Disclaimer: All Characters from Rurouni Kenshin aren't mine
AN: I always wondered what Aoshi would have thought about the things Misao did on her journeys to find him, so I wrote this :)
"Urrgh, these heels are killing me!" Misao muttered heatedly under her breath. "I can't believe people wear these on a regular basis." She lifted a foot up in an attempt to ease her suffering but quickly put it back down as an already scandalous skirt began to inch up to indecent heights. "Whoops!" Misao hurriedly tugged down the hem and upon noticing a slightly rowdy and very drunk man approaching changed her pained expression to what she hoped was an alluring pose. As she had hoped his eyes zeroed in on her and he crossed the street to the corner where she stood. That's right, come to Misao.
She smiled seductively, "Hey there sweetheart, looking for a good time?" He leered at her from head to toe before grinning back pervertedly, "That depends babe, how much is it gonna cost me?" His stale alcohol tainted breath nearly knocked Misao over with its pungent odor. Puhleez! There isn't enough money in the world, she thought to herself, but instead she cocked her head to the side and made a big show of run her tongue over the tips of her teeth. "For you baby, I'll make it an even fifty."
"Alright then, let's go!" He was a rowdy and excited drunk now; he threw his arm around Misao's waist and all but dragged her down the street. When his hand began to wander on her body, Misao had to seriously restrain herself from knocking him down onto the pavement. Just you wait, sicko…
She bided her time until they reached a deserted street with conveniently broken streetlights. After surreptitiously checking for any possible witnesses Misao pulled the drunk into an alley. "Oh ho ho, can't wait till we get home huh? You're a bold one," He began to reach for Misao but stopped short at the sight of the kunai in her hands. "Wh-what do you think you're doing?" He started to back away but Misao anticipated his movement and launched her kunai, pinning him to the wall. She pumped her hand in the air, delighted. "Gotcha!" Misao searched his clothes relieving him of the contents of his pockets while the man cursed and pleaded with her to release him. Misao simply ignored him and tucked his possessions into her clothing. She left him pinned and squirming against the wall and walked away with a grin on her face. "Sick perve! That was too easy, now lets head home for some food!" After spending all night on the street Misao was famished.
Misao made the trek through the red light district of Kyoto unfazed by the vice and poverty on every corner. Upon reaching a slightly, but not much better area, she let herself into a rundown apartment building. So hungry! She ran up the stairs as fast as she could and had almost escaped into her apartment when she heard someone call out, "Makimachiiiii!" Misao slumped against her door. So close… She turned to find her landlord barreling down the hall towards her in a frighteningly colorful kimono. "Hello there Kamatari-san."
"Makimachi! Is that a skirt I see you wearing?" Wonderful, she – or is it he, Misao was never sure which to call her cross dressing landlord, wants to talk about clothes now?
"I didn't think you would have it in you to buy something like that, let alone actually wear it."
"Trust me Kamatari-san, if I didn't need this for work I'd torch this ugly thing and watch it burn!"
"Darling! Don't blame the outfit for your own lack of curves, it would probably look better on a developed body like mine." Poor Misao was speechless. Even men had better curves than she did? "Now what was it you do again?" Misao quickly racked her brain for a respectable job.
"Uh...uh..Waitressing! I'm a waitress."
"Oh waitress! Anyways Makimatchi, you wouldn't happen to have this month's rent would you?"
"Uh actually Kamatari-san," Misao took one look at Kamatari's face and was too frightened to continue. "You don't have the money?" Kamatari growled. "T-t-tomorrow, Kamatari-san. I get paid tomorrow and I'll pay you right after I promise!" Misao looked up hopefully and nearly collapsed with relief when her landlord began to smile again. "Of course darling, I understand! Just as long as you don't try to stiff me like that good for nothing Sagara Sanosuke. I'm telling you hun, if he didn't have those gorgeous muscles and walk around without a shirt all the time, I would have thrown him out a long time ago." Misao couldn't help but laugh thinking of the look Sano would have on his face if he had heard Kamatari's words. "Well then Makimatchi, I guess I'll see you tomorrow. Try drinking some milk before you go to bed though – I don't think I know of anyone who needs it more than you do," With that parting shot Kamatari went back down the hall shaking with laughter, leaving red-faced Misao looking down at her chest as she entered her apartment.
"They aren't that small are they?" She poked at them once or twice and then sighed in defeat. "Who am I kidding? The only guys I attract with this body are the ones too drunk to see straight." Pushing her insecurities to the back of her mind, Misao changed into her pajamas, scraped her lady-of-the-night makeup off her face, and headed straight for the kitchen to silence her stomach. "Food!" She slurped her way happily through a bowl of reheated stew and then slumped on the couch, content and full. "Alright, now that I'm not dying of starvation, let's see what that guy had on him." She spread the contents of his pockets onto the rug in the living room. "Gum, keys, condom – eewww, wallet full of money - I guess I don't have to hit up Jiya for rent money now, and BINGO!" Misao picked up the packet wrapped in brown paper and ripped it open. Pieces of paper spilled out onto the floor and she skimmed through a few. "Drugs, money, and corruption; Jiya is going to love this."
She grabbed her phone and made a call to her grandfather. Misao waited impatiently, tapping her foot as the phone rang and rang and- "MISAO! Is that you Misao?"
"Yes Jiya, it's me. I'm calling to report about the mission."
"Excellent! How did it go?" Misao flipped through a few more of the papers as she spoke, "Jiya that fool had a packet full of money transfers, opium dealers, and dirty politicians. I'll drop the papers off tomorrow morning before class so you can see them ok?"
"Great, you can pick up your next hit at the same time then." It took a moment and then -
"WHAT?" The papers went flying into the air. "I have to do this AGAIN?"
"Of course Misao! I had no idea this plan would work so well – to be honest I didn't think you had the body to-"
"JIYA!"
"Good night then Misao! See you tomorrow!" He hung up without giving her enough time to reply. "I am going to kill him. I swear, this time I am actually going to kill him!"
Misao stalked off to bed and pulled out her Organic Chemistry book. She tried to concentrate on studying but the fantasy of her beating Jiya senseless kept interfering. Misao slammed the book shut and collapsed onto her pillow. "Crazy old geezer," she muttered as she drifted off to sleep.
"Oi Shinomori! Did you hear about Tama's wife? I heard from the guys that she was-" It was early morning at the Kyoto Police Department and Detective Shinomori Aoshi was trying to drink his tea in peace. Key word here is trying. For reasons he could not comprehend, his partner Tsunan Tsukioka seemed compelled to share inane bits of gossip with him every morning despite his protests.
"Tsunan, as I have previously explained, I have no interest in this sort of petty conversation and also please refrain from perching yourself upon the corner of my desk." Tsunan stared dejectedly, got off the desk, and started to walk away. Aoshi relaxed in his chair but his happiness was short lived.
" Oh but you've got to hear this! Even you will be interested, I heard that – " If banging his head repeatedly against his desk was not completely beneath his dignity, Aoshi was sure he would have irreversible brain damage after two years of being partners with Tsunan. Just ignore him; even idiots get tired of talking at some point. Tsunan, however, showed no sign of stopping anytime soon. Aoshi resumed sipping his tea and tuned his partner out. This is going to be a long day.
Luckily a door slammed open across the room and an imposing figure barked, "Shinomori, Tsunan, I want to see you in my office immediately!" Aoshi thanked God for his escape and made his way to Chief Ishioka's office with Tsunan following close behind. "Come in and sit down you two." Ishioka impatiently pushed his graying hair away from his eyes and began to speak.
"As you are both aware, the current situation with the higher ups is getting worse. They are still upset about this department's involvement with last month's drug bust. The evidence found strongly implicates Takeda Kanryuu. He is a very rich man and very friendly with certain influential politicians who are now pressuring me to back off."
Tsunan frowned, "But sir, that opium ring has been wreaking havoc in this city for years and we're just now getting enough dirt to crack that guy! How can you expect us to-"
"Tsunan, I said they were pressuring me to back off; I didn't say I was going to comply." Tsunan, mollified, sunk back in his chair. "I brought you in here to ask you to lay low for a while. Kanryuu knows you two were instrumental in bringing down his last shipment of opium and will be watching you very carefully from now on. For this reason, I am officially taking you off this case." Tsunan opened his mouth to protest but subsided when Aoshi raised his hand in a bid for silence. "Only for a short while Tsunan," Ishioka continued, "You may of course keep an eye on Takeda's activities. However, do not, I repeat, do not under any circumstances interfere with his dealings. Let him think we've backed down for the time being and we'll get him once the political scene has cooled down a bit. I do not want any arguments on this matter; my decision is made. I've reassigned the two of you night patrol for the rest of this month. You may leave now."
Tsunan still wanted to talk but a look from Aoshi quelled him and he left the office. Outside, however he exploded, "This is ridiculous! How could he take us off the case like that? 'Get him once the political scene has cooled down?' What a load of bull! He just wants to wait until after the elections so that his job isn't on the line anymore! I hate this corrupt government; we back off for a month and Takeda will shut up everything so tight we'll never get him!" Noticing that his partner was not joining in his rant Tsunan said, "Aren't you upset about this Shinomori? You've didn't say a word in there. Chief just took us off our biggest case and you're just standing there stoically! Or are you in with those corrupt politicians too?" Aoshi raised his eyes to Tsunan's. The piercing gaze cut straight through him and Tsunan quickly apologized, "I'm sorry Shinomori. I didn't mean that-I got carried away. No point in sweating what you can't change huh?"
Aoshi nodded. "We should instead conserve our energy for tonight's patrol. It would be a pity if someone became fatigued and fell asleep in the car, wouldn't it?" Aoshi teased, raising his eyebrow quizzically. Tsunan turned bright red. "Hey! That was one time and you promised you wouldn't say anything about it!" Aoshi turned around and walked away with a slight smile on his face. Tsunan followed, complaining, "Shinomori! Hey I'm still talking to you! Oi Shinomori!"
AN: Next Chapter- They meet... I think...haven't really written that far yet, whoopsies better get on it!