he fell on the floor. Goku then took the Maten Kyoumon from Sanzo's shoulders. "I'll take this from you."

"Goku…"

"I told you. I never break my promises. Well then," and he jumped outside through the window, ran out of the village, and into the forest.

Meanwhile, Hakkai and Gojyo heard a commotion coming from the ward. When they entered, they saw Sanzo about to get up, his hand on the bed for support. They noticed that Goku was not there.

"Where's Goku?" asked Gojyo, "Did he wake up already?"

Sanzo nodded. "He fled, taking the scroll with him."

Gojyo cursed. "He had the strength to do that already? We really should've kept an eye on him."

"And Sanzo, you did nothing? So that must mean we don't have any chances with him now. He's really with Homura from now on," said Hakkai.

"I doubt that," Sanzo said without doubt.

The two looked at him. "Why do you say that?" said Hakkai.

"…Because he told me he never breaks his promises."

—0—

Came nighttime, Goku was able to find the place where he last fought. Indeed, he saw Homura, Zenon, and Shien there waiting for him.

"Homura was right," said Zenon, smirking, "He said you'd be back at night."

Goku approached Homura and showed him the scroll. "I got it, just as I promised."

Homura took the scroll from Goku and examined it. It was the real scroll. He gave Goku a smile and said, "You did it."

"Of course," told the boy. "I never break my promises."

With that, they started their trip back to the castle.

-----------------------------------------

Yahoo! It's done! Did you notice there was an emphasis on promises in this chappie? It will play a big role in the last one. Yes, the next chappie is the last!

Sanzo was talkative today, ne? And it seems like he got what Goku was trying to tell him. I hope you like this one! See you next time!

Last chapter: Promise!