Hey here's a one shot I'm just bored and I came up with it! Please don't kill me! this has a very sad ending...

Disclaimer: I do not own CCS

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It's been nearly four years since it happened and every single day of my life since then I have wondered what would have happened if I had never left her, what might of happened if I wasn't sp blinded by lust, her face still lingers in my mind, if only I hadn't been so dumb, if only...I would have noticed. She might still be here, smiling, laughing. I want her to forgive me. But that is truly and utterly impossible. I looked down at the tombstone that have engraved on it.

Kinomoto Sakura 1984-2006

Loving Sister and Mother

I felt tears fall from my face once more...that day...oh that day, the day that I lost her, I will never forget that day. On that day I felt my heart being torn from my chest, I felt my world shatter...but most of all I felt I truly lost her.

-----------Flash Back----------

it had been a beautiful summer morning, a group of my friends, my girlfriend and myself were at the pool of a huge and miraculous hotel, water splashed and the sun shone brilliantly, I had never felt happier. My girl had just given my wondrous news. I was to be a dad, me...I couldn't believe it and it made me so happy...I had to celebrate. My people turned the music up, and I had invited the whole hotel...well those who were at the pool, to join us in our festivities. And then I heard it, it made my heart stop and my head spin.

Her laughter.

I saw her walk into the pool from the hotel lobby, her caramel colored hair swayed playfully on her back, her hips moved seductively, her emerald eyes held laughter, she was warring a bikini but she had clear pants on so at the moment on the top part was shone. I felt my heart race, she settled herself with her friends and family right across the pool, we were basically right across each other.

She and I had been together for ten years, but I fell out of love with her and in love with the woman who now held my child, it had been a year and a half since I last saw her, and she looked better than ever, a man came to her and planted a kiss on her cheek, she smiled and kissed him back on his cheek, he had been holding a child, he handed the girl to her and she smiled and continued to laugh at something her friend said,

I felt jealousy fill me, I didn't know why but it did, I held my girl closer and hoped to god she didn't see me, I felt angry now. However I heard her laughter again as I saw her put the girl who looked around one years of age down, along side the small girl was a boy who looked just like the small girl, her friend had put him down next to the girl, Sakura then walked a small distance and called the girl and the boy to her, everyone watched in anticipation, even I. It seemed it was going to be the children's first steps. Tomoyo, a friend of my former lover helped the boy up since the girl stood up on her own, then let him stand on his own.

"Come on honey you can do it" she said lovingly, I watched as the girl's small foot moved forwards, she looked like she was about to fall but she kept moving, she was eager to reach her mother, the boy took a bit longer to react however he too began to move also impatient to reach his mother and I... for some unknown reason wanted to cry as I watched them walk towards Sakura.

"Oh God Sakura they're doing it!" Tomoyo exclaimed with a small squeal, I watched a smiled form at Sakura's lips and tears fell. The girl reached her mother's arms first and then the boy followed. Sakura lifted them in the air and hugged them, she kissed her childrenlovingly. I saw as her entire family congratulate the two kids and celebrated in cheers, I wanted to join, I felt so proud of those kids, and I didn't know why.

"Go Ikioi! Go Jiyuu !" Touya, her brother, yelled as he threw the small child in the air, Tomoyo took the boy and danced around with him. So her daughter's was named ikioi and her son Jiyuu. what a beautiful names the girl's name meant life and the boy's name meant freedom. I loved what she named her kids , it was clearly seen that those kids were Sakura's life and freedom, so the names fit like a glove. Sakura was smiling.

"She was tough, it looked like she would fall" Tomoyo said as she laughed in joy, Sakura held ikioi in her arms and smiled and kissed her daughter.

"That's how you know she's Syaoran's daughter, a true Li" Sakura joked, that made my heart stopped, I wanted to cry, to jump in joy. I felt a grin form on my lips, I kept listening.

"And Jiyuu, he didn't waver once! It just took him a while to understand what was happening, they both acted like little Syaoran's" Tomoyo laughed, Sakura joined her, she kissed he son who was currently in Tomoyo's arms.

"He looks so much like his father" she smiled and continued to play. It was unbelievable, I soon realized I had tears running down my face, I was happy, I was the father of three, the two with Sakura and the one my girl held in her womb. I wanted to approach her, but with caution so until I figured out how I was going to stay out of sight, however my plan to hide was short lived as my cousin Mei Lin Shouted out.

"To the New Memeber of The Li Family, Syaoran and Kira! Congratulation of your BABY!" I heard cheers. I also heard Sakura's laughter stop, it so happened I turned around and found her starring at me, in her arms was Jiyuu, Ikioi was being carried by Touya.

Her eyes looked at me a moment, then she smiled and nodded as if she herself was congratulating me, I smiled and turned back to the crazy cheering people, they continued to cheer a bit longer, it wasn't until someone's favorite song did they decide to stop, I felt some what thirsty so I went to go get water at a water fountain, needing an excuse to be by myself a second, I failed to notice Sakura tell Tomoyo to hold Jiyuu and follow me.

I reached the water fountain and drank from it, as I finished I notice her stand next to me, I stood up and looked at her, her green eyes looked into my eyes with a mixture of joy and sadness. She extended her hand and I looked at it a moment before taking it, she shook my hand.

"Congrats Syaoran" I smiled and let her hand go, I placed a hand in my pocket and spoke.

"Thanks. You on vacation?" she laughed and nodded, she looked over to her children then sighed.

"Yeah, but even so I still have my badge just in case"

"You still the best cop, the no one gets left behind or hurt cop?" She laughed again, I felt my heart jump at the sound of her laughter.

"Yeah, I haven't lost a soul yet."

"That's good." her eyes suddenly saddened a bit.

"You're going to enjoy being a parent Syaoran...it's a wonderful feeling" she whispered to me, I wanted to reach out and whisper that I knew, because just from knowing she had, had my kids I felt proud and strong.

"How do you know?" she smiled and looked at me, she looked ready to cry but she didn't

"Because I have twins, and they're my world" Twins...she had my twins, I looked over to the two who Touya was currently playing with.

"You're a mom?"

"Yes"

"Whose the dad?" She chuckled at bit and looked at me, I looked at her and she seemed to have passed her thoughts to me, she then spoke, her voice was tender and filled with so much love.

"Someone I loved with so much passion" I looked at her, I wanted to say I was sorry for hurting her, but the words wouldn't form and some how I never said them "I have to get back to my family, good luck on your new journey" she waved as she walked away, I smiled and waved back.

My heart suddenly stopped and time seemed to slow, a horrible feeling overwhelmed me. Had I known it would be the last time I ever saw her smile I would have shouted I still love you. But I didn't I just watched her go, she sat down and placed both kids on her lap. I watched a moment and returned to my girl. Then it just went down hill from there.

The moment I reached Kira, I heard a loud gun shot, my eyes turned to the sound of the shot and there stood a man who was for one drunk and two holding a gun, he looked enraged and crazy, he approached us, the music had stopped and I suddenly found myself having a gun being pointed at Kira and myself.

"You Whore" the man spat, I almost said something however he continued. "You dare to deny my child, and say it's his... it's mine!" he growled, I looked at Kira who turned pale, the man's hand was shaking. No this wasn't happening.

"Rei" she began but he shot, he didn't shoot at her but he shot the ground which made a statement.

"Tell him...tell him the truth Kira...NOW!" he roared making everyone jump myself included, she turned to me with tears in her eyes, I knew what she was going to say, but I didn't want her too.

"I'm sorry Syaoran...but...I cheated on you and fell with child of this man" she had tears falling from her eyes, and I had tears falling from mine, I felt my world just shatter, she had brought me so much joy only to steal it away from me, however it seemed that her confession did not satisfy the man's revenge or anger, he shot his gun again his eyes turned a crimson red color.

"Now you die" I felt my heart stop, was he talking to me or her, he cocked the gun, at the corner of my eye, I saw Sakura stand up and kiss each on of her kids, she said something, obviously I love you and turned to the man, she spoke.

"Stop!" the man turned to her the gun pointed at her, she took out her badge, his began to tremble as, she walked around the pool and towards us, she passed by me, and I stopped her.

"Sakura." she smiled and turned to me, she shook her head and spoke it would be the last time I would see confidence In her eyes.

"Don't worry, I've never lost a soul" she said and kept walking, her badge still out. "I'm an FBI agent, please put the gun down" she said kindly, the man shook his head, his gun was still pointed at her, his hand trembled some.

"No Man"

"Please put the gun down, I know you must be hurting but this is no way to settle things" the man looked at her with hate, she went to speak again but he shot at the ground, the bullet landed next to her foot.

"Shut Up" he shouted, I could see Sakura was scared, however she kept calm.

"Look...I can tell you're in pain, I've felt that pain before, but I have not yet lifted a gun and threatened anyone" he laughed, oh he laughed at her. His laughter made a cold shiver run down my spine, I looked over to Jiyuu and Ikioi, they were behind Touya and Tomoyo.

"No you don't know what's it like to love someone and have them rip and shatter your heart." Sakura smiled at him, her voice was gentle.

"Yes I do...a year and a half ago a man I had loved for ten years tore me up, he left me with the excuse that he no longer loved me, he left me heart broken and pregnant." the man looked at her, I saw his gun lower a bit. "Yet you don't see me shooting a gun."

"She has to pay." he whispered, Sakura took another step towards him.

"No she doesn't it's her lose. You can be so much better."

"You can say that so carelessly the man that hurt you is probably miles away" Sakura shook her head.

"He's standing right there, yet I'm not threatening his life" she pointed at me, the man's eyes widen in shock, his gun lowered even more. "And my children, they're over there..." she said again stepping closer and closer by the minute, the man turned to where Jiyuu and Ikioi were, he had tears running down his face.

"But I love her." he whispered, she placed a hand on his shoulder, and extended her hand.

"Then give me the gun, and let her be. And I promise, your penalty will not be sever." he nodded.

"Okay." he said, he began to give the gun to her, however in the exchange a bullet fire off, I saw his eyes open wide and drop the gun, Sakura stood still, the bullet had shot her abdomen, tears fell from her eyes, the man walked back until he fell to the ground, shock in his eyes, he shook his head over and over.

I heard Tomoyo scream, everything was happening in slow motion. I felt every part of my being just shatter, I ran, I ran to her and caught her as she fell. Tomoyo and Touya along with Jiyuu and Ikioi were arriving, Tomoyo literally slide on the ground, Touya fell next to his sister.

"Sakura" Touya called. "Oh god Sakura!" he cried, I couldn't speak, It hurt, Tomoyo held both of my children. I held Sakura, tears fell from my eyes as she smiled at me, her hand reached to my cheek.

"Take care of them." she whispered to me, I cried and shook my head,

"No you're going to live." she only smiled and looked at both of the kids, who were so confused.

"I love you both, I love you with my life" she whispered, the two smiled. "Take care of Syaoran and my kids Tomoyo...you two Touya" she said, they nodded but I didn't want her to die.

"You can't die."

"Syaoran...Take good care of them." I nodded, the words finally came from my lips, and some how I knew I meant them.

"Forgive me...please forgive me." she smiled and caressed my face, I looked down at her with tears in my eyes.

"I forgave you the moment you walked out the door and left me, because I loved you, and the day Ikioi and Jiyuu were born I loved you even more." she whispered. "I still love you" I smiled and cried at the same time, I pressed my head against hers.

"You're going to live, we're going to have more...so many more kids." she smiled tears now ran down her face.

"I would like that"

"You can't leave me...I made a mistake...I love you please don't leave me" she was laughing in happiness.

"Thank you" it was the last words I ever heard her say, she closed her eyes and died with a smile, I held her close to me, and cried.

--------------End Flash back---------

"Daddy?" the sound of Ikioi's voice brought me back, she smiled and was five already. "I miss her too" Jiyuu nodded, I smiled.

"I know...and the best part..."

"She's still here" Jiyuu spoke...she was still there...with the three of us.

"Right."

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Okay I hope you like it! Review please